Valerie – Love Me Tinder – Date 3

3rd date!  Here I am going out with Valerie again. She’s nice, calm, age appropriate. (55) I’ve always dated younger. It’s not like I pursue them, it just happens. I’m good with young people. Always have been. My last two girlfriends were 27 when I met them. The girl before that was 32 and the one before that was 22, a rebound off another 27 yr old back in 2004! So these are the choices I have made over the last 10 years.

The reason that most of all of these relationships fail is because the women I’m dating are in  a completely different place in their lives than me. We meet, we date, we fall in love and within a short about of time they start getting feelings about being married and having children. I’ve already done that. Married, child, divorced, and then paid over $100,000 in child support over the next 15 years. I knew that if I married any of these women and it failed, my Social Security checks would be going to them. That would be financially catastrophic and I’d never come back from that. even if it worked, I’d rather have a cocktail and a cig than push a stroller through Rittenhouse ever! I love my daughter, but I’m done!

They say doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result, is a sign of madness. I have met plenty of people like that. So that’s why I’m trying to date women that are more age appropriate.  I recently was chatting with a woman in her twenties and she said: “I usually date men twice my age.” When I was finished bashing my head against the marble counter, I realized I still want to date younger women. But I must try to change and grow. Or… I could just date everybody of all ages and see what happens.

The Date

I arrived at El Rey for our date at 4:40. Threw back a can of Tecate, and chatted with the hostess and a few of the servers. Valerie’s texted me that her meeting ran late and she was just getting home to walk her dog.

She arrived at 5:15 and I was already onto Tecate number two. I get a table in the back and she is escorted back to me by the hostess. She looked great. Blonde hair looking sharp. She had been down the shore for the weekend, so she was more tan than when I last saw her. She wore a blue dress with matching earrings and high heels. I was thinking, Is this how she dresses up for dinner? I’m in. We both automatically went in for the “greeting kiss” which felt natural.

Great thing was, on Sunday they do mix and match with some of their dishes so we could get some small bites and share different things. We caught up and had good conversation. I noticed that she has really nice hands. That’s a big one for me. A person’s hands tell a great deal about their health and lifestyle. I don’t know how I escaped that one myself!

Anyway, the food was great. We even ordered a pair of double Espolon tequilas on the rocks! I was happy to be with her, and after a couple of hours we wrapped it up. She was parked a few blocks away so I naturally walked her to her car. We decided that we wanted to see each other again and maybe do something in the way of the Fringe Festival, (which I don’t really care for) or a street festival or a matinée on a Saturday, (which I love).

We got to her car, and said goodbye. We hugged and kissed and it was nice. I remember her hugging me tightly and I could feel that she really liked me. (Well she did ‘Super Like’ me on Tinder!) So she took off and I walked home. It felt good. This could be a nice normal relationship if it gets going. But I’m not going to rush it or anything. I like a nice slow dating arc.

There is only a few concerns. I am not feeling any euphoria when it comes to this lady. I’m accustomed to that when I am seeing someone. Also… I am not thrilled that on our last two dates her wallet never came out. Not even a little help? Even my last girlfriend who was much younger than me kicked in because going out is expensive. It’s 2016!

So we’ll see…

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every Monday at 9am EST.

I publish new Dating content every Monday at 9am EST. I publish Updates and bios and stories about related characters, such as male and female friends and acquaintances on Wednesdays at 9am EST.

Rebecca – Chapter 1 – Dark Wings of Destiny

Another tale of one man’s journey navigating his way through the dating scene in Philadelphia.

Here is still another Tinder date. It’s like I’ve been on a Tinder bender! What if we call that a “Binder” from now on? Do you think that could catch on? I can’t take credit for that SNL winning catch phrase. That honor goes to my ex-girlfriend, Michelle. She wrote that bit. It’s really good. There are girls that say they are funny and there are girls that are funny. Michelle doesn’t have time for bullshit so she sees the truth and the irony in the same minute. P.S.Don’t Bother. Her saga will begin at the end of October.

Out of all of the posts I’ve written, this one is by far my favorite.

So I’ve been swiping right a lot lately. I look at this way, if I say yes to everyone it improves my odds of making more contacts. It’s like sales, if you just call on the clients who have stuff you like,you won’t close as many deals. But if you call on as many clients as possible, your close rate will rise. Sure I get some women whose profiles scream swipe left, but I just never reach out to them when it comes up a match. I hope I never hear from them but if I do I simply ignore them. Fickle bastard that I am.

So Rebecca came up as a match. She’s much younger than I am so I immediately think she’s looking for a sugar daddy. There are several girls looking for that on Tinder. It’s really just a nice was to say prostitute. So my guard is up and I’m ready for the inevitable. So if I’m even the slightest bit interested in a woman I will simply say hello and wait. She got back to me in under an hour.

I always ask the same question. “What prompted you to swipe right on my profile?” Her response was, “I like gentlemen, I’m an aspiring artist, writer and musician, and I love exploring Philadelphia.” Normally that sounds like the perfect girl for me. But I’m still prepared for the red flags that could unfurl at any moment. I tell her about myself and ask her another one of my classic questions: “What do you like to do in your free time?” If the answer is shopping, sleeping, or getting drunk with her friends, she’s probably a crazy loser, or simply a young person. But she says: “I like to go to the museums here. I enjoy the theatre. I draw and sing, mostly opera. I’m also in grad school at UPenn.” She says the Barnes is amazing. Agreed. Who doesn’t want to see a billion dollar art collection all procured by one guy? That place once won me the interest of my last girlfriend. Took her there on our first date. I’ll write extensively about her in a future post.

So I ask her if she’d like to tour a museum with me sometime.

She responds: “Gladly!”

The next thing I wrote was my cell number. Within a few minutes she text me: “Hi, it’s Rebecca.” So I’m thinking maybe this is where she solicits me to be her sugar daddy. I asked her what her schedule is like and she responds that it is a bit of a disaster. I’m like, here we go. She said she was on her way back to New Jersey to go to her nursing job that she works on Saturdays and Sundays. She works as a nurse in an emergency room. Impressive.

We hammer out our schedules and settle on Wednesday 9/14 at 4:30 at the Philadelphia Museum of Art. I think Wednesdays are still ‘Pay as you wish’ so that’s a good thing. I asked if I should just text her that day to confirm and she said yes but wanted to still talk between now and then. I loved that. She also said she wanted to hear more about me and wanted to know about my writing. I told her about what I’ve written in the past and how I currently write a blog. But of course I didn’t tell her what the blog was about. So we chatted back and forth over the next few days. I basically hear from her everyday. It’s refreshing and I like the attention because it’s not overkill. So she gave me her email and I sent her a copy of a screenplay I wrote a few years ago. Well… a lot of years ago!

Even over the weekend she was texting me about her shifts at the hospital and how she had begun reading it. Now that I’m reading her texts on my phone it looks like she has texted me everyday since we connected. She even said that it was so nice to meet a man who appreciates a lady of culture. I told her she is a ‘rare flower’ these days, just to sink the hook.

So we’ve been chatting all the way up to today when she texted me this morning with “Hey! See you tonight!” So it’s on people. I pray that she isn’t crazy or a hooker, but this seems too smooth. If she is nuts or eccentric I’ll be disappointed. All this contact and chatter I hope she is what I hope her to be. But if this blog suddenly stops, please call the authorities because maybe I’ve been murdered and I’m floating face down in the Schuylkill like a kid home from college on Thanksgiving in Manayunk.

I’m going to go hop in the shower and get into character. I’ll finish this after tonight’s date.

Tune in tomorrow for Part II of this exciting trilogy.

 

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I publish new Dating content every Monday at 9am EST. I publish Updates and bios and stories about Non-Dating related characters, such as male and female friends, on TuesdaysWednesdays at 9am EST.

Katsumi – Church Mess

Another tale of one man’s journey navigating his way through the dating scene in Philadelphia.

I also met this lovely lady on Tinder. She’s age appropriate and seems nice. We chatted online and then exchanged numbers and made a date last night after my 2nd date with Valerie. (Forgive me, but the blog is called PhicklePhilly. It’s what I do.)

Her profile reads:

Recently separated after a long marriage. Looking for a nice, kind, compassionate, loving, forgiving (I am working on this), humble and positive man. I like to jog, hike, walk, bike and other outdoor activities. I also enjoy cooking, movies, restaurants, traveling, etc. I love to try new things…

Oh I got some new things for you to try…

That’s a tall order to follow for any man. But if there is one man who is up to the job, it’s me. Or, at least I’m up to sending my very best representative out on a date with her this Saturday.  I asked her to have brunch with me on Saturday and she said yes! I asked her what was a good timeframe for her, and she said whatever time works for me. Good answer. I also asked her to come to Philly from Jersey. She said she will comply. So this could be good. Or bad. Either way I’m looking forward to meeting her.  So I may write about this after our date this Saturday.

The Date

So I have had a very interesting week. I should almost blog everyday just to cover it all. I almost want to make Phicklephlly an encompassing blog about all aspects of my life instead of a blog about a bunch of girls I meet. For now I’ll stay here. But I assure you, like anything else humans do, we evolve. This blog will evolve just as I have over this lifetime. So be prepared for that. How many women can I write about? And why? I looked at my list the other night. Everyone I’ve met in the last fifteen years. Not everybody is worth the list. this wont be greatest hits or anything like that but I won’t waste your time with boring characters

I got a text from Katsumi friday night. It was around 10pm. She asked if we were still meeting up Saturday. I had neglected to send the calendar invite. I like that she was attentive. I responded that I was just thinking of her and was in the process of sending. i picked Square 1682 and sent. She immediately accepted. Well done Katsumi. The jury is still out. We chat a bit on text but it looks like it’s going down.

I woke up this morning and went back to sleep. That is something I’d love to hear from everyone I know who works hard every week. I knew one thing. I had a brunch date with Katsumi at 2pm at Square 1682. Saturday, September 10.

Square 1682 is my go to bar in the city. Hands down. For the most part the entire machine works for me and my friends. So Katsumi and I have a brunch date and I lock down on Square. I looked at the brunch menu and saw one thing. Fried Chicken and biscuits. I’m in. They know me. I have to do it because I want that.

I visited a friend of mine at her work and caught up. Her office is a block away from square so I was close. She wished me well and I headed to Square. I arrived at 1:50.  My father taught me well about punctuality. I just realized my fathers obsession with the clock was his own OCD and insecurity about every thing. I guess I’ll deal with that in a later blog.

I’m there and instead of taking a seat at the bar like I always do I get a table. ar first I sat at a table by the window but I was crushed by the sunlight so I moved.

So I’m at my table and I order the bubbly rose just to get a base coat on to meet the lady. 2:10. She is late. 2:20 she says she is on 17th street. 2:30 and a glass of porsecco in and she is trying to park. She says Delancey and I’m like WTF but I’m assuming now that she parked her car or van at 17th and pine. So she’s still 4 blocks away. I am going to resist making any racist stereotypical remarks here.

Now as I said before, I’m a stickler for the clock. It’s now almost 2:50 and I am pissed and red flagging this woman like there is no tomorrow. Other than her getting stuck in a traffic jam caused by a presidential motorcade, there is no excuse for being this late. I was angry, disappointed. I hate this!

And then she walked in.

Asian. Raven hair. Fair skin. Pretty face. Petite. And most of all…great legs.

All is forgiven and well worth the wait. She looks 10 years younger than her actual age. She was wearing a light summer top, red shorts and high heels. She’s looks to be around 90 to 100 pounds tops. She apologized profusely for being so late. Complaining about all the traffic and difficulty finding parking. I didn’t even care at that point. She’s a beauty and I want her.

So I order a cider. Square 1682 has this great cider. It comes in a 12 oz. can. I drink it over rocks. I’m not a huge fan of cider, but I could drink oceans of this stuff. It’s from Franklin Vineyards. It’s dry, 6 % alcohol, 3 mg of carbs, 3 grams of sugar. But it’s not sweet. It is a crisp effervescent delicious beverage for a hot day. If you ever go there, order it.

She sticks to water and orders the calamari. I of course go for the cracking good fried chicken and biscuits. We chat and I begin to learn more about her. She is Chinese and her people came to America by way of Malaysia. She has been married for like 18 years. They are separated and soon to be divorced. But the last few years they have been sleeping in separate bedrooms. Man, I know what that shit’s like. Thank goodness I have been divorced since 2001. Anyway, It seems like her husband is a sociopath and she’s just burned out with all of his nonsense. He seems like manipulative prick. But as you know there are always three sides to every story. Your side, my side and the truth. She still lives in their house but he has left and gotten his own place. The house if free and clear, but he still pays all of the bills. So he can’t be a total asshole. But based on what she’s told me about how he once had a restraining order against her and other stuff, he’s probably somewhat of an asshole. But in Jersey anybody can get a retraining order against anybody.  She has two sons. 16 and 13. Apparently the older one has high-end autism. So he’s really smart but has difficulty expressing himself emotionally and socially. Which must be heartbreaking for a parent. She has him 75% of the time and the 13-year-old 50% of the time. So some how that works out. I know she had them both over the Labor Day weekend before they went back to school. Because we had been texting for a couple of weeks, and this was the weekend she had a free Saturday. Happy she chose me to spend some time with today.

I asked her how her experience has been on Tinder and she said up and down. The first person she ever spoke to on there was 62 years old. They never met but he helped her get through the pain of her separation when it was intense. So I thank you Mr. 62 yr old dude. You cleared the way for me so I don’t have to listen to that shit. She chatted with some Muslim guy for a while but they never met either. So she may have gone on a few dates here and there but she said she went off tinder for awhile so I don’t know. She hasn’t been that active. She said if she sees a guy showing off his car, his house, his muscles or his tattoos, she will always swipe left. So that gives me hope for humanity.

She lives in South Jersey and I appreciated her coming to Philly to see me after only a short time. She said normally she would meet someone for coffee just in case it didn’t go well she could make a quick exit. I told her I usually followed the same line of thinking for a first meeting. Even lunch is good because you can be in and out in an hour. She said she had to do something with her son at 6pm but could hang until after 5. I was happy with that. She asked how many people had I met on Tinder and I told her I spoke with some women but she was the first one I actually wanted to meet. I said that because I am a lying swine and I want her to think she’s in some way special.

She did have an accent but I liked it. She asked if she looked like her photos. I told her she looked better and younger than her pics. She liked that. She said I looked much better than my photos. She also liked that I had shaved off my beard. So that’s a positive. She asked my age and said I looked much younger. So I hope she is getting a good vibe for the Phickle Man. She seemed very interested in connecting with me on Facebook. So we did. She immediately started sniffing around my profile and going through my photos. I mean, I don’t give a shit and I’m not that into social media anymore, but right there in the restaurant? She’s looking at pic of my daughter and pulls up one from Christmas 2008 when Michelle (former girlfriend. Don’t worry. We’ll cover that in the next month or so and it will be epic!) She’s like, “who’s that?” I told her. “You are with a bunch of women.” I told her I know a lot of women and have many women as friends because I connect well emotionally with women and I’m not a wolf. I have nothing to hide on my stupid Facebook. All the secrets are in locked files that only I can see anyway.

I did get her giggling a few times during brunch which I loved .She’s like, “You’re funny.” Chicks like to laugh. That much is true. If you ask any woman what she’s looking for in a man and she’ll probably at some point say: “A good sense of humor.” That is absolute bullshit. They just want a hot guy. Most guys that are hot don’t have to develop at all and get all the ass they want. They don’t need to be funny or smart. They just need to show up. Same goes for hot women. The rest of us have to continue to evolve and grow and develop good personalities and learn sensitivity and kindness and compromise. But I digress…

Even though I’ve already gone on a 2nd date with Valerie and I like her and she is nice, Katsumi is kinda hot. Like when I’m with Valerie I feel calm and safe. I’m with a mature level-headed woman. But with Katsumi, I’m like giddyup!  She gets my motor running. That is the drug I love. I like Valerie and she is probably the better choice, but the heart wants what it wants, and I’m hot for Katsumi. She’s a nice looking lady, so I’m as shallow as the rest of them.

But…here’s the thing that could be the deal breaker with this babe. She said early on that she was very religious. She said Sundays are reserved for church. The whole day??? Based on my experience, religious women are just not a match for me. I am a Godless heathen. My ex-wife is very religious and that did not go well. You would think someone who was that into God would be a little nicer, but then again, all of the wars that started because of religion have killed more people than any of the wars about anything else.  So I just can’t play on that team. But, if Katsumi’s faith and beliefs are important to her, then I will respect her fairy tales. Hell, I’ll even go to church a few times if she will unlawfully lay with me in my bed of sin. (cue up: Heaven & Hell by Black Sabbath)

Anyway, that’s the only snag I see. She said maybe I could come over to Jersey next time. I told her I was down. I could do Zip Car or Patco. Whatever baby wants. I like that she said that there will be a next time.

I walked her to her mini van, (I know!) which was nice, because it gave me a little more time with her and also to check out those shapely gams. So we hugged and I sent her on her way. I told her I liked her and wanted to see her again.

Normally there is a level of euphoria when I meet someone new. But I start to review the entire date in my head and sometimes red flags pop up. Stay tuned we’ll see what happens with this one. If I don’t write about her again you’ll know I lost interest. The whole, “I’m very religious and Sunday is my church day” is really sending a strong message to me that she is not a match for me.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday at 9am EST.

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Valerie – Love Me Tinder – Date 2

Another tale of one man’s journey through the dating scene in Philadelphia, searching

So here we are after my 2nd date with lovely Valerie. Last night we went out again. This time to the movies. (Her idea!) On our first date she said she would email me with what film she wanted to see. We both love film so I trust her judgement.

I headed down to the Ritz 5 in Society Hill. I stopped into the box office and picked up our tickets around 6:30, and then walked across the street to Positano Coast for a beer before the film. I met her at the theater at 6:50 and we headed in. She didn’t want any snacks and I was fine with that. She sort of picked where we sat and I was fine with that as well.

The film was The Light Between Oceans. It was good. A bit long, 2:13 running time. The cinematography was solid, the score was strong. But here’s the thing… It was a heartbreaking story. If you want to be sad and hurt, by all means go see this film. But I was with her and she was so well-behaved. Well behaved in the movie theater is super important to me. She was on time. Quiet and still during the show. Unlike that mess Carol from last Tuesday’s blog.

So after the movie we just sort of walked around in circles in Society Hill just catching up and chatting. It’s refreshing to be around someone who is a peer. What have I been thinking dating these younger women? It’s nice to have a conversation with someone who has a shared experience of life, career, marriage, divorce, kids, etc.

So it was getting a bit late. And when I say late I mean like, 9:30 on a school night. We stopped into Cavanaugh’s for a nightcap. We went upstairs and she had an Amstel Light and I had the house chardonnay.

I expressed to her that I was working on a new work opportunity and I had a very early Thursday. I wanted to make it very clear I wasn’t trying to bail or leave early. I told her I liked her and I enjoyed spending time with her. She was fine with it and she said she was tired too. She even said “We went to the early show and I’m yawning!” So we got out of there and I walked her to her door. We had a sweet goodnight kiss, and I told her I’d be in touch. I was going to take her to brunch on Saturday, and I told her that, but she is going to her son’s sporting event. I’m glad I told her that I was interested in her and wanted to see her again. So it’ll probably be some sort of food oriented date next.

I enjoy the long arc when it comes to dating. I want to see a woman and spend time with her until it slowly simmers and then comes to a boil in an explosion of lust and pulchritude. It’s just the way I am. The beginning is the best part. The courtship. The thrust and parry of our words and glances. A touch here, a stolen kiss there…and then ignition!

So like last week, this is a bonus blog that just happened last night so I wanted to crack it off as soon as possible to you dear readers. It wasn’t very long but this relationship will probably be a solid, no drama build up.

But in true PhicklePhilly tradition, I have a brunch date with a pretty Asian girl on Saturday, so there may be another bonus blog on Sunday!  Have a great weekend everyone.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday at 9am EST.

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Carol – There’s No Fun in Dysfunction – Part I

Another tale of one man’s journey navigating his way through the dating scene in Philadelphia.

