March 2020 – Phicklephilly

Social Distancing Pick-Up Lines Have Arrived & They’re The Comic Relief You Needed

Finding love in the time of coronavirus may be difficult, but the internet certainly isn’t letting that stop it. Amidst growing numbers of COVID-19 lockdowns and CDC-recommended social distancing, it was only a matter of time before #SocialDistancingPickUpLines started trending on Twitter. If you’re looking for a way to stay salacious but sanitary, let these tweets be your guide.

Though we’re all practicing social distancing — you’re doing that right? Staying home or at least six-feet from other people? Good, just checking — we can still keep it sexy from afar. There’s sexting, sexy video chatting, phone sex, foot pics, toe pics, sending nudes, sliding into someone’s DMs, self-isolating but as a euphemism, and, of course, Facebook pokes.

Yes, you can still poke someone on Facebook. Now, more than ever, we need to bring back the strange and stupid practice of clicking a button that notifies another person “you have been poked.” Is poking any less creepy while the coronavirus pandemic is going on? Who knows! Maybe! Probably. You’ll just have to find out. Poke your COVID-19 crush. It’ll be a cute story to tell the grandkids.

Or you could just try one of these 20 #SocialDistancingPickUpLines.

1. Notting Hill Part 2: Let’s Not Get COVID-19

Dibs on being Julia Roberts.

2. Will You Be My Quarantine?

Word play, especially during a pandemic, is welcome.

3. Six-feet, Please.

Don’t you dare move.

4. Remix Of An Old Classic

Time to brush up on those AIM skills.

5. Funny Because It’s True

Raya has left the chat.

6. Team Keep The Alphabet The Same

AEIOU and sometimes Y don’t you stay away from me.

7. The Greatest Of All Love Stories

Honestly? A good pickup line at any time.

8. Don’t You Dare Hold It Against Me

Britney Spears, we need a remix.

9. The Only Thing I’ll Be Taking Out For A While

Extra wet wipes, too, thanks.

10. A Pickup Line To Let Them Know You’re Literate

Reading is sexy.

11. Girl Next Door Vibes

I literally have nothing better to do than pace around my block.

12. An Amended Chorus To The Adele Song

I was wondering if after all these years you’d like to… have a conversation over FaceTime?

13. Wink Wink

Always use protection.

14. dances to Jamiroquai

Don’t be jealous because I’ve been chatting online with babes all day.

15. The Bar Is So, So Low

You better be washing your hands.

16. It’s Truly Our Only Option

Could I interest you in a romantic Zoom meeting?

17. We Stan A TP King

Better than a bouquet of flowers.

18. Say Anything… But At A Reasonable Distance

I love you (staying six feet from me). How many more times do I have to say it?

19. I Repeat, The Bar Is So, So Low

If you have hand sanitizer, I will put a ring on it immediately.

20. Can’t Tell If I’m Terrified Or Turned On

Honestly, at this point, perhaps a simple heart emoji and virus emoji will woo them.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Women Dating After 50: Is It Worth The Effort?

How often have you heard about women dating after 50? Do you know that over 50s dating can be just as fun and exciting as it is in your twenties?

Are you part of the crowd and wondering if it’s worth the effort? Granted, it does take effort to look your best especially if you are worried about how attractive you are at this age. And, it takes effort to meet good men.

Here’s the thing. If you like being the oddball out at a dinner party, taking yourself for a drive on a beautiful Sunday afternoon and spending Saturday night alone with a quart of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream than it is not worth the effort.

But the reality is most divorced women don’t like the ‘live alone’ lifestyle.

Let’s face it human beings are social animals and most women over fifty would at least like to spend their social time with a male companion and even better would be in a healthy committed relationship.

Lucky for you in today’s world people in their 50’s are now the fastest-growing demographic in the United States, which in and of itself makes it worth your time and energy. Being in a relationship as you head toward retirement years is a very positive way to live your life. Men and women in relationship have fewer health problems than single people.

Depression or the anxiety of dealing with today’s demands are far less if you are in a good relationship.

Having someone that cares about your well-being and happiness as well as you caring about his is a wonderful experience to have each day.

I realize that when you go through a divorce you often think… I’m better off alone. Or you may think I don’t want to take the risk of ending up with some jerk again. However, what you want to remember is today you are a very different woman from who you were when you met your ex 25 or 30 plus years ago.

