Featured

Phicklephilly the BOOK is Now Available on Amazon! (Kindle and Paperback!)

“Love at first swipe! One man’s story of returning to Philadelphia in search of the perfect girlfriend. Will he succeed or fail miserably in his quest to find love in this city? This is a funny and sometimes heart wrenching tale of a man trying to navigate the pitfalls of the modern dating world in the city.”

Hey readers and beloved followers!

I know I sent a message out a year and a half ago telling everyone my book was going to be published on Amazon. They said it takes 72 hours to review and create. That was almost 2 years ago.

I called Amazon Kindle last week and spoke with a charming woman named Teresa and she assured me that they would look into the problem. I loved it when she looked at my account and said my name and the title of the book. It was so nice to hear the title of my book announced over the phone by someone I never met.

Well, I just got word that I just published Phicklephilly, The Book… on Amazon! (for REAL this time. I promise!) And the craziest irony of all is, it was published on Valentine’s Day! How fitting!

The book is available for online purchase currently, in kindle and paperback editions.

Please buy my book. Know the secrets that are coming up in the blog before they happen! Will I find true love in the city of Philadelphia? All will be revealed in the book.

There will be more books.  I believe this could be the beginning of an ongoing series!

Thank you all for reading, commenting, and especially following my odyssey of romance!

Thanks to all of you for your support! (Yes! Finally reached my 2020 goal!)

 

 

Featured

Welcome to Phicklephilly

This blog is about my life here in Philadelphia, people I meet, and the experiences I’ve had with them. I’m a gentleman, but I’ve been told I’m very fickle. My goal is to bring you the best dating and relationship content I can.

I appreciate you reading, liking, commenting, and most of all following my blog. 

I publish every day.

Phicklephilly is now a BOOK! You can buy the incredible true saga of my challenges to find love in the city of Philadelphia.

You can buy it right here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=phicklephilly&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Thank you!

I also have a Language Translator widget. You can enter the language of your choice and it will automatically translate anything I’ve written to the language of your choice instantly! (Gotta love technology! As a guy from the 60’s and 70’s, this is some Sci Fi stuff right here!)

Please check out my Collections tab. There you’ll find a list of all of the great collections of stories that are so fun to read.

Here is a list to get you started!

*** Go to the SEARCH widget on the Homepage and simply enter the name of the series you’re interested in, and off you go!

California Dreamin’

Celebrity Sightings

Crazy Dating Stories

Dating and Relationship Advice

Miscellaneous Stories 

Sun Stories

Tales of Rock

Tinder Moments

Wildwood Daze

I also have several series about all of the people I’ve met here in my 10 years in Philadelphia.

*** Go to the SEARCH widget on the Homepage and simply enter the name of the person and you can read their series!

Annabelle

Cherie

Maria

Michelle

Rebecca

If you’d like, you can just cut and paste the names into the SEARCH widget on the home page and go from there.

If anyone out there knows an easier or a better way to do this please let me know!

Thank you for your continued support!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Listen to Phicklephilly LIVE on Spotify!

Facebook: phicklephilly       Instagram: @phicklephilly       Twitter: @phicklephilly

Tales of Rock – Fountains Of Wayne’s Adam Schlesinger Dies At 52 After Contracting COVID-19

“Oh god, no…”

Adam Schlesinger, one of the most prolific and decorated songwriters of his generation, died Wednesday from complications caused by COVID-19. He was 52.

His death was confirmed to NPR by his lawyer, Josh Grier.

With former songwriting partner Chris Collingwood, Schlesinger enjoyed his greatest commercial success as a musician with Fountains of Wayne, which released five studio albums between 1996 and 2011. In 2003, “Stacy’s Mom” was a hit for the band; that song later helped Fountains of Wayne land a pair of Grammy nominations. But Schlesinger also kept busy outside Fountains of Wayne, even during its commercial peak: He played in Ivy (whose six albums came out more or less concurrently with Fountains’ output), Tinted Windows (a short-lived power-pop project with Taylor Hanson of Hanson, Bun E. Carlos of Cheap Trick and James Iha of The Smashing Pumpkins) and the synth-pop group Fever High. He also produced albums for many other artists.

Schlesinger’s career extended well beyond his work in bands. He had a hand in many of the songs that populated the critically beloved TV series Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, and he won three Emmys — one for Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and two, both with David Javerbaum, for co-writing songs performed in Tony Awards telecasts. With Javerbaum, Schlesinger was nominated for two Tonys (both for 2008’s Cry-Baby) and won a Grammy for A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All!.

