6 Signs You May be in an Abusive Relationship

Are you in an abusive relationship which affects your freedom, curtails your independence and spoils the entire happiness of life? Are you well equipped with the knowledge and information on the ways of recognizing when the partner turns into abusive? Many people go on moving ahead with abusive partners as they misunderstand the abusive behavior of the partners as possessive extra care or over affection.

But it is, in fact, an abnormality in relationships and if not realized in time and mended in the way it should be, abusive behavior can spoil the relationship and affect the entire peaceful atmosphere of life itself. Certain people misconceived abusive as physical attack or dominance. But in fact, abuse can be emotional, psychological, financial sexual or physical.

Psychologists reveal that many a time, abusive behavior is the result of imbalanced or unstable mentalities of the partner. When he/ she takes control over the partner or tries to express the affection excessively, it may become abusive. Abusive relationships are unhealthy and destructive for both the partners in relationships. There are certain visible signs of abusive relationships.

Being Over Possessive

Being over possessive is the most obvious sign of abusive partner. Possessive is part of every relationship and it is a must-to-have factor of relationships. But in certain cases, the partner may become excessively possessive, even to the extent of obstructing the freedom and forgetting the dignity of the partner.

An over possessive partner may keep the track of your time and demand you to inform each and every movement of yours to the partner. In the modern world every human person, male or female, may need to interact with many people and move around many places. If the partner insists you to inform or get permission from him/her to do everything in life, then it’s a kind of abuse. They may try to cut off all your social contacts and restrict you to even meet your friends and relatives.

Frequently Accusing

If your partner accuses you for every ill-happening in life, then he/she is exhibiting the sign of abusive relationship. They may always look you through the glasses of suspicion and may not let you take your own decisions. Many a times, the accusing may occur because of abnormal levels of affection and the partner is afraid or doubtful of your ability to perform certain actions. Whenever something goes wrong, he/she may assume that it is because of your inability, the mistake occurred.

Multiple Affairs

Having multiple affairs and being unfaithful to you in life is abusive, of course. Relationships mean mutual respect, understanding and faithfulness. A person in true relationship should consider the partner as one and only person in life, not just one among many. Having multiple affairs may make a person less committed and less affectionate.

Improper Criticism and Public Teasing

It is been observed that abusive partner may criticize improperly with a mind of destructing the partner. When somebody criticizes the partner unwontedly or tease the person before friends or strangers, then he/she is trying to implement the authority over the person in the most undesirable way. This is an obvious sign of abusive relationship.

Physical Abuses

Physical abuses like slapping, hitting, threatening etc., are most visible signs of improper relationship. People get into relationships not to be controlled over or dominated over. Instead of loving, caring and sharing, if any partner gets into physical threatening, then the relationship is to be ended. No one, even the life partner has rights over a person to abuse him/her physically. When a person gets into such activities, it is to be taken seriously and retained from such relationships at the earliest possible opportunity.

Sexual Abuses

Many people suffer from sexual abuses in relationships. Sex is not the aim of relationships, but only a means to attain happiness in relationships. The advised mode of sex is which gives happiness and satisfaction mutually. Many people get into the concept that any sexual activity is accepted in relationships. Many a time women become preys of weird fantasy of male partners. Everything sexual activity is accepted in relationships provided both the partners enjoy it. What is against this is abuse and to be resisted and avoided.

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Sun Stories: Jim the Suicidal Vampire

I’ve met so many great writers here on wordpress on my journey here. This one gentleman that said he liked reading my Sun Stories once sent me a piece he had written. I asked him if I could share it on phicklephilly. He agreed, and here is a little treat for the holiday!


Take it away, Jamie.

I’ve seen my fair share of strange things working in a tanning parlor. I’ve seen old woman who’ve used the beds so often that their skin could be mistaken for a second-hand leather jacket. I’ve seen people plagued with all sorts of skin problems, like acne and eczema, blast themselves with those rays in desperate hope. I’ve seen over-confident first timers, who tell me they can handle the machines, only to come out with their skin scarlet enough to hide the embarrassment on their faces. The one thing I’d never thought I’d see though was a vampire.

The tanning salon I work in is very small and very hard to find. It nestles in between disused storage buildings, on a dark and cobbled side street just outside of Glasgow. Now, if there’s one industry that benefits from the terrible Scottish weather it’s the sun-bed business. During the day the shop does get pretty busy, with customers of all ages and genders paying the few pounds for a does of UV rays.

I haven’t seen the shop like this though as I work the night shift in here. You’re probably wondering why a tanning salon would be opened during the night? Well I was too when I first applied for the job, and the owner told me that everywhere was starting to offer services 24 hours a day; a new 24/7 had opened a few streets over. He was an eccentric little man who would sometimes bound around the shop for hours, making sure everything was clean and tidy for the customers, then I wouldn’t see him for months. I never understood his logic, I don’t think he really did either.

Predictably, my night shift only ever saw a few customers per week and sometimes I would sit from 10pm until 7am without seeing a single soul. I didn’t really mind though, my wages were still being paid and all I had to do was sit at the desk by myself and browse the internet all night. When I started working there I was in the second year of my Philosophy degree, and I’m still here (a year after I left Uni) as I soon realised there wasn’t a lot of Philosopher jobs out there. I remember when I first told my dad what I was going to study.

“Oh, that’s handy because they’ve just opened a big fuckin’ philosophy factory in the city!” he groaned sarcastically at me. I think I had always known it’d be a hard to get a job, but I was young and so full of opinions. It would have been nice to be able to afford to move out of my parents’ house though.

I came to know few of the customers get quite well though as they were mostly regulars. When I’d ask them why they were coming to a tanning salon at 2am, they would always give the same kind of response. They liked the privacy that the darkness of night brought with it.

Frank was my most regular customer, I’d usually see him 3 or 4 times a week. The poor bastard had the worst eczema I’d ever seen, I mean his whole face and neck were covered in scaly, red skin. Frank would always have a smile on his face though and swore that the sun-beds were great for his condition. I never saw any improvement in him, but I never once warned him of the how dangerous too much tanning here would pose. Who was I to judge? I think it’s always very important to remember that you can’t judge the actions of someone who is suffering from something you’ll never understand.

So, back to the vampire I hear you ask? Well it was one particularly quite night in the spring, when just after midnight a small innocuous looking man pushed his way past the rickety wooden door. I had never seen him in the shop before, but we did get the occasional newbie.

“Evening” I said, looking up from my PC

“Nice to meet you” he replied with a wry smile and a well-to-do English accent. He was a dumpy looking man, with pasty white skin and thinning curly hair atop his oddly shaped head. He must have been in his 50’s, but the bags under his eyes and a generally dishevelled look made him appear a lot older.

“Bed or booth?” I asked almost robotically, like I was programmed to.

“No, no” He laughed “I’m not ready for that just yet”

He shuffled towards me, an old duffle bag which hung off his shoulder made metallically clangs as he walked. He stopped just short of my desk and just stood there, a friendly smile on his face. He looked me up and down, then I saw him silently mouth “Jamie” as he read my name badge.

“James Jones Esquire” He said with an outreached hand “But it’s Jim to my friends”

I shook it cautiously, he had cold, rough hands and a powerful grip for a small guy.

“Pleased to meet you Mr Jones”

“Please…call me Jim” He said with a wink.

I scanned him then his bag. This was certainly a bit strange but I did crave something different to break the monotony.

“If you’re here to try and sell something you’ve got the wrong guy. I just work here” I gestured to his bag.

“Ah, well yes and no…you see old chap, I am here to sell something to you in particular…an opportunity.”

He had definitely perked my interest, I mean I was pretty sure he was bat shit crazy but his demeanour was so friendly and relaxed that I didn’t feel ill at ease at all.

“So, you’re not here to use one of the beds?”

“Well that depends on how our conversation goes!” He laughed and clapped his hands together “May I sit?”


“They never had these sorts of places when I was a lad. Smashing things that they are.” He spoke as he sat across from me, looking around with a wondrous gaze.

I must have had one hell of a bemused face on me at that moment. Who was this weird little man? He had certainly made my night more interesting.

“You know, I’ve lived in this city for years and I would never had known this place was here. Such an odd little spot, wouldn’t you agree?” He asked as he scrunched up his face.

“Yeah, I mean it’s a busy wee place during the day…but at night, not so much.”

He nodded his head “24 hour access to the sun! Must attract a few curious folk, eh?”

“Not really, in fact you’re the first person to walk in here since I started my shift”

“Ah…well you see I’m a bit of a night owl!” he laughed as I studied him.

After a few moments of silence, he said “Well, Jamie, I’m sure you’re wondering who this strange fellow that sits before you is, and probably more importantly, what he wants?”

“Yeah, that’s about right” I smiled.

“Well Jamie…I want, or rather hoped, that you’d help me kill myself tonight!” He beamed and flicked his wrist out with glee.

I sputtered and laughed, taken aback by his excited tone and twisted words “You want…me to what?”

“Sorry old chap, maybe I rushed into that a bit there, I’m just a tad excited…Perhaps I should explain myself a bit?”

“Please do” I was still laughing nervously, yet I was more fascinated than anything else at that point.

“Well, the three things you should know about me (and you already know one) My name – Jim Jones, my age – 126 years young and last, but not least…I am a vampire.”

I knew it: bat shit crazy.

“Okay, so you’re a 126 year old, suicidal vampire who’s just walked into a tanning salon? Sounds like the start of a shite joke doesn’t it?”

He cackled and slapped his knee “Yes, quite! I know it all seems a bit ridiculous doesn’t it?” he wiped a tear from his eye as he chuckled away. “What do you find most difficult to believe: that I want you to help me kill myself, that I’m a vampire or that I’m 126 years old?”

“Personally, I don’t think you don’t look like a Jim” I sneered cordially.

Jim started laughing, like real big belly laughs, and so did I. There was just something charming about this amicable little man, even if he was a screw loose. After he had settled down, he took a slightly more serious tone.

“So I was over having supper at a friend’s house earlier this evening -” He began before I interrupted.

“Can vampires eat supper?” I asked jokingly

“Oh yes, my boy, there’s a lot of hogwash these days in the movies and television, but eating a good meal is one of my favourite past times” He rubbed his podgy belly. “Anyway, where was I…oh yes…so just before supper I happened upon an article, which I began to read, and I found it absolutely enthralling. It was on the controversial old subject of euthanasia.”

“Euthanasia?” I said, my interest perked again.

“Yes old chap…an article you had written. I must say it really blew my socks off!”

Then it began to make some sense, my old professor at Uni had loved my year-end essay on the “right to choose” principles, and he’d mentioned that he’d send it off to a few of his magazine editor friends. I’d written all about the controversy of those Swiss suicide clinics, and how Governments shouldn’t be allowed to tell a person when they can die. I was pretty proud of my piece at that time, back then I truly believed in what I was writing.

I think Jim must have sensed my excitement because his smile grew wider.

“Oh, I had no idea that it had actually been published! That silly old bugger never even told me!” my hand on my forehead, trying to stay as humble as I could “What magazine was it? Do you have it with you?”

“Oh no, why that would be frightfully rude to take a magazine from your host’s house, now wouldn’t it?”

“Was it maybe Philosopher Now?”

“I’m sorry lad, for the life of me I just can’t recall.”

I was so excited I started penning an email to my old professor right there and then, thanking him and asking him where he had managed to get it printed. It was only after it was sent that I remembered why Jim was there, I had been swept up in the excitement of it all. He sat there though, patiently waiting on me finishing with the same amicable face.

“How did you find me?” I asked.

“Well I saw your name, and my friends helped me to find you on the Facebook, it said you worked here. Wonderful thing that internet, it really is.…I’m useless with technological equipment though, my friends weren’t much use either, we had a right bickering match trying to work the bloomin’ thing!”

Being looked up online like that did creep me out a little, but I still felt pretty at ease with this strange little fellow.

“I wouldn’t worry about it. My dad’s around the same age as you and he can barely answer his phone”

“Is he? Indeed” Jim smiled.

“Oh sorry, maybe not quite as old” I joked, then reality bit again. “So…wait. You want me to help you kill yourself because of my article?”

“Why yes! As I was reading I thought to myself “Now here’s a chap that truly understands the plight of someone who wants to leave this earth with dignity”. One line that really stuck in my mind was when you mentioned, something like, “we don’t choose how we enter this life, it’s only fair that we choose how we leave it” Marvellous lad, truly marvellous stuff.”

I was a bit of a mixed bag of emotions then. I was so thrilled that my work had finally been published, and that people, even just one mad man, had connected with it. On the other hand, I was a bit more wary of Jim now, I was beginning to think he was seriously going to hurt himself.

“Why do you want to kill yourself? Are you sick?”

“No, vampires don’t get sick like mortals do. Maybe one of the only benefits of this god forsaken life is that I haven’t had a cold since 1956!” then he took a sombre tone “I want to die because of what I’m becoming …a monster”

I looked at him, this man genuinely believed he was a vampire.

“What do you mean?” I asked

“Well in the beginning, everything wasn’t that bad. I had my lovely wife Norma by my side, and she stood by me even when I couldn’t stand outside in the daylight. She really understood and helped me. But she grew older and older and I stayed like this, forever in my twilight years.”

“Oh” I said, suddenly getting an idea “So you’re feeling this way because your wife passed?”

“Norma died in 1978 boy! Long before you were even born!” he chuckled, then grew stern again “I’ve married since though: Jean, she passed in 1991…then to Wilma who passed a few years back. You see? I’m cursed to live and love while others are blessed with mortality and the sweetness of a flickering life.” His head were in his hands now.

“Have you maybe thought about seeing a psychiatrist Jim?

“None of them ever helped me lad. I’m so alone…I’ve only ever met one other Vampire, and that’s the one that turned me into this…and I wouldn’t want to meet him again, frightful fellow that he was.”

Jim had went from being a jovial chatterbox into sad man, bleeding his soul to a stranger. I was beginning to feel uncomfortable.

“Look, Jim, I’m maybe not the best person to speak to on this matter. I mean, yeah my essay was on the subject but-”

“The hunger Jamie…it grows as I grow colder towards humanity. I try and I try but it gnaws away at me. You said it yourself in your piece, you wrote about how a man should be able to end his life if he feels he will endanger others. I will Jamie, I’ve done it before…tonight was the final straw.” Jim said wiping his tears and regaining his composure.

A tension had filled the room.

“I’ve tried to take my own life twice before. The first time I threw myself onto the street in the middle of the day and I was engulfed in flames. I was too much of a coward to go through with it though. That’s all I am at the end of the day”

This guy had serious problems, I told myself as I began thinking about calling the police.

“The second time?” I asked

“Do you know what happens when you try to stake a vampire and miss his heart, lad? I sure didn’t” he trailed off, looking at his scuffed shoes “when Jean found out what I was she was horrified, so she was. I asked her to kill me…wooden stake I’d heard.”

Then he took a long pause, staring reflectively off the left before slowly turning his head back towards me “Do you know what happens when you miss, boy?” he looked straight at me, his eyes seemed darker.

I gulped, I may have had more than a foot and 100 pounds on him, but he was absolutely terrifying in that moment. The tension built as he awaited my answer. Then a loud ding startled me, but Jim barely flinched.

“Hiya Jambo” Frank said as he strolled in towards his usual bed. I tried to make eye contact with him to signal that something was up, but Frank had a habit of not looking people in the eye, just keeping his head down and hoping no one would ask him any questions. When I turned back towards Jim he was sitting there with that big goofy smile on his face again.

“Jesus, what in God’s name is wrong with that poor chap’s face?” he asked in a hushed tone.

“Frank has eczema, really bad eczema”

“Oh, and your fancy sun machine helps him?”

“Maybe…well I don’t know really. He seems to thinks so, so who am I to say?”

“Exactly my boy! How can we judge others if we don’t understand their problems” Jim looked at me, knowingly. I think I had written something along those lines in my essay.

I paused for a moment before asking “Jim, did you see the way Frank smiles when he walks in here though. I mean the unfortunate guy has to deal with that, and he does so with the right attitude…don’t you think you can deal with whatever’s going on with you?”

Jim sat back contemplating my question, before leaning in again “That chap still has hope though, you think he’ll still be smiling if he realises that those machines don’t help him? That he’s cursed to walk the earth like that? No, the day will come when he’ll be sitting where I am”

“Look, I get that you’ve got problems, we all do. What makes you think I can help though? I’m just a guy that works in a tanning salon…can’t you find anyone else?”

“Jamie, now listen, I like to think of myself as a civilised chap. I was a well-respected member of the community I grew up in…you know, before this happened to me. I have to leave on my terms, I want to leave with dignity. I’ve felt this way for years, but reading your work tonight…I know you’re the one to help me” He began laughing again “It’s just one of life’s beautiful little coincidences that you work in a place like this, wouldn’t you agree?”

I felt real pity for this man, he was so confused and suffering from such wicked mood swings. He’d laugh one minute, telling me a joke then the next he would grow stern, almost aggressive, and plead with me to help him. It must have been a good twenty minutes of this, back and forth. Frank still hadn’t emerged and I had almost forgotten he was there, I wondered if he was just sitting listening to all this. Jim didn’t seem to care if he was though.

Eventually, Jim pulled his duffle bag closer to him and began to unzip it, ensuring that I couldn’t see its contents. He withdrew a white piece of fabric, buckles, straps…then it dawned on me, it was a straight-jacket.

“What the fuck?” I asked puzzled.

“All you have to do is put me in this, and then tie this around me…” he said, withdrawing a clunky looking metal chain “and strap me into one of those machines. That’ll do the trick I’m sure” Then he took an urn from the bag “And then just sweep me into this when I’m done. I would prefer you scatter me into the ocean, but anywhere scenic would do really…I’m not too fussy” He chuckled.

“Jesus Jim, you’re fucking crazy!”

“Why is it so crazy to want to leave this forsaken life? I never chose it, it was thrust upon me…won’t you please help me lad? I thought you understood this sort of thing?”

I stood up, ready to throw this loony out of my shop.

“For starters Jim, I don’t believe you’re a bloody Vampire…I think you’re mentally ill”

“Well hey, steady on now there son-”

“And if you’ve hurt anyone I think you really need to go tell the police…Did you kill your wife?”

Jim looked away, dropping all the equipment he had in his hands and it rattled against the hard floor. He walked towards the window, staring out at the cold night.

“I did. I never meant to though, you’ll just have to trust me on that. Believe me, I’ve killed more than my fair share…and felt nothing. My humanity is fleeting Jamie, I can feel the last of it leaving me. That’s why you’ll have to do this tonight, before I hurt anyone else. I can’t do it by myself…I’m such a goddamned coward.”

I had backed off, standing behind my desk I slowly reached for my phone to call the police. This man was unhinged at best, at worst…I dreaded to think if he wasn’t lying about hurting all those people.

“Your machines here are perfect for the job, my boy. The old stake to the heart is far too dangerous for you. If you missed…well I can’t really describe it, but that monster inside of me takes control when I’m under attack…do you understand?” He was still looking out of the window as he spoke calmly.

“S-s-sure, yeah no problem…” I began as I fumbled around the desk in panic.

“So you’ll help?” Jim turned, smile as wide as the room.

I had already dialled “9” on my phone when I noticed an email on my computer from the corner of my eye. Now, you’re probably thinking “to hell with the email…phone the police!” and you’re right, I probably should have. But an uglier picture was beginning to emerge.

The message was from my old Professor, it read:

“Hi Jamie, long time no speak. Can’t sleep either? Sorry I don’t know what you mean by “where it was published”? Did you ever send me a copy of your piece? Because I never received it.

Sorry about that, should have gotten back to you sooner. How are you by the way?

Speak soon,

Prof. Murray.”

I could see Jim looking at me as I read, but he continued to stand patiently, that smile on his face.

“W-where did you say you read my article, Jim?” I began to mumble

“What’s that lad?”

“My article was never published…the only place you could have read it was…my house?”

Jim’s smile dropped and he sighed disappointedly, pacing towards his duffle bag. “Oh dear…I was really hoping it wouldn’t come to this” He reached into his bag for its final contents. A splintered wooden stake and a blood speckled paper copy of my article. The dots were beginning to join in my head.

“Where did you get that?” I screamed.

“You know I wasn’t lying about the hunger, my boy. I really do try and control myself, but I just can’t sometimes”

“What have you done!” I screamed once more. I started flicking through my phone to call my mum, to make sure she was…

He continued to speak.

“Tonight is the worst I’ve felt after I’ve eaten supper in a long time…I just couldn’t control my urge any longer. I wanted to taste…, I needed it” he growled so fiercely and loud that I froze in fear. Then he returned to that calm demeanour, placing the stake and the article on my table. “It wasn’t personal Jamie, they were just the first people I saw…I snuck in through the kitchen, when I happened upon that on your dining room table” he pointed to the article “It really caught my attention…I sat and read the whole thing, it really is marvellous stuff!”

I hit the “call button” on my phone and listened. I heard it ring: once, twice…then I realised the ringing was coming from Jim’s pocket. He continued barely acknowledging it.

“After I had finished, I was honestly just going to leave…your article gave me that hope I was talking about earlier. The idea that someone would show me enough mercy to put me out of my misery. I really am truly sorry my dear boy”

“What…did you do to my parents?”

Jim sighed again, looking down sorrowfully “They walked in and saw me there, then that primal hunger came to the forefront and I just can’t control it…I know I told you that you were the one for this job because you understood how important dying with dignity is; and that is true. But, there was another reason lad. I wronged you tonight, a wrong that cannot be righted…you deserve to be the one to end my story”

“You sick psychopath!” I grabbed his arms and pushed him back against the door.

“I was hoping we would be able to do this in a more civilised way…but I feared it would come to this” he groaned as he fell to the floor “Take that stake, end my wretched life…this is your opportunity!”

I can’t explain it, but the rage built up inside me to a point where I actually complied with the maniac. In one move I grabbed that piece of splintery wood and then I was on top of him, bringing it down on him again and again. He squealed in agony but kept his arms by his side as I staked his chest and neck over and over. His blood sprayed my face, fuelling my hatred as I hacked away.

