Question: Hey, love phicklephilly and what you do, but I’ve always wondered why all the PUA community always says you should never buy a girl a drink. I’ve always considered it a classy act and it shows her that I’m interested. What’s the big deal with spending a little money on her?
Answer: While there really isn’t anything wrong with buying a girl you just met a drink, it really has no effect whether she likes you or not. About the only thing it’s good for is emptying out your bank account quickly, leaving you having to head back to the ATM early and often. Most often a girl will turn down the offer because then she would feel “obligated” to talk to you. Once she’s done with her drink, her obligation is over and she is gone and you are left alone and $12 shorter than when you started. The biggest reason you hear not to buy a girl a drink is because it makes you just like every other guy, and I constantly tell you that in order to attract women, you need to stand out and be different than everyone else. Every guy uses the, “Can I buy you a drink” pick up line. Women are instantly programmed to respond negatively to it, even if she finds you attractive. Why? Because she’ll hear that line at least 10 times that night and you’re number 11 to ask her that question, so she’ll shoot you down before you can get another word in. What made you stand out from the other 10 guys? Nothing!
A few weeks ago my friend Robert and I were out. We were just getting the night started and took a seat at the bar. There were two really cute girls, a blonde and a brunette, seated to our right. Normally we would have been quick to act on that opportunity but we hadn’t gotten our drinks yet so we weren’t really in a hurry and just scoping everything out. A few minutes later this guy walks up, I’ll call him Mr. High Roller. He walks up to the girls, pulls out a thick roll of bills, throws a couple of $20s on the bar and tells the girls, “This drinks on me.” Robert, thinking quickly, taps the brunette and says, “Hey if that guys buying drinks, we’ll take two Rum and Cokes.” The brunette laughs and says, “I’ll see what I can do.” She turns around and says something to the guy, which I could tell by High Roller’s face he did not want to hear, and he pulls out another $20. The brunette turns back around and tells us, “It’s all taken care of,” and Rob and the brunette start talking. Mr. High Roller continues talking to the blonde, which I could tell by her body language she was not interested in him at all, she just felt obliged to talk to him because he just dropped $30 for drinks for all of us. After the drinks came and went, the blonde thanked Mr. High Roller, and then she joined our group. Besides from getting free drinks from this chump, we had something to banter the girls about all night long, like how they were our new drinking buddies and we would be using them for free drinks at every bar, or that I’d like to find Mr. High Roller and thank him for introducing me to my new girlfriend, maybe he would like to pay for our first date. They were eating it up
I don’t buy girls drinks, because I’m at the point where I know I can get a girl to buy a drink for me. It’s more of a game then anything. I like to see how many I can get, but this doesn’t mean I never buy drinks for a girl as a rule. After talking with a girl I just met for a while and knowing that we have built a connection and have a future date setup (meaning I already have her phone number), then I may spring for a drink or two. By this time it’s a sure bet. I know that she won’t be running off after she finishes her drink and it’s money well spent. Money spent on getting her to relax, open, up and have a fun time with me that I use to build sexual chemistry. So use your own judgement about whether you should buy drinks or not, just don’t make it your opening line.
Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12pm EST.
Instagram: @phicklephilly Facebook: phicklephilly