A versatile songwriter with a gift for straddling genres and musical eras, Schlesinger wrote frequently for film, with credits ranging from three songs in the romantic comedy Music and Lyrics to the Oscar-nominated title track to Tom Hanks’ 1996 film That Thing You Do!.

Tributes began appearing on Twitter as news of Schlesinger’s death circulated. Javerbaum described Schlesinger as “a brilliant songwriter, musician, collaborator and friend,” adding, “You enriched millions of lives with your boundless creativity, none more than mine.”

David Javerbaum

@davidjaverbaum

Adam, you were a brilliant songwriter, musician, collaborator and friend.

Gorgeous melodies spun out of you like silk through a loom.

You enriched millions of lives with your boundless creativity, none more than mine.

Thank you Adam.

I love you.https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/01/arts/music/adam-schlesinger-dead-coronavirus.html 

Adam Schlesinger performing in 2010 in Manhattan.

Adam Schlesinger, Songwriter for Rock, Film and the Stage, Dies at 52

He made suburban characters shine in Fountains of Wayne songs and brought pop-rock perfection to the Tom Hanks film “That Thing You Do!”

nytimes.com

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

50 of the Most Miserably Unfortunate Names Ever to Bestowed Upon People

Having grown up with a last name that is often mocked for having components of phallic innuendo, I can relate to these poor souls a little bit. Like I can’t even imagine what kind of verbal abuse they went through growing up.

I like to imagine each of them lead lives similar to the Boy Named Sue.

From Ben Dover to Richard Johnson, and every name in between, some parents just didn’t have enough forethought when they were choosing baby names, or they really didn’t care that their kid was going to get bullied constantly. But either way, its the parents’ fault. But if you thought these were bad, you should see how some of these people named their cats.

 

  • 1
    funny names - Face - ARRESTED CRYSTAL METHENY for launching missile at car and not for having a funny name

  • funny name - Facial expression - Mr. Perv's Fifth Grade INS

  • 3
    funny name - Media - Hesk VANESSA TOBACCOJUICE @CBCSask cBc news University student Connect SAMSUNG nerenire

  • 4
    funny name - Hair - Charity Beaver Vote for Charity Name: Charity Beaver Age: 24 Occupation: Personal Trainer Why She's a Finalist: This woman deserves votes for her name alone. On top of that, she's doing her part to help women fit into their skinny jeans. The Archer City native moved to Dallas last year for an internship at Cooper Clinie, and she's managed to make friends and build an impressive clientele in that short time. She divides her time between Cooper, the Dallas Country Club, and Equ

  • 5
    funny name - Hair - FOX 11 KASH REGISTER nyfoxla.com 12:01 60 EXONERATED HE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT FOR PERMISSION TO USE A

  • 6
    funny name - Photo caption - MacDonald-Berger

  • 7
    funny name - Hair - Deja Viau

  • 8
    funny name - Technology - Gay Neighbors Assistant to the Registrar

  • 9
    funny name - News - W DICK SWETT (D) Former Congressman

  • 10
    funny name - Spokesperson - ESr Tokyo Sexwale Ex-Robben Island Prisoner

  • 11
    funny name - Text - Dr. Shit Fun Chew, Undersung Scientist Investigator Eileen Peters alterts us to the fact that Dr. Shit F. Chew-our Undersung Scientist of the Month back in December 2004 and again in February 2010 now lists her complete name on her web site. Her complete name is Dr. Shit Fun Chew. Dr. Chew now becomes our first three-time Undersung Scientist of the Month. Here's a repeat of our 2010 report, when Fun was represented only by the initial F: This month's Undersung Scientist is Dr

  • 12
    funny name - Facial expression - HITLER MUSSOLINI DIR. GERAL DA POLICIA CIVIL DE GOIAS

  • 13
    funny name - Grandparent - ORAL

  • 14
    funny name - Text - INIC y Gay Saylor Jackson Woman's Club President 1952-1953

  • 15
    funny name - News - t NEW POPET ELECTED OLD ELECTION OF THE POPE LIVE DR.JOELLE ROLLO-KOSTER UNIVERSITY OF RHODE ISLAND

  • 16
    funny name - News - ARRESTED Donald Duck SOURCE: STARK COUNTY SHERIFF S11 ACTI NEW 81 19 19Actionft. ER FUN DEALS FOR THE