After it was all over I sat by his mangled body, totally drenched in blood. Frank had finally emerged and he stood gawping at me from the entrance to his sun bed room.

“He…he killed my mum and dad…” I sobbed as the reality set in.

Frank stood speechless, his eyes wide with terror and he surveyed the room. I looked up, about to tell him to phone for the police when I noticed that he was looking at me anymore, rather his eyes moved to something that was behind me…standing behind me.

“I warned you about missing, boy”

Then it felt like a small car had collided with me as I was bundled onto my stomach by Jim, his bone-breaking strength like nothing I’d ever felt. A sharp pain rang through my body as his teeth sunk into my neck and I let out a desperate scream. I could feel the blood draining from my body.

I tried to signal Frank to help, but he was frozen. In his best efforts, he shouted

“Get off of him!”

I think that was the first time that Jim noticed he was standing there as his teeth withdrew from my neck and his head snapped towards Frank.

“Oh shit!” Frank screamed as he stumbled backwards.

The beast on top of me was so quick though, he moved almost like a panther. With one leap he bounded onto the wall where Frank stood, then kicked himself diagonally across to the other side of the hall and then with one final launch he threw himself at Frank, all without touching the floor. Both of them crashed into the sunbed room, the cheap door splintering from Jim’s sheer strength.

I lay dying, blood oozing from my neck as I gasped my last breaths. I kept my eyes trained on that doorway though, hoping to see Frank emerge; I never did. What I did see was a brilliant light as the lid of the sunbed cracked off its hinges in the struggle. The whole room was bathed in that UV glow, which flooded out of the bed and illuminated me.

I heard Jim scream, well more like a howl, as he stumbled out with burning flesh. Engulfed in flames, he made his way past me and with a beleaguered moan he threw himself out the shop window.

I managed to see him one last time before everything faded to black. He was stood outside, his red eyes fixed on mine. His skin was all blackened and bubbling, I can still smell that stench. He pursed his lips into a disappointed wince, shaking his head as he turned and took off into the night.

I gasped once, twice…then died. I suppose in some sense I actually did.

I awoke a few hours later as I was being dragged from tanning salon. I could still smell that putrid burning flesh and I thought Jim may have been the man who had me by the shoulders. When I looked down however, I realised it was my arm that was engulfed in flames, bubbling my skin into horrible blisters. The UV light which had saved me earlier was now burning me.

The man then laid me on the ground when we were a few metres from the salon and stamped the fire out with his boots. I howled in agony with each crunch before the flames finally died. I then peered up to see my saviour, he was a tall, handsome man with a face that was all so familiar to me…it was Frank, I barely recognised him without the thick, red scales on his body.

“Frank?” I mumbled

He looked down and smiled at me, the first time I think we’d ever mad true eye contact.

“Hey Jambo” he beamed back at me “look at my face!”

So that’s how my story began. Frank helped me tidy up the shop before the morning shift, I told the owner we had been robbed last night and they’d trashed the beds and even stolen the video cameras and footage, those bastards. My wounds all healed within minutes and Frank’s never even had the slightest touch of eczema since that night. We were night owls now too.

I never saw Jim again but he was right about the coldness you feel inside once you’re like him. I mean, I felt sad that my parents were brutally murdered, of course I did, but it wasn’t like it should have been.

Anyway, not much has changed for me really, well I have my own house now. I still work nightshift in the salon and you’d be surprised how little the sun actually affects you when you’re living in Scotland.

Yes, I do understand the irony of a Vampire working in a tanning salon by the way. Frank points this out every time I see him. He still comes in every now and then, updating me on how great his life is now that he’s out meeting girls and making friends.

One man’s curse is another’s blessing I guess.

Thanks for the great Sun Story, Jamie!

Happy Halloween, everyone!


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Writers Wanted

I’ve decided I’d like to feature and promote other writers on phicklephilly. I have one running now once a week but I’d like to help other bloggers promote their blogs and get more followers.

Do you write about something really unique? It doesn’t have to be like my blog. “Dating and Relationships.” But that would be a plus.

I want all voices, all races, and all genders. 2019 could be a game changing year for us all.

Love, Sex, Erotica, Health, Movies, Art, Music, Lifestyles, etc. Comment on this post if you think you’ve got something I could share. I think we should mix it up and have some really interesting content that my readers and your readers will love.

I have one great lady’s blog already scheduled for every week in 2019, but let’s get some more writers on here and build our following together!


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Ambria – Chapter 10 – Matinee Day – Part Two

I have the tickets. I’m ready to roll. I don’t want to see this film at 4pm. Uber, be earnest in your trek.

I go outside and smoke a cigarette because I’m stressed. I can’t be late for anything, especially not a film.

I’m out there standing in the courtyard looking out on 2nd street. There is a tap on my shoulder, and it’s Ambria. She’s here!

I grab her and usher into the theater. The girl tells us the movie is just beginning but we can go in now. We scramble town the dark hallway and into the theater.

“Tonight on Dealbreakers”  I say.

Ambria gets a fit of laughing because she gets the joke. The bit I just said is my father talking. It means, if you are late for a film I may dump you and date someone else. But I’ve done it in an ironic sarcastic way, and baby loves it. This way Ambria is such a good match for me. I can rip and she is tantalized by my jokes. She gets it and giggles for 10 minutes straight.

I climb into the darkness to find some seats in the back. There’s 5 people in the theater and I love it so much. I love film and cinema so mush when I am in a theater and It’s empty I am so turned on.

