Facebook brings ‘Secret Crush’ feature on Dating profile

Secret Crush, as it’s called, lets you express interest in up to nine Facebook friends. The good news is, you have to opt in if you want to participate, so you won’t be bombarded with a bunch of random dating requests if you don’t want them. If someone adds you to their secret crush list, Facebook will send you a notification but will only reveal the name if you pick the same person as your secret crush. Also, if you like our efforts, consider sharing this story with your friends, this will encourage us to bring more exciting updates for you. Facebook Dating services are available on the Facebook smartphone application at present in the following countries: Paraguay, Colombia, Canada, Argentina, Mexico, Brazil, Ecuador, Vietnam, Guyana, Peru, Bolivia, Chile, Uruguay, Laos, Malaysia, Thailand, Philippines, Singapore, and Suriname.

That could entice more reluctant Facebook users to give Dating a shot – who isn’t curious to see whether a friend secretly likes them? You will also be able to share plans about your dates, with your friends and family on Messenger. The redesign makes it easier to access and use Groups, meet new friends, see upcoming events, and ship Marketplace items. Liverpool won’t receive title favors from Newcastle – Benitez City vs Liverpool: Five things you need to know… “My relationship with the city of Liverpool , the club and the fans is there”. Both sides have over 90 points and the race for the crown could be set to go down to the final day. HHS announces rule that ‘protects’ groups and individuals from performing abortions During Facebook’s F8 developers’ conference this week, the issue of user privacy seemed to loom over the event as Facebook announced even more invasive features and joked about the sites numerous data scandals. It is different from Tinder and users are not required to swipe people to like them. The new version of the social media mobile app will be simpler and faster.

First things first: New year, new look, baby! The new look rolls-out in the United States today, and for the rest of the world in the coming weeks. It’s available through the Facebook App, and allows people to control their experience with it. You’ll then be able to speak to each other about that crush. Facebook is working to downplay recommendations from groups known for spreading misinformation, and deleting groups that break the company’s community standards. The number of Facebook users in Vietnam is the seventh highest in the world, with over 58 million people as of a year ago, an increase of 16 percent over 2017, according to a report by social media marketing and advertising agency We Are Social.

 

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Matchmaker’s business flourishes amid ‘dating app fatigue’

Michal Naisteter approached a city planner at Reading Terminal Market and bantered with a pediatrician at the Bok Bar rooftop. At a Franklin Institute Science After Hours event, she was intrigued by a young entrepreneur, and she chatted up a Delaware politician at a local coffee shop.

No matter where she meets people, her introduction remains the same.

“Hey, I’m Michal. I’m a married matchmaker,” she says. “Are you by any chance single, ’cause I think you’re really cute.”

All those people ended up saying yes to Naisteter, 35, who for two years has worked as a matchmaker for the national company Three Day Rule.

They are soon added to her company’s pool of more than 4,500 Philadelphia singles, most of whom are not paying members but are open to being set up. After a meeting where they have a “heart to heart” with Naisteter, she considers matching them with a client.

While many people may start humming along to the song from Fiddler on the Roof when they hear the word matchmaker, Naisteter’s company emphasizes a modern approach to what may seem like a quaint method for finding love.

There has been demand for matchmaking services as the proliferation of apps has chipped away at the stigma associated with seeking outside help for dating, an IBISWorld report on the growing $3 billion industry shows. Even with free options like Tinder at the fingertips of singles, some people turn to matchmakers for a more personalized, albeit pricey, experience.

People in Philly seem particularly disgruntled with the city’s dating pool, Naisteter said. Though loyal to the city, they say living here is like a small town where they already know everyone. That’s simply not true in the sixth largest city in the United States, she says.

For those who want to work with Naisteter, there is a $5,500 premium membership fee for three months, with higher priced options for six and 12 months. With this payment comes an in-depth meeting about anything from family history and past relationships to the attributes of a potential partner, as well as a professional photo shoot.

Then, Naisteter will search LinkedIn, Instagram, and networking events, or while living her daily life, like grocery shopping, to find people to match with her clients, with a goal of at least one match a month.

Other matchmakers range from national companies like the paid-service It’s Just Lunch to Danielle Selber, who is called the “in-house matchmaker” at the Philadelphia nonprofit Tribe 12, which encourages people to make a $36 donation if they are satisfied with the experience.

The way Naisteter views it, a matchmaker saves her clients time by searching on their behalf and then screening people before a first date to make sure they are representing themselves accurately and are a good fit. Her objective, she says, is getting people on fewer but better dates.

Three Day Rule launched in Philadelphia in May 2016, three years after its founding in Los Angeles. In that time, the company says, it has matched about 550 people in Philly and sat down with more than 1,500 singles. Naisteter has worked with more than 50 paying clients and of her current clients, the youngest is 26 and oldest is 67.

While Naisteter said there is not one metric for success, since not everyone is looking to be married right away if at all, the company said that in the last couple years, 70 percent of its clients overall were still dating one of their matches when their contract ended.

Even if the people Naisteter meets don’t fit well with a paying client, she helps them improve their dating profiles or offers general advice.

“I’m like a cheerleader and a sex therapist and your girlfriend all rolled up into one,” she said.

Modern matchmaking

Three Day Rule CEO Talia Goldstein started listing her colleagues’ recent successes on one of their recent weekly conference calls with matchmakers in 10 cities, including Los Angeles and New York.

“For matching shoutouts, Melissa has two second dates and a third date. Samantha has a third date. Julia has a second date, and a client who went on hold to date her match….”

But when it was Naisteter’s turn, she didn’t highlight a traditional success like a wedding. She told a story about rejection.

He is in his 30s with a healthy career, but no relationship. Any time she sent him a match, he would ask: “What do I say to her?” ”What do I text her?” ”Where should we go?”

Naisteter has worked on empowering him to make his own decisions. “If you want to meet someone amazing, you have to be amazing yourself,” she would tell him.

So he gave it a try. He took a date to a ping pong bar in Philly and thought it was fantastic. But when Naisteter debriefed the woman after, she said he didn’t talk about things he did outside of work, and she didn’t feel as if he would be interested in what she does for fun, like salsa dancing. Naisteter relayed this to him and told him the woman wasn’t interested in a second date.

“So the next day, he wrote to me, ‘You know what, I think I’m still going to write to her, like I would be down to go as friends. I want to go salsa dancing, or I would come to one of the events that you organized,'” Naisteter told colleagues.

Naisteter considers her job more than just getting people dates. Along the way, she wants them to learn more about themselves and how that reflects what they are looking for in a partner.

In a way, she’d been readying herself to be a matchmaker long before she even knew a job like this existed.

After taking a human sexuality course as an undergrad at Pennsylvania State University, she went on to earn a master’s in that topic at Widener University.

She lived in Tel Aviv for a year, teaching English to children of migrant workers. She also worked in Boston and did HIV counseling on needle exchange vans. After working in public health, she decided she wanted to do more on the education side and learn Spanish.

So she went to South America with a backpack and suitcase and ended up in Medellin, Colombia, for four years. Back in Philly, she wanted a career change that blended her education, experience, personality and life history, and found this job while searching online with a friend one night.

While in Medellin, a friend set her up with her now-husband. The two have an 8-month-old daughter, Hanna Rodriguez.

With clients, Naisteter will tell them about her husband, Manuel Rodriguez. At 31, he is younger than her and from a different religion. “If we were on an app, I could’ve potentially swiped the wrong way.”

But instead of focusing on physical attributes or what was written down, the friend simply said: “You’re a good person, and he’s a good person.”

They call that friend “our cupid, or our matchmaker.”

‘Dating app fatigue’

It isn’t likely that matchmaking services like Three Day Rule will overtake the online and mobile dating market, said John Madigan, an industry research analyst at IBIS.

Tinder, PlentyOfFish, and OkCupid are all brands from Match Group Inc., which IBISWorld reports has about 42.3 percent of the industry’s market share. Match Group’s stock has more than quadrupled to about $61 Monday from $15.20 in November 2015.

Dating sites like Match.com, eHarmony, and Chemistry.com comprise half of the market. Mobile dating, which can be found free with apps like Hinge and Bumble, is 31 percent. Matchmaking is just 12 percent. Match Group was an early investor in Three Day Rule in 2014.

But Madigan has noticed that “dating app fatigue” is driving demand for matchmakers.

“People are getting tired of swiping right, swiping left, ‘Do I find this person attractive?’ It’s a very superficial-based connection,” he said. While other matchmaking firms do this work, Madigan singled out Three Day Rule in his report because it has been “growing quite quickly,” doubling in revenue in 2018.

After spending years swiping through five different dating apps, Ed Cahan, 37, an engineer who works in real estate, was losing hope. His friends were married and having their second children, and he felt his time was ticking away.

He got coffee with Naisteter and asked how the premium membership worked.

“I thought about it for a couple days, and then I was like, ‘You know what, I tried all the apps, I tried all these things, Why not? I’ll say yes and I’ll see what happens.'”

So they met up again. Naisteter optimized his dating profile by helping him get new photos and linking his Instagram account to show off his woodworking hobby. She told him his usual date suggestion of coffee around 6 p.m. was just plain bad. Since he doesn’t drink, she suggested going to a nice restaurant at 8 p.m. for dessert and a better ambiance.

Cahan, who lives in Northern Liberties, told her how he was looking for someone who was Jewish like him, adventurous, entrepreneurial, and outdoorsy.

When she sent over his first match, he told her the next day that she nailed it. “You listened to me and you found exactly what I was looking for,” he recalled.

The two went on a dessert date last month at Parc. Even though he said it was a good date, the two haven’t gone on a second.

Now he is waiting for more matches.

 

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Tinder Has Revealed the Dating Trends That Will Dominate 2019

Pexels

Modern dating is a complicated topic, long gone are the days of just meeting someone down the pub and dating someone from work is never going to end well.

So online dating has taken the forefront in meeting new people, regardless of what you think of the whole process it’s clearly here to stay.

With the new trend comes new terms when it comes to potential romance. ‘Gaslighting‘ was one of the major talking points from last year when it came to relationships. Basically it centred on the idea of one person continually knocking down the other, affecting their confidence, opinions, and how they see the world and themselves.

Tinder has become one of the most popular options for budding romantics and the platform has released a list of dating terms they believe are going to take over the next year.

Dracula-ing: When the person who only surfaces in the dead of night hits you with a “u up?” text.

Exagger-date: The act of embellishing a date so as to suggest it went way better than it actually did.

Bird Boxing: Being blind to just how bad your partner/the person you’re seeing/the idiot you hook up with is.

Buzz-erflies: The feeling you get when your phone buzzes, and it’s the maybe-special someone you’ve been waiting to hear from all day.

Deflexting: When someone blatantly ignores a question you ask via text (like, “when are we hanging next?”) and brings up a totally different subject, thus making you feel awkward.

S.O. stalemate: When neither party will start the define-the-relationship conversation, leading to no relationship progress whatsoever.

Insta-gator: The person who initiates contact or first publicises a relationship via social media by tagging, DM-ing, or posting a photo of you two. Can be good or bad.

Three-dot disappearing act: The act of starting to type a message and then stopping, causing the three dots in your conversation to keep vanishing and popping up in a wholly torturous cycle.

iPhony: The person who constantly says, “I’ll text you!” but never makes good on their promise.

 

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Phicklephilly – Tinder Moments

Here’s another round of wacky and weird profiles from the online dating community! This is what we’re dealing with out here in the dating trenches!

Enjoy!

 

 

 

I Super Liked Catson!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.
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The Relationship Rules Every Guy Needs to Follow

Maintaining a strong, happy relationship can be difficult work – but it doesn’t have to be.  Follow the 6 relationship rules for men described below, and you’ll have a much easier time creating loving relationships with the women you date.

Rule #1 Don’t “fix” her problems

An important relationship rule for men who want easier relationships is to avoid the urge to try and “fix” her problems.  When the girl you’re dating starts venting about the people and things causing stress in her life, don’t just offer your solutions.  Because chances are she’s not looking for solutions – she just wants to be heard.

So instead, just listen to what she has to say and validate how she feels.  Simply supporting her will create a stronger emotional connection between you.  This alone can automatically get her to start feeling better.  You can then find out if she’s interested in your advice by asking “Would you like any advice on how to handle that situation?”  If she says yes, offer your tips for solving her problem.  If not, all she’s really looking for is that connection.  So just continue listening and empathizing with her situation.

Rule #2 Set Boundaries

If you want a quality relationship then you’ve got to set boundaries.  You need to draw a line and let your girl know exactly what you will and won’t accept from your relationship.  Some guys are hesitant to set boundaries as they’re worried it’ll chase the girl away.  But the fact is women are more attracted to guys who set and enforce boundaries.  After all no girl wants a guy she can walk all over.  Women want a strong man who has standards.

You can set boundaries both in regards to how the girl treats you or how the relationship is defined.  You may, for example, find that the girl you’re dating has a habit of teasing you in a way you don’t appreciate.  Or perhaps you think she gets a little too friendly with other guys when you go out.  In either case, calmly let her know exactly what behaviors you won’t tolerate.  If she continues pushing those boundaries you’ll have to find a way to enforce them.  That may mean you need to take time (even if it’s just a night) away from her – so she can see you’re serious.

Rule #3 Working through your issues

When setting boundaries – or working through any other relationship problem – a good relationship rule for men is to avoid assigning blame or making personal attacks.  The more confrontational your words and attitude are when trying to work through a problem, the harder it’s going to be reach a resolution.

Instead of calling her names or blaming her for problems, simply let her know how certain behaviors make you feel.  For example, let’s say you’re upset because she never bothered to introduce you to her friends when you were out the night before.  Instead of saying “You’re so rude, you should have introduced me to your friends” try saying something like “It hurt that you didn’t introduce me, I felt like you didn’t want me there.  Next time I’d really appreciate an introduction”.  By phrasing it this way you’re not attacking, blaming, or trying to control her.  You’re simply stating how you feel and what you’d like.  As a result she’ll be far more willing to do things your way.

Rule #4 Make time for other friends/activities

A great relationship rule for men to follow to make sure a relationship is lifting you up – and not dragging you down – is to carve out some time for yourself.  After all you don’t want to be one of those guys who only gets fulfillment from this one relationship.  That puts a lot of pressure on things to always go well – and the smallest bumps in the relationship can feel like major catastrophes.

So make a point to continue getting satisfaction and fulfillment from other areas of your life.  Make time for old friends and the activities you enjoy.  Doing so will keep you from needing too much from your relationship.  And it’ll be easier to sit back and enjoy the relationship for what it is.

Rule #5 Don’t take the relationship for granted

Guys will often put a lot of energy and effort into getting a girl, but then back-off once they’ve got her.  They’ll stop going on fun dates and pay less attention to her as time goes on.  This can make a girl feel resentful and underappreciated, and turn the relationship stale.

To make sure you don’t become one of those guys continue putting effort and energy into your relationship.  Surprise your girl with little gifts, phone calls, or messages that show you how much you appreciate her.  Keep taking her on fun dates and having new experiences together.  Doing all this keeps the relationship strong and exciting, so this is a key relationship rule for men to follow.

(For additional tips on how to create a successful relationship, click here)

Rule #6 If it’s time to move on…

If the relationship no longer does it for you then it may be time to cut the cord and move on.  Some guys are hesitant to do this and will stay in the relationship until they find a new girl to date.  But this is a huge problem for two reasons:  First, it’s wildly unfair to the girl who thinks she’s in a committed relationship.  And second, if you’re not fully committed to going after that next girl it’s going to take that much longer to find her.  So if you know a relationship is over have that talk and move on.  Then you’ll be in a much better position to start a new, fresh relationship with someone else.

More relationship rules and advice

The relationship rules for men described above will help you create stronger relationships.  But just as important as creating strong relationships is being able to spot the warning signs that a relationship is in trouble.  For tips on how to do that check out this article on relationship red flags.

 

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Cherie – Chapter 50 – …Than to Receive – Part 3

Baby fell asleep after our fiery session. I’m a giver. I’ve always been since I was nineteen in LA.

NO. I’ve always been a giver and a pleaser since I was a kid. when you grow up feeling like a loser and an inferior shit… you always give. You are a twisted pile of insensitive parenting and you are your own weakness.

You’ll always please and give to everybody you know when you’re broken as a person. I’ve always been that person. The pleaser. The giver. Obsessed with giving.

I remember when my father would say to me “Don’t be a victim.” The crazy irony is that his very behavior in how he treated me made me into the victim I have been my entire life. He gave me great lessons and taught me so much about life and I’m grateful for that. But his rage and behavior towards me over the years destroyed any self-esteem I could have ever cultivated to be the leader I could have been.

He would be pissed at my mom for her sexless stoic attitude and I would fail at school and he would rip me a new one instead of her. But I was just the fuse. The powder keg was him and she was the bomb.

He was the torch and she was the can of gas. They were a complete mismatch. The most terrifying moments in my life were at my father’s hands and words. He knew he could destroy a person with his tongue.

He took shameful pride in it.

His own mother. My Grammie. I loved her. She was an orphan that was given up because the family was too poor to keep her (More later) she once described her son… my father… as,  “The cow that gives the milk and then kicks the bucket over.”

I’m a middle-aged hyper-sexual. I’m like no one you know. Unless you’re best buds with David Duchovney. The needle on my sex drive has been cranked way back, but the demon still lives in there, but he’s cool.

I used to say that I was at war with my demons. But now we’re all on the same side.

Anxiety? Settle the fuck down. Depression? Oh, for fuck’s sake go out and do something!

How bad is my life?

Daughter Lorelei lives with me, I love her dearly and she’s turned out right. I’m writing these words and lovely Cherie’s is turning in my bed naked and beautiful while I take a break from the action to write this.

I love to see her sleep. I know her life is hard and I admire her mettle to go forth and succeed at 27. I also admire her love for me at my age. When she comes to my place in Rittenhouse  she can completely hide from the world. No work. No school. No kids. Just love, warmth romance and lots of mad sex.

Tomorrow we’re going to sleep in and have a delicious breakfast of whatever baby wants.

We’ll probably hit Midtown Diner because that’s where we started.

She’ll vanish on a train again and I’ll go back to work, errands and friends.

I need to maintain my relationship with Cherie. Because despite our differences and distance, I look at Cherie and see one word.

WIFE.

Okay, I know that seems scary and Lorelei would lose her shit but this lady seems that good.

Only time will tell…

 

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Cherie – Chapter 49 – Better to Give… Part 2

I draw the blue translucent curtains shut. Because tonight will carry us both into tomorrow.

I’ve lived a charmed life. It’s been good. I’ve had opportunity because of my skin, intelligence and wit. I’ve succeeded because of my dedication and hard work. I’m an overachiever.  A relentless sales guy that gets off on the kill. But I have natural ability in everything I do. You either kill it or get lazy the first chance you get because everything once you get it comes so easy to you because of your deadly abilities.

You only have that power because of your wiring and your upbringing. If you beat down a bright sensitive, odd child he will either become a CEO, a serial killer, or an artist. I’m sure there are a few other characters in there but I think you get it. (I’m the artist!)

That’s me. Here I am in my bed with a beautiful young woman again. It’s like I keep getting free passes from God to just keep going on the fun ride again and again! I don’t really know why. No one else I know gets these sort of splendors.

But fortune favors the bold.

And this frightened, anxiety ridden mess has run from his fears but then paused. I turned and slowly walked towards them and conquered them all. Without drugs. The drugs just fuck you up more. Surround yourself with good people and march forward toward your fears.

 

Cherie tells me we’ve talked enough but she wants to be naked.  She’s wearing the classic criss cross black body suit without a bra. (See: Cherie – Chapter 4 – Ribbons) Hot as shit. I love seeing the swing and curve over her breasts through that mesh top. She’s telling me some story about her and her sister in a store where they’re laughing and I reach my fingers through that criss cross lace.

She pauses and closes her eyes. I feel the soft supple swell of her breast. I go just a bit further and greet her stiffened nipple between my index and middle finger.

“Go on with your story.”

“I forget.” (smiles) “Wait I remember!”

I withdraw my hand but hold her close.

“My sister always threatens me that she’s going to steal my car and take it out.”

“What do you do?”

“I tell her that if she ever fucking takes my keys and steals my Saab I will call 911.”

“Oh my gosh!”

“Yea. I tell her that I will tell the cops that a black woman has stolen my Saab and I am a white woman and she has a gun!”

“Are you trying to get your sister killed?’

“No, Silly! It’s just a bit we do between each other because we know that’s how it is in this country. They’d pop a cap in my sister’s ass and kill her if that ever happened.”

Cherie giggles. I love comedy. Especially edgy next level borderline comedy, but there’s a dark truth in her humor.

“Well I’m tired of talking to you and I want to get naked.”

“No complaints here, dear.”

“But I’ve been at the hospital and school all day so I’m going to rinse off.”

“Okay bayba.”

Cherie gets up, kicks off her boots and pulls down her jeans.  Now she’s down to the one piece criss cross delish and a pair of purple panties.

She’s looking gorgeous and I can’t resist. I leap from the bed and go to her. We kiss and I hold her in my arms. I reach between her brown thighs and curl my finger between the two snaps holding the body suit together at the crotch.

I reach behind her because I don’t want to rip her little garment. I love this outfit. I have to be careful. I hold the back of the outfit that is basically a thong that is a cotton bridge between her delicious ass cheeks.

Cherie has a glorious but proportionate posterior. Not Kardashian, but athletic standard black girl butt.

It’s lovely.

I kiss her. She kisses me back. We miss each other. I’m happy and feel her love and heat in my arms. Out of everyone in the world, this is my girlfriend. I can’t believe at my age I’m still able to get a girlfriend half my age this pretty.

Well I kinda do.

Apparently, game goes a long way, baby.

“Can you close the drapes? Because you’re about to strip me naked.”

“Oh course my dear.”

I draw the blue translucent curtains shut. Because tonight will carry us both into tomorrow.

I hold my love close and the snaps at the bottom of her outfit yield to my force and open with the sound that is their name.

I gently pull the body suit over her body and from her head. (You never want to mess up a black woman’s hair…EVER)

Now she’s nude in front of me and I turn her around to the full length mirror in the corner of my bedroom. Given to me by former girlfriend, Michelle! (See: Michelle – A Brand New Day)

I’m still fully dressed but Cherie is completely nude and vulnerable. I like the idea that she can see herself in the mirror and I’m behind her. Clutching her breasts and kissing her neck. My right hand leaves her firm breast and caresses her belly down to the moist junction between her lovely thighs.

I touch her there and she jumps. Her softest spot and her most durable. I remove my hand and continue to kiss her neck.

“I’ve been at school and at the hospital all day. I need to rinse off.”

I regain some composure. I have to. I know what’s about to happen in the next 30 minutes.

I release my lady.

 

Living here on a weekly basis with my daughter Lorelei, it almost seems alien being alone here with a beautiful young woman and making mad love to her when she gets here.

Lorelei is great with telling me when she’ll be here and when she won’t. She’s off at Electric Halloween with her boyfriend this weekend. But she ALWAYS tells me when she’ll be rolling in and out of here. I love that because I never have to worry she’ll come upon some sort of “We were just working out doing nude yoga together in my bedroom scenario.”

Cherie heads to the shower.

 

Later, Cherie gets to her knees and is digging through her bag for whatever sundries she needs for this delayed mission. I’m standing next to her and I am lit up with blood lust.

This is how cool Cherie is: She is digging through her bag looking for her skin cream for after her shower and she gently places her hand on my crotch. It’s obvious I’m chubbing and firing up the Millennium Falcon to go, but that hand is an immediate soothe.

“I feel you… I’ll be right back, honey.”

Cherie hops in the shower. (I would have done love dirty. I don’t care) I’m pacing the bedroom like the cat that I am and putting on ‘ Music for Lovers’ on Pandora. (Hey I know it’s cheese but I like the stuff they play on there. Check it out!)

She comes out of the bathroom and gets in the bed and hops under the covers.

“I’m chilly!”

“You’re beautiful.”

“I love you honey.”

“I love you too…Guess what?”

“What, dear?”

“Take me…Now.”

 

I’m going to leave it to the beloved band Queen to describe the events of our night together.

 

 

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