If She Does These 11 Things, Your Girlfriend Is a Keeper

Put a ring on it.

We all want true love in our lives — it’s finding the right person to give you that love that’s the hard part. There are so many different types of people, and a million different ways to meet them. So how can you be sure you’ve found the right one? How do you know if the girlfriend you’ve chosen is perfect for you?

If you’re wondering whether the woman you’re dating is truly relationship material, there are a few traits you should look for. Here are the 11 signs the woman you’re with knows how to be a good girlfriend. Don’t ever let someone like this go!

1. She’s supportive.

She’s a fan of all your endeavors and doesn’t delight in belittling you, mocking your efforts, or generally ruining your mojo. If you feel you have a mission or calling in life, you need someone who will help, not hinder.

2. She’s a good person.

If you can’t think of half a dozen or so reasons why this is the case, then we have a problem. “She’s sexy” and “I want to sleep with her” do NOT count as reasons that she’s a good person, by the way.

Attraction and infatuation are all very good, but can lead you into the trap of an instantly heavy relationship — and those rarely last.

3. She’s honest.

Even when it’s not easy to hear. Sure, you’ll get along just fine with a “yes” woman… for a while. But to build something with lasting potential, you need someone who is there to call you on our BS.

Also, an honest person who is not afraid to say how they feel about things will be less likely to say stuff to please you, and then put up with something they actually dislike — that’s the road to resentment, which can destroy relationships.

4. She the perfect candidate to take home to mom.

…or anywhere else. You shouldn’t worry about your girlfriend being rude to family or causing a scene during a date. If she’s great fun for a night out or in the bedroom but nowhere else, it’s a non-starter.

5. You have chemistry.

I don’t mean Coke & Mento’s chemistry — explosive is not what you’re after. I’m talking about sharing a sense of humor, making each other laugh, and having complimentary personalities. If this chemistry grows, then you know you’re onto a good thing.

6. She’s not still dealing with ex-drama.

We all have them, but how we relate to them or describe our relationship with them says a lot about how available we are. If she’s still fighting with them, she’s probably not available and worse, is demonstrating how things will end in your relationship.

Note: if she’s still best buds with her ex, that’s possibly not a great sign either.

7. She has good relationships with her family and friends — and yours.

Family and friends are important in relationships. If she can’t respect these areas of your life, then she’s not the one for you. Whatever your beliefs, she needs to live with and respect them.

She might not think all your friends are great, but she shouldn’t be too selective about which of them she wants to spend time around. If she does that, she’s making it harder for you to be around them, and effectively limiting our contact with them. That should ring your “she’s trying to change who I am” alarm bell.

8. She gives you the space you need.

To fix cars, climb mountains, play video games, put the world to rights over beers with your friends, or whatever you want to do in your free time. Crying, fighting or sulking when you choose to do those things once in a while isn’t a good sign.

9. She’s not your usual type.

If you have a usual type, then you’re likely repeating relationship mistakes by choosing not just the same physical type, but also the same toxic behavioral traits in women.

The fact that things are different, and she’s a tall, quiet brunette when you have a trail of short, bubbly blonde exes is a good indicator, rather than something to worry about.

10. She likes herself.

Someone who isn’t comfortable in their own skin is hell to deal with. Occasional compliment fishing or looking for reassurance about something is on the normal scale. However, someone looking for that stuff all the time shows no confidence and will wear out even the most patient man.

11. She forgives easily.

One little grudge fosters resentment and can destroy a relationship. Many grudges are a recipe for disaster.

If she shows that she bears grudges and finds it difficult to forgive and move on with exes, colleagues, or in any area of life, then she’s not the one for you. You don’t want a pushover, but someone who understands that the past is the past and can leave it where it belongs.

 

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Tales of Rock: Yesterday misunderstands what made the Beatles so popular -Part 2

Societal norms and attitudes also factor in. R.D. Burman was one of the most important composers of Bollywood pop, and began his career in the 1960s, around the same time as the Beatles. But due to factors including Bollywood’s Indian origins, widespread racism in the West, and language barriers, Bollywood soundtracks didn’t have access to massive Western markets the way that white, British musicians like the Beatles did. That left Burman relegated to a niche outside Southeast Asia, preventing him from breaking into the international music market despite his local popularity.

Western racial inequalities also stymied many homegrown artists. Influential African American singers and girl groups like the Shirelles didn’t have much opportunity to turn their Billboard hits into widespread celebrity and lasting cultural recognition. Paul McCartney and John Lennon are household names, but there aren’t many casual music fans who know the name of the Shirelles’ lead singer, Shirley Owens.

And then there are such bands as the Beach Boys. They were an extremely successful, enduring American counterpart of sorts to the Beatles. But the Beach Boys were not, like the Beatles, the most successful rock band in history — even as the Liverpudlians credited albums like 1966’s Pet Sounds with influencing one of their biggest albums, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. Factors like mental health issues, mismanagement, and unflattering comparisons to the Beatles’ looks and fashion sense kept the Beach Boys from becoming a phenomenon on the level of their most direct contemporary.

New York World-Telegram & Sun Collection via Library of CongressThe Beatles were white, male English speakers who were able to tour and didn’t die young. But they had other advantages as well. Perhaps most obviously, they were working in a genre — what music critic Dave Marsh refers to as rock and soul — that was broadly popular. It’s true that some narratives claim rock was dying in the early ’60s, and that the Beatles swept in to save it. But those are apocryphal: The truth is that rock songs by performers like Stevie Wonder, the Chiffons, Ray Charles, the Beach Boys, the wonderful but almost entirely forgotten Dee Dee Sharp, and their ilk had been chart-topping hits before the Beatles showed up.

By contrast, today’s most popular music is split between contemporary hip-hop and dance music that relies on synthesizers, electronics, and myriad cross-genre references. Pure rock ’n’ roll, built on a simple four-person setup of guitar, bass, drums, and vocals, is no longer the dominant genre. Yesterday pokes fun at this, and how anachronistic Jack’s music is when compared to the rest of the pop landscape: He’s a solo act armed with just a guitar. He doesn’t have Cardi B coming in for a guest verse. But working in a waning dad genre doesn’t seem to interfere at all with his skyrocketing success.

”If a Beatles song came out today, it would sound dated,” Charlie Harding, host of Vox’s Switched on Poppodcast, told me. “There are hardly any synthesizers. It’s all live drumming. Plus, so much of their music is blues-based, and blues-based music just isn’t popular right now.”

At their height, the Beatles famously pushed boundaries in the studio, creating psychedelic effects and soundscapes that no one at the time had ever heard before. But that’s old hat in 2019. You can do all of what the Beatles did and more in your room with a laptop, at least technically speaking.

Yesterday has blinders on around the truth of a meritocratic music industry

Sure, it’s fun to think, as Yesterday does, that our love for the Beatles is universal, true, and incontrovertible. Where’s the harm in that?

The problem is that people often don’t see the myth of meritocracy as a myth; they really believe in it. And when they do, it can have some unfortunate effects. The myth of meritocracy, according to Frank, can make us less willing to invest in the collective good. If you think that all it takes to gain renown is skill and effort, “you have a sense of entitlement to whatever comes your way,” he says.

If we convince ourselves that talented artists like the Beatles will be successful no matter what, we can also convince ourselves that we don’t really need to provide people with safety nets or resources. After all, the best will win out anyway. Why invest in school arts programs, or fund arts grants, if great musicians will be just fine on their own?

As Mobley puts it, the myth of meritocracy in the arts can “blinker people to possibilities.” Yesterday gives Jack no career path between being the most successful musician on earth and treating his not-so-great music as an unpaid hobby; it presents the industry in terms of haves and have-nots. But conflating quality with success makes it hard to validate and support artistic work by people who aren’t superstars. We don’t know how many great songs we’ve lost because musicians had to get 9-to-5 jobs to better support themselves and didn’t have time to practice or tour or develop their art as fully as they could.

The Beatles made wonderful, undoubtedly influential art. But if Yesterday weren’t so hypnotized by the supposedly unmatchable quality of the Beatles’ music, it might be able to see that there are great songs being written by people like Jack Malik too. The film believes that songs like “Yesterday” are just so good, they would become mega-popular under any circumstances. And yet many people who think “Yesterday” is the best song ever have been inevitably swayed by the Beatles’ popularity and legacy, the song’s quality aside.

Maybe instead, the best song ever is one we haven’t heard yet; maybe it’s the one you’re going to write. Part of what happens when we abandon the myth of meritocracy is that we’re better able to see the merit all around us. And that gives everyone a greater chance at success.