  • 17
    funny name - Hair - PAUL TWOCOCK Stonewall, Gay rights charity BBC SOUTH EAST TODAY

  • 18
    funny name - Player - REA FRL C BROWNS SOCIALHUSE VISION CLIR DOCTORS OF OPTOEIn arantor bai CATED AT OLD CASINO OUTHOUSE (30

  • 19
    funny name - Poster - CHIG 8 AGOSTO, ORE 21.15, CHIESA DI S.AGOSTINO KIM KASHKASHIAN viola J.S BACH KURTÁG J.S BACH Suite n. 1 in sol magg. BWV 1007 Selezione da Signs, Games and Messages Suite n. 2 in re min. BWV 1008 Suite n. 3 in do magg. BWV 1009 Selezione da Signs, Games and Messages KURTÁG

  • 20
    funny name - Text - BARRY SHITPEAS Also Historian

  • 21
    funny name - Text - 201-ART MR. BUTT

  • 22
    funny name - Face - JIMMY Cherries Waffles Tennis LIVE!

  • 23
    funny name - Text - Offender Detail TYRANNOSAURUS REX MULLENS County: ELKHART Address(es) Home MAP TYRANNOSAURUS REX MULLENS 1701 1/2 MORTON AVE ELKHART, INDIANA 46516 County: ELKHART Male Age: 66 Sex: Race: White Complexion: Light Weight: Hair: Status: ACTIVE 182 lb Height: 5 08 Registration Type: Sex Offender Offender Type: 10-YEAR NOTIFICATION Eye Color: Hazel Gray or Parialy Gray SightSim/Thin Build: Released: 10/08/2004 End Reg. Date: Next Reg. Date: 10/08/2014 Aliases: JAMES E GRANT 09/02/

  • 24
    funny name - Screen - COOKIE FACEY PARENT HD

  • 25
    funny name - Advertising - THEOKI $1000 Weekly Gas Giveaway! Use Any of Our No Surcharge ATMS and You Could Be this Week's Winnert TransFund Sparkle Titsworth Northwest OKC

  • 26
    funny name - Newsreader - Beautiful Existence SEATTLE(YES, THAT IS HER LEGAL NAMEI) 4

  • 27
    funny name - Text - ПОМЬ» DЕРОР THE Dick Burger Appliance Speeialist Fax www.bomedepot.com

  • 28
    funny name - Text - Find Movies, TV shows, Celebrities and more... All IMDb Movies, TV & Showtimes News& Celebs, Events & Photos Watchlist Community SEE RANK Yolanda Squatpump Make Up Department Miscellaneous Crew Music Department Contribute to IMDb. Add a bio, trivia, and more. Update information for Yolanda Squatpump Known For Exig Greggi D Besie PUPPET MASTER Ustal Suspects the Sank nig candy NEAMESIS the silence of Ihe hams Puppet Master II Makeup Department (1990) The Usual Suspects Makeup

  • 29
    funny name - Text - MOE LESTER In loving memory of my husband, who slipped away from us August 11, 2008.

  • 30
    funny name - Child - DIN MARIAND MARCOS Depεν ELEMENTARY SCHOOL S.Y. ESTIOCO, LORD VOL DEMORT R. II VIOLETS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY PLEASE NOTIFY: CNDY RFERNANDEZ OCTTED -E RMANCO RD 8C ANY

  • 31
    funny name - News - Saad Maan tagesschau Sprecher irakische Armee TLEPUNKEN

  • 32
    funny name - Team sport - RED BARONS Steve Sharts Pitcher Scranton-Wilkes Barre Red Barons

  • 33
    funny name - Banner - For Sale REMAX MLS B.J. WORTHY 758-1200 REMAX On Track 409-5605

  • 34
    funny name - Newspaper - B.Ruth Boring July 30, 1924 - April 01, 2016 B. Ruth Boring, time resident of Clanton, Clint" to his friends of ome to be h 30, 2016. g. 29, 1934, as, to Lila Clanton. death by na G. omas J. ving his all six of ers; and er and rvived s (Lin- di A. arbon- y L. ; and .S. U.S. et the egon Grove commur Friday morning, A at the Providence Medical Center in A celebration of held at 2:30 p.m April 9, 2016, at t Rose&Hoyt Funer 2308 Pacific Ave., Grove, with Pasto Giles, retired

  • 35
    funny name - Motor vehicle - WENDY WACKO Your Community Realtor ROYAL LEPAGE 225-5000

