Sun Stories – Chanel – American Gypsy – Part 1

It was late on a Wednesday night. I had worked at the salon the day before from open to close. That’s 10am to 8pm on your feet. To some that may seem like a long day, but I revel in it. I get up early, go out to breakfast then head to Wawa for all the food I need for the day. (Which is normally too much) I get a sandwich, some fruit, chips, a can of soda and a desert. That worked just fine yesterday.

The reason I had to work all day at the salon alone, was because the gym we’re trying to open in the front of our shop is in conflict with the folks upstairs.  They have a cardio gym up there and they are suing us and the landlord for $50,000 to cease and desist. It’s a joke and we know it, but Achilles needs to go to court until we resolve it.

It’ll be fine… they don’t have a leg to stand on. They’re just afraid we’ll take business from them but our fitness center is all strength training and has nothing to do with what they do.

So here I am on a Wednesday doing my thing when the phone rings. It’s around 7:00pm.

“Thank you for calling Sunlight Tanning, This is Charles, how can I help you?”

I hear a youthful, girlish voice on the line.

“Hi. I want to go tanning and I forget where you are.”

This is a common dilemma for people. We used to be up on 16th Street near Steve’s Prince of Steaks but we’ve moved down to the shopping district on Walnut Street.

“We’re at 1234 Walnut Street second floor over Shaffer’s clothing store.”

“I used to go to you to tan… near a pizza place. Where are you?”

At this moment I realize this girl formerly went to a place that was near our old location, called “Sun Myst” which is a piece of shit tanning salon that does nails, threading, cryo and who knows what else to stay afloat. Their tanning beds are junk, the staff is surly, and they are more expensive that we are. I see a potential sale here so I go in teeth out and dorsal fin up.

Oh, you mean Sun Myst near Joe’s Pizza.

Oh, yes… thank you… (Ready to hang up. Sales God instincts kick in to steal from a competitor)

We have the best equipment to get you tan and have better prices than they do. What do you pay there?”

“How much for one UV?”

“$17 for one but $40 for five and they’re good for three months.”

“Oh. I only want one to try it.”

“Okay, we have state of the equipment to get you dark.”

“Oooh I want that! Sounds good!

I’m on the wireless house phone walking into the front of our business which is the gym. The machines stand silent. We can’t open our gym because of the lawsuit. I think of that as I walk toward the  windows that over look Walnut street.  A lovely view of the shopping district. It’s alive with people. We are mired in legal troubles but it’s the only quiet space in the salon because we have no members yet.

“Do you have lotions I can use to make me darker before I tan to make my color come out?”

“We have an array of product like that. (I smile)

“Okay. Where are you again?”

“1234 Walnut Street. 2nd Floor.”

“Okay, I’ll try you guys.”

“$17 for one. $40 for five good for three months.”

” I only want to do one to try it.”

“Tell you what. You do a single and a packet of my best lotion I’ll knock 10% off so the whole experience will be $22.

“Oh my, yes! see you soon!”

“Okay, well if you get lost on the way here call us again.”

“Okay I’m Chanel. Thank you.”

“I’m Charles… nice to meet you Chanel. I hope you come to our salon.”

 

“Hey , I’m underage. I’m only 17. Can I still come?”

 

Okay, my loyal readers this is where the rubber meets the road. Because without parental consent we are breaking the law tanning a person under the age of 18.

 

“Nah it’s cool. I’ll let you tan, dear. But we just need to discuss that when you get here. Okay?

“Mmm… thank you Charles.”

 

I’m on the phone with this girl who has already been tanning at a competitor and hates the experience and has been paying too much. As a sales guy I need to destroy my competitors and covet their clients. She’s only coming in for one, so I’ll figure it out when and if she even shows up.

It’s 7:50pm which is the witching hour for tanning salons. We don’t want anybody coming in at closing because we’ll never get out of here on time.

I’m mopping the floors and folding towels out of the dryer when there is a knock at the door.

