14 Cringeworthy Opening Lines Real Women Have Gotten IRL That Are Totally Shocking

Let’s be real: Flirting is not always easy. Whether you make a joke that totally doesn’t land or you ask someone out only to learn that they have a partner — making the first move can sometimes be tricky. Of course, when it comes to flirting with someone new, the line between endearingly awkward and full-blown terrible can be dangerous territory to tread. If someone doesn’t respect your personal space or if they get, like, uncomfortably sexual two seconds into talking — cringeworthy opening lines can make you never want to leave your house again.

Of course, if you’re trying to going out with your friends or even by yourself, you don’t need to let anyone crash your plans. If someone is trying to flirt and you’re not feeling it, it’s always OK to tell them to buzz off. (Do people still say that?) You’re obviously a beautiful flawless angel that anyone would be lucky to talk to, but that doesn’t mean that just anyone is allowed to talk to you if you’re not interested.

I asked 13 women for the most cringeworthy opening lines people have tried on them and, well, I may literally never get over what came next.

1. I NEVER LIKED MATH

You’re a nine out of 10, and I’m the one you need.

— Laura, 27

2. I’LL TAKE A RAIN CHECK

I know it’s the summer, but you’re guaranteed to get a full seven inches tonight.

— Kim, 24

3. NO, THANK YOU

This guy summoned my over with a finger gesture and then said, ‘I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole fist!’

— SupineProtoplasm

4. …I GOTTA GO

When I saw you my heart skipped a beat. Then it pumped blood to my corpora cavernosa, causing my penis to become erect.

— Aqquila89

5. I THINK MY UBER IS HERE

If I was an enzyme, I’d be DNA helices so I could unzip your genes.

— wuroh7

6. YOUR MOM WOULDN’T APPROVE

You smell like my mom.

— TheFifthMovement

7. I’M A SOLO HERO

I was working at a convenience store just off campus from the local college. Some jerk stumbled over from a dorm party one Friday night. He was trying way too hard to drunkenly flirt with me. I told him politely that I had a boyfriend. And he replies, ‘Dump the zero and go with the hero, baby.’ I couldn’t help myself. I laughed and laughed until he turned tail and left. It was so unbearably cringeworthy.

— Reina_Banana_Pug

8. CAN’T BUY CLASS

M’lady, I’m sure you’re sick of all these boys, so how about you give a man with class a chance?

— soccergirl13

9. JUST, NO.

 

Once a guy told me, ‘Miss, you got a body like a chocolate bar.’ I said, ‘So, I am flat on both sides.’ He looked confused for a minute and said, ‘No, chocolate bars can be fat like snickers.’ I said, ‘Are you calling me fat?’ He looked defeated and walked away.

— sawdustbrain

10. I THINK I NEED SOME SPACE

Ayo, girl there ’bout to only be eight planets cuz I’m gonna destroy Uranus.

— PmButtPics4ADrawing

11. I’LL STAY IN, THANKS

Hey girl, you’re like my appendix, I don’t know how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me wanna take you out.

— kingJoffi

12. I’M A FREELANCER

‘Are you an unemployed CEO?’ ‘No, why?’ ‘Because you look like you could use some company.’

— ratboid314

13. I’LL DANCE BY MYSELF, THANKS

 

I was once walking through a park when a cute guy approached me and struck up a conversation. He asked me to salsa dance, which I thought was kind of odd (and I turned down), and asked for my number (which I gave to him). We texted a bit but never met up afterward. Then, a full year later, I was walking through another park 10 minutes away, and the same guy approached me and asked me to salsa dance! I recognized him immediately and called him out on it. He showed me his contact list on his phone: it was full of girls’ first names with one-word descriptions (‘blonde,’ ‘redhead,’ ‘tall’) and rankings out of 10 — all girls he picked up in this exact same way. Obviously, I never went out with him after that, either.

— Hannah, 26

14. I’M NOT REALLY IN THE MOOD TO CHAT

I may not be the prettiest girl in here, but I’m the only one talking to you.

— jubileo5

 

From parties to bars, sometimes it feels like cringeworthy opening lines are everywhere. Of course, you deserve to go where you want to go without fighting off any unwanted attention. If someone’s trying to flirt and you’re not into it — it’s always OK to give them a big Thank U, Next. And if they’re not getting the message, it’s OK to “Next” them without thanking them at all.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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5 Ways to Flirt With Your Soul to Attract Your Soulmate

Many people are out in the world hoping to find their soulmate. They want to find the person who will fit into their lives amazingly. They want to find that ever-elusive “One True Love” that evades them.

When you’re out in a bar and flirting with the person next to you, how do you know if you’re even doing it right? Is what you’re doing even attracting the right people? The answer depends: are you flirting with your soul?

It sounds complicated, and it can be, but speaking with your very being and soul is what draws the right people in and keeps the wrong people out. Here are some ways to flirt with your soul to attract your soulmate.

5 Ways To Flirt With Your Soul To Attract Your Soulmate

1. Practice Honesty

Honesty is the best policy when it comes to flirting with your soul. Anything founded on lies or half-truths will come back to bite you at the end of the day. Besides, how can you use your soul if you’re masking what it contains? Here are some ways you need to be honest to flirt with your soul.

· Be Honest With Yourself

Flirting with your soul involves knowing yourself well, and the only way to do so is to be honest with yourself. A lot of times, people fear who they are without realizing it, so they ignore their innermost voices in favor of avoiding personal introspection.

That’s why it’s important to be honest with yourself. You have to be confident in yourself, and in order to do so, you have to know yourself and be real about it! So be proud of who you are, practice positive thinking, and know that at the end of the day, your authentic stuff is more than enough!

· With The People You Flirt With

A lot of people embellish their lives and personalities when flirting with new people. This sets the stage for disappointment, a lack of trust, and other issues as you go on.

This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put your best foot forward – you should always do that! – it just means that you shouldn’t pretend to be someone you’re not to attract others. Your real soulmate will like you just as you are, and may even deem your dishonest self a less-than-suitable match.

· With Your Relationship Desires

There is definitely a line to be drawn regarding reasonable expectations, but that doesn’t mean you cannot go after certain desires, even if they are not the most conventional.

Unfortunately, many people believe that wanting certain things out of a relationship is “greedy” – but it isn’t greedy or shallow to want certain things out of your lifelong partner. For example, you may want a partner who:

  • Aims to travel with you often
  • Loves social gatherings or is extroverted
  • Will cook for the family
  • Has certain political leanings or opinions that align with yours
  • Is a vegetarian, vegan, or has a dietary plan similar to yours

You have to be honest with yourself and what you want. Before you attempt to find your soulmate, take time to determine what you really, truly want in a relationship.

Essentially, don’t settle! Don’t model your desires after successful relationships around you, as every relationship is unique and different. This will prevent discontentment down the line.

Be true to yourself, your desires, and who you are; in this way, seek to forge honest, real connections with others. That’s how you flirt with your soul, and it’s how your soulmate will be drawn to you!

2. Love Yourself and Heal Yourself

It’s important to work on yourself and focus on self-love, instead of searching for someone to help you heal. Not only is seeking a soulmate to make you whole a toxic way to begin a relationship, it likely won’t actually attract a real soulmate.

Of course, the concept of needing to love yourself before someone else can love you is a bit of an exaggeration, but at its root, it’s a good concept to follow. If you’re overly critical of yourself and who you are, you send out bad vibes and negative energy that will repel your soulmate – and everyone else, for that matter.

Self-love is easier than it sounds, though. So here are some ways that you can work in this area!

· Forgive Yourself

It’s not unusual for someone to be extremely hard on themselves. You might feel like your past wrongdoings mean you have to punish yourself forever. You might be stuck in the past due to moments where you messed up.

But you need to learn to be kind to yourself and be forgiving of your past. You can’t grow without making errors along the way; the best thing you can do is learn from those errors, apply the lessons to your life, and move on.

Remember that there is no such thing as failure, as those failures are only stepping stones to success. Learn to take each failure in a positive way, and you’ll be able to do the same for others.

· Work On Healing

Old wounds can make it difficult to move forward. It can cause you to form protective habits to prevent yourself from being hurt again, without truly understanding the wounds you’ve sustained.

Take a moment to examine your so-called emotional baggage. Take a look at areas of your life and behavior that are affected by this baggage. Recognize where your issues come from; then let yourself understand them.

Realize that these problems do not dictate your future and that you can incorporate positive habits to prevent them. Allow yourself to heal and give yourself permission to be happy. Believe that the rest will follow.

· Prioritize Self-Love

Treat yourself well every single day. Listen to your body and mind and what it wants. Be gentle with your mistakes. Do what you can do be happy.

It can feel like an uphill battle at first, but soon, little positive affirmations, moments of kindness, and your self-love habits will become natural to you. You’ll really, truly love yourself more and more every day, opening the door for others to love you.

· Do Self-Care

Everyone needs a break, even go-getters like you! Make sure that your own needs are being met regularly. Treat yourself once in a while and let yourself feel pampered. It’ll do wonders for your mental health!

At the end of the day, loving yourself is attractive. It creates confidence, and your positive thinking will shine through with a bright energy that draws others in. That’s how you can flirt with your soul!

3. Pay Attention To Silence

There is a lot that can be said in silence, often more so than you can hear in audible words. Your connection to a soulmate will occur without the noise – you’ll feel it in the energy, in the air, and intuitively.

Here are some ways to learn to appreciate silence when you’re flirting with your soul to draw your soulmate in.

· Body Language

Nonverbal language makes up a huge portion of communication. If you ignore this, you might miss out on some interesting cues from a soulmate, such as:

  • Expressions
  • Gestures
  • Posture

On top of that, understanding nonverbal language will allow you to be more in control of yours so you can use it effectively when flirting!

· Eyes

Someone’s eyes say a lot about them. Some even say that they’re the window to the soul. Practice good, healthy eye contact when flirting and appreciate what you notice in the other person. Maybe there’s a spark there only you can see!

· Exist

Sometimes, all you have to do is take a step back, breathe in, and allow yourself to exist in a space. Even in a party or large social gathering, learn to appreciate the sounds of the world around you without actively participating all the time.

With a soulmate, you’ll enjoy many comfortable minutes of silence. Even when in a crowded room, you’ll be drawn to each other and will be able to exist in your own private world together. It’s a magical feeling to experience with one another, and in order to get there, you have to learn to be happy with silence.

4. Be True To Who You Are

Your soulmate will be attracted to who you really, truly are. They’re not going to be drawn in by your masks and embellishments. They’re not going to notice you when you tone yourself down to hide your perceived “weird” traits or preferences.

As we mentioned earlier, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of embellishing your life and putting on a mask when flirting. You want others to like you, so you shift into what you think they want – and, often, you get it wrong anyway.

If your goal is to attract your soulmate; other people who don’t like who you are don’t matter. They won’t be a big part of your life, and they definitely aren’t expecting you to change.

So don’t be afraid to be yourself, to be unique, and to be “weird.” Wear the outfits you love, even if your friends say they dampen your chances. Talk about your passions, even the ones others might scoff to hear about. Express yourself boldly and confidently, and even people who don’t like you will have to respect your self-assuredness.

It’s exhausting to wear any kind of mask. To be yourself is the ultimate way to flirt with your soul to attract your soulmate. Don’t put on fake personalities for others – wear your own proudly, and let those who are drawn to you be drawn further in.

5. Have Faith In The Journey

A lot of times, people are so focused on the end goal – finding a soulmate – that they forget how amazing the journey can be. A soulmate relationship is just like any other – it’s a relationship, and you need to be in a good place in your life to sustain it.

Trust that the universe is conspiring to make that happen perfectly. Don’t rush it, don’t force it, and don’t become discouraged. Put your faith in the whole process and continue to learn and grow every day. One day, as you flirt from your soul, your soulmate will find you, and you will find them.

Final Thoughts On Some Ways To Flirt With Your Soul To Attract Your Soulmate

Flirting with your soul is an art, and it takes practice. But by being honest, being yourself, and loving who you are, you’ll find that it’s not too hard to grasp. So relax and enjoy the moment. Who knows? Your soulmate might be just around the corner.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Why do good women end up alone?

https://va.topbuzz.com/s/MZesR

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Dating and Relationship Advice – Dating Rules For Women – Tried & True, Old & New

“When he asks you questions answer them honestly. Keep the conversation informative, but not skeleton in the closet informative.”

The best dating rules for girls have not changed much over the years. There are some that are more modern, however the evolution of the rules has come with changes in society.

Long gone are the days when girls sit by the phone and wait for guys to call them. Back in the day they did that because it was wrong for them to call a guy. The only way they would hear from a guy is if they were home when he called. Today it’s within the dating rules for girls for her to call a guy, however it is not in the rules for her to call him incessantly.

The following is a list of dating rules for girls to follow before, during and after her date. Some may seem outdated, however they’ve been tested over time and have been proved to work like a charm.

Before the Date

  1. Look your best for the date. Taking time for proper grooming is always a good idea. It takes time for a lady to get ready, so plan enough time to shower, do your hair, nails and make-up. When you go out on a date always make sure you do a little extra to show him that you’re excited to be spending the evening with him.
  2. Wear an appropriate outfit on the date.  If you can, find out what you’ll be doing, so that you can pick clothes to match the activity. It’s never fun to show up for a bowling date wearing a skirt and heels. If he wants to keep the activity a surprise, it is appropriate to ask what type of clothes to wear. Make sure your clothing and dress are modest, clean and match.
  3. Be on time. It’s just good old fashioned dating etiquette to be on time. This shows that you respect him and the time that he has for you. It’s been said on many occasion that a woman should keep a man waiting, I don’t think they asked the man who is waiting and waiting what he thinks of that. (I hate lateness and I feel like everybody’s late nowadays. It’s inexcusable based on all of the instant communication we all now possess.)

During the Date

  1. Allow him to be a gentleman. Chivalry is not dead. The right kind of man loves to show his respect for you by opening car doors, holding open doors, helping your coat…etc. It’s a way that they can take care of you. If you’re unsure he’s this type of man, lag behind a little bit to see if he will open the door for you. You will know soon enough and will be able to adjust accordingly.
  2. Be a lady. Men don’t like a girl who’s good at belching, farting, swearing and so forth. Use your good manners with them and they’ll appreciate it.
  3. Be confident. This all starts when you’re getting ready for the date. If you look good, then it’s easier to feel good about yourself. Men love women who exude confidence (not arrogance). Avoid fidgeting, biting your nails, or filing your nails.
  4. Keep the conversation balanced. By this I mean do not control the conversation with things about you. Asking a man questions about his life, job, family, hobbies will show him that you are genuinely interested in him. Look him in the eyes when you’re talking. When he asks you questions answer them honestly. Keep the conversation informative, but not skeleton in the closet informative. (Hate that.)
  5. Avoid the past. One of the worst first date conversations you could have is who you’ve dated, how/why you broke up and the scars you carry. If he asks, you can politely decline answering. Your baggage should stay at home where it belongs, with the skeletons. (This rule goes for both sexes)
  6. Offer to help pay for the date. Politely offer to help pay for dinner, however don’t make a big deal out of it if he says no. Guys should never expect the girl to pay. Also, they know when you’re trying to get out of it by conveniently ‘going to the bathroom’ when the check comes.
  7. Respect yourself. Not every date is the best date ever. There are times when the guy’s not who you thought he was and starts acting inappropriately. Respect yourself enough to say no and end the date. Do not worry about hurting his feelings, worry about keeping yourself safe and happy.
  8. Enjoy the moment. Smile a lot. Life’s too short, so laugh and have fun. Even if you know the relationship with this will go no further than this evening, have a good time. Dating is all about experimenting, so live it up.

After the Date

  1. Show your manners. Thank him for a great time. Again, smile and look him in the eyes so that he knows you are sincere. Let him know if you’re interested in seeing him again.
  2. Give him some time to call you. Don’t expect a call the next day. If it happens that’s great, however if it doesn’t give him a few days. Calling him a few days later to thank him again for a wonderful time is appropriate.
  3. Know when to give up. If he hasn’t called you after a few days, let it go. It’s time to move on. It’s not in the dating rules for girls to sit around waiting for a phone call that won’t come. This only puts you in a bad mood and nobody likes feeling like that. (I’ve experienced this first hand.)

 

Let’s face it ladies, you love the amazing men out there. You love it when we’re interested in you. You love it when we treat you with respect and make you feel like the lady you truly are.

 

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7 Habits that Guarantee a Happy Relationship

Disclaimer: This is a fictional piece that was written in 2017 that uses stock photos and a made up name.

Looking for love? Or simply aiming to be happy with the partner you already have? While the media is awash with information on finding true love, once you’ve met your match you’re expected to simply live happily ever after.

But according to the Office for National Statistics (ONS), 42 per cent of marriages in England and Wales end in divorce and many of us could do with some guidance in the relationship department.

The secret to lasting love

To avoid being one of these disconcerting statistics, help is at hand. If you want to be part of a happy couple, Dr Robert Epstein is your guy. The renowned American psychologist, along with colleagues Regina Warfel and James Johnson, conducted in-depth relationship research at the University of California San Diego and found strong relationships boil down to seven key skills.

‘No matter what your personality, or the state of your relationship, improving these skills will help your relationship work better,’ he says.

According to Dr Robert Epstein, the seven key relationship skills you need to follow are as follows:

1. Communication

This means knowing how to listen, sharing your thoughts and feelings honestly, refraining from criticizing and encouraging your partner to share his or her feelings.

It’s all about opening up, and letting your other half open up too, in a judgement-free space. Sounds simple enough!

2. Knowledge of your partner

What’s his shirt size? What’s her favorite food? After communication, simply knowing a lot about your partner is a powerful way to show them you care, and makes you better equipped to tend to each other’s ongoing needs.

When she gets home from a stressful day and you’ve run a bath with her favourite lavender oil and poured a cup of Pinot Grigio, she’ll know how much you really do care (and listen).

3. Being mature about conflict resolution

Conflict-resolution skills include techniques like staying focused on the topic, staying in the present, being ready to forgive or apologize, and knowing when to take a break. You’re going to disagree, so make sure you do it in the best way possible.

4. Brushing up your life skills

Do you plan for emergencies? Do you exercise and stay fit? Studies show people want their partners to take good care of themselves and also want them to contribute a degree of security to a long-term relationship.

We’re not saying you need the survival skills of Bear Grylls, but being calm in a crisis and having a plan B when things don’t work out makes you a far more appealing mate.

5. Being able to self-manage

This is not the same as life skills, Epstein insists. People who are skilled at self-management take inventories of their strengths and weaknesses and always strive for improvement. They know how to interpret disturbing events in positive ways and they work hard to reach their goals.

This skill is also great for life in general, and it can help boost everything from professional success to your relationships with your children.

6. Being romantic and intimate

What does having strong skills in sex and romance look like? Inquiring and caring about how to please your partner sexually, setting aside time for intimacy, refraining from blaming each other when sex doesn’t go smoothly, and trying to stay physically attractive for your partner. So lay off the donuts and make time for romance!

7. Stress management

Do you know how to use breathing, meditation, or imagery techniques to help you fight stress? If you know how to avoid or fight stress, you’ll be better able to love and support your partner.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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