You’ve paid your dues so to speak and today you are a much wiser woman then you were in your 20’s. A common mistake that women after 50 often make is not to acknowledge who they are today and how far they have come.

Remember the ad “You’ve come a long way baby!”?

Well, that’s true.

I want to encourage you to acknowledge all the life lessons you have learned and all the experiences you have had, that make you the strong and capable woman you are today.

You need to stop thinking about your age, or your horrible divorce or the extra 10 pounds you can’t get rid of. The only things you need to change are your negative thinking around the idea of dating again and turn it into a positive attitude about moving on in your life.

Actually, it is very cool to be a part of the group of women after 50 in today’s world.

In your Grandmothers or even your Mother’s time, this was not considered something a woman could do. In those days a woman was destined to live the rest of her life alone.

To celebrate the fact that you are healthy and free to find your ideal partner to share this stage of your life with.

So, Women dating after 50 is indeed worth the effort.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Amelia – Chapter 6 – Square 1682 – Part 1

So the last few Mondays Amelia and I have been getting killed at the salon and finding repose at Square 1682 pounding drinks. Roman’s on point, plying us with whiskey and chardonnay for a $5.50 check. (See: Roman – Rock n’ Roll Bartender)

He’s always tipped handsomely to match his face. It’s the perfect place for me to drink.

Amelia loves it, because it gives us a night to decompress and get free drinks. I’m happy that for the first time I can hang with my staff.

We’re hanging at the bar and doing our thing, but some older woman starts to talk to Amelia.

This blonde is middle aged and puffy, and waiting to meet her friends upstairs at the hotel. They’re clearly not coming down to meet her and she,s about to attach herself to Amelia.

She’s plowing four fingers of Crown Club in a rock glass.

She somehow inserts herself into our conversation like any lonely drunk.

She attacks Amelia with all of her tales of wind sailing and her activities and kids. It’s like an awful Tinder profile come to life.

I feel for my comrade who’s being very nice because she’s awesome.

This Michelin man in a dress is awful. She’s going on about how she hates young women who are in shape. (Amelia) How she hates how men don’t understand her or how we can lose weight faster than women.

It’s an awful insertion, and the poor lonely middle-aged woman doesn’t know she’s invaded my time with my friend and coworker. I sit quietly and think this is the thing that destroyed her marriage

This is why she’s alone, but I still feel sad for her, as annoying as she is stealing my time with Amelia.

Amelia in the meantime has created a story with this woman that she is my daughter and that I’m her dad.

I find this out about half way between the exchange.

I love exotic fiction and role playing, and admire my coworker for coming up with a creative situation.

Eileen is a cute child. But Amelia is an elegant friend. I understand clearly from 40 years of being in corporate life, but I feel so close to Amelia.

Not the older man preying upon the young girl.

Nothing like that.

I work with her everyday. I look forward to seeing her when Monday arrives. Amelia has a certain magic that radiates her from her every day.

We reveal everything that’s going with us with our romantic lives and it’s just easy and automatic.

It always feels safe, and there’s no judgement. I know Amelia and admire who she is and I feel safe in who I am with her.

I never expected this.

I never expected that it would feel this much fun!

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

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What is ‘Morning Wood,’ and Why Does it Happen?

Nocturnal penile tumescence (NPT) is not a result of sexual arousal or having a dream relating to sex. Instead, it is a normal function of the male reproductive system.

In fact, regular episodes of NPT are a sign that the nerves and blood supply to the penis are healthy.

If a male does not have NPT regularly, it can indicate a health issue, such as erectile dysfunction (ED), which involves having trouble getting or keeping an erection. Not having regular NPT can also suggest other problems with the nerves or the blood supply to the male reproductive organs.

A hormonal imbalance, such as a decrease in testosterone, can also affect how often a person experiences NPT. A lack of regular NPT can sometimes result from not getting quality sleep.

As a person gets older, they can expect to experience NPT less often. This change should happen gradually, as hormone levels shift. Anyone who notices a sudden drop in the number of their NPT episodes should speak with a doctor to rule out any potential health issues.

Causes

“Morning wood” is a common occurrence for most men.

NPT is not a typical erection because it is not related to sexual thoughts, dreams, or stimulation. It is simply a result of sleep cycles, combined with healthy nerves and blood flow in the body.