 

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Tales of Rock: Yesterday misunderstands what made the Beatles so popular -Part 1

The film Yesterday has an intriguing premise: What if the Beatles never existed? Unsuccessful, moderately talented singer-songwriter Jack Malik wakes up one day and is the only one who remembers the Beatles’ songs. Suddenly he can pose as the creator of the greatest music ever written. As a result, he quickly becomes a world-renowned superstar.

The movie itself is a cheerfully silly rom-com; screenwriter Richard Curtis and director Danny Boyle don’t have much interest in exploring the music industry or the ins and outs of the creative process. Nonetheless, Yesterdayraises bigger questions about how artistic quality affects artistic careers, ones that may last with us after the credits roll.

Jack is successful because the Beatles’ songs, removed from their original context, still maintain the universal, instant appeal that has canonized them in our non-fictional world, offscreen. Label execs, other musicians, and huge numbers of fans are all won over by “Jack’s” music; when his skeptical parents don’t immediately recognize that “Let It Be” is great, Yesterday chalks it up to their being philistines. Even decades after the Soviet Union disintegrated, “Back in the USSR” still rocks people’s world.

But would “Back in the USSR” really be an automatic, surefire hit if it were released today, into a music scene whose interests have evolved far beyond the Beatles? Is quality in the arts so transcendent that it can overcome all differences of era, culture, and happenstance? Is music a meritocracy — an art form that privileges natural talent over everything else?

There’s good reason to believe that the answer to all three of those questions is no. Wonderful songs aren’t always hits; talented musicians don’t always achieve success commensurate with their abilities. And sometimes a twist of fate lands the less talented (like Yesterday’s Jack Malik) in a position to reap massive rewards.

It takes popularity to become popular — not just quality

We tend to expect that good things don’t always come to the most deserving people. Sometimes the most successful people get that way because they’re in the right place at the right time, or know the right people, or were even born into it. And art is no exception — something that Yesterday’s Jack seems to know well, even if the movie itself suggests otherwise.

Take Austin-based singer/songwriter Mobley, for example. He’s a fairly successful performer who makes a living touring on his original music; though he isn’t fantastically famous like the Beatles, he isn’t floundering like Jack. But Mobley’s position as a working, non-superstar performer is one that’s rarely presented in popular culture.

”People have romanticized ideas about the way things work in music and in the creative world generally, but in my experience, it’s in a lot of ways not especially different from any other field,” Mobley says.

“[So] how can you espouse the idea of a musical meritocracy when the history of music, especially in the Western world, has been so segregated and so exploitative of people who originated so many of those musical forms?” he continues. “Is it meritocracy that it was the Rolling Stones and the Beatles and Elvis” who became music’s biggest hits?

There’s research to back up the notion that fame and fortune comes from more than pure talent. Sociologists Matthew Salganik of Princeton and Duncan Watts of Microsoft have conducted a number of studies to determine what makes a song popular. They discovered that when someone approaches a song knowing only that it’s popular and well-liked within the cultural mass, that person is more inclined to come away liking the song too. This can create a ripple effect, with songs becoming more and more popular because they already are popular. Salganik and Watts’s research suggests that the more visible something is — whether it became that way through marketing, grassroots efforts, or sheer word of mouth — the more highly regarded it is, and the more popular it is likely to become.

Social influence has a powerful effect on which songs become popular. As art is a form of communication we often share and experience socially, it makes sense that we like art that we believe will connect us to others.

Our instincts to spread what we like, and to like what others like, mean that what seem like small advantages for a song — perhaps a well-placed promo on Spotify, or appearing on the soundtrack of a Netflix show — can lead to a big chart presence. A good review at the right time or being used in a viral meme on a slow news day could help more people discover a song just out of happenstance. Songs that get an initial bump can ride that wave, so more people seek them out, buy them, and boost their popularity. This cycle can lead to one song, good or not, becoming a hit, while another disappears into obscurity.

The Beatles were talented, but they also were in the right place at the right time

In the music industry, success is often more about popularity than quality. And although achieving popularity may seem formulaic, doing so relies as much on luck as on calculation. As economist Alan Krueger explained in a speech at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in 2013, “in addition to talent, arbitrary factors can lead to success or failure, like whether another band happens to release a more popular song than your band at the same time. The difference between a Sugar Man, a Dylan, and a Post Break Tragedy depends a lot more on luck than is commonly acknowledged.”

