How to Attract the Opposite Sex

For most people, there comes a moment where we wish we had been able to convert that fleeting moment with the mysterious stranger into dinner, a kiss or maybe just a conversation. Wherever it is, and whoever it is that you wish to attract, there’s a lot that you can do to increase your chances out there. Here are a few basic pointers to help out.

Steps

  1. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 1

    Meet other people by going out in public. This begins before you even leave the house. Are you going to get some coffee at your favorite café? Walk past a full length mirror before you take off. You may like to lounge around in pajamas while at home, but that’s not a way to grab someone’s attention when you’re out and about.

    • Buy clothes that you feel comfortable in– you don’t want to look stiff. The whole point is that you show you care about how you look, but not too much.
    • Dress appropriately; if tonight’s plans are to go to the hip industrial dance club, then by all means, wear your Doc Martens and leather wrist bands. Just don’t go from the club to the uptown bar unless you truly think you can pull it off. Being comfortable starts by not addressing stares. More importantly though, looking good often means feeling good and that definitely pays off.
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    Become a more self-actualized person. Aside from what you are wearing, always remember that the mind is the largest erogenous zone. Be culturally aware and interesting. Knowing a little bit of most topics. Truly knowing about the things that really interest you will genuinely make you a more interesting person.
    • Music seems to link many people together. Knowing about bands you don’t even listen to is a great social lubricant because “not knowing” shuts down avenues of conversation dead in their tracks. However, saying you’ve heard Joy Division and really like “She’s Lost Control,” but think it’s a little monotonous shows the other person that you’ve already given something they like a try to don’t like it; likewise, this gives you a little time to catch up and formulate a change in topic, thus steering the conversation into more familiar territory.
    • Know yourself well enough that you feel comfortable disagreeing. Nothing is more boring and pointless than someone who always agrees. The other person could be so attractive your eyes glaze over, but listen to them really process what they are saying. Allow the words, “I totally disagree…” to roll off your tongue. This doesn’t make you a jerk. It makes you a better person because you’re putting yourself out there. Plus, it cuts down on your vulnerability to the other person and transfers it to them.
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    Laugh at their jokes. It’ll make them feel more comfortable, confident, and relaxed around you. Just don’t overdo it.
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    Develop a style. Any style will do, as long as it’s your own. Uniqueness is crucial because it is what differentiates you in the sea of “other fish” this person has no doubt been told are out there. If you really like that goofy hat at the vintage clothing store and you think it looks good on you, wear it out. Don’t be discouraged if people think you’re goofy, chances are you wouldn’t even want to meet those people anyway.
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    Mirror the other person’s actions. This not only shows them that you’re flattered with them, it also shows that you are noticing their actions.
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    Flirt physically. Casual touches are a great way to gauge the direction of things. If the other person seems comfortable with you touching their hand or brushing their arm, then you have a good litmus for their attraction to you.

    • You may want to start by simple flirting.
  7. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 7
    Make eye contact. Look into the other person’s eyes whenever talking. The eyes have been called the window to the soul. Admire them. Genuinely appreciate the other person. Just don’t stare for too long. Studies have shown that a person generally will gaze into another person’s eyes for about 4.5 seconds if they are attracted to them.
  8. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 8
    Eat. If you are self conscious about your weight, hashing out that insecurity by forgoing a meal in front of the person you like is not the right thing to do. It makes people uneasy when the person they are with is basically watching them eat.
  9. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 9

    Keep yourself clean and trimmed. Clearly, you wouldn’t want a smelly trash monster in your bed, so don’t be a stink factory. Also, if you find yourself a little less than fresh in the wrong place at the right time, freshen up in the bathroom first. Easily explain this to the other person by telling them to “wait” gently.

    • If someone should joke about their hygiene, cut them some slack and joke with them about it to ease the tension.
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    Exchange phone numbers, email addresses, etc. Often the hardest thing isn’t the “waiting three days” part, it’s the time when you need to pop the question.
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    Ask the person out again, if it’s clear you should take the initiative. You should gauge who needs to do this by your first meeting. Feel out what you have been talking about. Maybe the other person needs to get off the train at the next stop and you’ve been talking for the past 15 minutes on your way to work. In that case, ask them if you can call sometime. However, maybe you just bumped into someone at the bar and chatted for a few minutes; in that case give them your number and tell them you’d like to go out sometime. The difference is always in the comfort level you and that person have established. Obviously asking someone you barely know for their number is awkward for both of you, but if you’ve had enough time to build a decent connection then it’s easier for the other person to give up those precious digits.
  12. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 12
    Never say “nothing” if a guy asks what your interests are. Don’t say “eh nothing”. Talk about it. He obviously wants to know. Even if it’s something extraordinary, don’t make a fuss about it.
  13. Image titled Attract the Opposite Sex Step 13
    Make plans. This might sound totally crazy, but in the initial few weeks of dating it’s nice to know there is a regular schedule that the two of you can count on. If you feel brave, call the person and ask them what they are doing a few days ahead of the “date day” and then tell them something came up and reschedule. Only do this if you need to build tension. Exercise common sense; but at the same time, this gets the other person stewing if they really wanted to see you in the first place.

 

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Sun Stories: Jazmin – Guess Girl – Chapter 4

I have one day to sort out this mess.  A predicament that most men would leap at, but I’m scared. It’s wrong, right? Twenty four-year old, super hot, Persian girl wants me to pleasure her orally and I’m having second thoughts. Am I insane? I should have just thrown her on to the sink in the back of the salon and went to town. (See: Kita – Reckoning, and Double Dip – Chapter 3)

But I’m a gentleman, and even though sex has always just come to me, I’ve always been cautious. Because when you love something so much, you need to be careful with it. I’ve always been who I am and apparently sex hits my windshield like a stray deer. That’s been my life. Whether I had a guitar in my hands or a pen. I’m just that guy.

Unlike most men, I’ve never pursued sex. I love romance. Dinners. Holding hands and stolen kisses has always been my forte. I’m a great date. A shitty husband, but a great dad and a damn good date.

But beyond that, I want to be alone. I want to be amazing to you ladies on an occasional basis.

I have to figure out this crazy proposal and there is only one guy I can go to regarding this kind of madness.

Johnny R. He’s my beloved friend who is turning forty this year. (See: any Johnny R. post. He’s an animal)

Johnny loves cigarettes, Budweiser, Adderal, cocaine, strippers, hookers and gambling. So he’s the immoral friend I should call during this crisis.

“Dude. So I ate out Kita in the gym.”

“I’m so proud of you. That little slope owed you.”

“Yea, it was amazing. She’s adorbs.”

“I hate when you use abbreviations.”

“I know, but she is like… delish.”

“There you go again.”

“So I went down on Kita, and some chick from a store across the street saw me and now she’s pulling some extortion shit on me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I went down on Kita in the gym and a chick from Guess across the street saw us and now she’s making trouble.”

“Oh fuck, dude. That’s bad. Are we talking exposure? Cops? The media?”

“Well, apparently. But not if I do what she wants.

Dude. This is horrible. What does she want?” Money?”

Umm. No. She wants me to eat her pussy like I did Kita.”

The phone fell silent.

“Hello?”

“Dude. Are you fucking insane? She’s a Persian girl with a freight car full of emotional and religious baggage. She can’t do anything and she wants you to swab out her box?

“Apparently.”

“Do it!”

“Really?”

“She’s saving her virginity for Raheem or whatever, but you have the opportunity to please her like no one ever has before! Remember the Indian chick I slammed in New York on the back of a dumpster who was a virgin before her wedding?”

“You make an important point there, Johnny.”

“She’s not blackmailing you. She’s seen an opportunity for sex and she wants it really bad.”

“Really? It all just seems weird to me. Because all of my stuff is always pretty normal now.”

“Just lean in and do what you’re great at. What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

 

“I get fired and she files a rape charge and I go to jail.”

 

“Do it!”