NPT tends to happen when a person is in a rapid eye movement (REM) phase of sleep. REM sleep can occur several times during an 8-hour sleep cycle. The erection may go away on its own as a person enters deeper sleep. Thus, a person may have erections several times during the night but may not be aware of them.

Often, a person wakes up at the end of a REM sleep cycle, which explains why NPT seems to happen in the morning. In addition, testosterone levels tend to be elevated in the morning. Males have high levels of this hormone, which contributes to sexual function.

An erection caused by NPT may be physically different from one caused by arousal. One study found that some men experienced pain when they had NPT, but not when they had typical erections.

How often should morning wood occur?

Males of various ages, from children to older adults, experience NPT. Usually, younger adults, who have the highest levels of testosterone, will experience nocturnal erections more frequently than children or older people. Young adult males may have NPT every morning and a few times during the night.

The peak of sexual maturity generally happens when males are in their late teens to late 30s, and this may correspond with higher testosterone levels. It is normal for people in this age range to experience frequent episodes of NPT.

As a person approaches their 40s and 50s, they may notice fewer episodes of NPT. This often occurs because testosterone levels are naturally declining. However, the episodes should decline gradually, not suddenly. A gradual decline in NPT with age is customary.

A hormonal imbalance, especially one that affects the penis and testes, can result in few or no episodes of NPT. This is one reason why having regular erections in the morning is an important indicator of healthy male sexual organs.

One study found that men with hypogonadism, which prevents the sexual organs from fully functioning, experienced an increase in NPT after they had received testosterone therapy.

Some research says that a person’s quality of sleep can affect the frequency of NPT. If a person is not getting good sleep and entering the REM cycle, they may not experience nocturnal erections.

A study of 61 men with obstructive sleep apnea and ED found that getting better quality sleep resulted in more frequent NPT. The participants who used continuous positive airway pressure devices had more frequent nocturnal erections than those who did not.

Other studies have used NPT as an indicator of hormonal or sexual health, especially when treating ED.

For instance, if a person has NPT but cannot get or maintain an erection during sexual activity, doctors can rule out issues such as insufficient blood flow or nerve responses in the penis. If this is the case, ED may be a psychological issue, and a health professional can treat it accordingly.

However, if a person has no nocturnal erections and has trouble getting or keeping erections related to sex, doctors may determine that there is a physical cause of ED.

When to see a doctor

A person should speak to a doctor if they notice changes in how frequently NPT occurs.

Because NPT is an indicator of quality sleep and the health of sexual organs, it is helpful to pay attention to how often NPT happens.

If NPT suddenly stops or is happening much less frequently, speak with a doctor. They may wish to discuss possible health conditions, such as sleep disorders, hormonal imbalances, anxiety, and ED.

It is important to see a doctor about a lack of NPT, as it can be a symptom of ED. This condition can indicate serious health issues, such as heart disease, high blood pressure, or diabetes, especially in younger males. A health professional can help treat these conditions, including ED.

Certain medications, such as antidepressants, can make it more difficult for a person to get or maintain an erection. They may also cause a decrease or sudden stop in NPT. Some of these medications include:

high blood pressure medications
muscle relaxers
hormonal medications
seizure medications
antidepressants
histamine H2 agonists (which can help treat some types of ulcers)
chemotherapy drugs
medications to treat heart arrhythmias
diuretics

If a person has recently started a new medication and notices changes in the frequency of NPT, they may wish to speak with their doctor. Sometimes, the doctor can prescribe a different medication to help address this side effect.

See a doctor if NPT or erections in general are painful.

Seek emergency medical help for an erection that does not go away after 4 hours. If this occurs, it can cause tissue damage in the penis and problems with sexual function.

Summary

Morning wood is a healthy function of the male body.

A person should talk with their doctor if they notice a sudden change in the frequency of nighttime erections. This can ensure that a person receives prompt treatment for any underlying health conditions.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Five Things to Talk About on a First Date

Ah, the first date. Could anything be more exciting? Or perhaps maybe even a little nerve racking? Almost everyone is nervous upon meeting a stranger for the first time so if you feel the tickle of butterflies in your stomach or perhaps knots, do not despair this is only natural. Making a good impression on the first day is of the utmost importance. As important as it is to look your best and be well groomed, it is equally important to be equipped with what you will say on the date. A lot of factors play into whether or not a first date will go well. Spilling your guts out on the first date can overwhelm the other person.

