12 Things To Know About Dating A Musician

If you go to bed with a writer, expect to wake up with shit written about you.

1. They have intense relationships with their band mates that will be more important to them than the relationship they have with you. Bands, man. It’s a wonder anyone in a band has time for a romantic relationship given how much time they spend bickering with each other over big egos, women, money, and God knows what else. Whether it’s an all-out Axl Rose and Slash situation or more of a slow-simmering Keith Richards and Mick Jagger resentment, band bros have more drama than the “Real Housewives” cast.

2. Women will throw themselves at your dude. Get used to it. It’s normal to feel a little jealous, but there’s no point in getting too insecure because this will happen after every show. And rightfully so! He looks hot up on that stage! I perfected the “watchful girlfriend off to the side” stance — not possessively hovering too close, but also making it clear to both him and the other chicks that I was watching.

3. You’ll be expected to go to not just some gigs, but probably a lot of gigs. One of the things I ultimately disliked about dating musicians is the expectation to go to all their shows and support them. Not just one or two shows. All their shows. If I’m in a relationship with someone, I of course want to support their career, but going to a bunch of gigs, especially ones that are late at night, can be a pretty hearty time commitment. It helps to bring friends you can hang out with.

4. He’ll go on tour, sometimes for a long while. Expect to be in a temporary LDR. If you’re comfortable with long absences, then this is great. But maybe you will be bothered by him missing your birthday because he has a gig in New Jersey, or inclined to paranoia that he’s got “a girl in every port.” Also, if you have pets or kids together, you should expect to do more of the care when he’s on tour. Make no mistake: these are all serious things to consider if you’re dating a successful musician.

5. He may never have any money … because he’s in a band, dude, and he’s suffering for his art. Expect to pay for more than your share/everything, but don’t get trapped into supporting him financially at the expense of your own career.

6. … unless he’s being financially supported by Mommy and Daddy. Cool setup for him? Sure. But this will get more fucking annoying for you than the girls or the dudes in his band. Twenty-something and thirty-something men who don’t pay their own bills have a warped view of reality. While there are plenty of musicians who have day jobs, there are more than a few trust fund brats.

7. There might be groupies. To this day I can still remember an ex-boyfriend’s most ardent groupie: she once showed up at his apartment unannounced while I was over because she was “just in the neighborhood.” He thought she was ridiculous, but he had to be polite to her because she was such a major fan. Think Mel on “Flight Of The Conchords”: mostly harmless, just annoying. Again, these people aren’t worth getting jealous or insecure about.

8. Expect to get a song as a present. A song is not a present (at least in my book), unless your name is Elton John and the song is “Your Song.” But if you date a musician, especially an impoverished musician, he’s going to write you a song in lieu of a more appropriate gift. I might possibly be bitter because I got a song for Valentine’s Day one year which appeared to have been written that same day.

9. He’s probably a night owl. Blame it on going onstage every night at 11, but a lot of successful musicians are creatures of the night. If you’re someone who works a 9-to-5 job and requires a full night’s sleep like I do, this is not a match. But if you’re also a night owl, then this relationship could work out great.

10. Creative people tend to have fragile egos. This is just a fact about all creative folks — writers like myself, actors, musicians, whatever. We put our souls into what we do, so we can’t help but take it very, very personally if people don’t like it — even if we’ve become successful doing it professionally. Speaking as one of those people, it takes awhile to develop thick skin. So handle with care: the sweet, sensitive guy who writes you love songs is also going to be sensitive about that nasty Pitchfork commenter.

11. Expect there to be drugs and alcohol. This is another fact: unless he and his bandmates are explicitly sober, they’re going to be around alcohol and probably drugs, too, and oftentimes getting it for free. Do with this information what you will.

12. If you go to bed with a writer, expect to wake up with shit written about you. This is a saying from my friend, our former “Mind Of Man” columnist John DeVore. Your musician boo may not write songs about you, exactly, but about your relationship or love in general. This can be very sweet. It can also be paranoia-inducing. But don’t be “that girl” who says he can’t write about you or worse, he has to write about you.

Anything else I forgot? Share it in the comments!


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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How to Charm and Marry an Asian Woman

We can freely say that for many men, women’s mind is like an ancient secret that they just cannot crack. This can be even trickier if you want to seduce a woman that is from another culture. There is no question about it, we are all defined by our communities, and our perspective on different aspects of life is influenced by the culture and people that surround us during your formative years.

Because of this, we are all different, and oftentimes it can be difficult to really get to know someone who is a foreigner. Maybe something that they do, you will find odd and vice versa. However, every now and then, a man meets a woman that intrigues him, and he is ready to do almost anything to charm her in order to spend the rest of his life with her.


Asian women are known for their delicate beauty, so it comes as no surprise that men all around the world are mesmerized by them. However, seducing them is no easy task. They have certain expectations when it comes to the man that they are going to marry. For some men, flirting might be an impossible task to complete, so if you are one of them, check out love-sites.com where you can find a few tricks that you can use. If you want to ensure that you will be successful in this quest, keep reading this article, because we are going to tell you what you have to do and how you have to act.

First of all, you have to be respectful.  We are not only talking about treating her nicely, but you also have to respect her family, culture, and customs. These things are extremely important to her, and if you come across as ill-mannered, then she is going to lose her interest immediately, and there is nothing you can do to change that.


Do not try to guess whether she is Japanese, Korean or Chinese. Not only is it rude to play this guessing game, but also she will not find it amusing. Instead, simply ask her where she grew up and let her tell you some stories about her childhood and family. It is completely normal to inquire about this information and she is probably going to ask you the same thing. Just, whatever you do, do not try to guess her ethnicity.

Furthermore, when it comes to family, show her how much you love and appreciate your parents because this is going to tell her a lot about your upbringing. Generally, speaking women love men that have a close relationship with their immediate family, and for Asian girls, this is even more important.

Why? Well, it is common in Asian culture for children to take care of their parents as they grow old. To them, there is nothing more important than family. Because of this, you have to be on your best behavior when you go to meet her parents. If they perceive you as impolite, then chances are that she is going to form the same opinion about you.

Next, when you meet a foreigner, the first thing that probably comes to your mind is to learn some basic phrases in their language. This is great! It shows that you are eager to get to know her, to learn about her language, customs, and so on. A simple phrase like “How are you?” will go a long way.


However, be careful. Over a thousand languages are spoken in Asia, so you shouldn’t assume what is her native language. If you don’t have this information and thus don’t want to come across as a fool, then a simple “Hi” in English is enough. Later on, you can inquire about the language and ask her to help you learn some phrases because we all know how difficult that can be. Just try not to make any assumptions.

Moreover, if you want to have children in the future, this is definitely something that you can bring up. But maybe not on the first date, the moment you meet. As already discussed, the family is the most important thing in their lives, so it is natural that they want to have one of their own. Keep in mind that they probably come from one-child families, which means that she has never had the experience of growing up with siblings. Due to this, she might want to have more than one kid. If you agree with this, mention it and she is probably going to perceive you as husband material.

In addition, show her that you have a successful career. This might seem wrong, but in reality, it is really important for Asian women, simply because they have grown up in patriarchal communities where the men work and take financial care of their families. They want to know that you are going to care for them and ensure that they have everything they need. They do not want to spend the rest of their lives living from paycheck to paycheck and this is definitely something that they don’t want their children to experience.


What’s more, demonstrate to her that you have big plans for the future. Women are looking for someone who is serious, who has great plans for his life, both professional and private. Generally, speaking they do not want a man who is going to be satisfied with a mediocre job and who is going to spend every afternoon in front of a TV or online. Talk about your interests, things that you like to do in your free time, skills that you have mastered or countries you have visited.

To sum up, in this article we have given you some guidance when it comes to your behavior if you want to charm an Asian woman. If you have just met, you should definitely take things slow, and give yourself and her the opportunity to see if you want to pursue this relationship further. As you know, connecting with some on a more personal level can take some time, so be patient and see how to thing develop.


Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Sun Stories: Jazmin – Guess Girl – Chapter 9

A few weeks passed and I hadn’t seen or heard from Jaz in a while. The time we spent together was so scorching I somehow felt she’d come back in.

But maybe our one encounter was all that it should be. One girl’s initiation to her sexual identity and that was it. I’ve lived a long and colorful life. Things are great for me now and I don’t really care where the dice fall anymore because I control every throw.

What happened between Jaz and me was absolutely amazing and I hope she’s okay with it mentally. Because that shit can kick in later and ruin your life.

What we did is controlled and weird. I’ve sacrificed my whole livelihood at this salon for a sexual encounter on school grounds. I’ve done things in the past but nothing like this. If this goes bad, I’ve blown the relationship with Achilles, the salon, the gym and everything.

What the fuck have I done for the sake of my dalliances?

I’ve always been driven by my dark desires. They’ve ruled my life for decades. It’s like sin just comes to me. I’m the weak, innocent good guy that evil just slithers into.

I’ve met so many people in my life, and whatever it is I give off, the evil just comes in and takes me, and I do it. I love it. I’m so depressed and all of my anxiety is always there, I just fall into some dark relief.

I want to understand it and control it, but there’s a part of me that loves vice. That charge I get from illicit behavior gives me the minutes of relief I desperately crave.

Innocent Jazmin has brought a new dish to the table. I can’t stop thinking about the fable she has brought me through innocence, ignorance, tradition, and moral beliefs. I’m the gentle shaman that wants to help, and my sweetheart guides me with kindness, but I’m driven by my dark desire to take her in the most insidious ways.

Not the pig at the bar… but a gentleman that relieves her of her virginity in a worse way. I build trust and then rob her house.

I can’t do that with this one.

I’ve never done that with anyone. But I think that about myself and it simply isn’t true.

I’m not that guy.

Or am I?

But the control here pushes my mind to dark places.

I think of my daughter and sisters and know that I’m not that guy.

Why did I do this thing with Jazmin?

I’m just driven by darkness and errant behavior.

All the shit I run through my head on a daily basis.

I’m working at the salon. It’s Tuesday night. It’s slow. It’s Winter. Nobody comes into tan. You’d think they would but they don’t and it sucks.

A woman comes into tan. It’s 7:45. She’s trying to figure out what tanning lotion she should buy. I just want to go to the bar around the corner and have a Manhattan and a sandwich.

I just want to close and I hate when people come in late. Then another woman walks in behind her. I’m focusing on number one lady and I’m like, what the fuck, I just want to get out of here.

But as number one lady is digging through the basket of lotion packets, Number 2 silently mouths the following words to me:

“Do you want to eat my pussy?”

It’s Jazmin.




GEEK TO FLEEK Women are sharing their jaw-dropping transformations from gawky teens into gorgeous adults – and it’s hard to believe they’re the same person

GROWING up is a tough time with puberty filled with raging hormones, acne, braces and questionable fashion choices.

Our teenage years are usually referred to as our awkward phase, before we learned how to cut our hair and properly apply make-up.

 This woman definitely looks better with teeth

This woman definitely looks better with teeth.

Proving the glow-up is real, these woman have shared throwback snaps revealing how far they’ve come.

Photos show awkward teens with puppy fat, no eyebrows, some seriously emo looks and a very questionable wardrobe.

But over the years these women have grown into their features, dressed to flatter their shape – and learned to lay off the purple eye shadow.

They shared their transformation to Reddit’s Ugly Duckling thread, and we can’t believe some of these photos are of the same person.

No weigh

 This woman looks completely different after shedding some pounds

This woman looks completely different after shedding some pounds.

Red alert

 We love how she's rocking her natural beauty

We love how she’s rocking her natural beauty.

Brace yourself

 The awkward teen phase is strong with braces and glasses

The awkward teen phase is strong with braces and glasses.

Swept away

 Is this really the same woman? Unbelievable

Is this really the same woman? Unbelievable.

Eye say

 We're loving her sense of humour coming through in the photo

We’re loving her sense of humor coming through in the photo.

Blonde ambition

 The new hair colour on this woman totally transforms her

The new hair color on this woman totally transforms her.

On the fringe

 The shine on her hair is absolutely unreal - we need deets

The shine on her hair is absolutely unreal – we need deets.

Jump through hoops

 The hairstyle may be similar but her whole look has evolved

The hairstyle may be similar but her whole look has evolved.

Something blue

 Her beautiful blue eyes have been unleashed from behind her glasses

Her beautiful blue eyes have been unleashed from behind her glasses.

Say cheese

 The look is different but the smile is the same

The look is different but the smile is the same.

Get the chop

 This woman is totally rocking that bob - we love it!

This woman is totally rocking that bob – we love it!

Back to black

 The black and white photo still makes her look like a Hollywood star

The black and white photo still makes her look like a Hollywood star.Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.


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