Meet The Tinder Prostitutes

Guess what these women on Tinder really mean when they say ‘80 roses an hour’? Hint: it’s got nothing to do with flowers

Sarah went on Tinder for the same reason lots of women our age do – to find out how many single guys there were in her local area and to have an easy, safe way to get in contact with them. But, unlike lots of girls, Sarah doesn’t want to find single men because she looking for a boyfriend. She doesn’t even want a no-strings hookup – at least not in the way you’d think. Unlike you’re average user, when Sarah sleeps with a guy she meets on Tinder she leaves with much more than new number in her a phone and a funny sex story to tell her mates – she leaves with a pocketful of cash. Because unlike most 24-year-old girls using Tinder, Sarah’s a prostitute and she’s using the hookup app to lure in clients.

 

‘It made so much sense – where else do you basically have a database of all the down to fuck men in your area?’

‘Tinder has at least doubled my business,’ Sarah, who had a job in a strip bar before becoming a prostitute four years ago, explains to The Debrief. ‘In the last week alone, I’ve seen 12 clients all from Tinder and have earned over £1,000. I got the idea from a friend of mine who’s also on the game. I think she actually joined Tinder to find a boyfriend or whatever, but was sent dozens of messages from guys asking for no-strings sex, threesomes or naked pictures – there was basically no romance there at all. She just thought to herself “I’m not getting anywhere using Tinder to find a bloke, why don’t I just use it to boost business?” It made so much sense – where else do you basically have a database of all the down to fuck men in your area? – and she found it so easy I thought I might as well give it a go. I just made a profile, wrote caption that made it kind of obvious what I do for a living, matched everyone who I was OK sleeping with and then waited for matches to get in contact with me. I know more and more prostitutes are cottoning on as well – it’s made my job insanely easy.’

There have been reports for some time that Tinder has been being used this way over the globe. New Mexico State Senator Jacob Candelaria specifically blasted the app in his attempt to ‘clean up’ dating websites which allow the soliciting of sex. He told KOB Eyewitness News 4, ‘Our laws can’t and don’t keep pace with technological advancement and there will always be people looking to exploit those loopholes. We’re weak. Our courts have said our pimping laws are not applicable to the internet.’

And it looks like the same thing’s happening here, but should we be surprised? The dating app’s anonymity and pure reach make it a natural fit for sex workers. If you’ve ever borrowed your male mate’s phone to ‘play’ Tinder from the other side of the fence, you’ve no doubt come across a few of the profiles yourself. In between the ordinary profiles, you’ll find one or two pictures of lingerie-clad women provactively posing for selfies. That in itself isn’t exactly unusual, but what sets these profiles apart is what the women are offering in their ‘about’ section.

I was blown away by how quick, easy and transparent it could be to buy sex over Tinder

The ‘kind of obvious’ messages that prostitutes use to distinguish themselves from other girls’ profiles are easy to spot once you know the (admittedly, not hugely subtle) code. In London, at least, they’re easily identifiable by a proclivity for using rose emojis. Descriptions I have come across when I was researching this feature include ‘[rose emoji] 80 roses for the best night of your life’, ‘90 [rose emoji] for BBBJ’ [meaning bare back blowjob – blowjobs without a condom – according to Sarah] and ‘80 roses for an hour, GFE [Sarah says this is for a girlfriend experience] [rose emoji].’ In case you still haven’t figured it out – ‘roses’ mean ‘pounds sterling’.

Using my male housemate’s Tinder account, I was able to chat to three prostitues in one day and was blown away by how quick, easy and transparent it could be to buy sex over Tinder. On all three occasions, the process was the same – match with the girl, chat to them over Tinder about what I wanted and how much they would charge and then they’d send me a mobile number to ring and an address to go to. The price ranged from £70 for an hour with, extras such as blowjobs or anal increasing the price to over £100, to £300 for the entire evening and a full ‘girlfriend experience’. I was able to negotiate these prices without leaving my sofa or even speaking to the girl and that seems to be the point – it’s remarkable how easy Tinder makes it for users to skip the chit-chat and just pay a stranger for sex – all without deviating away from their iPhone.

For Sarah, the appeal seems to be that Tinder allows her to sell sex for cash while remaining anonymous and slipping past any interference from the police. ‘I had always worked at brothels or kerb-crawled before I started using Tinder, which was a nightmare, because you’d have to deal with hassle from the police. I’ve been in a brothel once when it was raided and it’s not an experience I’d like to repeat. And being shooed away by police on street corners is fucking boring. I’ve tried Gumtree and other websites, but they’re now really hot on closing down profiles that are soliciting sex. Tinder lets me get on with it completely privately – they message me, we chat, they come round, I shag them – or sometimes even just chat because it’s not always about the sex – and then they leave. It’s not traceable.’

When anyone reports Sarah’s profile and Tinder shuts it down, all she does is make another Facebook profile and get right back on.

The laws around prostitution in England and Wales are far from simple. The act of prostitution is not in itself illegal – but there are certain laws that criminalise activities around it. Under the Sexual Offences Act 2003, it is an offence to cause or incite prostitution or control it for personal gain, and the 1956 Sexual Offences Act prohibits running a brothel and it’s against the law to loiter or solicit sex on the street. So selling sex on Tinder is not only completely within the parameters of the law, it allows these women to bypass any legal issues they might have selling sex through ‘traditional means’. No wonder Sarah finds it so appealing. For their part, Tinder is clear that such activities are against the app’s terms of service, which forbids commercial solicitation of any kind including ‘advertising or soliciting any user to buy or sell any products or services not offered by the Company’. Not that that’s had any affect on Sarah – when anyone reports her profile and Tinder shuts it down, all she does is make another Facebook profile and get right back on. It’s difficult to see how Tinder can keep on top of policing it.

So it certainly seems to be functional for Sarah, but what affect is it having on her emotionally? Using Tinder to solicit clients strips away what little face-to-face communication Sarah had with the people she’s about to have sex with so it becomes completely transactional – almost like doing a supermarket shop. Is she worried about what emotional damage she might be doing to herself? ‘Sometimes I think they forget that there’s an actual human behind the profile and there are times when it hasn’t been ideal,’ she admits. ‘People troll you a bit, but it comes with the territory and I just block them, because it’s a waste of my time. But even in person, people aren’t always very nice. When you meet with clients in the brothel or on the street, they obviously know what you look like in “real life”, but I admit that the pictures I used on my Tinder profile show me looking at my absolute best and, sometimes, the guys are disappointed with what they see when they arrive. Mainly all that people do is make a unkind joke about my appearance – which I can handle – but on one occasion someone actually left, which was obviously a bit shitty. And I do worry about my safety, but if I’m concerned, my male neighbor – who is a good mate – has a key to my house and I just text him if I feel intimidated and he gets rid of them.’

Interestingly, Sarah says that the sex she has through Tinder tends to be more ‘vanilla’ than some of the requests she had when she was working in a brothel. ‘I used to get people asking for weird stuff – one guy wanted me to wank him off into his own mouth– when I was in a brothel, but because the users on Tinder tend to be predominantly men in their twenties and thirties, they usually don’t want anything that niche. The most bizarre request I’ve had from Tinder was from a banker in his late twenties who wanted a classic sub-dom scenario and for me to urinate on him, but that’s not really a big deal to me. I got into this because I love sex and I have a really high sex drive. I get to have sex for a living and I absolutely love my job. Anyway, most of my friends on Tinder have sex with guys who then disappear off the face of the planet. The only difference between me and them is that I’m charging.’

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Tinder Is A Modern Day Whorehouse. I Said It.

Back when I was too small to see over the kitchen counter, I would often imagine the “Wild West” as an adventurous place, people traveling in covered wagons, panning for gold, building cities where no cities ever stood before.

But I didn’t daydream about whorehouses. Maybe I should have? They’ve been a part of human culture and countless civilizations since essentially forever. I’m sure T-Rex even had his go-to spots for his particular reptilian tastes. They’re not abnormal or historically rare, you just don’t like them.

The notion that a man’s sexual needs are no different or less important than his need for food has always been a business opportunity. It’s not called the world’s oldest sin, but the world’s oldest profession. Until we decided prostitution was somehow “wrong” and created laws and religious fist-shakes to shut it down. Because that would stop it, right?

I believe sex work should be legal. Not just legal, but strongly regulated. The health and safety of sex workers and their clients should be no less paramount than the health and safety of anyone else in a physically demanding job. We pay men millions of dollars to slam their bodies together, but we make them wear football helmets when they do it.