This isn’t to say that a band as big as the Beatles got that way just by being lucky. Talent still does matter, according to economist Robert H. Frank, author of Success and Luck: Good Fortune and the Myth of Meritocracy. “When you make the point that chance events matter, people insist on hearing you as having said that those are the only things that matter,” Frank told me. “That’s not the message. The people who win generally are very good. If you’re not very good, you generally don’t win. What’s true is that being very good isn’t by itself enough to win.”

The Beatles were very good by most qualitative metrics. But the band’s quantitative achievements don’t mean they are indisputably the most meritorious musicians of all time, or even of their day. More likely, the band also managed to be in the right place at the right time, on top of everything else.

Other critically heralded musicians had no such luck. Consider Buddy Holly, an enormously skilled songwriter who was poised to redefine pop and rock music but never reached the upper echelons of music stardom. If he’d lived long enough to continue developing his sound, he might have become rock ’n’ roll’s breath of fresh air before the Beatles had the chance. But Holly died in a plane crash in 1959, cutting his career short before he could parlay his early success into Buddymania.

 

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Here Are 7 Things Your Partner Does Not Need To Know About You

Of course, very relationship should be built on trust; but there’s a limit to openness and there exist things your partner does not really need to know.

In essence, it’s OK to cut down on openness in a relationship from 100% to somewhere in the region of 90% or so. And here’s the reason: some people really just can’t handle the truth. It does not make them bad people or bad partners; they’re not just wired to be calm or stay sane in the face of certain revelations.

So instead of risking something beautiful over an inconsequential detail that’ll likely not hurt anyone if forever locked away in a vault, just keep mum and continue coasting with the love of your life.

Here are 7 times when it’s OK to leave some things unsaid;

No one needs graphic details of your sexual past. Keep it. [Credit : Onedio]

1. Your sexual history

For real, not many boyfriends/girlfriends want to hear the step by step narration and graphic details of how you had sex in a bathroom stall at the mall with your ex or some random babe.

2. Your body count

As we already discussed in detail here, for the ladies, only your doctor and/or gynecologist deserves this information.

3. That someone at work [or anywhere] has a crush on you

Really, this is literally opening the door for problems no one wants. Here’s the thing about revealing this information – you put your partner in a position to have his imagination roam and become paranoid.

Don’t stress yourself explaining how many people have a crush on you. It may not be a wise move. [Credit: SG Hunter]

ALSO READ: 3 things you should never hide from your boyfriend

4. That you have a crush on someone else

Being genuinely in love with a man or woman does not magically take away the inclination to be attracted or to fall in love with other people.

So if you find yourself tripping for some other guy/babe, it may be too much information for your partner.

7 things your partner does not need to know about you

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5. That you don’t like their parents

I’m not sure anyone wants to hear her boyfriend say he does not like her mum. Neither is there any guy who would stand for that.

The only time this may be OK is when you no longer value the relationship and you’re willing to let go of it.

Do you think your partner would want to know that you don’t like their parents or family? [Credit: Black Enterprise]

6. That you snooped through their stuff

Even if you searched and found out that they’ve been loyal and loyal to you, keep the good news to yourself.

There really is no way to justify snooping through his stuff in the first instance. You’re going to come off as distrustful and things may just go downhill from there. Better keep the info to yourself.

7. That you still stalk his ex

Ladies, your boyfriend does not need to know that you have been stalking his ex on social media. You’ll come off as insecure and you don’t need that.

Same thing goes for guys. You really so not want to give off the vibe of insecurity. Your babe does not need that.

 

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The Beach House – Chapter 18

At 3:10 we called Gem Works. I was put through to Brian Fitzgerald’s office. “Hello…” It was a very unsure greeting.

“Mr. Patterson, this is Dale Tomlinson along with Mia Perez.” I made it sound pretty snobby.

“I am not sure what is happening here, Mr. Tomlinson.” He sounded a bit scared. Brain must have shaken him up a bit.

“I assume that Mr. Fitzgerald explained the position you’re in?” I wanted to keep the pressure on.

“I have been informed, but I don’t understand. I don’t even know you, Mr. Tomlinson.” This guy must be a complete idiot.

“You should, I bought you a boat a week ago.” Let’s see if that jogs his memory.