On the first date it’s important to keep the conversation interesting but also light and fun. Talking about the wrong topics could butcher a first date. It is important to have at minimum a mental list of questions and topics to bring up that are safe to talk about. You don’t want to arrive on a first date looking sharp but also be at a loss for words for the duration of it. Luckily, here is my go-to list of the top 5 Things to talk About on a First Date that will ensure that you get that second date.

1. What is a surprising fact about yourself?
Asking this question will provoke your date to open up without having to dig deep for their answer. It will also help to get some of that initial awkwardness to subside. This question will also prevent the conversation from dragging and becoming dull. They might share a special talent they have or a unique hobby. They might have an embarrassing habit or interest. They might be able to wiggle their ears. Maybe they collect dead bugs or play an unusual instrument? You will never know unless you ask. This question will promote closeness without asking something too personal. It is a good safe question you can use especially if you run out of things to say because you can most likely get away with asking it at any point during the date. After the two of you share the surprising facts about yourselves hopefully a natural chemistry will begin to flow between you.

2. What is something you are passionate about?
It’s important to ask this question on a first date. Having a few things in common with someone certainly does not mean that the two of you are a perfect match. However, sharing a common interest with someone does tend to make the first date go smoother. It will give you a chance to talk about something you are highly knowledgeable or at least passionate about. It will give both of you the chance to relax and talk about your passions with ease. What better way to get to know someone than to watch someone’s eyes light up while you listen to them chatter with enthusiasm about their passions. It also might give you an idea for an activity for a second date. If a hobby or interest is shared between the two of you there is a chance you might want to do that activity together. Or perhaps they have a hobby that you have not yet tried but are interested in. This will give them the opportunity to teach you and you the opportunity to learn something new. It could very well create a bonding experience between the two of you.
3. What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?

If there was ever a question that would shake those first date jitters, it would be this one. I really love this question because it will cause the other person to open up and reveal a part of their genuine self and unravel any false fabrications they may have been using as a front. Every single person has at least a few embarrassing stories and while I’m sure we would all like them to stay buried, it’s an integral step in the process of opening up to someone. Being open and truthful is important even on a first date because trust is built on a foundation of honesty. Being dishonest on a first date will lay the groundwork for a rocky relationship if one is ever to develop. This question will cause both of you to expose a more vulnerable side of yourself, all while sharing a chuckle or two.
4. What are you most afraid of?
This is an interesting question. I think it is an important question because it is one that is not typically asked on a first date or first encounter. It’s a question that might lead to other interesting questions. It will force the conversation to delve a little deeper. While you can’t possibly know someone completely on a first date, this might allow you to catch a glimpse of a person’s real self. Some people have ordinary fears such as snakes, spiders or heights. Others might have a fear that might be considered more unusual such as clowns, drowning or mice. It’s interesting to hear what a person is afraid of and the stories behind the fears that they may use to justify them.

5. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
If you ever run out of things to say, talking about your past travels or dream vacation spots might be a way to get the conversation back on track. The world is wide and beautiful. Who doesn’t dream about going out and seeing it? The destinations that your date selects will also tell you valuable information about their personality. Does their dream destination involve a daring adventure or an athletic activity? Or does it involve a relaxing day at the beach with a cold drink? Knowing if your date is laid back and calm or outgoing and energetic will reveal whether or not the two of you will be compatible in the long run.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly Facebook: phicklephilly Twitter: @phicklephilly

Rebecca – Chapter 16 – Reprise

“I never want to retire. I’m not a workaholic, but I love to be busy. I want to have something to do every day for the rest of my life until my sister Janice pats me in the face with a shovel.”

Please go back and read: (Rebecca – Dark Wings of Destiny – Chapters 1 through 14) to fully understand the history I have with this person.

Present Day

Just when I thought everything had gone to shit with Cherie, I get a text.

It’s Rebecca.

I haven’t heard from her in over two years. I don’t even know what she’s been doing. I thought she was gone forever.

So much has changed in my life since meeting Rebecca. I’ve been on a million dates, I’ve changed jobs, I’ve had a sort of girlfriend for over a year and a half. That’s what it is and has been well documented here.

Cherie and I are teetering between love and loss. I’m fine with whatever way it goes, but it would be nice to retain the passion we once had. I think Cherie wants that and so do I, but our schedules are killing us both.