There through the glass is a very pretty Eastern European girl  in a t-shirt, sweat pants and sneakers.

“Hey, hello. I’m sorry I’m late. Are you closing? I’m Chanel.”

Chanel, the 17-year-old minor I spoke to on the phone. She was beautiful. Raven black hair. The T-shirt said I love Zombies.

 

This one looked like she was fun and trouble all rolled into one delicious pastry.

 

Tune in tomorrow for the jarring conclusion…

 

 

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Murder Mystery Weekend – Chapter 4

I offered to show Craig a good place to get costumes. But I had to practically threaten Eric to get him to show up. The three of us went to the Lido, the costume supplier for several downtown theaters.

Some guys would roll their eyes at the thought of going into such a place. But Craig and Eric were pleasantly surprised. First of all, the place was immense, with an incredible selection. Second, the mannequins on display looked fantastic. There was a roman centurion, a renaissance courtier … And third, most of the costumes were real. Not cheap plastic, not imitation, but real, quality cloth.

Craig was impressed by a Captain Morgan outfit, but wouldn’t rent it.

– “That looks too fancy. I think I’m just a common sailor.” He settled on an oversized, brightly colored, striped shirt. It looked like a rugby jersey, to me, except that it had laces at the throat. He liked the look of a polka-dotted headscarf, too.

We found him some black boots made out of soft leather, and a wide sash to wear around his waist. Black pants that he could tuck into his boots completed the outfit.

– “I like the sash. Good for tucking a knife in, or hiding your driver’s licence.” I told him.

– “Should I get an eye patch?” he wondered.

Just then Eric came around the corner, with a bundle of clothing over his arm. He was wearing two eye patches – one over each eye.

– “Where are you guys? Ahoy, mateys!” he called.

Craig and I exchanged a look.

– “Maybe not.” he said.

Eric fell in love with a dark grey thing that looked like a vest. It was long enough to reach below his knees. It might have been appropriate if we were doing a samurai murder mystery.

But he had found a pair of boots from the Three Musketeers era, and a huge tricorne hat. I left Craig to help him find a shirt and pants, and wandered off to find my own costume.

Some people would hesitate to spend $200 – or even $100 – on a costume. I’m not one of them. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve spent that much on a fancy restaurant meal, or a sports event, or concert tickets. Some of those outings were memorable, others not so much. But a really cool costume can create a memory that will last a lifetime.

I found what I wanted: a black coat with silver trim and enormous cuffs, a soft tricorne hat, soft black boots, and a wide black belt with an ornate silver buckle. Add a large white shirt with a high collar and black knee-breeches, and I was good to go.

Perhaps a bit too splendid for Ned Mulligan, you might say. Too bad. Let the others think that I was some sort of gentleman pirate. A little deception can go a long way. Besides, when I tried it on, it felt remarkably good. And a glance in the mirror confirmed that it looked great, too.

Eric had somehow found a scruffy grey beard.

– “Doesn’t this look awesome?” he asked me.

– “It looks itchy.” said Craig.

– “How can you put a price on art?” retorted Eric. It made no sense, of course, but he never let that hold him back.

– “You look like Captain Child Molester.” I told him.

– “Precisely!” he roared. “I’ll take it!”

I took them out for beer and wings afterwards. Craig turned out to be a decent guy, as I had anticipated. He found Eric funny, and we had a few laughs.

 

https://lapetitemort17.wordpress.com/?p=256

 

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How to Show Love: 15 Sweet Gestures to Express Love without Words

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Kimiko – Chapter 1 – Pearl of the East

So one day I’m just swiping on the online dating site, Bumble. That’s where if you and someone else are a match, the woman has to go first. She has to start the conversation in 24 hours or the match expires. Women are pretty smart. If they’ve swiped right on you, they’ll probably talk to you. They’ve already read your profile and have decided they’d like to take the next step and get to know you.

I’m just cruising through the site looking for maybe some funny profiles I can include in my ongoing “Tinder Moments” series.

I’m swiping away and suddenly I match up with someone. She’s already chosen me with a right swipe. So I take a look at her profile.

Kimiko is a super hot Asian girl with a lovely face, an amazing body and spectacular hair. She is MODEL pretty. What a stunning find. 5’4″, Japanese, lean slender body, and deadly legs. I wish I could show her real pics here, she’s that pretty.

I cannot look away.

I can’t resist.

What’s still wrong with me?

Why am I doing this? I have a girlfriend I adore that I’ve already cheated on, and within weeks of the end here I go again. (See: Ambria)

But I have to say something here. I just don’t care. Don’t get me wrong. I love Cherie, but I want to do this. Has something died in me? I just don’t have the dopamine love drug in me anymore. Maybe I can just do this because I know I’ll be dying in the next 20 years or sooner. Why not enjoy as many people as I can because you never know when it could all end. Just have all of the love and fun and sex I can before I exit this world. Is it that simple? Just give up and not care anymore. That can’t be right. But I’ve never been more calm and happy. Odd.

If Kimiko looks anything like her photos I’ll be dating an “actress hot” woman if I can find time to see her with all that’s going on in my life right now.

What a beauty.

What if she doesn’t reach out and start the conversation? I’ll never know anything about her because all it says on her profile is the town she lives in and what she does for a living, which is Retail.

I’ll just sit and wait.

 

But Kimiko does reach out.

K: Hi

Me: Hello Kimiko.

K: “Good Morning.”

Me: “Nice to meet you. What do you like to do when you’re not working?”

That’s one of my classic questions if someone’s profile is virtually blank. 

K: I like hiking, walking or just chilling at home. I’m a big fan of music, all different kinds, love live concerts. I’ve been to many concerts.”

Me: “That’s cool. Would you like to meet up for lunch sometime?”

K: “Sure”

Me: “Do you ever come into Philly?”

K: “I used to live in Philly. I go there a lot. I once lived at 13th and Locust, and then moved to City Ave.”

Me: Ok. Shall we exchange numbers?”

Phicklephilly going in for the early close.

K: Ok my cell is: 856 XXX-XXXX

 

So we’ll see what happens because I’m super busy right now and this one could fall between the cracks. But she’s super hot and I can’t let her get away. I am driven to close her even if it’s just for drinks or a little dinner. She’s so beautiful I can’t let her get away. I have a girlfriend but I am doing this again. This isn’t how I am or is it?

What if at my age I am so burned out and jaded from the Michelle’s and Annabelle’s I’m just going to get my kicks until I’m dust?

What an insane summer. No one knows about this. I’m navigating this on my own. I love my girlfriend Cherie, I had an affair with Ambria and now I am courting Kimiko for a date.

What am I doing? What am I searching for?

 

 

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Curving is the Latest Dating Trend you Need to Know About – and it Might just be Worse than Ghosting

http://va.topbuzz.com/s/eShSQcp

 

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Tales of Rock – Pattie Boyd

I loved writing this post!

Precious few of us will know what it’s like to hear a hit song on the radio and be able to say, “That’s about me!” If we do, we can only hope it’s not on a Beyonce track called “Uber Driver Smelled Like Piss.”

Even fewer of us will ever know what it’s like to have a former lover pen a top-40 song about our time together. Yet, there are still hundreds, if not thousands, such people walking the earth right now. These are the anonymous men who wish they had a platform to rebut Taylor Swift or Adele, or the unknown woman who tried to tell The Weeknd that he was probably having a stroke. It has to be flattering regardless of how you’re portrayed — whether your track falls into the “Your Body Is A Wonderland” or “You Oughta Know” category, at least you know you made an impression.

But within that select group is an even more elite subset of people who’ve gotten around enough that they became the subject of multiple hit songs, from different artists. This is the story of one such woman who inspired at least three of the most iconic love songs ever and is the subject of at least five songs overall (that we know of!). These tunes combined to sell tens of millions of copies and spawned dozens of covers — she is literally one of the most sung-about humans in the history of the species, and her name is Pattie Boyd.

Let’s start with “Wonderful Tonight” by Eric Clapton, one of the most romantic songs ever.

It appears in shows and movies like Miami Vice, Friends, Captain Phillips, The Story of Us, and countless crappy Idol type shows. Every time it’s in a soundtrack, it’s to signal the deep infatuation between two characters. A more historically accurate use, however, would be signaling the love between a character and someone else’s wife.

See, Clapton wrote the song in the late ’70s for Boyd, his then-girlfriend. Reportedly, he was waiting for her to get dressed one night and instead of complaining that she should have started getting ready 30 minutes ago, he just wrote a classic song.

This was not a new occurrence for her, though, and her romantic history with famous songwriters was a long and tumultuous one. Years earlier, in 1968, George Harrison of the Beatles had written the song “Something” for his then-wife … also Pattie Boyd:

That’s “Something” as in “Something in the way she moves … ” aka, another of the most romantic songs in history. Harrison later changed his story and denied the song was for Boyd, but you would, too, after what happened next.

See, Harrison and Clapton were good friends at the time, which is why it was awkward when Clapton fell madly in love with Harrison’s wife. He even wrote a song for her. No, not “Wonderful Tonight,” this was still years earlier — we’re talking about “Layla,” the epic seven-minute rocker that, thanks to Goodfellas, you can’t hear without picturing dead mobsters in a ditch somewhere.

So, that’s another one of the greatest love songs ever. Upon hearing it, Boyd … didn’t care much for it, apparently, because she didn’t respond to Clapton’s advances, sending him into a four-year heroin binge. Admit it: How many of you out there are now sad that you never got the chance to know this woman?

It was only after that, when her marriage to Harrison had completely fallen apart, that she finally hooked up with Clapton. But wait, there’s more! According to Ronnie Wood of the Rolling Stones, he and Harrison slept with each other’s wives in the ’70s and Wood wrote the songs “Mystifies Me” …

And “Breathe on me” about Boyd as well.

 

Look, let’s just assume every love song is about Pattie Boyd unless you hear otherwise.

 

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Death in Paradise: Who is Josephine Jobert? Meet the Sergeant Florence Cassel Actress

 

Love her!

Death in Paradise: Who is Josephine Jobert? Meet the Sergeant Florence Cassel actress

Meet the actress who plays Sergeant Florence in the BBC hit series Death in Paradise.

Last updated: 17 January 2019 – 6.02pm

French actress Josephine Jobert, 31, is back as Sergeant Florence Cassel in the new series of Death In Paradise.

Ahead of this evening’s latest mystery – the death of a hotel billionaire’s fiancee falls from a balcony the day before her lavish wedding – we learn a little more about the TV star.

[Read more: Who is Ardal O’Hanlon – 5 facts about the Death in Paradise’s Jack Mooney]

Death in Paradise Josephine Jobert

Why do you think Death in Paradise has become such a big hit?

It’s a family show. It’s not violent. There’s no blood. There are so many series that I like to watch, but sometimes I’m like, ‘It’s too violent’. People beating each other, saying bad words, you have blood – it’s very, very dark. And with Death In Paradise, you have the British sense of humour.

Death in Paradise

This was your first English langauge role, wasn’t it?

Yeah, this was my first time acting in English. Three years ago, I was terrified, but very excited. The lead actress, it was Sara Martins, she left the show and I was taking her place, so I was afraid because everybody’s looking at you like, ‘OK, so let’s see what you can do’.

Everybody’s judging you in a way, but the crew is fantastic. Learning my lines in French, it’s OK, I can learn pages and pages the day before, but in English you have to think about the accent. I just want people to understand what I’m saying, the rhythm, the stress on the words, you know? But now it’s my third year and I’m more comfortable and more confident.

You must find it tough to leave the island of Guadeloupe when filming ends?

Yes. It [the shoot], it’s a very long time, almost six months. It feels like we’re a little family. We don’t have the chance to go back home at night and see our family so, yeah, you get used to it. You make friends over there, so when you go back to Paris, it’s very different. I like Paris, but it’s a very stressful city. I prefer London.

Death in Paradise

You must know the island very well by now?

Yeah. It’s a small island. There’s plenty of things to do and to see, but during the weekend I just stay at home because I have a very nice villa with an amazing view. I’m not a party girl. I don’t drink. So during the weekends, I just stay home, learn my lines. My villa is my favourite place – and the gym. I go to the gym four times a week just to stay in good shape because I’m wearing lots of short shorts.

Actress Eva Green is your cousin…

Death in Paradise

That’s true. Her mother is my father’s sister and my father is white, my mother is black so that’s why we don’t look the same. I don’t know her very well. When we were children, we spent a lot of time together, but then I moved to Montreal when I was 12 for eight years with my mother and stepfather and when I came back to Paris, she was in London, already working a lot. I’m very proud of her.

Would you like to follow suit and play a Bond girl?

You know it’s funny you say that because it’s one of my goals. Everyone around me tells me, ‘You’d be a good James Bond girl’. Why not? I’ll tell my English agent!

There has been a lot in the press about lack of diversity in the industry. Have you encountered this?

Yeah, in France especially, it’s really difficult for black women and even more for mixed race women because they’re too white or too black. It’s not easy. That’s what I’m very proud of with Death In Paradise, that we have so many black actors. In France, it’s very, very difficult and nobody talks about it. It’s taboo. And lots of actors suffer because of that.

Death in Paradise is back for an eighth series! What can we expect this time round?

Death in Paradise series 8

It’s the best series since the very beginning, to me anyway! It’s very different from all the others. We have love, drama, action, new characters, amazing guest actors, as always, and it’s something I’m very proud of. Episodes five and six are especially more intense so I can’t wait for people to watch!

Where do we find Florence at the beginning of the series? Has anything changed since we last saw her?

At the beginning of the series we find out that she’s dating a lovely guy, Patrice, it’s a brand new relationship; the other characters don’t know anything about it. She’s a bit afraid to tell them because she’s not really sure yet that it’s going to be a serious relationship. Florence is taking her time and she’s waiting for the right moment. We’re going to learn a bit more about Florence this year, both within her private life and work life. She will still be that strong independent woman that she has always been despite being in a relationship, and that’s what I love about her storyline.

How long have they been together?

We don’t really know how long but it’s still new, maybe two or three months.

What does Patrice think about her job?

Patrice is really respectful and he knows that it is very important for her. Florence is very clear about the fact that it’s her career, she doesn’t want him to interfere so he needs to trust her; she knows what she’s doing. Florence wants to keep the professional, professional and the personal, personal. That’s why she’s still the same person as she’s always been.

What is the relationship like between Florence and Jack? They seem to really get on and work well together.

Florence and Jack get on so well! They are so cute together. We have a fun scene where we have a few drinks together, which I really enjoyed. I don’t drink and haven’t since I was younger so trying to remember what it feels like and act drunk was fun. Of course, we can’t drink on set so we used a mix of apple juice and water!

Can you tell us anything about the cases that feature this series?

There is one episode where there is murder in the zoo which was fun to film. There’s also one on a bus which is pretty cool and another where Patrice finds himself involved. There is an episode, where the island hosts a swimming competition and that was hilarious to shoot, running and jumping in the sea is always fun because it’s so hot in Guadeloupe!

Did you have a favourite episode to film?

It was definitely episodes five and six. I had so much fun! I remember waking up in the morning knowing I had a very intense scene to film and I was so excited. Tobi, Shyko, Ardal and I had so much fun filming this series, and the crew were great, we were filming something very different in those episodes and the set was amazing.

The scripts for each episode of Death in Paradise are full of twists and turns. Do you ever guess correctly who the murderer is without peeking at the end? Who is the best at working out who did it?

I don’t even try to, I just read the script, I want to be like the audience and follow the story as each episode develops. There was an episode last year featuring a miracle healer, I remember reading it and at the end I was like ‘no way!’ I was so shocked to find out who the killer was. It’s always full of twists so it’s very difficult to guess. I do live tweets when the show is on TV in the UK and there are not that many people who guess who the killer is. That’s one of the things that is so ingenious about the show.

Death in Paradise series 8

You’re no stranger to the Caribbean sunshine. What’s it like filming in such a beautiful place in the world?

It can be difficult. When I was 20 it was okay for me to just leave home for a month and be alone and do my own thing. Now I like to be near my family, my friends, my boyfriend. It’s a beautiful place but you do miss your family. It’s a beautiful island, with beautiful beaches. I have a lovely pool, an amazing view so I just swim in the pool, lay in the sun. I can’t complain!

What were the biggest challenges you all faced during the shoot?

Florence is a very secret character so I’ve never had to portray intense emotions such as anger or fear, or being deeply in love so for me the biggest challenge was to portray those emotions. It was great to dig deep inside and bring all those emotions out. It was a challenge but I loved it

Do you have any favourite moments from set that you can share with us?

It’s funny every day. It’s difficult to choose because anytime I’m with the cast on set we just have so much fun together, we laugh so hard it I sometimes have tears in my eyes!

What are you most looking forward to the audience seeing this series?

Two things; the first is the new officer Ruby Patterson, she is so much fun and the audience will love her. Shyko, who plays Ruby, is fantastic! She’s so adorable. I call her ‘mon petit bon bon’, which means my little candy because she’s so cute. The second is episodes five and six which is a double part episode.

Who is Florence Cassell?

Twenty seven year-old Florence Cassell has risen to the rank of Detective Sergeant pretty fast for someone still so young. But that’s because Florence is incredibly good at what she does. She’s dedicated, focused and has a great nose for sniffing out those with a guilty conscience. In short, she makes an excellent detective.

Having grown up in a house full of men (she has five older domineering brothers) she learnt from a young age that to stand out she had to learn to be assertive, to be strong-minded and, above all, to not be a pushover. And growing up in this environment explains why Florence is so good at spotting when someone is lying or hiding something. It’s because she’s seen it all before with her rascal brothers.

But aside from being such a good police officer, Florence is friendly, charming with a winningly mischievous sense of humour – qualities which have endeared her to Humphrey, for whom she has become a close friend as well as a valued colleague and someone he turns to for guidance as he navigates his love life and starts dating Martha.

Who is Joséphine Jobert

Originally born in Paris, Joséphine moved to Montreal at the age of 12 where she learned acting, dancing and singing, eventually returning to France to pursue an acting career. She comes from a family of artists. Her mother is Véronique Rouveyrollis, a photographer, musician, writer, performer and director and her father, Charles Jobert, is a director of photography. She is also cousin to Elsa Lunghini and Eva Green.

She gained notoriety playing Amel in the popular youth show Saint-Ex, nos Années Pension in 2008, and enjoyed 15 weeks in the French pop charts with a song from the show, which Joséphine sang.

Since then, she has continued her success playing long term character Alice Watson in Lightning which won the award for Best Youth Fiction Series at the TV Festival of La Rochelle and is one of France’s most widely exported series. She then landed the part of Roxanne in the popular French soap opera, Sous le Soleil de Saint-Tropez (2013-2014). She also appeared in The Judge Is A Woman, Cut!, Paroles and will feature in the next series of Villa Kariybes.

She joined the cast of Death In Paradise for the fourth series, in January 2015.

Death In Paradise series 8 airs Thursdays at 9pm on BBC One.

Missed an episode? Catch up on BT TV via the BBC iplayer app.

http://tv.bt.com/tv/tv-news/death-in-paradise-who-is-josephine-jobert-meet-the-sergeant-florence-cassel-actress-11364138050472

 

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Racquel Writes! 5 Reasons Why Online Dating Works

via 5 Reasons Why Online Dating Works

 

http://www.racquelwrites.com

 

 

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10 Steps To Successfully DTR

DTR = Define The Relationship

Whether you have been dating for a few weeks or a few months there is always a thought that lingers in your mind, “what are we?” If you have not defined yourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend, or monogamous, or whatever then you will always have that question in the back of your mind. After a while, there comes a time when you need to take a second with yourself and decide what is going on and where you want this relationship to go. Once you have done that it is time to have “the talk” and define the relationship with your partner so neither of you wastes your time. Here are ten steps you can follow to successfully define the relationship, hopefully, so there is no confusion throughout the process and it eases the minds of both parties involved.

Self Reflection

This is the obvious first step to making any moves in your relationship. Light a candle, grab some paper and a pencil. Rather than just pulling out your phone, actually, write down your reflection because then the connection is much stronger. There are studies that show the written word is far more meaningful than if you were to type up your thoughts on Notepad on your computer. Take a few deep breaths and enjoy the calm moment you are in and then begin to ask yourself questions about the relationship you are in. What are we? What do I want out of this partnership? Is there an end goal? Do I love this person? Asking questions like this to yourself will help decide whether or not you are ready to commit to a relationship and define yourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend or if you are not looking to get serious and you just want to keep it simple. Either way, you need to realize where you stand on your own before you have the talk so that you do not get bullied into something that makes you uncomfortable.

Take The Pressure Off

Sometimes a perfectly could be ruined by pressure. Do not jump into necessarily pressuring your partner into a relationship by being pushy about things. Being pushy can scare them off and end a relationship before it even has the chance to begin. When you are sure you want a relationship to ease into the conversation and wait for a good time so that no one is caught off guard or spooked out of anything.

Let It Be

If you are looking to define the relationship but not sure how to start sometimes just sitting back and letting it be can do the trick. Allow the relationship to evolve on its own without intervention and you may not even need to have an official talk, things will just fall into place. This is not always the case but you may luck out every once in awhile.

Plan It Out

It is always good to have a plan, with anything you do, especially things that involve your relationship. Decide when, where, how, and what to say. This way you can be in the proper setting with a plan of attack rather than just spur of the moment at a coffee shop without any warning. Also, be sure to tell your partner that the talk about defining the relationship is going to happen so that they are not thrown off either.

Have The Conversation On A Good Day

Make sure neither of you has major plans afterward, you may need to decompress after a long conversation such as this.

Private Location

Maybe have the conversation at one of your houses or a shared favorite spot such as a nice quiet park bench. A place that is special to both of you but also private and relaxed atmosphere.

Get In The Zone

Don’t run in blind to the conversation. This is a big deal and you need to focus up so that you can be the best version of yourself and have a straightforward mind to conquer everything that is about to go down. Do you have daily rituals such as yoga or boxing? Or do you zen out after a good run or cup of tea? Whatever gets you centered, do it. You need to be in the zone and relaxed before chatting about your future with your partner. You do not want any brain fuzz to get in the way of making such a huge decision.

Introduce The Conversation Casually

“I’m having fun with you and I want more…” Starting your talk with a nice opener such as this is great. You are starting on a casual and positive note. Maybe even give them a few compliments to make them feel like they are in a safe space so they too are ready to open up and be honest. Having the conversation start out casual will relieve some of the pressure of having “the talk.”

Be Flexible

Consider compromises when you are talking about the status of your relationship. You may not get everything you want and your partner may not get everything he or she wants but if you want your relationship to work then there needs to be room for flexibility and compromise. All relationships take work, no matter how you end up defining them. Let it be friends, friends with benefits, polyamorous, or monogamous.

Communicate Clearly

To listen to your partner is the greatest kindness you can give them. Listen and hear out their side of things and why they want to define or not define the relationship. Be open, flexible, and considerate. Also, when it is your turn to speak make sure that you spell out all of your wants and needs so that there is no room for error or confusion. You do not want to leave the define the relationship conversation more confused than when you entered.

Now that you have all of the information you can set aside some time for yourself to collect your thoughts and feelings about your relationship and then define the relationship with your partner. If all goes well you will leave the conversation as part of something more and if not then it was not meant to be and no more time will be wasted on a lost cause. If anything is sure to remain positive throughout the conversation and listen very carefully.

If you are still looking for that special someone to even have a relationship with let alone, defining it, take a look at Hily. Hily is an online dating app for singles to meet one another and spark up something special. Download it today and start talking. Happy Dating!

 

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A Unique Gift – Chapter 2

I loved writing this series!

He was on his way to bed when he stopped in the kitchen to grab a drink and saw the package sitting on the side. He had totally forgotten about it and he picked it up. It was a small, plain cardboard box with no markings other than his address which was written in a handwriting he didn’t recognize. He grabbed a knife and cut the tape on the box. Inside was another box, this one wooden. He opened the box to find a black shiny collar and a letter. Jack double checked the address, it was definitely sent to him but he couldn’t understand why someone had sent him a collar. He hoped the letter would explain.

 

To Jack,

Hey kiddo, long time no see. I spoke to your mother recently who said you were having a hard time at college and with your job. She said last time she spoke to you you had sounded pretty miserable. She also said she didn’t think you had many friends to rely on. I was the same at your age, although college was a lot different in my day. There’s so much pressure on you kids to be popular these days. Back in my day we went to college to learn, not to have popularity contests.

Anyway I’m getting off topic. I did try calling you but your mother said your mobile phone was broken. Why does nobody have a land line these days? I wanted to tell you about what I’ve sent you so I wrote you this letter instead. Inside the box you’ll find a collar, I know strange but stick with me here, it’s about to sound stranger. That collar is magical. Press your thumb against the back of the pendant and it will bind to you. Then anyone who wears it will become completely obedient to you for twelve hours.

I know, it sounds crazy, I thought the same when I first got it too but trust me it works. There are only two rules. First the wearer must put the collar on willingly by themselves. No sneaking it onto people, that won’t work but they don’t have to know what it does. Second it will always last exactly twelve hours, no more, no less and once it is done, it will return to this box. Again, I know how crazy this sounds but it’s true.

Give it a try if you don’t believe me, see for yourself. Also don’t worry, whoever wears the collar will remember what happened when the twelve hours is up but they will be completely fine with it. I hope you have as much fun with this as I did and it makes college a little bit easier to cope with. Oh and the collar has some other features but I’ll leave those for you to discover.

Lots of love,

Grandad.

Jack just stared at the letter. There was no way this was real. Now he knew who it was he recognized it was indeed his grandad’s writing, or at least he was fairly certain it was if he remembered from the Christmas card he got every year. This had to be come kind of prank he was playing. Sending him this collar and claiming it was magical. There was no way.

Jack removed the collar from the box and studied it. It was black, shiny leather and had a small round pendant hanging on the front with a clasp at the back. It seemed completely normal, there were not markings, no inscriptions, nothing to even hint at this collar being magical. Not to mention that it looked brand new. Just to prove a point, Jack followed his grandfathers instructions and pressed the flat of his thumb against the back of the pendant. As expected nothing happened until, much to Jacks surprise, the pendant glowed blue and Jack watched in amazement as the light seemed to wrap around his thumb before disappearing instantly.

He double, triple checked the collar for some kind of battery or light but found nothing. He started to doubt his own convictions that this was a trick. He couldn’t find anything to explain what had just happened and began to consider maybe his grandfather was telling the truth. Next he started wondering who to test it on. He was too tired to think now, it could wait until tomorrow.

He went up to bed, putting the collar on his dresser before falling into bed. Despite finding out magic may in fact be real he was so tired he fell asleep almost instantly.

 

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Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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