One of the hardest parts of dating today can be how much of your most intimate interactions happen over text. Sometimes, people can be intimidated by the vulnerable task of turning someone down, so it makes sense that they might turn to texting. However, there are certainly ways to do it empathetically and respectfully. But when it comes to the worst rejection text you can receive, many women have memories of that one specific text that was meaner than all of the rest.
Rejection can be hard to stomach, even when you’re kept in the loop with how the other person is feeling. When you’re rejected in a way that’s cold, disrespectful, or confusing, it can feel so painful. But remember that the feelings you’re experiencing are valid and won’t last forever. This rejection has nothing to do with your intrinsic value as a person. Take this as a one-way ticket to not having to deal with this person’s pettiness any longer. It can take time to get over what you wanted the relationship to be, but at the very least, you can celebrate the fact that this person has revealed their true colors, then shown themselves out of your life.
When They Are Just Down Right Confusing…
I got ghosted by a guy, but I left my watch at his house. He eventually responded with some BS, like, ‘Things have just been so busy.’ But then he mailed my watch to my work. It took like a month, but then after that he was like, ‘Wanna hang out some time?’ I lied and said I was seeing someone.
— Rochelle, 27
When They Say You Were Just Friends But…
One time I was seeing a guy, and this was back in high school, so bare with me, but we went from texting everyday all the time to nothing. Then, I saw that he and his ex-GF had posted the same photo together of their hands and the caption was, ‘forever.’ And then I texted him and he said he thought we were just friends. I don’t know about y’all, but I don’t tell my friends that I want to make out with them all the time!
— Hayley, 25
When They Clearly Can’t Be Bothered To Be Nice…
One time, someone from Tinder came over my house at like 1:00 a.m., we didn’t even hook up, only made out, and they left after forcing me to watch a French animated film with them. The next day, we were texting casually and I mentioned that they forgot their lighter at my house. Their reply was ‘Well it’s a good thing they’re not hard to come by’ and then ghosted me. But still follows me on IG two years later.
— Qualeasha, 25
When They Pull The Ex Card And It Sucks…
My worst rejection text was from a guy I had been seeing for a few weeks, but already really liked. He was the first person since my ex that I could really imagine having a future with. One day, seemingly out of the blue, he sent me this long text telling me what an amazing person I am, and that he’s been really struggling about making this decision, but he felt as if he needed to give things a shot with his ex. I was so crushed by it because he was so kind about it. It would’ve been easier to move on if he behaved like a jerk — but because he rejected me so nicely, it was somehow harder to get closure. It seriously took me a year or more to fully move on from that.
— Hannah, 26
When Things Get Kind Of Awkward…
A guy reached out to me saying I was hot and that he would pay me for foot pics, but then ghosted once I sent pics.
— Meghan, 24
When Someone Else Does The Rejecting For Them…
This guy that I was dating in college was cheating on me for a while, but I didn’t know until his other GF sent me a picture of the two of them together. She went on a whole rant about how I should stay away from her man, but I failed to see how it my fault. That was technically not a rejection from him but it sure helped me understand what was going on.
— Annie, 23
When They’re Just Straight Up Mean…
One time, a guy I went on a date with texted me that I was cat-fishing him because I am fatter IRL It was humiliating and painful, but TBH, I have grown so much since then. There are so many people out there that think fat people are hot and won’t treat us like dirt. I am glad that my partner now thinks the world of me and that guy is probably very unhappy, wherever he is.
— Jessie, 27
When They Beat Around The Bush…
One time, I got a semi-rejection from this girl I went on a date with and had a really good time with. She was like, ‘I thought that you were so great and beautiful! I hope that you have success.’ And, OK, at first that doesn’t seem like a bad rejection text, but the conversation kept being her praising me a bunch and not answering my questions about hanging out again. She didn’t want to go on another date and instead of just saying so she was just showering me with platitudes that I’m great. Like, I know I am great, I just need you to be up front with me!
— Alysia, 26
It’s clear that there are a lot of folks out there that don’t necessarily know how to turn someone down in a way that is both kind and respectful. Don’t worry: There are plenty of people out there that will treat you like the star you are. And even though a rejection can sting in the moment, you will go on to find an even stronger connection.
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