If sex work was legal, we could stop resting on an overstuffed sofa of “morals” that allows us some kind of mental comfort and superiority. Sex won’t be a normal, natural part of life if we say it shouldn’t be, right? That’ll change human behavior, right? If we could acknowledge that men pay women for sex anyway (and women pay men, too), then maybe the hungry men I deal with on a daily basis can get the fuck off Tinder,* where they think they can have anything they want for free.

Take this fine young man for example. He is a stranger. I’ve never met him before. That first message is the first thing I said to him. He only waited 22 words to mention his erection. I blocked him instantly and went on about my day, but the exchange bothered me, and I had trouble putting it out of my head. Maybe because it wasn’t the first, and I’m assuming (though hoping otherwise) that it won’t be the last.

Why did he think that was okay? What made him think that he could speak to a woman he didn’t know like that? What made him think he could impose upon her to sate his sexual need in that moment? What makes him not an exception, but one of innumerable men that think they’re being “forward,” when really they’re being inappropriate? Maybe it’s because Tinder is a modern day whorehouse.

Online dating apps are where (some) men go to get whatever sexual satisfaction they want. And it’s where (some) women go to provide it. Sound familiar? I’m basing this assumption on the fact that at some point this guy had his behavior rewarded, otherwise why try again? He was way too casual about it to be a newbie. The first guy to ever walk into a room and ask to pay for sex was either thrown out on his ass, or accepted as a customer. My money is on the latter.

I’ve already written on the topic of ethical non-monogamy. Married men seeking out more and different sex than they can have at home is also an activity best engaged in in a place where both parties enter for the same transaction. I use dating apps so that I can stop dating. Married men haven’t had to date in years. Call me crazy, but Ashley Madison was a brilliant idea. Keep all the sexually stifled marrieds in one pen, please, there’s no reason to have them mingle with the rest of the herd.

The specimen above however was really interesting to me. Single and busy, I totally get that. Maintaining a relationship or marriage at home when you travel more often than not would certainly be a struggle. But this guy wants contact. The company of a woman. In small doses. Do you see the goddamn theme here?

We are sitting ducks. Single women on dating apps are the most target rich environment on earth. Solicit, offend, entice, whatever her response, there are so many more where she came from. You can what do you want, consequence and debt-free. Anonymity, abundance, affordability. In ye olde days, you got your ass kicked if you left without paying. Now, you’re free to do and say what you like, to who you like, and nothing bad will happen to you. That’s where they get the nerve. That’s why men think they can open a conversation by asking us to text them through their morning masturbation. They need a different place to go. I did not sign up for this shit.

Some will argue, “But they do pay! Dating apps aren’t always free.” Fuck you and the delusion you rode in on. These men are paying more for Citibikes than what could mildly be described as phone sex. And I’m paying, too. I’m paying to be a maybe. Maybe she’ll sext me while I jack off. Maybe she’ll let me fuck her once a month when I’m home. And then say nothing, ask nothing, expect nothing at all. Least of all respect. And hey, if she won’t there are millions, literally millions more where she came from.

Do I have a solution to all of this? No. I simply crave honesty. Society lied to itself when it criminalized prostitution. It created a fantasy in its head and I’m old enough to see over the kitchen counter now. Wake up. Sex is free, but sometimes it shouldn’t be. If you’re using no more than a swipe of your thumb to instantly acquire it, that’s one of those times. We’re not restaurants you flip through on Seamless, we’re human beings. And single, female human beings looking for single, male human beings that conduct themselves with a modicum of respect do not deserve to be made to feel like they’re working in a profession they did not choose.

Let’s all stop imagining they’re “dating” apps, or just give me a place to interact with single men in a way that won’t make me want to send them a bill.

  • I use Tinder as a general reference to most dating apps. Much the same way you don’t call it a tissue, you call it a Kleenex.

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Real Life Sugar Babies Describe What It’s Like To Have A Sugar Daddy – Part 2

Sugaring Can Be A Win-Win

From handshoes101:

“Former sugar baby here!

It’s something I did for a few months, and it was a great way to help me out of a difficult financial situation.

To start off, before any sugar relationship starts, there is usually a platonic meet and greet over coffee/dinner/drinks so both parties can see if they actually like each other. Out of every 3 meet and greets I went to I probably only saw 1 again. There’s no sex and usually no money is exchanged (although I have been given money at meet and greets a few times). Sometimes you will also discuss allowance at the meet and greet, but you can also do this before or after.

Allowance is always agreed upon before any actual dates, and it can either be a monthly or weekly amount, or pay per meet (PPM). I used to always do PPM.

Once that’s all established, you start having dates with your sugar daddy. These can be anything from hotel meetups for just sex, to going to an art show, dinner, and drinks, before heading back to his place for sex. It’s never said out loud but sex is absolutely expected.

In my experience, most guys who are sugar daddies are very busy business men who don’t have the time or energy to sustain a real relationship. The money ensures that everything will go smoothly, and they still get a genuine (or what I make seem to be genuine) emotional, fun, and intimate experience.

I enjoyed sugaring when I did it, because it was a good way for me to make money, while still being in control of who I spent time with.

My regular rate was 500€ per date. For one sugar daddy that I really liked, I went down to 350€ because he wasn’t super rich, and that’s a more average number for my location (Berlin, Germany). I know that in some places in America the average per date can be as low as $200 or as high as $600. But even the local average isn’t the best guide for choosing a number, because it depends on what you value yourself at, what you’re comfortable with, what the daddy values you at, and what he can afford.

Also, monthly allowances are quite common, but I don’t have any personal experience with those. They depend on the same factors though, along with how many times you meet per month.”

Some Sugar Babies Get All The Perks

From misscolinsxx:

“It’s been on and off for me, my family is well off financially however I’m not the kind of person that would expect my mum to cater to my every whim and need so that’s why I decided to get a sugar daddy.

So the process or usually goes something like this, you go for lunch/dinner/drinks for a meet and greet and if you choose to continue then an arrangement will be discussed e.g meet me 5 times a month and I will pay you $500 per week, $10,000 monthly or $1000 PPM (pay per meet).

From then on your dates can range from holidays to going to a work function or simply going to the cinemas and dinner afterwards, essentially you’re an on call girlfriend/boyfriend.

My arrangement was that I meet him a few times a month in exchange for 5000€ (per month) which equates to just under $8000(he lived in Paris and I live in NZ) and I would get all the lovely perks such as shopping sprees at designer stores, cosmetic work, his black Amex card just whatever I wanted (within reason of course).”

Warm And Fuzzy On The Outside, Cold And Calculating On The Inside

From AmethystRose:

“I used to sugar, and escort – I’m taking a break from both because of mental health reasons.

Honestly, I’d prefer not to go into my stories too much. I’ve been in two long-term sugar arrangements – One at 16, one at 17. 700/800 per week + gifts, respectively, for roughly one date and one round of sex and post-sex cuddling. It wasn’t negotiated that way, it’s just what ended up happening. I did negotiate the money, though – silly little me actually negotiated down from 1.2k/1k respectively, because I thought too much cash lying around would tip off my parents. I was such a stupid f*cking child, ugh. Granted, I shouldn’t have been sugaring anyway, but you know.

Being a sugar baby is not work for just anyone. If you want to succeed in it, as an actual business venture, you need to be very cold, brutal, and detached from both men and sex (or at least, sex with those particular men). It’s inherently a very unbalanced dynamic – he’s wealthy and has a lot more life experience than his college-aged (or potentially younger) sugar baby. It isn’t uncommon for these men to try twist that to their advantage.

Honestly, sugaring isn’t worth the hassle unless a) you want professional connections and are smart and charismatic enough to make them through dating your SD or b) you cannot handle escorting.”

It’s Not For Everyone

From imhereforthemeta:

“I did it once… by that I mean one attempt/date. I was going on a lot of dates so I could experience the far away city I moved to and I decided YOLO and responded to a sort of skeezy ad I found locally. TBH I had just left my boyfriend of about 7 years after some really f*cked up stuff happened and I was pretty numb.

I had the guy pick me up under a false name at an apartment that wasn’t mine. He was about 55 years old and we got together on the precedent of a ‘sugar baby’ relationship sort of ‘trial run/first date’… He took me to a really fancy Italian place. I admit, I was super fascinated with what made the guy work… like why are you trying to pick up chicks… over half your age?

Turns out there was nothing interesting about him, and promises to pay my bills and buy me things were very unappealing when he started opening his mouth. He was married and a total pig about his wife, who he basically described as a god damn saint but who was too old/ugly for him now so he f*cks younger girls instead. He kept commenting about how I was the same age/etc as his daughters (whom he was very proud of, ick) I was very uncomfortable at this point but had no car, so I just kept agreeing with him and buttering him up. I then decided to proceed to order the most expensive things I could off of the menu and chowed down.

He dropped me off at that apartment a few miles from my house and we parted ways. He tried to kiss me. It was gross.

I don’t think I would have taken him up on the full baby offer regardless of his personality because the idea of that kind of dependency makes me anxious, but yeah.”

Beware Of Salt Daddies

From Dahliayy:

“I’ve met 3 salt daddies. These two kept on talking about sex before I even met. They asked for nudes and even tried sexting with me. Every time we tried to meet they would cancel last minute, give some stupid excuse and then try to lure me to their house or whatever hotel they booked. One met up with me and then left me with the lunch bill…

One time me and a POT [potential sugar daddy] agreed to meet up for lunch just to know each other. After we both ordered he suddenly started asking if I’m interested on going to a hotel with him after lunch (which ofc I said no). We tried to talk over lunch but GOD HE WAS SUCH AN ASS. I hated all of his views but idk why he was so smitten with me. Dude kept on touching me and I just tried to avoid and eat my lunch as fast as possible.

I clearly didn’t like this guy so after we were done with lunch, I just said that we’re not getting along well and I wasn’t interested with having an arrangement with him. He didn’t take it very well so he just straight up walked out of the restaurant and left me with the bill. I didn’t have enough money but I was so lucky to have my friends around to pay the bill for me.”

 

Check out the conclusion tomorrow!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12pm EST.

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Real Life Sugar Babies Describe What It’s Like To Have A Sugar Daddy – Part 1

You’ve heard the term “sugar daddy,” but do you know what it really means? “Sugaring” is a paid arrangement between two consenting adults – typically a younger woman and an older man – that includes an agreed upon number of hours or days spent in one another’s company. Many of these relationships begin by using a niche dating site geared specifically to hooking up sugar daddies with sugar babies. While such arrangements almost always include sexual contact, some sugar daddies also seek out the “girlfriend experience,” which can include just hanging out together, having someone to talk to, or serving as a dining and travel companion. Sugar babies set the rules and payment, and often are the recipients of free accommodation, shopping sprees, spa treatments, and much more. The money can be quite good, with lots of free time and perks included.

True sugar daddy stories are not always what one might expect, though. When sugar babies talk about their sugar daddies, it’s clear that their experiences are a mixed bag. Ideally, it’s a win-win situation for both baby and daddy, but there are many less than desirable scenarios and date horror stories from real life sugar babies.

So, what’s it like to have a sugar daddy? It’s best to let the babies speak for themselves.

It’s Just Like Any Other (Challenging) Job

From BunBunPurrPaws:

“I was one on and off for years. Like any job, it’s a mixed bag. Like any job, it gets old after a while. The big difference between it and a ‘straight’ job is that you control everything, which also means that all the risks are on you to mitigate to the best of your ability. You pick who to meet and make an arrangement with, you set your hours, you get cash to do with as you please. That might all sound great, but it can be horrible if you don’t have excellent street smarts and intuition. You HAVE to be hyper aware to do it safely. You will be alone with men who you don’t know well, who feel like you owe them something (because you do if you want to get paid. This job is 100% paid companionship INCLUDING SEX in almost all cases).

There’s also some myth that sex work is unskilled. It’s definitely not. Being a sugar baby takes a lot of natural and learned social abilities. You have to be able to play girlfriend to a wide variety of men, not to mention have some sexual abilities worth paying for. It’s actually a pretty challenging job. 90% of it is being able to talk about anything, while making him feel like the center and king of your universe for those hours every week. That’s not easy with someone who you would never probably date for free. It requires a lot of patience and intuitive people skills to do that every single week for a long time.

That being said, it came very naturally to me and I never ended up in a bad situation. I enjoyed it while I enjoyed it, then I quit. Knowing when to get out and having a plan to do so is another important factor in being a sex worker.”

The Online Girlfriend Experience

From omcthrowingaway:

“I did online arrangements similar to Sugaring in college. I exclusively offered ‘Online Girlfriend Experiences’ where a person would pay me to act like his girlfriend online, including sexing, but without my face in any photos.

While I don’t want to do it again, it was probably one of my favorite jobs. The money was fantastic and I had complete control over whoever I worked with. If they were being rude, I could end the arrangement.

Despite a hard rule of not showing my face and other safety measures, a lot of guys would open up to me, tell me about their life, and send nonsexual pictures of themselves. My average client was generally only slightly overweight, in their later 20s to early 30s, average looking, and a little socially awkward. There’s a misconception that only men who are very unattractive or old pay for these things. I had my fair share of men who were divorced, married, and/or conventionally good looking. Generally, they were either too busy or too shy to maintain a real relationship. Most men were just lonely.

Most of my clients were very kind and interested in getting to know me and my personality. As someone else stated, sex work isn’t unskilled…

Of course, you occasionally have the bad eggs. One of the creepiest men I worked with was a very good looking married man with young children. He also liked to send me nonsexual pictures of his wife behind her back at the grocery store, driving, etc. Basically, he got off on talking to me while spending time with his wife. Eventually, this creeped me out enough to end it.”

Be Careful Who You Meet

From love_lavender:

“I met men up with a few men on Sugardaddie.com. First off, stay away from this site. There are nothing but creepy, lying weirdos on there…

The second guy I had met was from San Francisco and didn’t post his pictures on his profile. We chatted a lot on the phone and texted each other frequently. He wasn’t very good looking. Shorter than me (I’m 5 foot 9 inches) and looked like Nick from that 1980’s sitcom ‘Cheers!’. He was also missing a front tooth. He told me he had just gotten divorced so he wasn’t looking for a relationship yet. He gave me a pseudonym. When I figured it out and asked about it, he gave me this long-winded, weird reason why he used it. I got an uneasy feeling, but dismissed it.

He really seemed like an ok guy. He showed interest in me, allowed me to use his address to look for a job in SF, he showed concern about my well-being too. He even offered to send me some money when I told him I was broke.

He wanted to meet up in Nashville – I canceled. He wanted to meet up in San Diego – he canceled last minute saying his mom had breast cancer. We kept in touch and he kept offering me to fly me to SF to be with him. Finally, I flew to SF on my own. We had dinner and alcohol. He came across as sort of passive-aggressive. He kept telling our waiter to tell another table to stop being so loud. He had to fly to NYC while I was there, but he kept wanting me to come over, take me to the Four Seasons, he was constantly angling for sex, but I just didn’t feel comfortable.

After I got home, he offered to rent me an apartment close to him in SF. He even CC’d me on the email to the landlord. HE bought me airline ticket to come to SF and start my new life. I ended up chickening out.

We chatted a bit after that, but he never responded to an email and text I sent to him. I took the hint. That was it.

Fast forward to a year or so later… I get back on Sugardaddie and there is his profile. He had shaved 5 years off his age and this time he had pictures. Here’s where it gets more interesting. I Googled him and found a short bio of him on his new company’s website. It said that he was married to his opera singer wife (the one he said he had divorced) and they had homes in Sonoma, CA and SF. I looked at his Instagram pictures and there they are having dinner, site seeing in Paris, kissing and hugging.

I just looked him up on that website. HE IS STILL ON THERE. His recently activity was yesterday. His wife has no clue. Who knows what would have happened if I moved to be with him. He’s definitely a liar and who knows what else.

If you want an experience, then this will give you one. Just remember, it is a REALLY BIG RISK and something bad can happen. I recommend making your own money and staying safe.”

 

More tomorrow!

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12pm EST.

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Sun Stories: Pamela – 2016 – Free Tanning Card

“Do you think I’m a prostitute?”

I was in a bar one night having a few drinks and seeing my friend, Prova. (See: Prova – 2015 to Present – Glow of the Sun) I was giving out free tanning cards to the girls working behind the bar, and I gave one to Pamela.

About a month or so later she came into the salon with the card I had given her. She seemed a little crazy. Just fussing over her face in the mirror and chattering about her job.

I take her back to the best bed in the house and show her how the bed works. She seems really into tanning. She’s excited to have a session in the best bed in the house.

When she’s finished she comes out and says she loved it and is going to buy a package. (The Free Tan Cards really work!)

She starts telling me how she’s going to see this guy she met on Tinder in New York. I tell her to be careful, and to let a friend know when she’s going, where she’s going and how long she’s supposed to be there.

Then she shocks me that she’s going there because the guy is paying her.

“Oh.”

“Yea. I’m kind of a sugarbaby.”

She went on to tell me about how she has a guy in Florida that pays her $2000 to come down for the weekend. He flies her in and pays her $2000 cash twice a month. She showed me a picture of him on her phone and he’s a fat half Asian, half Hispanic guy. He’s probably an IT computer guy with lots of money and no game. But hey, if he’s willing to pay…

“Do you think I’m a prostitute?”

Technically, what she’s doing is prostitution, but we’re at the salon and she’s a paying client with a premium package.

“No. You’re an adult and you can do what you like, Pam.”

“Ok. I just don’t want you to think I’m a whore.”

“You’re fine. Pam. No worries.”

“I just got this new phone. Do you have a charger?”

“I do.”

“Can you charge my phone while I go tan?”

“Sure.” She hands me the phone and I plug it in. I notice that there is no code to lock the phone. “Pam, you should put a code on this phone to protect people from looking at your stuff.”

“I don’t care if you peek.” She gives me a sly smile and heads back to the room.

Should I go through her phone and look at her pics?

Of course not! That’s an invasion of privacy. I’m employed here to protect my clients and take care of them.

Did I go look at her pics once she was back in the room?

Of course I did. She did say that she didn’t mind if I peeked.

So I looked.

There were many nude photos of Pam, of a graphic sexual nature. It was exciting to see her nude, but it was also a little gross.

When she came out of her session, she came to the counter to retrieve her phone.

“I put it in Airplane Mode. It charges twice as fast.”

“Thanks.” She gave me an approving smile. She knows I looked at her pics.

On another occasion, she was in room #10 at our old location, and I was next door in room #11 doing a demonstration for a woman who wanted to get a spray tan. Pamela must have heard my voice and opens the door of her room, and asks for an additional towel.

She was topless.

I hate my job.

 

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Church – 2013 to Present -Seizure Salad

I’m sitting in my go to bar with Church. It’s our spot and it’s what we do. He’s sipping a Sailor Jerry and Coke, and I’m having my usual Chardonnay with a side of ice. He orders a salad and I go with the sliders. There is a couple a few seats down from me to my right. I know the guy, his name is Brian, but I don’t know the lady he’s with so I wave but don’t approach. He could be working.

On the left of Church, is a brunette in her thirties and an older gentleman. Looks like a lawyer. We don’t really pay any attention. We’re chatting and doing our thing.

Daphne rolls behind the bar and says hello. She tells me it’s a slow night. Not much happening. She goes back to her hostess stand and it’s just another night in paradise.

Suddenly, the woman who was sitting to Church’s left, goes off the bar stool and hits the floor. Normally, I’d call that Thursday night.  We see so many banged up people around the city losing their shit. But this woman was having a seizure. People within visual range are shocked and the bar goes quiet.

I point to the phone on the wall, because the bartender on duty didn’t see one of her patrons suddenly vanish from the bar. “Liz, call 911.”

She starts dialing. Church, with his cat-like reflexes, springs into action and goes from sitting next to me sipping a drink to all the way around the other side of her on the floor holding her head to keep her steady. I get down there and untangle her leg from the lower rail of his bar stool. I have the legs. Church is focuses on the poor woman’s head. She’s thrashing about, and Church is barking commands to those around him. He’s literally single-handedly coordinating the effort to help save this poor woman, and keeping her from injuring herself further.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but Church was formerly a Corpsmen in the United States Navy.

A Corpsman works in a wide variety of capacities and locations, including shore establishments such as naval hospitals and clinics, aboard ships, and as the primary medical caregivers for sailors while underway. Hospital corpsmen are frequently the only medical caregiver available in many fleet or Marine units on extended deployment. In addition, hospital corpsmen perform duties as assistants in the prevention and treatment of disease and injury and assist health care professionals in providing medical care to sailors and their families.

They may function as clinical or specialty technicians, medical administrative personnel and health care providers at medical treatment facilities. They also serve as battlefield corpsmen with the Marine Corps, rendering emergency medical treatment to include initial treatment in a combat environment. Qualified hospital corpsmen may be assigned the responsibility of independent duty aboard ships and submarines; Fleet Marine Service, SEAL and Seabee units, and at isolated duty stations where no medical officer is available.

Yea, pretty bad ass. That’s the guy you want next to you when somebody takes a header at your favorite bar.

She’s making what almost sounds like barking sounds, and staring wildly about. He’s got a good hold on her. He’s talking to her. But mostly he’s trying to keep her from bashing her face into the wooden wall of the bar. The bartender comes around, and some others have gathered. I grab a cloth napkin and ask if we need to put it in her mouth. I always heard that epileptics could bite or swallow their own tongues. Church says, no. He knows what he’s doing and has the situation well under control.

She seems to be calming down. I look over at the guy who was with her. He’s just standing there staring, and looking uncomfortable. The paramedics come and stabilize her. I feel so bad for her. It’s the holidays, and she’s out for a drinks and this horror befalls her. They get her onto the gurney and roll her out. The police are there and also ask some questions. Church is on point, he gives law enforcement the full report.

They also speak to the guy she came in with. He says he doesn’t know her very well. He met her over at DelFrisco’s steakhouse, and then brought her over here for a drink. That’s a big lawyer hang out. Not my scene. This guy didn’t do anything to help or comfort her when she had the seizure, and he didn’t go to the hospital with her. I don’t care if you just picked up the chick in a bar. Lady falls down, you go to the damn hospital with her. I’m thinking that weasel was married and didn’t want any problems. How would he explain to his wife that he was at the hospital with some other woman? I may be wrong, but I got the vibe something was definitely shady about that guy.

We go back to our seats at the bar and have another drink. Church is pissed because somebody was telling him to turn her head when she was foaming at the mouth and that’s not what you’re supposed to do. Me, I was just glad the lady was okay.

Daphne came over to chat and get a recap. I tell her what I know, and tease her.”You had to say it was a slow night and that nothing was happening, and look what you did, Daph…”

“I know, right? Me and my big mouth.”

Indeed…

 

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Hookers on Tinder

“I’ve always said, free sex always costs more than sex you pay for. The dinners, drinks, birthdays, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and other things like little gifts and flowers. That stuff really adds up. Some older men have that kind of disposable income. Maybe they don’t want a wife or a girlfriend. They would rather just pay a flat monthly fee and get what they want, when they want from a younger woman.”

What’s with all of the hookers on Tinder and Clover? There are loads of them. I have swiped right on several women. They are normally between the ages of 18 and 26. I call them hookers because technically that’s what they are. Or is it something worse?

A hooker solicits men for sex. They give a certain dollar amount and she performs a sexual act. You can give it a different name like escort, but that’s the same thing as calling a strip joint a gentleman’s club. Same thing, just more expensive and better looking.

Frankly, I’m surprised at the number of young women on tinder that solicit you for sex. At first you’re all happy that you are engaging a cute younger woman. Your stupid man brain thinks, “Maybe she likes older men, or dug my profile, etc.” But that idiotic notion quickly fades when she wants a relationship that is “mutually beneficial.” That’s when you know that she wants you to give her money and gifts. I’ve spoken to at least a dozen girls on the site, and usually they want around $2000 a month minimum for their services. Sometimes it’s not sex, it’s just dinner, gifts and companionship. A nightmare for me!

Think about that. You could get a part-time job and no one would be the wiser. You could make a nice living that way. Well, there is nothing nice about it I suppose. But what if she gets a few sugar daddies? She could pull down $5000 cash a month or more! That is very lucrative. You probably only have to bang the guy once a week maybe. I don’t know how much action these guys need.

I’ve always said, free sex always costs more than sex you pay for. The dinners, drinks, birthdays, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and other things like little gifts and flowers. That stuff really adds up. Some older men have that kind of disposable income. Maybe they don’t want a wife or a girlfriend. They would rather just pay a flat monthly fee and get what they want, when they want from a younger woman.

I’ve tried dating my age lately and it’s not really working for me. I’m not going to give up on it but younger women are more fun. Have I ever paid for sex? Haven’t we all in some form? Men and women. It’s the oldest vocation in the world. Probably older than farming.

I’ve never went out with any of these hookers on Tinder. Frankly I can’t afford them. Why would I want to be with a girl who doesn’t love me?  I’d be just a debtor. Just a guy that has to make his monthly payments or his little plaything goes away. I don’t think this is something new, but they’re basically escorts. Will this affect their psyches later in life, when she’s a mom with kids and a husband? Will she look back on her early twenties when she worked as a whore? There has to be some karmic backlash to this activity. Plus you can’t be a hooker for your whole life. Once your beauty fades your price has to be reduced. It’s just a downward spiral into a dark abyss.

Maybe it’s the fastest easiest way to pay for college for some girls. With the world on social media and this generation obsessed with taking selfies and sending each other pictures of their junk, maybe it’s just easier for this group to have random sex and profit from it.

But somehow that all seems a bit sad to me. I love women. They are an absolute delight to me, and there has to be something else some of these girls could do so that they don’t have to sell their bodies for money.

 

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