Cherie’s 40 miles away, super busy and so am I, but when we’re together it sings. But lately it’s been really difficult. Cherie’s texts tell me so.

Her life, the distance, her son, her family, her jobs, school, finals, graduation, and beyond.

We’re in two different worlds right now.

Well, we’ve always been in two different worlds.

Cherie’s a 28-year-old attractive, smart, girl faced with the reality of growing up and going forward in her life.

I’m a middle-aged guy who’s realized that corporate america and sitting in a cubicle is bullshit and would rather work two jobs really hard than work one he hated. I love my life at the salon and the restaurant. I’ve found the happy balance.

My daughter Lorelei works right down the street. It’s great. There’s harmony in that.

But when I got the text from Rebecca it threw me for a loop.

I really like Rebecca and she’s always been flighty, but I always loved her company. I know she was trying to find her way in this world and I was always there for her, like I’ve been for all of my friends… but Rebecca was different.

I kind of loved Rebecca.

I would say in a “phicklephilly way” but I think there’s something more than that here. I know it seems crazy. Rebecca’s 24 years old, but if you’ve read the previous Rebecca posts, I always felt a connection to her.

I’ve never been after her. I’m not after anybody.

They always come to me.

But Rebecca has always had a certain pull that the other ones don’t possess. Rebecca haunts me when she’s gone, but I never feel that depressing loss I have with the others. Maybe because the others are just a dopamine drop and I miss the rush of their beauty once it’s gone, but I’m relieved because they were trouble.

Rebecca was never any of those things.

Rebecca was always herself. Honest. Vulnerable. Beautiful.

She thought enough of me to spend time with me.

I’ve lived a charmed life. I really have. I’ve survived on my charm, sense of humor and skills.

Nothing more.

At my age, I’m delighted at my life. I know so many men my age that are lost and confused. It’s so sad.

I love knowing exactly who I am at my age and what I want. After half a century on the planet I finally got it right and it feels joyous.

I never want to retire. I’m not a workaholic, but I love to be busy. I want to have something to do every day for the rest of my life until my sister Janice pats me in the face with a shovel.

My life is rich in experience and memories. I can wrap myself up in them every night like a warm blanket. It’s really lovely after 50 years of anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.

I’ve rebuilt my broken self into an elegant old analog machine that runs so well in the digital age. I work with young people. I love that I can inspire them with my experience just like my dad did when he was my age.

I’m grateful that everyday I get to wake up again, and nothing hurts, and everything’s working. (everything!) The sun is shining and I look forward to the day.

For years I was mired in corporate life. Wearing a suit and tie, going to meetings, working for assholes who couldn’t do what I could do, but were only there because they had no where else to go.

All a joke.

I want to work.

My sister Janice says, “Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.”

She, like my father is only quoting because they’re not the best in original thought, but yes! She’s right, or whoever wrote that bit.

So here I am, in a relationship that’s been distant but’s still alive. For me this has been a great relationship, because unlike all of my other relationships, this one actually met my perfect relationship model.

I know I’ll feel some backlash on this, but it’s been perfect for me.

All of my other relationships have been traditional. Boyfriend/girlfriend. Living together, and moving towards a destination I’ve already experienced and been killed in virtual immolation, and hundreds of thousands of dollars in child support.

I’m never getting married again. Definitely not having any more kids.

My last three relationships have been with younger women and I know how this looks. I did not pursue these wonderful ladies. It just happened.

But the definition of crazy is, doing the same thing over and over hoping you get a different result.

That’s not me, but, my last handful of girlfriends have been young and beautiful.

The ends were inevitable.

They were all doomed before they began, but they were all wonderful. Thank you one and all, girls!

So here I am at a precipice with Cherie, who is the sweetest woman in the world and whom I love very much, and the prospect that she could shit-can me any day now, simply out of not having any time to see me.

We’re amazing when we’re together and I absolutely adore her. I should probably go to her graduation on Friday, but I know I won’t because I hate getting up early anymore and I don’t really want to deal with the whole event in general.

I probably should go.

It would mean the world to her.

Do I really want to meet her family?

She’s worked so hard for so many years. This could be the thing that fixes us.

I really don’t want to go, but I don’t want Cherie gone from my life.

Ahhh… what should I do loyal readers?

I reluctantly texted Rebecca back.

“Hey. It’s been a minute. I feel like we kind of left it all hanging. Hope you’re doing well.”

A day passed…

“Charles…. I miss you. I’m sorry I’ve been out of touch. Been busy with work and life. Up and down. Can you meet for a drink?”

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly Facebook: phicklephilly Twitter: @phicklephilly

Rebecca – Chapter 15 – Reprise

“I never want to retire. I’m not a workaholic, but I love to be busy. I want to have something to do every day for the rest of my life until my sister Janice pats me in the face with a shovel.”

Please go back and read: (Rebecca – Dark Wings of Destiny – Chapters 1 through 14) to fully understand the history I have with this person.

Present Day

Just when I thought everything had gone to shit with Cherie, I get a text.

It’s Rebecca.

I haven’t heard from her in over two years. I don’t even know what she’s been doing. I thought she was gone forever.

Cherie’s 40 miles away, super busy and so am I, but when we’re together it sings. But lately it’s been really difficult. Cherie’s texts tell me so.

Her life, the distance, her son, her family, her jobs, school, finals, graduation, and beyond.

We’re in two different worlds right now.

Well, we’ve always been in two different worlds.

Cherie’s a 28-year-old attractive, smart, girl faced with the reality of growing up and going forward in her life.

My daughter Lorelei works right down the street. It’s great. There’s harmony in that.

But when I got the text from Rebecca it threw me for a loop.

I kind of loved Rebecca.

I’ve never been after her. I’m not after anybody.

They always come to me.

Rebecca was never any of those things.

Rebecca was always herself. Honest. Vulnerable. Beautiful.

She thought enough of me to spend time with me.

I’ve lived a charmed life. I really have. I’ve survived on my charm, sense of humor and skills.

Nothing more.

At my age, I’m delighted at my life. I know so many men my age that are lost and confused. It’s so sad.

I love knowing exactly who I am at my age and what I want. After half a century on the planet I finally got it right and it feels joyous.

I never want to retire. I’m not a workaholic, but I love to be busy. I want to have something to do every day for the rest of my life until my sister Janice pats me in the face with a shovel.

My life is rich in experience and memories. I can wrap myself up in them every night like a warm blanket. It’s really lovely after 50 years of anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.

I’m grateful that everyday I get to wake up again, and nothing hurts, and everything’s working. (everything!) The sun is shining and I look forward to the day.

For years I was mired in corporate life. Wearing a suit and tie, going to meetings, working for assholes who couldn’t do what I could do, but were only there because they had no where else to go.

All a joke.

I want to work.

My sister Janice says, “Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.”

She, like my father is only quoting because they’re not the best in original thought, but yes! She’s right, or whoever wrote that bit.

I know I’ll feel some backlash on this, but it’s been perfect for me.

I’m never getting married again. Definitely not having any more kids.

My last three relationships have been with younger women and I know how this looks. I did not pursue these wonderful ladies. It just happened.

But the definition of crazy is, doing the same thing over and over hoping you get a different result.

That’s not me, but, my last handful of girlfriends have been young and beautiful.

The ends were inevitable.

They were all doomed before they began, but they were all wonderful. Thank you one and all, girls!

I probably should go.

It would mean the world to her.

Do I really want to meet her family?

She’s worked so hard for so many years. This could be the thing that fixes us.

I really don’t want to go, but I don’t want Cherie gone from my life.

Ahhh… what should I do loyal readers?

I reluctantly texted Rebecca back.

“Hey. It’s been a minute. I feel like we kind of left it all hanging. Hope you’re doing well.”

A day passed…

“Charles…. I miss you. I’m sorry I’ve been out of touch. Been busy with work and life. Up and down. Can you meet for a drink?”

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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10 Reasons Why Saying ‘I Love You’ Too Soon Sucks

Do you find yourself saying ‘I love you’ too soon all the time? Learn why waiting to say ‘I love you’ just a while longer can make love so much better.

When you’re falling in love with someone, it’s hard to hold yourself back from taking the plunge.

If you’re smitten by someone you’re dating, chances are, you’d be really enthusiastic about saying ‘I love you’ and taking the next step.

But how soon is too soon?

When is the right time to say ‘I love you’?

And why is it better to wait a while instead of blurting it right out when you feel like it?

Are you saying ‘I love you’ too soon?

Love always takes time.

You may be madly infatuated by someone you’ve met on a date once, or you may think you’re in love after your first kiss.

But it’s not really love at all.

It’s just the first stage in several stages of that mushy thing called love.

And what makes falling in love with each other so magical is the tension and the confusion, the insecurities and those stolen moments of passion that build as two people start wooing each other.

But if you do say ‘I love you’ before you and your new date can feel the excitement of actually falling for each other, you could ruin the happy moment and turn it into something far more serious before both of you have even had the time to evaluate the potential relationship.

Is it wrong to say ‘I love you’ too soon?

Well, truth be told, it’s never wrong to say ‘I love you’ too soon. After all, if you feel it, you feel it. What’s the point in hiding your feelings for someone?

At times, revealing your love for someone may be the best thing you could do, especially if they love you back already. But what happens if you’re dating someone who’s still evaluating you as a long term partner potential?

If you rush it by professing your love for someone who’s still not ready to love you, you may end up losing the relationship even though both of you were perfect for each other. So if you can wait for it, it’s always better to wait a while rather than rushing into something and ruining it without giving the relationship a fair chance.

10 reasons why saying ‘I love you’ too soon sucks

If you truly love someone, or are waiting to say ‘I love you’ for the first time, keep these 10 reasons in mind and test your own potential relationship.

And if you feel like you stand a good chance and are not rushing into love even after reading these tips, then go right ahead and say those three magical words to the one you love!

#1 The guessing game is over. The excitement of playing hard to get with each other is what makes falling in love so much fun. Both of you like each other a lot, can’t stop touching each other and feel so good inside every time both of you meet. You’re not in a relationship yet, but both of you are falling hard for each other already.

If you say ‘I love you’ too soon, the excitement of wondering what’s on each other’s minds would end overnight. It’s not a bad thing, but a longer courting almost always gives a better chance for a longer relationship because both of you waited before taking the plunge.

#2 Are you an obsessive lover? Some people are obsessive lovers. They jump into a new relationship with someone as soon as one relationship ends because they can’t stay single. They love being in love, and need love to feel complete. These kinds of lovers end up saying ‘I love you’ even without realizing whether they’re really in love with their date.

And as you meet your date often over time, instead of trying to build the love, you may spend many of your dates trying to convince yourself that you’ve actually met the one!

#3 When there’s no reciprocation. If you say ‘I love you’ and your date doesn’t respond with the same sentence, it makes the whole relationship go backwards. It’ll leave one of you confused and the other angry.

And that builds insecurities and fills the air with a lot of awkwardness. Unless you’re completely smitten by this person you’re dating and don’t care whether they love you back or not, avoid saying it too soon.

#4 A big misunderstanding. If you say something as serious as ‘I love you’ very early into the relationship, your date may think you’re not really in love with them, but are just saying it to please them. That’s really the worst thing, because your three magical words have just lost all meaning to your date.

#5 How well do you know each other? People get infatuated by each other at first sight. They don’t fall in love! If you really need to love someone, you need to love them for who they are. So what do you know about your date? Do you know about their exes, how many relationships they’ve been in, about their likes and dislikes and the kind of person they are? Always make sure you actually like the real person you’re dating for their personality before professing your love to them.

#6 Are you insecure? Ask yourself this question sincerely, are you saying ‘I love you’ to this special person just to cover your insecurities? Some smitten lovers say those words just to beat any competition out of the way, or arm-twist the one they’re dating so they can feel more secure about the relationship or push away anyone else who’s threatening the relationship. If you have to profess your love, do it for the right reasons.

#7 Stuck in love. If one of you says ‘I love you’ too soon, and the other person accepts and responds with the same line without really thinking, one or both of you may feel stuck in the relationship because it all happened so fast.

If you say it too soon, your lover may even get angry with you if they jumped in too fast and reciprocated by saying that they loved you too. And instead of focusing on love, your new partner may have to spend all their time wondering if they really need to be in a serious relationship with you. Would you like that?

#8 Pressure doesn’t always work. Once you say it, the secret’s out in the open for you and your date to see. And you can’t take your words back again. What if your date just wants a casual relationship with you and doesn’t want anything serious just yet? They may really love you, but they may still be unsure about doing anything about it.

And remember, there’s no going back once you say it. If your date’s uncertain about the future of the romance, saying ‘I love you’ will force them to think about it. And the extra pressure on deciding immediately may just force your date into turning you down or walking away if they’re not ready to be held down in a serious romance.

#9 Prove your love. If you really want to say ‘I love you’ and hear it back from your date, then learn to play it safe. Instead of saying ‘I love you’, prove your love through actions. Don’t say how much you love your date, but show it through your romantic gestures. If your date loves you, they’ll reciprocate with happiness. But if they aren’t looking for something serious, they’d seem uncomfortable with your affection.

#10 Watch their response to your love. You’ll know if your date loves you back if they go out of their way to do something for you too. After you smother your date with love and romance, wait and watch their response. If your date really loves you, they’d start indulging in little romantic gestures like buying you gifts or going out of their way to do something nice for you.

If that happens, yeah, your date loves you. On the other hand, if your date doesn’t respond in kind, perhaps they just need more time to fall madly in love with you.

When is the best time to say I love you?

Express your love when you believe you’re truly in love. But at the same time, be certain that your date is ready to hear it. A good rule of thumb here, both of you should have spent at least a month seriously dating each other each and must have met each other on at least five real romantic dates.

To some, this may seem like it’s all too fast. And to many others, it may seem like a lot of waiting. But a month into dating each other is the perfect time to express your love for this special someone. The infatuation would have peaked and led to something a lot more beautiful, and big chances are, it could just be love!

The waiting game

If you wait too long, your new date may get bored or wonder if the relationship’s going anywhere. If you say it too soon, you may ruin your relationship because of all the added pressure and the confusion.

If you want the experience to seem like a fairy tale romance, take your time while saying ‘I love you’ and read the signs. Keep an eye on the budding relationship and take the plunge when you feel like love’s all around in the air.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

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Here’s Why Staying Silent After A Break Up Is The Ultimate Revenge

Breakups are never fun. They aren’t supposed to be. We all have been through some terrible and disastrous breakups where our entire world comes crashing down. It hurts us so bad, that we feel like smashing our ex into pieces and hatching a good revenge plan.

Relax! At times, things don’t work out and are simply not meant to be, and that’s absolutely okay. We understand, when matters of the heart don’t yield positive results, pain is inevitable. But revenge is never the solution. If you still feel that revenge will give you peace, try this one, silence. Here’s why it’s the best weapon in your armor.

Silence speaks volumes

The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don’t give in. If you do, you are meeting their expectations. Try seeking sadistic pleasure by using silence as a weapon.

Your ex wins the breakup, so what?

The never-ending battle of who eventually wins the breakup is a thing. Ask yourself, do you really need to win the breakup just to satisfy your ego and make yourself feel superior? You DON’T! Are you really this petty? NO, right? Instead, be the bigger person by not reacting to the breakup. Your silence will make your ex feel guiltier.

You are giving that person unnecessary importance

If you’re busy plotting revenge, you are giving that person unnecessary attention and importance in your life even after the breakup. You can easily avoid this and live your life peacefully, instead focusing on healing and feeling happier. You can’t always determine the fate of your relationship, but how you deal with the pain when things end is something you have control over. Always remember that!

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

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Tales of Rock: ‘DESTROYED BY DRUGS’: Elton John says Michael Jackson was a ‘walking drug addict’

Elton John believes drug addiction made Michael Jackson’s later years hell.

In his new memoir Me: Elton John, the I’m Still Standing singer opens up about his relationship with the late King of Pop, who he had known “since he was 13 (or) 14 years old”, admitting he became concerned for him in adulthood due to his bizarre behaviour.

Speaking with Entertainment Tonight at a special orchestral screening of the musical biopic Rocketman with the Hollywood Symphony Orchestra at the Greek Theater in Los Angeles on Thursday, Elton claimed the star became a “walking drug addict” in his later years before his death, aged just 50, from an overdose of sedatives in 2009.

“What happened to him was such a tragedy, with the drugs and I don’t think he had a particularly happy life leading up to his big success,” the Tiny Dancer star, 72, said. “I think success is hard to deal with and I think Michael found it hard and became isolated.

“It was awkward to be around him. It was tragic to be around him,” he continues. “This was someone who was one of the most talented people to come on Earth, and it was so sad to see him destroyed by the drugs … He was a walking drug addict and was on everything possible.”

Elton, who has his own well-documented history with drug addiction, added it’s “upsetting when you see someone that you care about (suffering) and you can’t do anything about it.”

The rocker’s memoir, Me, is out now.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Silence speaks volumes

Your ex wins the breakup, so what?

You are giving that person unnecessary importance

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