It’s quiet. You can sit wherever you want. No children. Empty. Just that beautiful presence in the dark that unfolds before you and who you’re with.

A handful of film lovers or old people who will remain quieter during the film. No cell phones. No texting. Just watch a big beautiful movie in a theater and feel the power of the art in the darkness. It’s glorious. I wanted this with Ambria.

She loves it. She’s ready. We’re up in the back. I don’t know what this film is about bit I don’t care. It’s Monday. Everybody is at work hating their lives and we are about to watch a great film together and we’re off.


Off is so good. She’s so sorry she was late and I’m a very forgiving because I like her and it’s not her fault and she killed herself getting down here. I ask her if she wants anything. she says she has some sort of spicy crunchy snacks which is awesome if you’ve snuck chow in. she asks me I’d want anything and I tell her I would love a small popcorn with extra butter and a medium diet coke. I’m checking and wondering and she says she’s going to get it.

I tell her it’s ok but she insists because she says she was late and I paid for the tickets. Ambria is so hot I don’t give a shit about any of that. But… greasy buttery popcorn and soda would be pretty awesome right now.

she insists and goes to the snack bar. I sit back and try to absorb ‘ My Cousin Rachel” (Great movie by the way)

Baby returns with a small buttery bag of popcorn, a medium dite Coke which is so huge I can’t lift it and a straw and napkins. I’m going to go ahead and say good girlfriend at this junction.

If you’re having any doubts about Me Cousin Rachel, let me tell you the film is amazing. Great story that will leave you guessing. So good you’ll watch it and not molest your date during it.

After the film we walked up to Market street and I showed her the Independence Beer Garden. Best beer garden in the city.

Check it out: http://www.phlbeergarden.com/

Yea… it’s God.

I showed it to her but didn’t want to hang.

Don’t worry, I’ll meet up with her there in the next episode.

The weather wasn’t murder so we walked back to center city to find a cool spot to stop.

Of course we stop at Square 1682 on a Monday, because my boy Roman is there and I know we’ll be secured. I of course go with chardonnay with a side of ice and Ambria goes with something from the cocktail list that is light.

We’re tight at the bar, chatting, laughing and talking to Roman. But when she had to go to the Ladies room, I had the opportunity to show her where is was. We went up the back stairs that brought us two the second floor. I took her into the front banquet room which is empty and dark. This is was just an opportunity to make out with her like a teenager.

I knew it would it would be empty and quiet an I knew I could rip into my love.

Her lips are that of a girlfriend. Her tongue of a lover. Yt’s like our mouths were made to kiss each other.

I can’t get enough of her. Ambria is hungry and ready, I know I have to wait. But the kettle is about to explode.


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 12pm & 7pm EST.

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Signs That You Are Dating A Perfect Guy

Signs That You Are Dating A Perfect Guy that whenever you are dating someone you have to be a little bit careful and never expect so much at the beginning of a relationship. And if we date someone we keep looking for a sign whether the other person is serious about us or not. So today I will give you some points which will tell you that is he a real keeper.

Be Yourself: You need to act fake just be what you are and be real. Don’t show off much as this can literally irritate him and there is no need to pretend fake or someone which you are not. Just show the real side of yours and just see whether you are comfortable with him or not.

He accepts the way you are: He never judges you and accept the way you are and accepts your opinions and thoughts and comforts you whenever you feel a little low. He doesn’t want to change you and won’t tell you to change your habits too. He won’t try to control you and never say that he is right.

You are comfortable talking to him about everything: Mind this if you are comfortable and easy telling everything to your boyfriend that means he is a keeper and he never judges you whatever you say and takes you as well as gives his opinions on that matter. If he listens to your problems and finds a way out with you then you are dating a real guy.


He has discussed future plans with you: If he has discussed future plans with you then you are on the right track that means he wants you to be there in future. Whenever you ask him about your future plans you guys start making more plans and if he is giving commitment never leave that guy as these days you won’t find a guy who will commit you easily. So girl doesn’t let him go.

You are happy together: Whenever you guys meet you can’t stop imagining when you meet your boyfriend and if you are happy with him and you both keep each other happy then you are on the right track. He makes you laugh at his silly jokes and compliments you.

He know how to handle your mood swings: Whenever you are not feeling good or feeling sick he will make sure that he will do every possible thing to just be with you when you need him the most and he will take care of you like his own child. He will not let you suffer alone and will be there for you. Giving you medicine on time talking to you see the doctor and making your food.


He introduces you to his friends and family: When a guy is serious for you he will make sure that he will introduce you to his family and friends after some time it can take some time depending on the comfort and bonding you guys share. You will go to the social gatherings and that time you can see how he introduces you to his friends and family and you can get an idea by then.


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 12pm & 7pm EST.

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Ambria – Chapter 9 – Matinee Day – Part One

“Everyone wants that which retreats from them.”

I finally was able to make a date with Ambria to go to the movies. We’ve been trying for a bit but mitigating factors have intervened and kept us apart. But we’ve worked out the staffing issues at the salon for the moment.

Ambria works at the hospital Saturdays and Sundays, and I work at the salon Sundays so it’s hard to meet up. But I like this new world where I am in complete control. My time is limited and valuable with my girls. My female friends crave brunch and drinks with me, my male friends are lost without me and my girlfriends are clawing at the door.

I couldn’t be in a more valuable position. I love the demand. My time is limited for the first time in my life and the key to an exciting social life is being unavailable. You give them a time and a date, and they snatch it like a worm on a hook. Everyone wants that which retreats from them. It creates value. I’ve been taught in all of my sales jobs to sell the value. I don’t really have to do that anymore. The value is me and my time is limited. Give them a good show and they’ll crave more, and keep coming back to all of your shows and buy all of your albums.