I was introduced to Carol by a friend of mine who works as an event director for a center city restaurant. I was literally sitting at the bar and my friend walks up with Carol, and says “Can you babysit this one for a while and I’ll meet you next door in a little bit.” Carol and I immediately hit it off and were chatting and laughing. We went to Square 1682 for a drink. Carol seemed fun. She has  a nice face, long brown hair she’s probably 5’4″ green eyes and is somewhat voluptuous. Very busty. She recently cut her hair to shoulder length and donated it to make wigs for cancer kids, so that’s a nice gesture.

I liked her well enough. She was bubbly and fun to be around. I did notice that her regular speech was peppered with profanity to the point where I would have to say something. I can trust a person that uses the whole language but too much cursing is just a lazy mind’s way of expressing itself. Something I also noticed that when she would drink she’d become very intense about whatever it was she was talking about. Sometimes it seemed overpowering and I can see how that would drive people away from her. But we had fun that night and I saw a green light so I went in for a kiss but she deflected it. I thought I saw a green light but apparently it was turning from yellow to red!

So after that night I didn’t see her for a while but I ran into her one evening. She was coming from her latest job and was on her way home. She worked at some start-up here in the city. We chatted and decided to have a drink. We get there and she is drinking, and getting excited and loud and as usual a little profane. It was actually painful for me to be sitting there. I was feeling stressed just listening to her. Then she saw someone she knew outside and went out to chat with them. We were in a bar I frequent so I was comfortable sitting there by myself. The bartender even looked at me like; “Dude, I feel your pain.” She got me a whiskey just to soothe my nerves.

Carol had mentioned she was supposed to meet her friend for birthday drinks down at some bar down in midtown village or as some call it the gayborhood. Her friend who was having the birthday is gay so it would stand to reason. I can’t remember the name of the place but it’ll come to me. Carol hadn’t come back from whoever she was talking to outside and I wanted to go see my friend who worked the door over at Ashton Cigar Bar, so I settled up at Square 1682 and text Carol that I had to leave. Frankly I was relieved to get away from her.

So I’m chatting with my friend at Ashton sipping a drink and smoking a cig so I’m calm and happy now. Carol texts me and asks me what I’m doing. I tell her I’m at Ashton. I know I shouldn’t have done that but I had already had a few drinks in me and was feeling fine on a Friday. So she comes to Ashton and gets carded by my friend. As a sidebar here my friend has a good job but was bouncing just as a part-time gig. Anyone you ever met who has worked at a bar knows it’s a tough job. You have to deal with a bunch of drunk and arrogant people some of the time. So when Carol gave him a hard time when he carded her and may have called him an asshole, my buddy wanted to toss her out. But I smoothed things out. But his tolerance for that kind of nonsense is very low.

Carol begged me to go to the birthday thing with her and I was like what the hell by then. So I agreed. I find that the more alcohol I consume the easier it is to deal with her volatility. So we walked over and her friend was there. Surprisingly enough it was a great place. The people were friendly and I was having a good time. I even ran into a guy I had met in my business network there with his friend whom until that moment I didn’t know was gay.  I believe in live and let live, but when you’re in a bar you would never go to and you’re like, “I know that dude.” “Wait… that dude’s gay?”

Anyway we had a good old-time there and later Carol jumped in a taxi and I walked home.

 

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Valerie – Love me Tinder – Date 1

Another tale of one man’s journey navigating his way through the dating scene in Philadelphia.

Hello! So here we are with another installment of Phicklephilly! It’s off the regular schedule of every Tuesday but this just happened. So let’s just jump into it. I recently went on Tinder. A friend of mine told me about it. Actually, he’s not a friend, he’s more an acquaintance. Actually he’s some sleazy lawyer that attached himself to me like a sea lamprey so he could get into events and eat and drink for free.

So I downloaded the app and set up a profile. I was honest about who I am and what I’m looking for on the site.  Well not totally, but after much thought I went with “LTR.” Long term relationship. Actually in truth I would just like to date a bit and then, and only then if I really click with someone it will become a long-term relationship. Some people want hook ups and some want casual dating and others want LTR. But lets face it people, Everybody wants a long term relationship. No matter how many ways you can deny it or say, “I just can’t” or “I’m not ready” that’s all bullshit. Unless you are just a wicked person that is mean and mentally ill and a felon or violent or on some sort of controlled substance and because you can’t break from your addiction you want to be in a LTR.

And I’ll tell you why. Remember the rush of falling in love? Yea. It’s the greatest drug in the world. Take it from someone has fallen in love many times. It’s amazing. The excitement the butterflies, the raw euphoria of falling in love with someone. There is nothing like it. The only thing that for me ever came close is playing rock on stage with my band and people are cheering about some song you wrote in your bedroom when you were broken-hearted because Linda isn’t returning your phone calls anymore.

So I’m on Tinder to go on a few dates and see what happens, but we all know bottom line… it’s either hell yea or hell no. Anybody that tells you different is either nuts or is still wounded from  past relationship. We’re sentient beings. We’re an extremely social species. We need to be loved. We yearn for it. And anybody that doesn’t believe that is a liar.

So there are a few things you can do on Tinder. People’s pictures come up and so does their bio if they have one. one your phone you swipe right if you like them or swipe left if you are not interested. But… there is a little blue star icon at the bottom of the page and if you REALLY like someone, you can hit the star button and Super Like them. That’s what Valerie did to me.

So that’s a good thing. She has a good job, is attractive and age appropriate. We’ve been chatting a little bit on the site and have even exchanged cell numbers. So we set up a date to meet for a drink at the Liberte bar at Sofitel hotel. That date is tonight at 5:30. So I will write more tomorrow after the date takes place and we see how it goes.

The Date

It was humid out as it has been lately, so around 3:30 I took a taxi up to 16th and Chestnut Street. It took forever because of the traffic. I hopped out and walked over to 15th and Market. I stopped at a street cart and grabbed a hot dog because I was hungry. Not too hungry and I didn’t want to feel bloated.  Just a light snack to wear as drinking armor. I walked south on 15th street. I do have to say, if there is one street I hate to walk on 15th street between Market and Chestnut. It’s just an ugly space. I don’t really want to go into why at this point but if you are ever there you’ll get it. I turned right on Ranstead, which between 15th and 16th is nothing more than a filthy alley. As I walked along I saw the back of 1517 Chestnut street. It’s just a door with a doorbell. But I know it better as an Asian massage parlor that is simply a black door on Chestnut next to 5 Guys Burgers. So apparently you can come in one door and go out the other! (future blog) I stopped up to see my friend Kelly. ( Kelly will be featured in a future blog) She works on 16th at a beauty salon. I chatted with her a bit and then headed to Davio’s on 17th street. I wanted to get a base coat on just to take the edge off, so I ordered a martini. My favorite bartender there was on shift and he always makes me a great one. And the best part? It’s only $6.60. That is an incredible price for a martini in this city. Normally you’d pay twice that. My friend Carly who also works there, (future blog post) stopped to say hello. I told her I had to go soon because I had a date across the street at Sofitel at 5:30. She said if it didn’t go well I could count on her to extract me from the situation. So after two martinis I was more than ready to go. I really wanted to smoke a cigarette, but I thought it prudent not to because you never get a second chance to make a first impression. So I walked over to Sofitel. The bar was dead. I was glad because I wanted to be somewhere quiet so we could chat. I ordered a glass of their house chardonnay. Another nice thing they do at Sofitel is put some assorted snacks on the bar. A rare occurrence these days.

Valerie arrived at 5:30. Looked good. Looked better than her pics. Her blonde hair was longer than I remembered. She ordered a glass of red and we started chatting. We covered the usual stuff. It is easier when you both are from the same generation. There was laughter and some kisses exchanged. This is brand new so I am being careful what I write here. Normally I’ll go all guns blazing, but what if this really turns into something. We seemed to hit it off. What if after this I’m not fickle anymore? Wait… I’m getting ahead of myself here.  So after two martinis at Davio’s and three glasses of wine at Sofitel, I was a little tipsy. So things are a little fuzzy. At one point I asked her if she still “Super Liked” me. She smiled and said yes! So after a couple of hours we wrapped it up and said our goodbyes.

But… not before she got me email and locked down another date for next week! Yes. Her idea! We are going out again next Wednesday. She wants to go to the movies. Perfect! I love film. The date will be at 7:30 and she says she’ll send me info on what movie we’re going to see. So I’ll be covering that here too!

This has been an unexpected twist in the writing of this blog. I was only going to publish once a week but now I feel like when these events occur in real-time I should post them immediately as sort of a bonus to my readers. I’ll cover the usual tales each week but when something breaks that’s hot. I’ll drop it right away!

The game is afoot!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday at 9am EST.

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Maria – Chapter 1 – Amor en Vano – Part I

Another tale of one man’s journey, as he navigates through the dating scene in Philadelphia, searching for true love.

I work in advertising. A colleague and I normally go out to lunch at some of the local eateries here in center city. We have a list of spots we like and there is one in particular that we really like. There’s this one server that I started to like. We both thought she was great. After awhile we would ask to be seated in her section every time we went there.

Maria was always on point with the service and friendly. She’s a beautiful hispanic girl. Dark brown hair that tumbled to her shoulders like ribbons of bittersweet chocolate. She has light caramel skin and is very fit. She runs most days so she’s in great shape.

When her section would slow down, she would always spend a little extra time with us to chat. We loved the attention from such a sweet girl.

I have many contacts and clients throughout the city. One of which is a tanning salon. Maria said she’d like to check it out and I got her a free pass to go tanning. She gave me her contact info so that I could set it up.

I sometimes get tickets to events through my job. Maria had expressed an interest in going to the Philadelphia Flower Show. So when my co-worker got tickets because they were advertising with us he gave me a pair. I called Maria and asked her if she’d like to go. She accepted!

We met at the convention center and she was on time, which I like. We went in and checked her backpack. We grabbed a couple of glasses of wine and walked around the event. It was really nice to spend time with this girl that I only ever spoke to at her job. Here she was with me and we were getting to know each other. I was happy. During the event I remember she mentioned to me that she had lost her “M” necklace. Not at the event, but somewhere else. I thought about how great it would be to replace that for her. But I was getting ahead of myself.

We looked at some beautiful small orchids that she showed a fondness for. I made mental notes for future romantic gift ideas in case that wonderful idea ever occurred. I also signed up for some sort of green energy thing and they gave me a single little rose in a vial and I gave it to her. (First flower!)

A few weeks went by and I would see her at the restaurant when we would go there. I asked her to another event that I got tickets to through work. Due to scheduling conflicts she was unable to attend.

Some more time went by, and one day we went to the restaurant and one of the other servers told us Maria had been fired. We were shocked because we thought she had been one of their best and long-term employees. We asked why and she said, “For drinking on the job.”

Now I know a lot of bartenders and restaurant employees in this city and the policy in regard to drinking on the job vary. I spoke with one bartender who works at bar up by Temple University and she said, where she works she can do the occasional shot with the clients if they insist. She said she comes out from behind the bar and does it with them. If by chance the booze is clear in color and she is pouring the shots she will make sure hers is water if possible.  I spoke with another bartender who works at a nice hotel bar here in center city the same question. He said, “Look, if it’s you guys, (I have known him for several years and the guy I was with is a local liquor rep) I can do the occasional shot to taste something new with you.” But other than that it’s prohibited.

So I decided to get to the bottom of this new development in Maria’s life. I texted her and asked “Are you no longer at the restaurant anymore?”  She got back to me rather quickly saying “Yea about that. It’s a joke. I’ll have to tell you the full story then.”

I was interested to find out, but more so to see her outside of the restaurant, one on one! But I also decided to do something else during our meeting. Because fortune favors the bold.

We agreed to meetup the next day at a Starbucks. I got there first and she arrived shortly after. I don’t really drink coffee. I like the smell and taste of it and have drank it in the past, but I just don’t NEED it like most people. If someone said to me,”you can never have coffee again.” I’d be like, “no big deal.” But if the said, “no more wine again ever.” Dude. We’ve got a problem.

Anyway, she arrives and she has this cute tan summer dress on and she looks incredibly hot. So we get our coffees and sit down. She begins to tell me her side of the story. And like any story, there’s her side, the restaurant’s side, and the truth. She said that everybody does it. And they decided to make an example out of her to drive home the message that drinking with the patrons was strictly forbidden. If they would fire a long-term senior employee for the infraction, then anyone could be let go at anytime. Pretty effective message.

Tune in on Wednesday for Part II of this story. What is our hero planning on doing at the coffee shop?

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am EST.

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