  • 36
    funny name - News - Tues JOCK STIRRUP CSPAN Chief of the Defense Staff

  • 37
    funny name - Face - Dick Paradise Dick Paradise is a retired American ice hockey player who played 144 games in the World Hockey Association for the Minnesota Fighting Saints between 1972 and 1974 Wikipedia Y

  • 38
    funny name - Signage - DR. PORNSAK & ROOM CLINIC FOR RENT TR PEnrasion ENDD THAI FOOD NDIAN THAI FOO ATM EXCHAN DILADM

  • 39
    funny name - News - Trustee Justice MIKE WIENER THEA BEAVER VILLAGE ELECTIONS VOTE MARCH 15

  • 40
    funny name - News - Mister Love SEX OFFENDER ARRESTED CHARGED WITH FAILING TO REPORT WLWT.COM

  • 41
    funny name - Text - N175 Mr. Sackrider

  • 42
    funny name - Text - REED COLLEGE Portland, Oregon 97202-819 3203 SE Woodstock Blvd. Sirius Bonner Assistant Dean & Assistant Director of Multicultural Recruitment E OF SION

  • 43
    funny name - Facial hair - Dr. Whet Faartz 1 COMISARIO DE LA EXPOSICION

  • 44
    funny name - Movie - 232 Co-Producer SPEED WEED

  • 45
    funny name - Green - CRYSTAL COKER H&R BLOCK TAX SPECIALIST 3 H&R BLOCK

  • 46
    funny name - News - VOICE OF FOX 13 JANICE KEIHANAIKUKAUAKAHIHULIHEEKAHAUNAELE HAWAII RESIDENT 83 10:53

  • 47
    funny name - News - AMERICA'S ELECTION HEADQUARTER 2016 FOX KRYSTAL BALL WS ACTIVIST&SENIOR FELLOW, NEW LEADERS COUNCIL WE FRI BY GOV ANDREW CUOMO (D) AUTHORIZES FINES OF UP TO $7,5

  • 48
    funny name - Text - Pacific Centre Sam Sung Specialist 701 West Georgia Street Suite G030 Vancouver, BC V7Y 1G6 778 373-1800 www.apple.com/ca/pacificcentre

  • 49
    funny name - Advertising - DICK ASSMAN IS HERE Full Serve SLEEK

  • 50
    funny name - Forehead - (10 CHRISTIAN GUY Centre for Social Justice O min BBCNEWS SAMSUND

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

How to Kiss a Friend Accidentally and Get Away with It

Ever been tempted to kiss a friend? While it’s alright to get attracted to a friend, it’s not always the safest bet to make a move. Find out how to kiss a friend and get away with it!

Kissing a friend is a tempting proposition. But unless it’s a mutual desire, it’s best to stay away from such complications. But if you really do want to get frisky with a pal, here’s your guide on how to kiss a friend, the easy way.

It’s sneaky, but hey, if sexual desire matters more than friendship to you, why not give this a go?

How to kiss a friend

Have you ever tried to kiss a friend? In most cases, it just doesn’t work out.

Your friend may be shocked, surprised, or may want to stay away from you.

But if you really do like a friend and want to take it further down the path of love, then this piece on kissing a friend may not be appropriate for you.

But on the other hand, if you just want know how to kiss a friend, and then worry about your mixed feelings later, this may be the easiest way forward.

There are a few times when you can kiss a friend and get away with it, and a few other times when it’s just completely inappropriate to kiss a friend.

Firstly we’ll get to the five ways by which you could kiss a friend out of the blue, with no preamble or even a hint that you’re attracted to your friend.

#1 Kissing a friend when you’re drunk

This is pretty much the safest way to kiss a friend and get away with it. And let’s face it, more than half the first kisses between friends use this move. When you’re out with this friend you like or at a party, have a few drinks and wait for the booze to kick in. And once you’re feeling the buzz, use that as the perfect accidental excuse. Try and get the coziest spot next to your friend, preferably an isolated spot.

Start a conversation with your friend and eventually start whispering to your friend. Of course, you’re *drunk*, aren’t you? Whispering into each other’s ears is completely acceptable when you’re high!

And at some point of the conversation in between all the close facial contact, go right up and kiss your friend. The kiss may last a while longer if you’ve built a lot of sexual chemistry through all the body contact, but even if your friend’s not drunk, you’d still be able to sneak in a quick kiss. And your friend can’t really get upset or do anything about it, after all, you’re drunk out of your mind!

#2 Playing truth or dare

Kissing a friend doesn’t come easier than this. So if you’re ever trying to figure how to kiss a friend, focus on arranging a drinking game like spin the bottle or truth or dare.

Sometimes, you may get a kiss or a lot more than that. But at other times, you may not always end up lucky and another friend may end up kissing the friend you want to kiss. But not to worry, if you didn’t get a chance to kiss your friend during the game, just get drunk and go back to step #1!

#3 Kiss your friend when they’re consoling you

This is a sneaky move, and it’s another common ploy in getting to kiss a friend. Many people use this, and quite frankly, it works very well.

Have you just lost something of value and need some consoling? Everyone needs a friend they’re down and need consoling. So call the friend you like and tell them how *depressed* you are and how much you’d appreciate it if they could come over to your place to cheer you up.

When your friend comes by to your place, snuggle up and hug your friend. Just stay in that position as you mumble your sorry ass story and explain how depressed you are. At some point, you’d know that your friend’s pretty comfortable with the hug too. Now you can linger your hands on their back or go straight for the kiss. The kiss may last a while, or a few seconds. But if it does last, the kiss could lead both of you into bed and even go a lot further.

On the other hand, if your friend does take offense, you could apologize profusely and tell your friend you didn’t know what came over you. Yeah right, you effing perv!

#4 Accidentally kiss your friend

Now if you want to know the dirt on how to kiss a friend while trying this, you won’t be able to get a big, wet kiss using this move. But on the upside, your friend can never really point their finger at you, or even remotely accuse you.

So you’ve been clubbing recently? You know how hard you have to shout to be heard over the blaring speakers, don’t you? Almost always, two people who want to have a conversation have to stick their faces together to be heard. If you create an opportunity to create a quick successive series of questions and answers, you can move your face across when your friend’s yelling into your ear, and hey, guess what you just did, you kissed your friend!

How to kiss a friend accidentally conversation tip:

You: Hey, I’m going to get a drink, you want one too?!

Friend: Yeah!

You: What?!

Friend: Yeah, I’ll have one too!

You: What do you want to have?!

Friend: A beer!

You: What?!

Friend: A beeer!!

You: Why don’t you have a Hawaiian Volcano?

Friend: A Hawaiian wha….

You: A hawaiian vol… ummh!

Oops!! *Grin*

Now this works well even in a movie theater, and it’s sneaky, isn’t it? And an improvisation of this kiss is when you both are hugging and kissing each other goodbye. Turn your cheek in ever so slightly when your friend’s about to kiss you goodbye, and viola!

#5 How to kiss a friend via text flirting

Now this is a safe way to kiss your friend. It involves a lot of late night texts which eventually lead to sizzling sexual chemistry between both of you. It’s almost always foolproof as long as you take your time and play it cool. Get this easy step right, and you’re definitely going to do a lot more than kiss your friend. Get this wrong, and it’s still safe for you!

Times when you just shouldn’t kiss a friend

Now that you know the best tips on how to kiss a friend sneakily and avoid any complications, perhaps it’s time to know the times when you should never really kiss a friend.

#1 When they’re being touchy feely

Look, friends can be touchy feely or every flirty at times. But that’s just not enough of a reason to kiss a friend. Unless the vibes are just right, don’t kiss your friend just because they’re cuddling up or holding your hands. It’s risky and can cost you your friendship and the intimacy.

#2 When your friend’s asleep

This is an absolute no-no. As tempting as a sleeping friend can look, you just can’t kiss a friend when they’re asleep even if you’re drunk. There’s every chance that your friend may wake up and think you’re an absolute pervert! And your other friends will have the same opinion too.

#3 When your friend’s hung over

This kind of a situation may work in a porno flick and it’s a great fantasy too, but it’s just not something you should ever do. You may be really desperate or may have been looking for an opportunity like this since forever, but just don’t do it. There are far easier ways, so why bother with this. It’s just really perverse, and you just can’t take advantage of a friend who trusts your company.

An opportunity may crop up some other day, but never kiss a friend if you find yourself in such a situation. Respect your friend and yourself, because if you do take advantage of a drunk friend, that makes you no different than a rapist.

#4 When your friend is grieving

Now it’s natural to feel physically and emotionally connected when you’re hugging a grieving friend, but don’t use the closure and take advantage of the situation. If your friend makes the first move, then go right ahead. But if your friend just wants a shoulder to lean on at a difficult time, be there for your friend as a friend, not a lusty buddy.