Ambria and I are going to the movies for the first time. She loves film and so do I. Turn me on, dear. Well done. We agree on a film. My Cousin Rachel. I have no idea what it’s about. I threw a few choices her way, and that’s the film she chose. I’m good with that. It’s a Ritz theater showing so I know it’ll be cerebral. I don’t care. It’ll be good. I love anything the Ritz theater does.  Always art. Always a quiet theater. extremely comfortable chairs that recline. The staff is nice and love the art. No children. Ambria hates children and so do I. I have a beloved daughter, but I never took my crying daughter on an airplane or to a movie theater. Lorelei has always been chill and a delight. She doesn’t count. My theater major and four octave soprano respects art and theater. Boom!

We text the day of and it’s on. I’m looking forward to seeing Ambria. She’s a beautiful delicious baby, and on this hot June day, I look forward to giving her kiss in the back row like a teenage boy.

My daughter Lorelei had ordered some hair extensions that weren’t the right kind, so she asked daddy if he would take them to the post office and return them for her. Of course he said. She’s my beloved.

So I do that, and take a picture of the picture of the package going back to Seattle so she can get new platinum hair. Whatever baby wants. I know my way around the Post Office. I walk down 16th Street and head to Market Street after I send the Parcel off.

I’m waiting for the bus to Old City with a singular Muslim girl and a nice looking black couple. The 33 bus arrives and I step on and drop my token in the box. I always greet the driver as I have since riding the bus in the late Seventies going to high school in Philly.

The bus is packed and I cling to the metal bars rather than the hanging straps because in middle age I no longer have the upper body strength to swing in the aisle. I look at my watch and I know I’m cutting it close. Normally, I’m at the theater 15 minutes before the film starts out of respect. But I’m on a bus heading east on Chestnut Street and there is so much traffic.

I’m getting nervous, but I know she’s on a train coming down, and Amb has been on point so she won’t blow it and I’ll be there 10 minutes before the goddamn previews start. Again, it’s a crisis for me because I must always be early for films.  I’m standing on the bus. like all busses it empties out as it reaches its destination. I grab a seat. But still sweating and panicking about the clock. I’ve cut this too close. Not cool. I’m the clock guy. I have to be early and settled for the art to start!

I hop off the bus at 2nd and Market and head south on second street to the theater. It’s between chestnut and walnut back in a little area that no one would ever find. I hope to God Ambria didn’t go to the wrong theater. But she’s a really smart girl who does her research on ever date we go on so I’m confident she wont fail me.

I’m stressed.

I never want to be the guy going to the theater late. Ever. My father taught me well but I am obsessed. I text her I’m there. it’s 12:50.

I buy the tickets for “My Cousin Rachel”.  It’s so dead that the box office isn’t even open. It’s just a fat kid behind tha snack counter that generated my tickets . He’s really sweet and we chat about my situation. I tell the boy that my date is on her way.

Her train was 30 minutes late and she is now in and UBER en route to the theater. We are in crisis mode and I ask the fat kid if she blows the showtime, can we use these tickets for the 4pm show. He smiles and says yes. I love that kind of flexibility.

I’m on the phone with Ambria and I calm her. She says she loves the sound of my voice which I find hot but I want baby down here now. She’s doing her best and pushing hard and I think we can make it. But I like Ambria so much I would let her blow it and we can go to the 4pm show and I’ll be fine with it. She’s so beautiful and sexy I’ll make an exception for her.

Beauty always wins with me. The boy tells me that the show starts at 1pm but there are 10 minutes of previews so if she gets here at 1:10 we can still make the show.

Come on Ambria. Get here.


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 12pm & 7pm EST.

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Revealed: 5 Reasons Why Most Men Find It Difficult To Apologize To Women

Revealed: 5 Reasons Why Most Men Find It Difficult To Apologize To Women

The reason why most men find it difficult to apologize is something unfathomable. Saying I’m sorry is a short phrase and goes a long way in ending any argument or rift.

Apology should be easy for both male and females but for some reason it is not so.

Here are some reason why apologizing might be difficult for men:

1. They want to avoid further blame

Women like to talk and in this age of women empowerment, a woman will take the first chance she gets at rubbing victory in a man’s face. Add this to women that love nagging and you have the recipe for unending disagreement.

Sometimes, men do not apologise because they don’t want their partners to begin listing all the wrong things they have done in the past. They just want it to end there.

2. Some things don’t deserve an apology

Generally, women do not find it hard to apologize because they understand that an apology can go a long way in resolving issues. This is different for men; to them, some things are just too inconsequential for an apology.

3. Actions speak louder than words

Instead of saying “I’m sorry”, some men prefer to show their remorse by trying to please their partners. Some prefer to buy gifts and do a great deal of material-placating rather than tender a simple apology.

4. Pride

This is the most common reason men hold back on apologizing. Generally, men do not like to be seen as being weak enough to admit guilt.

Tendering an apology would mean acknowledging that they were wrong and this will put a dent in their ego.

5. They want to share the blame

When one tenders an apology, the person is taking responsibility for something that went wrong.

Sometimes, a man does not want to take all the blame, he wants to share the blame so he withholds apology. For example, when a couple disagree.


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phicklephilly – Making Some Changes

Based on traffic and readership I may shift posts a bit this week. Just to see how it works. It could be a total fail but based on some data I’m going to try a couple of different release times. Please bear with me. Things could get better or worse. I’m just trying this.

I’m hoping it makes it easier for you all to view my content. Let me know if it’s easier/better!

Than you!


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12pm EST.

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Kentucky is kicking my arse!! — Sensuality, Sex & Something else


Okay Y’all I know this is mostly a sex blog but Kentucky is kicking my arse and I need to vent so Y’all have two choices…continue to read and listen to me rant like a crazy woman or think “fuck it!! I don’t need to listen to this crazy bitch and just hit the little […]

via Kentucky is kicking my arse!! — Sensuality, Sex & Something else


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Tales of Rock – David Bowie and the 15-Year-Old Girls

The surprise news of David Bowie passing Sunday night caught everyone off guard, and there has been a massive outpouring of emotion and support for a man whose music and art touched many (New Times has published two such pieces). Those tributes are well-deserved. Bowie leaves behind an incredibly diverse and impressive body of work, and he has inspired millions. David Bowie was many things — rock ‘n’ roll hero, queer icon, fashion superstar, a man unafraid to make daring artistic choices. He was also the type of man who, in his mid-20s, allegedly would sleep with two girls not old enough to drive themselves to his hotel.

Consider the story of Lori Maddox and her friend, Sable Starr.

In her teens, Maddox (often spelled “Mattix”) was known as Lori Lightning, a barely post-pubescent model who became known as a groupie in Los Angeles’ Sunset Strip nightclub scene. Raised by a single working mother with little time to care for Maddox, Maddox befriended a girl her own age, Sable Starr, and the two would eventually go on to party with just about every major rock star that came through LA. Most famously, Led Zeppelin’s Jimmy Page kept Maddox as a hidden girlfriend for two years while she was underage.

But before Page, there was David Bowie.

Maddox has repeatedly said in interviews that she met Bowie as a young teen and he asked her up to his hotel room. She was 14, and Bowie was in his mid-20s. Afraid, she declined. But five months later Bowie again propositioned her, and she and Starr went to his room.

Maddox has since told the story several times, including once for a VH1 documentary that curiously omitted her age at the time, but she most succinctly told it to Thrillist just a few months ago.

Next time Bowie was in town, though, maybe five months later, I got a call at home from his bodyguard, a huge black guy named Stuey. He told me that David wanted to take me to dinner. Obviously, I had no homework that night. Fuck homework. I wasn’t spending a lot of time at school anyway. I said that I would like to go but that I wanted to bring my friend Sable. She was dying to fuck Bowie. I figured that she would sleep with him while I got to hang out and have fun.

So the two girls went to Bowie’s hotel, where, according to Maddox, she had sex with Bowie, which later turned into a threesome with Sable.

We got to the Beverly Hilton and all went up to Bowie’s enormous suite. I found myself more and more fascinated by him. He was beautiful and clever and poised. I was incredibly turned on. Bowie excused himself and left us in this big living room with white shag carpeting and floor-to-ceiling windows. Stuey brought out Champagne and hash. We were getting stoned when, all of a sudden, the bedroom door opens and there is Bowie in this fucking beautiful red and orange and yellow kimono.

He focused his famously two-colored eyes on me and said, “Lori, darling, can you come with me?” Sable looked like she wanted to murder me. He walked me through his bedroom and into the bathroom, where he dropped his kimono. He got into the tub, already filled with water, and asked me to wash him. Of course I did. Then he escorted me into the bedroom, gently took off my clothes, and de-virginized me.
Two hours later, I went to check on Sable. She was all fucked up in the living room, walking around, fogging up windows and writing, “I want to fuck David.” I told him what she was doing and that I felt so bad. Bowie said, “Well, darling, bring her in.” That night I lost my virginity and had my first threesome. The next morning, there was banging on the door and it was fucking [Bowie’s wife] Angie. I was terrified of her. David said not to worry about it. They were already at the point where they had separate rooms. She probably knew he’d be in there with girls… or boys. He was totally bisexual. I saw David many times after that, for the next 10 years, and it was always great.

So far as I could find, Bowie has neither confirmed nor denied Maddox’s account of that night, and there don’t seem to be any pictures of Bowie and Maddox. That said, Maddox’s relationship with Page, which — again — began when she was 15, is universally accepted as fact by now. Rolling Stone even confirmed it. Getty Images has archived photos in which Page drapes an arm around an obviously juvenile Maddox.

And to be fair, Maddox has not once indicated that she found the experience traumatic, though the encounter under today’s laws would be considered statutory rape. Quite the contrary, in interviews in the past few years, Maddox seems joyous retelling the story. Thrillist asked her point-blank if she saw any problem with how Bowie, a powerful older man supplying young teens with drugs and alcohol, slept with her that night.

“I was an innocent girl, but the way it happened was so beautiful,” she replied. “I remember him looking like God and having me over a table. Who wouldn’t want to lose their virginity to David Bowie?”

She later added, “I feel like I was very present. I saw the greatest music ever. I got to hang out with some of the most amazing, most beautiful, most charismatic men in the world. I went to concerts in limos with police escorts. Am I going to regret this? No.”

Of course, statutory rape laws are in place for a reason. And it’s up to Maddox to define whether her sexual encounter with Bowie was traumatic. Many have dismissed Page’s and Bowie’s actions as par for the course for famous rock stars, dirty misdeeds overshadowed by their contributions to the pop zeitgeist. Many are crediting Bowie’s being an androgynous role model with saving the lives of queer children worldwide. Statutory rape seems destined to be a footnote in Bowie’s legacy, because maybe that’s how we as a society evaluate our famous people: We don’t let singular acts overwhelm the legacy. We measure people’s value by what they contribute to society, and if a man happens to act unethically on the way to selling millions of records and being an overwhelmingly positive force in the lives of millions, so be it.


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