“That was you. I thought the bitch that stole it paid for the new one.” He wasn’t very good at connecting the dots. Pompous ass was a very good description of him. Time to see how much of his foot he can fit into his mouth. Mia was fuming.

“Mr. Patterson, I am going to turn this over to my fiancé, and if you call her bitch one more time I will make it my mission to ruin your life.” God! I wish I was in the room. There was complete silence on the other side.

“Mr. Patterson, do you now have a better understanding about what is going on?” Mia’s face was quite serious as she brought him to reality.

“Yes.” Only one word. He was beginning to understand where he stood.

“I understand that you are married, and that it is your father’s boat that you use for your water bang parties?” Mia was keeping the pressure on, making sure he knew that we knew everything. She needed this retribution. There was silence on the other end. “Is that information correct, Mr. Patterson?” She wasn’t going to make it easy on him.

“Yes. Look things got a bit out—” Mia wasn’t interested in what he thought.

“I am sure you don’t want your family to become aware of your parties.” She continued in a terse tone. “Those parties and anything that even smells like them are over. We just spent five million to get this far. Imagine what we could do if we made it our life’s work to ruin you.” Mia was getting into it. There was more silence for his side. “Do we have an understanding, Mr. Patterson?”

“Yes.” He was back to one word answers.

“To make the ramifications fully clear: you lose your job, and your family finds out why. I accept a prostitution charge, and you fight attempted gang rape and kidnapping charges. Your perverted friends go down the tubes with you. I can be quite convincing when I’m sober Mr. Patterson.” I liked mean-Mia—as long as her ire isn’t directed at me.

“I understand.” He graduated to two words. He sounded like he wanted this to end.

“You lied to the police and forced my future husband to buy your dad a new boat.” She was smiling a bit now. “I would think you would feel really guilty about that. I think an act of contrition would ease your soul a bit. Maybe a donation in the amount of $33,781 to the East Side Clinic in the care of Dr. Williams would make you feel a bit better. Did you get that, Mr. Patterson.”

“$33,781, East Side Clinic, Dr. Williams” He didn’t sound too happy about it.

“If you do decide to make the donation by the end of the week, I know I would feel better about your soul.” Mia threw in a timeline on her own. She was a smart girl. I smiled at her forethought. I decided to jump back in.

“Mr. Fitzgerald and I will be discussing your status on a regular basis. I really hope you’re not one of those deadweight employees. I have a lot invested in Gem Works and I wouldn’t want it hindered by anyone I have taken a special interest in.” I tried to make it sound a bit menacing. I was just trying to throw a bone to Brian. I didn’t want him stuck with a useless asshole.

“I understand. You won’t have to talk with me again.” He sounded contrite. I know it was due to fear, but it was nice to hear it all the same. Mia ended the call.

“You have a nice day, Mr. Patterson.” I hit the disconnect. Mia jumped into my arms. “A week ago I was powerless against that jerk. Today he was cowering at our feet. I felt like I was punching him in the face for every girl he has done that to.” She smothered me with kisses. “We’re like superheroes. We need to buy capes or something.” She started bouncing around twirling in circles. Her happiness was worth way more than five million.

“We have one more call to make Mia.” I smiled as the final stage of our plans was about to unfold. “You have to be quiet for this one.” I dialed Monica number.

“Monica, It’s Dale Tomlinson.” I tried to sound like my pre-Mia self.

“Hello, Mr. Tomlinson.” She didn’t sound like her normal confident and efficient self.

“Ms. Perez is not on the street and is off heroin. I trust your husband hasn’t left you.” I was having a hard time trying to sound stern. Mia was smiling.

“No sir, I’m sorry about that. I was just a—” I interrupted.

“I have a rather large business deal to complete in Las Vegas in two days. It involves a significant portion of my assets. I want a private charter. There is a possibility of extra passengers.” I had to get Mia on the plane without her knowing.

“Meeting time.” Efficient Monica was back.

“3 pm.” I pulled the time out of my ass.

“Hotel preference.” I told her to choose one on the main strip.

“I will send the itinerary to your email as usual, Sir.” She was about to hang up.

“Monica, I am going to need you there.” I couldn’t imagine her saying no.

“Yes, Sir. I will meet you there.” She dropped the line.

Now all I had to do was find someone to marry Mia and me at 3 pm. I really should have taken care of that first, but what the hell, it’s Vegas.