So the next time you’re wondering how to kiss a friend, look no further. This is as foolproof as it can get, especially when you’re trying to get away with kissing a friend!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Amelia – Chapter 7- Square 1682 – Part 2

So the lady is bending Amelia’s ear and she wants to go.

I get it. I hate the lonely inserters. But I love that Amelia has played her as my daughter.

Because this lonely alienated middle-aged woman that’s inserted herself into my night with Amelia need to learn that you don’t do that.

It rattled Amelia and she really wanted to go. This clown gave Amelia her card and Amelia played the daughter card and left.

Drunk blond was sipping her crown royal and her friend’s not coming down to meet her was doing her thing. I paid my bill and then I saw the impossible.

Amelia had left her phone on the bar.

Oh shit. You guys can’t live with out that any more.

I can’t either.

I paid my bill and told Roman that if Amelia returned, her phone was safe. This crazy woman drove my baby out so hard she left her phone behind. I hate that fat old chick!

I leave Square and run to Suburban Station. I figure maybe I can catch Amelia and get her the phone. I jog/run (smoking a cigarette) north on 17th street to the subway entrance.

It’s filled with usual homeless detritus asking for money, but I blaze past them because I must find Amelia.

I land in Suburban station. It is eerily empty. No people, just homeless and cops.

Fuck!

Where is Amelia and what train is she on? I’ll go to the Septa office.

I roll in and tell Brian and Atheya my dilemma. They’re great, and Brian gets on the loudspeaker and makes and announcement throughout all of Suburban Station.

“Amelia Eckhart! Please come to the Septa main office!”

I figure this will work.

It won’t.

We go again, and I get to know Brian and Athene even better now, but nothing we do yields Amelia.”

“Dude I appreciate you going twice with the announcement, but what if she takes the Broad Street Line?”

“That’s outside our voice”

I loved that this pony-tailed clerk articulated that so elegantly.

I texted Roman that if she came back to text me.

I was panicked and sad for my co worker

I texted Eileen to help me on social media.

I care about Amelia. I don’t want her scared about her phone. I know we can’t live without it anymore but I have to look after my friend.

I don’t want her to be scared.

I give up.

I’m walking home.

I’m two blocks from my house when I get the text from Roman…

She’s here.

“I’m om my way”

I scamper through Rittenhouse and back to Square.

Amelia is sitting at the bar, and scary woman is long gone.

I clap Amelia’s phone down in front of her on the bar.

I’m happy to see her.

I get another Chardonnay as a gift.

Amelia tells me she was on the train at 11th street when she realized she lost her phone.

Baby jumped off and came back.

I was so worried about her. My Amelia. I’m really glad it all worked out.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Social Distancing Pick-Up Lines Have Arrived & They’re The Comic Relief You Needed

Finding love in the time of coronavirus may be difficult, but the internet certainly isn’t letting that stop it. Amidst growing numbers of COVID-19 lockdowns and CDC-recommended social distancing, it was only a matter of time before #SocialDistancingPickUpLines started trending on Twitter. If you’re looking for a way to stay salacious but sanitary, let these tweets be your guide.

Though we’re all practicing social distancing — you’re doing that right? Staying home or at least six-feet from other people? Good, just checking — we can still keep it sexy from afar. There’s sexting, sexy video chatting, phone sex, foot pics, toe pics, sending nudes, sliding into someone’s DMs, self-isolating but as a euphemism, and, of course, Facebook pokes.

Yes, you can still poke someone on Facebook. Now, more than ever, we need to bring back the strange and stupid practice of clicking a button that notifies another person “you have been poked.” Is poking any less creepy while the coronavirus pandemic is going on? Who knows! Maybe! Probably. You’ll just have to find out. Poke your COVID-19 crush. It’ll be a cute story to tell the grandkids.

Or you could just try one of these 20 #SocialDistancingPickUpLines.

1. Notting Hill Part 2: Let’s Not Get COVID-19

Hollywood Exposed@AndstuffL

“I’m just a girl, standing 6 feet away from a boy. Asking him to maybe move back another foot. Thanks.” #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

View image on Twitter
2,027 people are talking about this

Dibs on being Julia Roberts.

2. Will You Be My Quarantine?

Vixera@carpe_flamma

Are you a pandemic because you’ve got my heart on lockdown
#SocialDistancingPickUpLines

1,334 people are talking about this

Word play, especially during a pandemic, is welcome.

3. Six-feet, Please.

Sentient Bunny Suit🐰@SentientSuit

I saw you from across the bar. Stay there. #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

715 people are talking about this

Don’t you dare move.

4. Remix Of An Old Classic

Not Will Ferrell@itsWillyFerrell

You can’t spell quarantine without “u r a q t” #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

1,113 people are talking about this

Time to brush up on those AIM skills.

5. Funny Because It’s True

Jill in Virusland@Jillinvirusland

“If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you, I’d be in the highest tax bracket and then I’d be able to get tested for coronavirus.” #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

485 people are talking about this

Raya has left the chat.

6. Team Keep The Alphabet The Same

Joy Eilene@joyeilene

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d keep U and I exactly where they are, with eleven letters of longing between them. #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

229 people are talking about this

AEIOU and sometimes Y don’t you stay away from me.

7. The Greatest Of All Love Stories

🍒Acidic Blonde™️@Acidic_Blonde

Wanna make plans that we have to cancel? #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

210 people are talking about this

Honestly? A good pickup line at any time.

8. Don’t You Dare Hold It Against Me

John C. B.@CatBirder27

#SocialDistancingPickUpLines if I told you that you had a nice body, would you keep it six feet away from me?

124 people are talking about this

Britney Spears, we need a remix.

9. The Only Thing I’ll Be Taking Out For A While

Anthony Jimenez@antyabstract

I’ll have what she’s having!

for delivery

and please leave it at my doorstep thank you so much #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

See Anthony Jimenez’s other Tweets

Extra wet wipes, too, thanks.

10. A Pickup Line To Let Them Know You’re Literate

Jill in Virusland@Jillinvirusland

“Since all the public libraries are closed, I’m checking you out instead.” #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

325 people are talking about this

Reading is sexy.

11. Girl Next Door Vibes

Joy Eilene@joyeilene

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past your house on the other side of the street again? #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

See Joy Eilene’s other Tweets

I literally have nothing better to do than pace around my block.

12. An Amended Chorus To The Adele Song

Jeff Dwoskin

@bigmacher

Hellooooo
I said hello
I’m not sure I can scream any louder
Never mind
#SocialDistancingPickUpLines

65 people are talking about this

I was wondering if after all these years you’d like to… have a conversation over FaceTime?

13. Wink Wink

Vlada R@Vlada_Ruggiero

Hey baby, I got some rubbers we can use… on our hands… they’re gloves. So we don’t have to touch anything #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

Embedded video

Always use protection.

14. *dances to Jamiroquai*

Levi the Totally Not Extinct Dinosaur@levi_bullen

I saw you liked and retweeted my tweet, so this is getting pretty serious huh? #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

Embedded video

308 people are talking about this

Don’t be jealous because I’ve been chatting online with babes all day.

15. The Bar Is So, So Low

Zvjezdan Patz@zvjezdanpatz

I wash my hands when there’s no pandemic too #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

364 people are talking about this

You better be washing your hands.

16. It’s Truly Our Only Option

Michael@Sckswithsandals

FaceTime and chill? #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

217 people are talking about this

Could I interest you in a romantic Zoom meeting?

17. We Stan A TP King

Roman Phoenix@RomanPhoenix4

Baby, do you need toilet paper? Because I can be your Prince Charmin. #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

Embedded video

1,147 people are talking about this

Better than a bouquet of flowers.

18. Say Anything… But At A Reasonable Distance

Ryan Cappo@RyanCappo

I will stand in front of your house with my emergency radio from the 80’s until you are out of quarantine, babe.#SocialDistancingPickUpLines

View image on Twitter
91 people are talking about this

I love you (staying six feet from me). How many more times do I have to say it?

19. I Repeat, The Bar Is So, So Low

Mr. Bagels@fartbagels

I have toilet paper #SocialDistancingPickUpLines

434 people are talking about this

If you have hand sanitizer, I will put a ring on it immediately.

20. Can’t Tell If I’m Terrified Or Turned On

Leanne Sandusky@LeanneSandusky

If covid-19 doesn’t take you out.. can I? #SocialDistancingPickUpLines #stolenfromsomewhere

703 people are talking about this

Honestly, at this point, perhaps a simple heart emoji and virus emoji will woo them.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Women Dating After 50: Is It Worth The Effort?

How often have you heard about women dating after 50? Do you know that over 50s dating can be just as fun and exciting as it is in your twenties?

Are you part of the crowd and wondering if it’s worth the effort? Granted, it does take effort to look your best especially if you are worried about how attractive you are at this age. And, it takes effort to meet good men.

Here’s the thing. If you like being the oddball out at a dinner party, taking yourself for a drive on a beautiful Sunday afternoon and spending Saturday night alone with a quart of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream than it is not worth the effort.

But the reality is most divorced women don’t like the ‘live alone’ lifestyle.

Let’s face it human beings are social animals and most women over fifty would at least like to spend their social time with a male companion and even better would be in a healthy committed relationship.

Lucky for you in today’s world people in their 50’s are now the fastest-growing demographic in the United States, which in and of itself makes it worth your time and energy. Being in a relationship as you head toward retirement years is a very positive way to live your life. Men and women in relationship have fewer health problems than single people.

Depression or the anxiety of dealing with today’s demands are far less if you are in a good relationship.

Having someone that cares about your well-being and happiness as well as you caring about his is a wonderful experience to have each day.

I realize that when you go through a divorce you often think… I’m better off alone. Or you may think I don’t want to take the risk of ending up with some jerk again. However, what you want to remember is today you are a very different woman from who you were when you met your ex 25 or 30 plus years ago.

You’ve paid your dues so to speak and today you are a much wiser woman then you were in your 20’s. A common mistake that women after 50 often make is not to acknowledge who they are today and how far they have come.

Remember the ad “You’ve come a long way baby!”?

Well, that’s true.

I want to encourage you to acknowledge all the life lessons you have learned and all the experiences you have had, that make you the strong and capable woman you are today.

You need to stop thinking about your age, or your horrible divorce or the extra 10 pounds you can’t get rid of. The only things you need to change are your negative thinking around the idea of dating again and turn it into a positive attitude about moving on in your life.

Actually, it is very cool to be a part of the group of women after 50 in today’s world.

In your Grandmothers or even your Mother’s time, this was not considered something a woman could do. In those days a woman was destined to live the rest of her life alone.

To celebrate the fact that you are healthy and free to find your ideal partner to share this stage of your life with.

So, Women dating after 50 is indeed worth the effort.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Amelia – Chapter 6 – Square 1682 – Part 1

So the last few Mondays Amelia and I have been getting killed at the salon and finding repose at Square 1682 pounding drinks. Roman’s on point, plying us with whiskey and chardonnay for a $5.50 check. (See: Roman – Rock n’ Roll Bartender)

He’s always tipped handsomely to match his face. It’s the perfect place for me to drink.

Amelia loves it, because it gives us a night to decompress and get free drinks. I’m happy that for the first time I can hang with my staff.

We’re hanging at the bar and doing our thing, but some older woman starts to talk to Amelia.

This blonde is middle aged and puffy, and waiting to meet her friends upstairs at the hotel. They’re clearly not coming down to meet her and she,s about to attach herself to Amelia.

She’s plowing four fingers of Crown Club in a rock glass.

She somehow inserts herself into our conversation like any lonely drunk.

She attacks Amelia with all of her tales of wind sailing and her activities and kids. It’s like an awful Tinder profile come to life.

I feel for my comrade who’s being very nice because she’s awesome.

This Michelin man in a dress is awful. She’s going on about how she hates young women who are in shape. (Amelia) How she hates how men don’t understand her or how we can lose weight faster than women.

It’s an awful insertion, and the poor lonely middle-aged woman doesn’t know she’s invaded my time with my friend and coworker. I sit quietly and think this is the thing that destroyed her marriage

This is why she’s alone, but I still feel sad for her, as annoying as she is stealing my time with Amelia.

Amelia in the meantime has created a story with this woman that she is my daughter and that I’m her dad.

I find this out about half way between the exchange.

I love exotic fiction and role playing, and admire my coworker for coming up with a creative situation.

Eileen is a cute child. But Amelia is an elegant friend. I understand clearly from 40 years of being in corporate life, but I feel so close to Amelia.

Not the older man preying upon the young girl.

Nothing like that.

I work with her everyday. I look forward to seeing her when Monday arrives. Amelia has a certain magic that radiates her from her every day.

We reveal everything that’s going with us with our romantic lives and it’s just easy and automatic.

It always feels safe, and there’s no judgement. I know Amelia and admire who she is and I feel safe in who I am with her.

I never expected this.

I never expected that it would feel this much fun!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly