There are a few common red flags that tend to appear in relationships, and most of us know how to identify the majority of them. But then there are those warning signs that don’t appear all that bad at first.
There are also those that might actually seem like positives in the beginning, and so we ignore them. Unfortunately, ignoring red flags only leads to problems.
Red flags foreshadow behavior that becomes even worse as time goes on, so the sooner we pick up on the fact that someone isn’t good for us, the better.
It’s time to learn what warning signs to look out for in a partner! Check out these 15 red flags that girls usually ignore, and 5 that we never should overlook.
20 Red Flag: Always Talking About His Ex
Digital Trends
It should definitely be a red flag if a guy can’t stop talking about his ex. You might brush it off as him simply letting off some steam, but if he keeps ranting about the ex, then the ex is still very much on his mind.
A lot of the time, these kinds of guys are on the rebound.
19 Red Flag: Making Her Feel Jealous When She’s Not Normally
Magicpin
Sometimes jealousy comes down to our own insecurities that we project onto other people, and other times jealousy happens because other people purposely do things to mess with our minds.
If a guy clearly does things to make you feel jealous, and like you might lose him at any time, that’s a red flag.
18 Red Flag: She Has To ‘Edit’ Things About Their Relationship When Talking To Her Friends
Film Doo
Pay attention to how you recount your relationship to your friends. If you’re always censoring and editing things out, ask yourself why.
Are there things going on in your relationship that the people who care about you wouldn’t approve of? If there are, it normally means that you shouldn’t approve of them either.
17 Red Flag: Comparing Her To Other People In His Life (In A Negative Way)
Booklover’s Haven
It doesn’t feel good to always be compared with other people. It’s not a good sign if the guy you’re seeing always measures you up against his exes, or his friends’ girlfriends, or worse, his mom.
You’re your own person, and you don’t have to live up to somebody else. You’re enough on your own!
16 Red Flag: Blaming Her For Everything That Goes Wrong
Vox
There are two sides to every story, and sooner or later, we all mess up in relationships. If he blames you for every little thing that goes wrong, that’s pretty telling behavior.
It shows that he can’t take responsibility for his own actions and likes to shift the blame onto other people.
15 Red Flag: Being Unable To Argue Respectfully
ScoopWhoop
Being able to argue with respect is key in a relationship. Eventually, a couple will always fight, which is why being able to argue in a way that’s not harmful to your overall relationship is so important.
It’s a red flag if he totally loses the plot every time you disagree about something and takes days to recover from a small difference of opinion.
14 Red Flag: Saying Hurtful Things And Calling Them Jokes
ScoopWhoop
The truth is often hidden beneath the guise of a joke. If your partner likes to say things that hurt your feelings and avoid responsibility by saying they’re just jokes, it says a lot about him and his level of respect for you.
If you’ve told him how they make you feel and he persists, consider it a major red flag.
13 Red Flag: Allowing Friends To Treat Her Badly
Seventeen Magazine
It’s sad when relationships come between friends, but it’s even sadder when your partner’s friends aren’t nice to you and he does nothing about it. If you’re in a relationship with him, then he should stick up for you at all times.
If his friends aren’t quality people, you might ask what sort of person he is to relate to them in the first place.
12 Red Flag: Never Paying For Anything
StudioBinder
We don’t agree that the responsibility should always pay on the guy to pay for everything. This isn’t the 1950s anymore!
But at the same time, if he’s sitting back and expecting you to pay for everything, it’s not a promising sign. This is the behavior or a user or freeloader.
11 Red Flag: Constantly Being Late
Shadow and Act
Being late might not seem like a big deal, but when it happens over and over again, it can reveal a lot about a guy’s personality. If he’s always making you wait, then the chances are he doesn’t respect your time and doesn’t value your feelings.
We’re all late sometimes, but when it’s a routine thing, it becomes a red flag.
10 Red Flag: Being Entitled To Things From Her
It’s a huge red flag when a guy acts entitled to things from you. This is especially true if he’s only ever nice when he wants something in return.
If he reminds you that he paid for dinner, so you should be going home with him tonight even if you don’t really feel like it, it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship.
9 Red Flag: Dismissing Her Feelings
The New York Times
Your feelings are valid and you deserve to be in a relationship where your partner acknowledges this, just like you would acknowledge that their feelings are valid.
It’s a red flag when you tell him how you’re feeling and he simply tells you to “get over it” or something equally as infuriating.
8 Red Flag: Being In A Relationship For All His Adult Life
The Vore
This isn’t necessarily a red flag, but it can be. If a guy bounces from relationship to relationship, he’s with a new partner every few months and he’s never single, it likely shows that he doesn’t know how to be alone. Or, he’s afraid to be alone.
Being reliant on relationships like this comes with an array of problems and should be a red flag.
7 Red Flag: Always Having Something Negative To Say About Her Friends/Family
Vogue
None of our families or friends are perfect, but part of being in a relationship is putting up with the people in your partner’s life (unless you have a great reason not to).
If he’s always dissing your family and friends, it could be the start of him turning you against them and isolating you.
6 Red Flag: Refusing To Discuss The Future
Vogue
If you’ve been together for a reasonable amount of time and he still refuses to discuss the future, it’s not a good sign. This could mean that he doesn’t envision a future with you or he’s afraid of a commitment.
When he’s just a fling, it isn’t a big deal. But if you’re in what you think is a long-term relationship, then it is.
5 Don’t Ignore: She Leaves Him Feeling Bad
Movie News
The whole point of a relationship is that it enhances your life experience. It shouldn’t complete you or be the one thing that makes you happy, but it should make you happier.
If your partner puts you in a bad mood every time you see him, something’s not right. And chances are it will get worse.
4 Don’t Ignore: Being Prone To Uncontrollable Emotional Outbursts
Washington Post
We can all lose control of our emotions every now and then. But if you notice that he’s constantly having major emotional outbursts (think a child having a tantrum), it’s not a good sign.
Being unable to control emotions like anger could mean that he’s more likely to become physical with you in the future.
3 Don’t Ignore: Making Threats
Vulture
Threats are never okay in a relationship. Your connection should be about love and trust, not ultimatums and living in a state of fear.
Even if he only makes threats about the little things, it should still be a red flag. The little things tend to get bigger over time.
2 Don’t Ignore: Treating Other People Poorly
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they treat people that they don’t have to be nice to.
He might be nice to you because he’s dating you, but if he’s rude to the wait staff or even strangers on the street, he’s probably not the nicest person.
1 Don’t Ignore: Being Controlling In The Name Of Love
Vic & Walter Thiessen – On Movies…
Love is not about control. It’s a huge red flag if he tries to control you in the name of love, even he starts by trying to gain control of the little things.
As an adult, you have the right to make your own decisions, and anybody trying to control you doesn’t genuinely have your best interests at heart.
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