Two hours later I had a full itinerary on my phone. Limo service to and from the airports and a suite of rooms at the Bellagio. I called up the Bellagio and they had no problem setting up the wedding. Turns out they have chapels on site. It’s Vegas, baby! Mia and I called Dr. Williams and talked him into joining us for the weekend. Once he heard that Monica was coming, still unaware of the situation, he was on board wholeheartedly.

 

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4 Kardashian Sister Quotes About Breakups That Are Just What The Doctor Ordered

Breakups suck. Whether you got dumped completely out of the blue or you and your partner had been fighting for a while — a relationship ending can be everything from sad to completely disorienting. When dealing with heartbreak, sometimes hearing other people’s stories can make a difference. Knowing that others have been through similar pain can make you feel totally supported. Of course, hearing from your famous friends can help too. When it comes to heartbreak, these Kardashian family quotes about breakups are just what the doctor ordered.

From cheating and lying, to short marriages and public breakups in front of millions of fans, the Kardashians have really been through it all and come out on the other side. Despite all the hardship they’ve had to overcome, they still spark joy by throwing giant parties for their babies and making amazing fashion choices that cost more than my car. And while they have more money than I can conceptualize and a glam squad around them at all times — they still cry about boys, girls, friends, and foes of all genders, just like the rest of us. Stars, they’re just like us!

Here are four Kardashian family quotes about breakups, because they’ve been through it, and honestly get it.

KIM SAYS YOU CAN HAVE MORE THAN ONE SOULMATE

If you were totally in love, a breakup may feel like you’ll never be happy or fulfilled by a relationship ever again. Yet, according to Kim K, people can have different soulmates throughout their lives,

“I think you have different soulmates throughout your life, that your soul needs different things at different times,” Kardashian told People. “I do believe in love. I will always believe in love, but my idea has changed from what I’ve always thought.”

Whether you’ve just been unexpectedly dumped or your breakup was long and painful, your soul grows and evolves with all the pain you go through. Love is all around you, and the universe will give your soul what you need.

KHLOÉ REMINDS YOU TO SURROUND YOURSELF WITH KINDNESS

When it comes to rough breakups, Khloé Kardashian really gets it. In the wake of heartbreak, the star urges you to surround yourself with kindness. She took to her Insta to share this message with her fans.

“Free yourself from negative people. Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven and like-minded,” Khloé Kardashian posted. “Relationships should help you, not hurt you. Surround yourself with the people who reflect the person you want to be.” Choose friends who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you — people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it.”

When a relationship ends, it can be natural to feel lonely. But you are surrounded by so many people who love you, and you deserve to feel loved and wanted.

KYLIE SAYS TO DO WHAT FEELS RIGHT FOR YOU

While being in love can be amazing and wonderful, according to Kylie Jenner, it’s important to listen to your heart. When speaking about her split from Tyga, the makeup mogul noted the importance of doing what was right for her.

“There was absolutely nothing wrong with me and T, We’ll always have a bond,” Jenner told Insider. “We decided — well, I decided — that I’m really young. I don’t want to look back in five years from now and feel like he took something from me, when he’s really not that type of person.”

If moving on from a relationship feels right for you, it’s always OK to take the space you need or to set healthy boundaries that will make you feel more supported. Ending a relationship can feel totally hard, but doing what’s right and best for you and your future is totally worth it.

KOURTNEY SAYS TO LET GO

If you work with your ex or see them and their new boo making out at the downtown Western-themed bar that you showed them and they always said they hated, it can be easy to hold on to your anger or pain. But Kourtney Kardashian lays down the letting it go lawre: Scott being, well Scott.

“I mean, it’s not my problem anymore. It’s just like, I can’t control people, nor do I want to,” Kourtney Kardashian said on Season 13, Episode 9 of KUWTK.

You can’t control other people. As Kourtney says, they’re not your problem anymore. Whether your ex is a total dweeb that you wish you never had to see again or if they’re a good person but just weren’t a great partner, learning to let them go can give you your life back.

Getting over a breakup can suck, but everyone under the sun has had their heartbroken at some point. Whether it helps you to let go of your ex or think about the next soulmate you’re going to find, you’ll get over this breakup in a bigway — like, a Kardashian-big way.

 

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Tales of Rock: GUNS N’ ROSES ICON SUFFERS A DEADLY KNIFE INCIDENT – HERE’S HIS LATEST STATUS

According to TMZ’s reports, former Guns N’ Roses drummer Steven Adler stabbed himself at the stomach and was taken to a hospital after that.

According to the police reporters, Adler’s wounds are non-life-threatening and his current health status is stable right now.

Here is the report of the TMZ:

“Law enforcement sources tell TMZ someone at Adler’s L.A. home called 911 shortly after 6:30 Thursday night to report someone had stabbed themselves.We’re told when cops and paramedics arrived, they discovered it was Adler who had suffered a stab wound to his stomach.

Our sources say Adler was taken to a local hospital with non-life threatening injuries. We’re told no one else is suspected to have been involved in the incident.

Adler has openly struggled with substance abuse for decades.

He was kicked out of Guns N’ Roses over his drug addiction in 1990 … but was later inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame with the group in 2012.”

Click here for the source.

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California Dreamin’ – 1982 to 1984 – Audrey – Polar Opposite

I went out for a going away party for a friend at the Rainbow Bar & Grill. There, I met some chick Audrey that a bunch of my friends know. We got pretty trashed, and had fun. Did shots. Danced. Did shots. Sang karaoke. Did jagerbombs. Chatted while smoking cigarettes on the patio. Did shots. Smoked a bowl on the patio. Drank beers. Did more shots. Really liked each other.

So we exchanged numbers before leaving, and said we’d go out next week. Now, 20 minutes after leaving I literally passed out and landed on my face, because I was fucking trashed. So I was in prime condition this night. This girl knew I liked to party. (As only young people can, and horrifies me now- how did I survive?!)

So, next week comes, and we line up a date. Since we don’t know each other super well, we’ll go to that same bar, where a bunch of mutual friends will be. We sit with them on the patio, and we chat. She’s cute. But, that’s all she has going for her. I find out we are absolute polar opposites. Her dad’s a preacher, and she loves Jesus, and she doesn’t like art, and she’s waiting for marriage, and she doesn’t like fishing, and hunting is cruelty, and the outdoors are icky, and I’m getting one word answers saying she doesn’t like anything I talk about, while she doesn’t even try to make conversation. It’s so awkward that our mutual friends are bailing, shifting further and further away from us, until there are only three of us left in our section and everyone else is on the other side of the patio.

After about 45 minutes, I decide I’m going to need like 8 more drinks to make it through this. I ask if she needs another drink, and go inside to the bar. While I’m waiting, I say, “nope, fuck it.” And I leave. I bail right out the back door. I don’t even care, I don’t say goodbye, I just leave. I stagger to a friend’s house, explain that I was on the shittiest date ever, and proceed to get blackout drunk.

Three days later, a mutual friend Kevin says, “Man, that date was pretty brutal, but it wasn’t right how she treated you.” “I know man, right?” “Yeah. I can’t believe you went to get her another drink, and she left before you got back. That was really shitty.”

That’s right. This date went so poorly we both bailed without telling the other person, and neither of us ever tried to contact the other one again!

I love it!

 

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The Most Infuriating Texts From Exes After Breakups, According To 8 People

 

A lot of this reminds me of my ex-girlfriend, Annabelle. (You can find her story on this blog under her name)

So sad. Good riddance to toxic people!

Although Queen Ari’s single, “Thank U, Next” is a certifiable bop, there are plenty of folks that don’t really need to thank their exes for anything. In fact, many people share that all-too-common experience of an ex’s last-ditch effort at connecting over text, and their messages can be infuriating. If this is something you’re going through right now, you’re absolutely not alone. To prove it, I asked some folks to share the most infuriating texts from exes they’ve ever received. Their stories suggest that sometimes, exes can sometimes be extremely frustrating and hurtful.

Exes can poke back into your life, either by directly contacting you or, you know, just randomly starting to watch literally all of your Instagram stories. It can be absolutely maddening trying to reason with someone who just doesn’t understand how you feel. When it comes to an ex who just doesn’t seem to get it, always remember that it’s well within your right to block the heck out of their number, social media, and any other form of communication.

I did this with a particularly awful ex, and she decided to email me instead because she couldn’t “figure out” why her texts weren’t going through. In this email, she also encouraged me to send memes and that there were “no hard feelings.” But she isn’t the one that gets to decide that, so I hit her will super cheery, “Please don’t contact me again. Best, Hannah.”

If you’ve ever dealt with a particularly awful ex that made steam come out of your ears like a cartoon, read these stories.

WHEN THEY JUST DON’T GET IT.

‘I know you hate me but can you just send me a few nudes? I’m gonna miss you and want something to remember you by.’ — this message is courtesy of a college ex-boyfriend.

— B*

WHEN THEY MAKE NO SENSE.

 

Basically the text read something along the lines of: I lost a steadfast friend. I feel bad that I hurt you and lost a future with you. We were so close to getting engaged and then married. It’s sad that is all gone now. Moving on looks like the hope that there’s a better match out there for us both. But it’s not going to be that for us.

The reason that this text was so infuriating was because this guy and I had been dating for six and a half months. No fights, nothing. Out of nowhere, right before Thanksgiving we met up for date night and he said that he “needed a break”. We took two weeks off without seeing each other and at the end of the two weeks he said that he thought it was best if we broke up. He didn’t give me any answers to questions and just said that I needed to move on. A week after the official breakup, he sent me this text. talking about all that he “lost”. At the time I was livid but mostly confused. I still don’t know why we broke up, but I know this. Sometimes you really don’t want to hear what they have to say.

— Lana*, 24

WHEN YOU GET CONFIRMATION THAT YOU MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE IN BREAKING UP.

Once I started seeing someone new, and an ex texted me, ‘I just looked up [my new partner], and he looks like a tool. He’s just trying to get in your pants:). Clearly I made the right choice by moving on.

— Lauren, 24

WHEN THEY CLEARLY CANNOT LET GO OF THE PAST.

I had a tumultuous, on-again, off-again relationship from 18 to 21. When we broke up for good, I made it clear that I no longer wanted to be in contact. Still, every few months over the next few years, he would send me long emails about his feelings, drunken texts on Valentine’s Day, even Facebook messages. Most recently, on my 26th birthday, he sent a text wishing me a happy birthday and referencing a comment I made to him when I was 18 years old, back when I joked that I was afraid to one day be 26 because that’s when I’d start to feel old. I mean, how rude is that?! To ignore my boundaries and hit me with a text announcing, Hello, now you are old! Happy birthday! The text just so happened to come the day after I posted on social media that my current boyfriend and I are moving in together… so my ex’s text just seems like a super rude, petty reaction to the fact that I’m finally moving on. It’s time for my ex to do the same!

— Hannah, 26

WHEN THEY HAVE MAJOR DOUBLE STANDARDS.

Caught him cheating (through text). We were taking selfies and I opened messages on his phone to send one to myself. Saw some explicit messages had been exchanged with someone else, including my bf using the phrase “You’re the best lover I’ve ever had.” Naturally, I got mad, and that was the start of a super messy breakup. I was completely dumbfounded when he *got mad at me* for seeing the message, and accused *me* of being dishonest, saying, ‘You were supposed to trust me, but I guess that was a lie.’

— Kevin, 24

WHEN THEIR ADVICE IS LAUGHABLY USELESS.

An ex texted me that ‘I should Give ‘The Path Less Travelled by John Frost a read’ and assured me it was ‘a pretty eye-opening poem’ if I would ‘give it a chance.’

— Clancy, 26

WHEN THEY’RE JUST DOWN RIGHT CRUEL.

I had this ex who really devastated me. The anniversary of the breakup found me fragile and strong at the same time. He texted: “Happy anniversary”

—M*, 27

WHEN THEY CAN’T TAKE A HINT.

My ex told me “no” when I asked for space cause she was used to talking to me and space was dumb…. She also texted me once every four to six months for the next two years asking to catch up. I was always extremely rude. Then she texted me out of the blue saying she’d thought about us hooking up again because the sex was great.

— Mars, 26

In all seriousness, it can be really hard to move on when an ex keeps getting in your way. Hopefully, seeing more about others’ experiences may give you confidence that you’re not alone. Some of these folks really put the “next” in “Thank u, Next!”

*Names have been changed.

 

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Handful of Dates – Part 2

The Daughter

I had another one once where the girl showed up with her daughter that forgot to mention on the dating site. So as we are on this date her three year old daughter is there. It gets worse, It was cold out and she asked if I wanted to continue talking in her car. We ended up making out in her car after the date while her daughter was in the back in the car seat. It was about less than 10 minutes.

 

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