Why Understanding How A Man Thinks Can Make Or Break Your Relationship

Are men’s minds really that different?

Understanding how men think is the key to knowing if he is ready to take the next step with you, or if it’s time to move along. It’s important to evaluate his behavior to see if the two of you are on the same page.

When you understand how a man thinks, you’ll never have to ask him, “Where is this going?”

Make him earn it.

Don’t date backward by giving the benefit of the doubt to a stranger on a date. Just because you have chemistry doesn’t mean you two have the same values. A man has to earn the benefit of the doubt with you first.

Understanding how a man thinks about dating and mating assists with your being discerning through the dating process, ultimately so you can select an ideal match.

In the blush of the romance stage of a relationship, it’s easy to give the hot guy a pass, and quite frankly the hot guy is used to not having to work hard at getting attention, companionship, and even sex.

Understanding how men think can ease tension.

Even long-term marriages suffer because after spending years together, it’s all too easy to fill in the blanks and make assumptions that you’re on the same page even when you’re not. Understanding how a man thinks differently about everything from mundane tasks to achieving life goals can ease unwanted tensions.

Men and women differ in the way they think about dating, relationships, and sex. In order for your relationship to thrive, understanding how a man thinks about you, your relationship, and your future together will give you the clarity and confidence you are looking for.

If you’re wondering why he isn’t calling to set up the next date, or why he is texting to see if you want to “hang out,” then you’re missing the fact that he likes you but he’s not falling for you.

The signs of a relationship-ready man.

A relationship-ready man will drive the relationship forward. He will pursue you for a relationship and will want to claim you. He will push for exclusivity.

He will not be ambiguous in his behavior because when he thinks you are “the one,” he won’t want to give another guy the opportunity to take you away from him.

Women nest, they plan, they prepare, they make sure there’s a backup of almond milk in the cupboard. A man only hunts when he’s hungry.

Don’t make things too convenient.

It’s important that you don’t make things easy for the guy you want a relationship with. This doesn’t mean playing hard to get or being inauthentic.

If you make things convenient for him — calling to ask him out, making all the plans, texting often to see how he’s doing — then you leave the door open for the convenient guy to hang around way too long.

The “convenient guy” is happy to have your company, to share emotional intimacy, and to get regular sex. However, he’s not interested in any kind of long-term commitment. He’s just going with the flow and will happily go along with whatever is easiest.

The battle of the sexes.

Leave space for a man to pursue you, and you’ll never have to wonder what his intentions are. So many men these days feel like they can never win with their spouse. It can feel like there is an ongoing battle between the sexes that men fear they’re losing.

The most common complaint from men going through a divorce is that they didn’t know how they could “win” with their ex. They felt like all that they heard was criticism, and so they ultimately gave up on the relationship.

Let a man know how to win with you.

He’ll be eternally grateful. It also helps if you acknowledge and appreciate his efforts. A man who cares for you wants to be your hero. He wants to be your knight in shining armor, and in return, he wants you to respect him.

This doesn’t mean that he won’t support your efforts to change the world. He’ll be happy to let you lead the way. Let him know how he can win with you by being by your side and by being your biggest ally.

Understand that men are less emotional.

Ask a man how he feels and he may give you a blank stare. Understanding how a man thinks is very different from being in touch with his emotional life. He likely prioritizes his thinking state and doesn’t spend much time labeling emotions.

So, ask a man what he thinks and he will gladly share with you. It’s not that men aren’t emotional. It’s just they generally aren’t as in touch with their emotions as you are. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t feel deeply.

Understanding how a man thinks and differentiates his thoughts from his feelings allows you to talk across the brain. You can share with him how you feel, and then ask him what he thinks.

A man will know how he feels about you.

He may not always be able to express it clearly with words, but his actions will tell you all you need to know.

Paying attention to a man’s actions will inform you about his values.

A man likes to try to solve your problems because he wants to feel useful. Men develop a lot of their self-esteem by their actions and their accomplishments.

Just because he is offering his opinion on how you should handle a situation in your life doesn’t mean he thinks you’re incapable. Quite the contrary! Understanding how a man thinks will inform you that offering you suggestions is his way of being helpful.

Solving your problems is one of the ways he feels useful to you.

A man who cares about you doesn’t want you to struggle. When he hears about your difficulties at work or with a friend, he’s looking for an opportunity to find a problem he can fix.

Understanding how a man thinks differently from your female friends will encourage you to ask him to simply listen. If you don’t want suggestions from him about how to handle the situation you’re sharing about, ask him for what you need instead.

Make a request before you share what’s going on that you would like him to listen and you need to speak with someone you trust. Let him know how he can be useful and you will feel supported by him and emotionally connected to him.

Women are great at multitasking and men are great at focusing their energy.

Because men have traditionally been the hunters and the earners, they will focus their energy on the task at hand.

So many women are doing too much in their relationships and don’t understand why their man isn’t stepping up to reciprocate. Understanding how a man thinks will clear this common problem up quite easily.

Men are not wired to reciprocate. If he sees that a task is being accomplished, his mind thinks it would be inefficient to help. He sees you as capable and will assume you’ve got it handled.

Stepping back will leave space for him to help out. When women do more, they inadvertently inspire him to do less.

Understanding how a man thinks will let you know that if you need him to do something, you’ll need to spell it out for him and say it. When he does what you ask, acknowledge and appreciate him. This will inspire him to step up and be your hero.

If you find yourself complaining that there are no “evolved” men or that you don’t know where to find them, understanding how a man thinks differently about how to better himself will let you know where to start.

Men do personal growth differently.

A lot of men like to challenge themselves by perfecting a task or pushing their physical bodies. They’re not comfortable sharing their emotions in a public setting.

Instead, they may participate in organized sports, have a workout buddy at the gym, clear their mind in the garage fixing the car, or building some furniture.

Understanding how a man thinks about personal growth and what that means about his desire to become a better man will inform you if he is an ideal match for you over time.

Reserve judgment and allow him to reveal his true nature to you over the course of several dates.


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5 Weird Things Men Want In A Woman, According To Science

Who knew!?

What do men want? It’s a mystery — and will most likely remain a mystery. But that hasn’t stopped science from trying to discover the answer to this human attraction riddle.

On the one hand, every man has his own personal preferences. Qualities and traits that are most visually and sexually appealing to one man may not be considered as attractive to another.

However, research has found that there is one thing that’s common for many men: they tend to trust their first impressions, and those initial moments have a great impact their level of attraction to individual women.

Of course, there are women who master the art of making a good first impression with little to no effort, while some have to work a little bit harder.

To help you understand what guys want, here are 5 things science says men find particularly attractive in women.

1. Wearing very specific kinds of makeup

Some men claim that they prefer women without makeup because they look natural. But according to a survey conducted by the online dating Zoosk, out of 1,200 women who wore eye makeup in their profile photo, 139 were more likely to receive messages from men. Men were also more likely to want to meet a woman if she’s wearing lipstick in her profile photo.

However, women who tend to wear “darker” types of makeup were less likely to get asked out. So, even if men say they prefer women who looked “natural,” that means you can wear “natural”-looking makeup and still attract men. Also, men, it’s OK to admit that your girl looks good with the winged eyeliner and red lipstick.

2. Possessing the right waist-to-hip ratio

This preference has less to do with attractiveness and more on health and fertility.

“Evidence also shows that waist-to-hip ratio is a strong indicator of a woman’s estrogen levels, risk of obesity, and susceptibility to major disease such as diabetes, ovarian cancer, and heart disease,” says the article.

3. Wearing the color red

Red is the color of passion. So, it’s no wonder that men are so attracted to it.

In a study by psychologists from the University of Rochester, men were shown photos of different women in framed borders of either red or white and were asked how pretty they found the women.

Then they were shown the same photo with the women wearing either red or blue and asked how much money they would spend on a date with that woman. The women framed in red or wearing red were more likely to be found sexy and attractive, and the men more likely wanted to spend money on a date.

4. Having a kind attitude

A nice attitude always goes a long way.

In a study from the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, researchers found that a woman’s responsiveness to men’s needs and wants increased their attractiveness to men.

5. Speaking in a higher-pitched voice

Studies have shown that women tend to find deeper-voiced men attractive.

And the opposite is typically true for men, as some believe “[higher] voices signal reproductive fitness, femininity, and smaller body size.”

What do you think, ladies? Do you meet any of these qualities?


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‘Perfect storm to find, trick and coerce’: Girls at increased risk of being groomed online during coronavirus lockdown

‘Girls are bored, lonely and confused, often living in homes with compromised parenting. All this means it is more likely they will look for validation anywhere,’ says service provider

Girls are at increased risk of being groomed online during the coronavirus emergency as they spend more time online and out of school, experts warned.

Frontline service providers say they are already seeing teenage girls struggling with their mental health due to the upheaval of the Covid-19 crisis and perpetrators could take advantage of this increased vulnerability.

Charities warn lockdown measures create “a perfect storm” for abusers to “find, trick and coerce” young girls into exposing themselves on livestreaming sites — with the footage later distributed on child sex abuse sites.

Susie Hargreaves, chief executive of the Internet Watch Foundation, which removes child abuse imagery from the internet, told The Independent “within seconds” adult perpetrators posing as fellow teenagers or pretend boyfriends will urge victims to take their clothes off, adding that perpetrators use the footage to blackmail girls in the starkest cases.

Ms Hargreaves, who said men approach children as young as 11 online, noted the trend was already a “national crisis” before the coronavirus outbreak but could be further exacerbated.

She said: “A lot of key workers in supermarkets, the NHS and other jobs have to go to work during the coronavirus crisis. They have no choice. If their children are at home, it is impossible for parents to supervise them. Also, parents working from home have to juggle working and parenting. Internet companies have seen people online more.

“Children are all over the house on different devices. It is very, very difficult for parents and carers to supervise them.

“On the one hand, it is essential children are online as that keeps them connected to friends and family, mentally stimulated and entertained, but at the same time, it makes them more vulnerable. Being locked at home is creating a perfect storm for perpetrators to find, trick and coerce these children.”

Ms Hargreaves, who noted that girls were the victims in 92 per cent of all child abuse sexual content they had removed, said her organisation was working with the police and public agencies during the coronavirus emergency to record trends and potential surges.

Jane Kenyon, founder and chief executive of Girls Out Loud, a charity that works with teenage girls, raised concerns about how the closure of schools — most of which shut on 20 March — would impact teenage girls.

Ms Kenyon told The Independent: “Girls are bored, lonely and confused, often living in homes with compromised parenting. All this means it is more likely they will look for validation anywhere and the internet is probably the only place they can find this in isolation, without friends and school activities.  Also when you are bored and lonely you are more vulnerable and probably take more risks.

“As social media becomes their permanent hangout and they become complacent, their version of normal shifts and they overshare, their vulnerabilities show up louder and this allows sex offenders to pick up more in their search criteria.

“We are seeing girls we work with who have mental health issues struggling, with one non-fatal overdose already. But there is also a concern about what we don’t see as the girls are not in school and we are not allowed to continue our one to one work with over 80 per cent of them due to very strict key worker rules put in place by government i.e unless you have a social worker you are not considered vulnerable enough to go into school and meet with any intervention specialists like us. This is heartbreaking for us and them.”

Ms Kenyon said spotting the signs early is “generally the only safeguard” in place but no contact whatsoever makes this impossible. She noted school is a “place of safety” for many of the girls they work with and called for the government to open schools to all the young people “who want and need to” meet key workers and get support.

Jackie Redding, assistant director of operations for young people’s sexual health charity, Brook, said: “Because of the prolonged period at home, abusers have the time to invest in gaining the trust of young people. Naturally, young people may be feeling isolated, lonely and anxious and depending on their home circumstances, they may be worried about their family or feeling unsafe and looking for friendship online.”

Earlier this month, the National Crime Agency warned social distancing measures brought in to curb the spread of coronavirus could cause a substantial surge in online sex offenses.

The agency said the UK is home to at least 300,000 paedophiles who constitute a risk to children on the internet or in real life. The figure, which predates Covid-19, was published to draw attention to a potential “spike in online child sex offending during the coronavirus crisis”.

“They face an increased threat from offenders who are also online in greater numbers,” a spokesperson said. “The NCA also knows from online chat that offenders are discussing opportunities to abuse children during the Covid-19 crisis.”

Sarah Green, director of End Violence Against Women, said: “Any sense of lawlessness and police and other statutory services being diverted elsewhere, can drive perpetrators of sexual violence and exploitation to be more confident to offend, both in families and in the broader community.

“There is a serious risk of increased child sexual abuse online, child sexual exploitation of young people who are not in school and unsupervised, and sexual violence against girls by their peers on and offline, during this crisis.”

Experts say the grooming process can take place far more rapidly online than in person and self-generated content has risen exponentially each year since 2014.

In January, it emerged that one third of child sex abuse images are originally posted online by children themselves amid warnings of a rising phenomenon of minors sharing graphic footage for “likes”.

The Internet Watch Foundation took action on more than 37,000 reports that contained self-generated images and videos from the internet that depicted criminal imagery of under 18s between January and November 2019. It previously warned 80 per cent of the sexual selfies it found in its hunt for images of child sexual abuse were of girls aged between 11 and 13.


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Woman Arrested & Charged After Telling 911 Her ‘P*ssy’ Was ‘On Fire’

This is so crazy I had to post it!

A woman from Ohio was arrested and charged after she called 911 to say the emergency she was experiencing, was that her “p*ssy was on fire.”

Katrina Morgan, 50, placed the called to 911 late Saturday evening to report that her “p*ssy was on fire” and that she needed someone from the fire department to “put it out with their hose,” according to the arrest report.

Morgan then dropped the call, and when a police dispatcher called her back, she repeated the claim and asked for responders to “come put her p*ssy out because it is on fire.”

It should come as no surprise that reports say that Morgan also “appeared highly intoxicated” when cops arrived at her friend’s home in Lake Erie, that she smelled of booze and was “having trouble walking, was slurring her speech,” police noted.

Morgan was handcuffed and booked into the Ottawa County jail on multiple counts, including disrupting public service, a felony, and making false alarms and resisting arrest, both misdemeanors.

And Ye SHALL BE henceforth known AS FIRE CROTCH ! - Gingers do ...


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These Tips For Making A Dating App Profile Will Change Your Life

Creating your profile on a dating app isn’t easy. But why should it be? After all, you’re attempting to accurately convey your physical appearance, stellar personality, likes, dislikes, desires, dealbreakers, and much more through just a few select photos and a limited number of characters. So, when it comes to tips for making a dating app profile, you’ll likely take as many tricks of the trade as you can get. The truth is, though, you don’t need a long list with a dozen dos and don’ts in order to create the perfect profile and start getting great matches.

I spoke to three different dating app experts about their top tips for making a dating app profile. Each one gave their best piece of advice on how to capture all of the aspects I mentioned above, and send the right message to potential connections. When it comes down to it, there are really only three simple steps you need to take to build a profile that will get you noticed. There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you’re not just any fish. By taking these three hints to heart, you’ll stand out from the rest of the crowd — in the best and most refreshing way.

1. Choose current photos that accurately represent your personality and lifestyle.

Dating coach and dating app expert Meredith Golden says her number one tip is to have an amazing first picture. “Smiling, looking at the camera, no hat or sunglasses, vertical as opposed to laying in bed, and please have clothing on in the picture,” she says.

It’s equally as important to use photos that actually look like you. The goal is to find someone who likes you for who you are, so there’s no need to be deceiving. “Use accurate, current, everyday pictures,” says matchmaker and dating expert Stefanie Sufan.

“The most important and best tip I have is to take a current photo which truly captures the authentic essence of you, your personality, and lifestyle,” says Claudia Duran, VIP Matchmaker at Elite Connections. “So if you’re a beach lover, take it at the beach. If you’re a coffee shop nomad, take it at a coffee shop.”

2. Include a bio, even if it’s short.

The second rule you should always follow is to include a bio, answer the questions, or fill out whatever personal profile information the app makes available to you. “Write something in the description,” Golden says. “This is what fosters conversation, which is necessary to yield a meet.”

Just like with your photos, when writing your bio, you want to stay true to who you are. Authenticity is the key to making quality matches and achieving the best possible results on dating apps.

“It’s so important to convey who you really are on an online profile to avoid disappointment and wasted time,” says Duran. “The goal should be to actually attract people who would really like you and vibe with your lifestyle in person, so there are minimal awkward surprises on the date. Then it’s just about chemistry.”

3. Stay positive on your profile.

Third, Safran stresses the importance of remaining optimistic, both in your attitude toward dating apps and with the way you present yourself online. “Stay positive on your profile,” she says. “Yes, we all don’t want people with drama or negative people with issues, but putting that in a dating profile isn’t going to screen that out. Participating in dating with an open heart and mind will.”

When creating a dating app profile, being genuine is always your best bet. Choose photos that accurately represent both your physical appearance and personal passions, always include a positive bio, and maintain an optimistic outlook when matching, chatting, and meeting. Follow these three expert-approved rules, and you’ll be set up for swiping success.



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Eileen – Chapter 17 – Farewell My Love

Eileen has been an absolute delight to have as an employee at the salon.

She’s 18 and gorgeous. I’m actually surprised I got her.

She called to see if we needed help and I was desperate. She came in dressed to the nines and looked 23. I texted Achilles immediately for where the hell the job applications were.

She called and I really needed help but when I saw her and had to have her.

She was immediately hired, and she took to the salon like it was her own.

I liked that she had a natural knack to service. She’s a hostess at an Olive Garden back at home inn St Louis in the summer. I have found the perfect employee.

Eileen has been amazing in every way at this salon. Achilles is free of the bullshit of staffing and I am bringing him his best.

Eileen is amazing and is the perfect employee that’s always on time. I manage her schedule and Achilles doesn’t have to deal with it. I do this all summer long.

How bad is my life? I kill it at the salon and work with the best girls in the world.

I feed and reward a good staff.

My girls kill it for me. I make the salon my own. They will heave free food and drinks whenever they desire.

Eileen is in a relationship with a boy back in St Louis. They wear promise rings. I take Eileen out on weekly dates to piss him off. It’s funny, because as much rage as Thomas feels, it’s unfounded. I am simply rewarding the fine work I’m getting from Eileen. She’s fantastic and one of the greatest hires I’ve ever had.

Thomas needs to cool his jets and know that I’m not some creepy old guy after his girl but a dad who adores his staff and takes good care of them.

Thomas has been angry lately. He thinks I’m a pervert. I like that. Be worried, child. I am simply rewarding a couple of great ladies for kicking ass during our busiest season.

Eileen and Amelia are the greatest employees we’ve ever had. I adore them both,

I’m honored they’re both in my life.

Ease up dude.

Eileen is a great girl you should honor because she’s amazing and forget about me.

I just loved being with her because she’s amazing.

“I’m not after her. I love the great work she did for me. Settle down, Thomas.”

Eileen is going back to St Louis and her work is done here.

She came in to see us and say goodbye, but it’s bittersweet, because we’re not just losing the Spring help. I’m losing Eileen. One of the best employees I’ve ever had.

But I have to understand. She has to go home. She’s worked so hard on her studies in Criminal Justice at Drexel and given her all here at the salon.

I dream of employees of Eileen and Amelia. We’ve been blessed this season.

I have loved working with both of these wonderful women, and enjoyed my time with them.

Eileen was mostly food and Amelia was more about cocktails, but I love that.

Help has been the major challenge at this company, but I have eradicated that problem with these two wonderful people.

I’ll miss my time with Eileen. She has been a delight to work with. Her personality, her dress code and service have always been first rate. She’s a lovely, smart girl that always looked great for work, and treated the clients with such great hospitality.

I trained she and Amelia and they were both on point.

It made life at the salon so much better during our busy season.

The clients don’t care, they just want to get their base on. But the girls have been amazing and innovative to keep everybody happy. That’s I how I trained them.

I miss Eileen already.

She boarded a jet back home for the summer. She works at Olive Garden as a hostess in her home town. She’s already asked me for a raise when she comes back.

Future lawyer.

I love her.

She texted Amelia and myself when she was going home and said she would miss us.

I know she’ll be missed far more by Amelia and I.

Can’t wait to see our friend again.


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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