How Can Someone Fall In Love Quickly After A Breakup? Experts Explain

There’s no right or wrong way to get over a breakup. There’s no set time frame for moving on either. But if you’re someone who can’t stomach the thought of being with anyone else for a while, it can be pretty shocking to find out that your ex has happily moved on and fallen in love with someone else so soon.

Some people really can move on quickly right after a breakup. In fact, a 2007 study published in The Journal of Positive Psychology found that most people can get over heartbreak in about three months. According to Kim Egel, licensed therapist who specializes in relationships, how long and intense the relationship was are often key factors that contribute to how long it takes someone to heal. If your families are close, or if you have the same friends, it can be even more difficult to fully walk away.

“Healing time is very individual and unique to the specific relationship dynamic,” Egel says. “For example, if the relationship was unhealthy and abusive, it could be longer to sort through the kind of emotions that come with such a connection.”

It may seem obvious, but there is a difference between seeing someone new and actually being in love with them. It’s not shocking to find someone getting out there and dating other people in order to help with the moving on process. That’s what rebound relationships are all about. But it can be pretty surprising to hear someone say they’ve already fallen in love again so soon. According to experts, it’s very possible for some people.

Here are the reasons why some people can fall in love again so soon right after a breakup.

1. They Emotionally Checked Out Of The Relationship Earlier Than You Thought

Some people emotionally check out of a relationship long before they end it.

KaptureHouse/Shutterstock

It’s easier to fall in love with someone new if you weren’t that in love with your ex in the first place. “There are many relationships where one partner is more serious about it than the other,” Kate MacLean, relationship expert at Plenty of Fish, tells Bustle. “The less serious partner likely had ‘one foot out the door’ and was ready to move on.”

More often than not, people don’t just end a relationship out of nowhere. It can sometimes take weeks or months until they realize that they’ve finally had enough. People usually start checking out of the relationship once the thought of breaking up enters their mind. According to MacLean, it’s usually only a matter of time before thoughts get put into action.

2. They Have No Walls Up When It Comes To Love

When someone falls in love again so soon after a breakup, it’s easy to believe they’re just doing it as a way to fill a void. But as Shannon Battle, licensed professional counselor who specializes in relationships, tells Bustle, that’s not always true. “Love isn’t well thought out, it’s strictly guided from emotional regulation,” Battle says. “People who are more emotionally responsive to situations may use actual feelings of love to compensate for their hurt.”

Shortly after a breakup, it’s normal to want to close yourself off to love for a while. But according to Battle, some people don’t. “They have no boundaries with this emotion and they freely give it to others because they highly value intimacy and connection in relationships,” she says. When you’re truly open to giving and receiving love, it’s easy to fall in love again. Some people would rather open themselves up to a good feeling like love than feel pain.

3. They Found “The One”

Some people will fall in love shortly after a breakup if they meet "The One."

Shutterstock

“Love is very mysterious,” Egel says. “Sometimes the right person will come along at a very interesting time, and that can be right after a breakup.” When it comes to love, there are no rules. Just because someone fell in love right away, it doesn’t mean that they cheated, didn’t love their ex, or that their last relationship wasn’t meaningful to them. It just means that they happened to find their perfect match soon after a breakup.

Even if this is the case, it’s still important for that person to take time to process their feelings towards the breakup in order to get a sense of closure. That way they can move forward and start their new relationship off right.

There’s no set time for when people should be fully healed from a breakup or when they should be allowed to fall in love again. Everyone processes heartbreak in their own way, and everyone falls in love on their own time. These are just the reasons behind why some people can fall in love in love so quickly after a breakup.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Listen to Phicklephilly LIVE on Spotify!

Facebook: phicklephilly       Instagram: @phicklephilly       Twitter: @phicklephilly

Sasha – Chapter 5 – The Super Queen

I;ve been writing alot about Sasha lately. She is my number 1 at the tanning salon. There is always a pecking orderhen it comes to guys. Sadly it’s like a dog show, but not really.

We rate girls all of the time, and it’s just sad, but itps what we do.

Sasha came in one night to tane and I wasn’t there and when I met her, I wa blown away.. She is so beautiful it makes my dopamine drop and my eyes water.

Raven hair, lean body, lovely face, effervecent perssonality. Just a an absoliute queen. The kind of girl that phicklephily worships.

Sasha liked the attention. he is very sweet and was always admired by her female co workers which is good.

But here i the queen that gets 3 dozen roses sent in on Valentine’s day. hare i the girl that wants a diamong ths size of a door know whn she get engaged. This is an amazingly beautiful woman that is incredibly demanding and high maintenence.

But I get the opportunity to crawl into her world and worship her.

I know.

I am who I am. As I;ve gotten older i really apreacieate the company of young beautiful women. I want want I’ve alays had. If there is a way I can sustain that I will.

Just to sit next to a pretty girl and share a laugh anda drink means so much to me now.

The best part of a date.

The very best part of a relationship.

i can’t be in a relationship with a woman anymore. I just want to relive greatest hits. That’s enough for me now. It’s too hard to maintain a relationship with a woman anymore.

I think i’m done.

 

(exccept for my current projects)

 

When I got the text from Sasha that she wanted to meet up with me , I was floored.  One of my tanning clients wats to meet with me outside of the salon for a drink, I’m blown away.

It’s Sasha. My Number 1

I know she wants to meet with the owner of te company to sell tham some payroll services but that’ not happening. I wonder if that is what that meeting is all about.

But sasha has a lot off work to do and wants to come buy and eat and work.

Of course i welcome my queen.

” I have a lot of work to do, but I can still come and work and eat and do you work there if you want. are yu arounnd?

Yea

ok im charging my computer a bit and i’ll swing by

Just getting my work done here then will swing by

they just cut me

Noooooooo

I thought you were ther till 5

I was like theres no way im going to get my work done there i have so much to catsch up om with charles

so i wanted to do it before

i was scheduled till 5 but i got cut

I have a cpa meeting at 5 but need to eat a little something before, are you going home?

no

what are ur plan

tinking

wrape shack

is that right nexts door? I just really want some sweet poptato fries

they have thises right

Thats whay i chise that place. of cource

 

ok coming now

 

take youre time. i kist got there

 

I’ve been there at Wrap Shack for 30 minuyes, I’ve already befeiended the bartender and seeral of the patrins.

“If aand incredibly beautiful raven haried woam enetersy  this bar and is looking for me, tell her I’m here and sut her here. I have to go to the bathroom.

I return from the throm and nothng has happened.

But then Sasha Arrives.

I’ve never seen her in her in re busines clothes. Only in her wrkour gear at the dalom/

The makeupu, the clothes, the perfume, makes her more beasutilf That Ive ever seen her. Ive never looked upon her like this ever. The woman sitting next to me that wants sweet potato fries id one of the nmost lobe;y women I’ve ever seen in my kife.

I could feel the light coming off of her as i casually chatted twith her aouth ebreythug. I loved bathing in the goddes light that sashe gave off and never knew she had

her boyfriendand future husbands will never know the rush of love I have for this seet buety , A primal feeking that was born oin the 70’s for the prettietest girl in schoool you could never have but later clides when you youwere in a band and couldn;yt understand why,

but here is ans elehgant relic that represents what yove loved your whole life, and can no longet have. you smile and know she belongs yp  moyjthe, bit had it been 30 yeas afo, she;d be your best girlfriend nd youve alrwdy dne that.

But I Love my time with Sasha

She has no idea that she represenset s all of my girls from LA  all of my loves and losses. but ut feels good in ths mment. The sun  my face. I now I can stuill feell a Sasha and she lights me up. A fleeting fire that was alive in my past but a sweet remeinder fo me kno that I can enjoy in o moment.

i know that Sasha belongs to another but that is the classic artists phlight, at my age  I’m fine with it. I enjoy her presence an inspration

It’s gotten to the point where I jut love the comapmy of young pretty girls

Thats it.

Just hang out anf have a godod time.

I go hime after  coulel of ourd to watch netflic

After sweet potato frieds , quee has to go.

I have o be honest here. To siit net to Sasha and look upon her and share sweet potato pries and a drink with hre has been amazing.

Yu mmeet the prettiest girl in the wirld at at a tanning salon and thats that.  You get to sit beside her and have foof and drinks, that is i amazing. Sash dhas no idea of her balue to me.

It means the worls to me to sit besuide here. i sinet evebr know what. I just love her. i look upon her in her business attire and she looks so perfect. I’ve bere seen her rthis way. Usually sportys/ Tioodat, all dressed up. I nbusuiness attire, she loks magnifigant. More beaurtifu than ever, My Sasha’ Qyuessm

my queen

You with your crooked nose an my sad reminder of therese. My original loe.

 

Sasha my absoliute lovely queen that is high mainetenses that i neber hVE T LIVE WITH,

mIKE HAS TO BE THE MAN IN YOU LIGR’ I WILL LOVE YOU FROM AFR N HE WILL LET ME. tH SHARK THAT SWINS BY YOU, BUY CAAN BNEVRER HAVE YOU

I loves my brief time with you at the Wrao shacj and sharing sweet potto fir and a cider

The bartendrs are still taiking about yur beauty

why an I drawn to you Sasha

Whay am I always drawn to ll of the Sashas, The allisons/ The kates…

 

Wat happens now… Do I extract you from mike, due to my fatal charm like I took the last three?

No.

I don’t do that anymore. Myshark swims in different ceans

 

You’re all safe from me now.

i have what I want now.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Instagram: @phicklephilly      Facebook: phicklephilly   Twitter: @phicklephilly

How Can Someone Fall In Love Quickly After A Breakup? Experts Explain

There’s no right or wrong way to get over a breakup. There’s no set time frame for moving on either. But if you’re someone who can’t stomach the thought of being with anyone else for a while, it can be pretty shocking to find out that your ex has happily moved on and fallen in love with someone else so soon.

Some people really can move on quickly right after a breakup. In fact, a 2007 study published in The Journal of Positive Psychology found that most people can get over heartbreak in about three months. According to Kim Egel, licensed therapist who specializes in relationships, how long and intense the relationship was are often key factors that contribute to how long it takes someone to heal. If your families are close, or if you have the same friends, it can be even more difficult to fully walk away.

“Healing time is very individual and unique to the specific relationship dynamic,” Egel says. “For example, if the relationship was unhealthy and abusive, it could be longer to sort through the kind of emotions that come with such a connection.”

It may seem obvious, but there is a difference between seeing someone new and actually being in love with them. It’s not shocking to find someone getting out there and dating other people in order to help with the moving on process. That’s what rebound relationships are all about. But it can be pretty surprising to hear someone say they’ve already fallen in love again so soon. According to experts, it’s very possible for some people.

Here are the reasons why some people can fall in love again so soon right after a breakup.

1. They Emotionally Checked Out Of The Relationship Earlier Than You Thought

Some people emotionally check out of a relationship long before they end it.

KaptureHouse/Shutterstock

It’s easier to fall in love with someone new if you weren’t that in love with your ex in the first place. “There are many relationships where one partner is more serious about it than the other,” Kate MacLean, relationship expert at Plenty of Fish, tells Bustle. “The less serious partner likely had ‘one foot out the door’ and was ready to move on.”

More often than not, people don’t just end a relationship out of nowhere. It can sometimes take weeks or months until they realize that they’ve finally had enough. People usually start checking out of the relationship once the thought of breaking up enters their mind. According to MacLean, it’s usually only a matter of time before thoughts get put into action.

2. They Have No Walls Up When It Comes To Love

When someone falls in love again so soon after a breakup, it’s easy to believe they’re just doing it as a way to fill a void. But as Shannon Battle, licensed professional counselor who specializes in relationships, tells Bustle, that’s not always true. “Love isn’t well thought out, it’s strictly guided from emotional regulation,” Battle says. “People who are more emotionally responsive to situations may use actual feelings of love to compensate for their hurt.”

Shortly after a breakup, it’s normal to want to close yourself off to love for a while. But according to Battle, some people don’t. “They have no boundaries with this emotion and they freely give it to others because they highly value intimacy and connection in relationships,” she says. When you’re truly open to giving and receiving love, it’s easy to fall in love again. Some people would rather open themselves up to a good feeling like love than feel pain.

3. They Found “The One”

Some people will fall in love shortly after a breakup if they meet "The One."

Shutterstock

“Love is very mysterious,” Egel says. “Sometimes the right person will come along at a very interesting time, and that can be right after a breakup.” When it comes to love, there are no rules. Just because someone fell in love right away, it doesn’t mean that they cheated, didn’t love their ex, or that their last relationship wasn’t meaningful to them. It just means that they happened to find their perfect match soon after a breakup.

Even if this is the case, it’s still important for that person to take time to process their feelings towards the breakup in order to get a sense of closure. That way they can move forward and start their new relationship off right.

There’s no set time for when people should be fully healed from a breakup or when they should be allowed to fall in love again. Everyone processes heartbreak in their own way, and everyone falls in love on their own time. These are just the reasons behind why some people can fall in love in love so quickly after a breakup.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

%d bloggers like this: