Murder Mystery Weekend – Chapter 26

– “Until the relationship ends?” asked Eliza. I had succeeded in catching her interest.

– “No. Longer.” I said. “Made that mistake ages ago. A buddy of mine broke up with his girlfriend. The way he described it, the relationship was over. He hated her guts. I waited a week or so, but I’d always been curious about her. So I asked her out. He was furious. It cost me a friendship. And he was right to be pissed off at me.”

– “Somehow I have the feeling that this lengthy explanation will eventually come around to me.” said Ee. “Are you trying to spare my feelings?”

– “I’m telling you the truth, Ee. When we started hanging out together, I would have had to be blind not to notice you. To be 100% honest, I noticed both of you. But …”

– “But?”

– “But Claire is Leo’s sister. I didn’t know how he would take it. Besides, as time went on, I began to realize that Claire wasn’t for me, anyway. She and I both know that. We wouldn’t last as a couple. You, on the other hand …”

– “What about me?” said Eliza.

– “Lovely. Kind and generous. Smart. All that I could ask for in a woman. Except that my best friend confided in me one night, over a couple of beers, that he was madly in love with you. I couldn’t go after you, Ee. Not after Leo told me how he felt.”

Eliza was a smart girl. On top of that, she had a heart as big as all outdoors. She understood all too well what I was telling her.

– “That’s so unfair.” she said. But her tone of voice suggested that she didn’t mean it.

– “Eliza, tell me this: if you were really interested in Craig, but Claire said something first, would you say something to him? Would you try to beat her to him?”

– “What if she tried with him, and it didn’t work out?” she asked.

I didn’t even answer. I just looked at her sympathetically.

– “Aww, fuck.” she said.

– “I would never say ‘no’ to you, Ee. But I couldn’t do that to Leo.”

– “Sometimes I wish that the two of us weren’t so noble.” she admitted.

– “I’m not particularly noble, Ee – as I’m sure Claire told you. But if it was to be you and me, I would want it to start out right.”

– “Alright. I got it.” She sighed. “Now, would you get me a drink?”

I did as she asked, and helped myself to another.

– “You’re not the Falcon, are you?” I asked her.

Eliza swatted me on the arm. “You dirty bugger! Trying to catch me in a moment of weakness, are you?”

– “You’re playing a deep game.” I said. “I can’t tell whose side you’re on. But there are at least two sides. And the time may soon come when you’ll need to choose one. I’m holding the door open. But I’m not sure how long I can do that.”

– “Who’s on your side?” she asked me.

– “I’m more certain about who’s on the other side.” I gave Eliza a brief, edited version of my run-in with Ben and Barbara earlier on.

– “Why is this Bible important?” she asked.

I did my best impression of a sphinx.

– “Fine.” she said. “But that means that Claire told them. I know she gave it to you. She tells me everything.”

– “She’s on their side – even if she doesn’t know it yet. I think Craig is, too. But I’m not sure if sharing the treasure is part of Ben and Barb’s plan. My team still has room for some charter members.”

– “You don’t have a team.” she observed.

– “Which is why full shares of the treasure are still available.” I told her. “Get in early, before all of the best seats are taken.”

That was when we heard four bells from upstairs.

Eliza reached up, slowly, and touched my cheek. “Thank you, Colin, for being honest with me. I’m still not happy – but this makes it easier to accept.”

We parted as friends. My next duty station made me nervous, in more ways than one. I knew who it was.

 

https://lapetitemort17.wordpress.com/?p=312

 

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If You Start Dating Your Best Friend, Remember These 6 Important Things

So, it happened. You caught feelings for your BFF. When a relationship starts out platonic and blossoms into something more, it can be tricky to know how to navigate the shift. But let’s say you’ve done it — you’ve expressed your feelings, you both have a crush, and you decide to take the leap into romantic territory. Yay! When you start dating your best friend, it’s exciting and scary at the same time. You know this person well, and they’re already your go-to pal, but now you also get to make out with them on the reg. What a time to be alive.

As thrilling as it is, though, dating your bestie doesn’t always come as naturally as you might expect. After all, it’s a big change from your former status as “just friends.” When you become romantically involved, your relationship is going to be different than it was before. And it requires some intentional thought as to how you’re going to make things work. “Everything will change,” explains Jennifer B. Rhodes, PsyD. “Expecting it will help you cultivate the flexibility you will need to move through the transition.” It’s important to stay open to change so you can work through it together as a couple.

If you’ve just started dating your best friend, keep the following things in mind to help your relationship thrive.

1. YOU BOTH NEED TO BE ON THE SAME PAGE.

This is important in any new relationship, but especially with BFFs, you risk hurt feelings if one of you wants something more serious than the other does. “Questions such as, ‘Are you monogamous?’ or, ‘Are you entering the murky water of FWB?’ will need to be answered,” says dating coach Julie Spira. “If one wants to have a casual relationship or FWB, and the other is falling in love, it will backfire. Make sure you’re on the same page, and it will help with the bumps on the road.”

2. DEVELOPING A ROUTINE WILL HELP YOU ADJUST.

When you transition from friends into romantic partners, your schedules will need to adapt to meet this shift. Don’t expect that you’ll be spending the same amount of time together as you did when you were friends — it might be more or less, depending on what feels right for both of you. “Do you have a standing date night such as Saturday night, or are you spending the entire weekend together?” Spira wonders. “Once you get in a groove, your relationship will grow like any other.” The sooner you can figure out how often you want to see each other, the easier time you will have settling into the relationship.

3. YOU MIGHT BE TEMPTED TO MOVE TOO QUICKLY.

Unlike dating someone you just met, you already know this person extremely well. It’s a huge plus because you know how to have fun together, but it can also make it feel like your romantic relationship is farther along than it really is. Don’t risk getting too serious too quickly. “Just like every relationship, you need to go through the phases,” Spira explains. “To go from being BFFs to moving in overnight isn’t a good idea.” Remember that even though you have history together, this dating partnership is new for both of you. The more careful you can be about taking your time, the less likely you are to get too deep into something you can’t sustain.

4. YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY WILL BE CURIOUS.

The people in your life know you two as friends, so they’ll need time to adjust to you being a couple. You might not need to introduce your SO to your friends and family (if they already know him or her), but you will need to introduce them as your partner. Be intentional about this. “Let’s not forget about your extended group of friends who will now be seeing you as a couple instead of two close friends,” Spira notes. She says that telling your squad might be scary, but it’s important to do it whenever you feel comfortable.

You can tell them together or separately, whatever feels more natural — but try to emphasize how excited you are for this next step. It doesn’t mean you’ll lose your friendships with them, just that things will be a little different from now on. Your friends should be excited to see you happy, and it’ll help you feel like a more established couple if you get your love out into the open when you’re ready.

5. YOUR COMMUNICATION TACTICS MAY NEED TO SHIFT.

Don’t expect that you’ll be able to communicate the same way you have in the past. Even if you’re accustomed to talking about vulnerable things, the subjects you discuss will change a bit. “The more you can communicate about your needs and desires, the easier it is for your partner to be their best and vice-versa,” Spira says. With BFFs, you don’t need to have conversations about defining the relationship, physical boundaries, or sexual preferences. As partners, these will all become important topics to discuss. Don’t shy away from the tough stuff because you’re nervous about how the conversation will go — instead, consider open communication essential to deepening your bond.

6. STAYING OPEN TO CHANGE IS YOUR KEY TO SUCCESS.

As much as you loved your friendship, you’re starting a new chapter now. And this is going to bring about change — there’s no doubt about it. But if you go in knowing this, you’ll be open to rolling with the transitions as they come. “Don’t take each other for granted,” Spira emphasizes. You’ve been in each other’s lives for a long time, but don’t let that make you complacent! “Allow the relationship to grow in a natural way, and decide together if you’re working towards a future together,” Spira suggests. Just like any other relationship, you’ll grow together in stages, so embrace the process and keep an open mind.

When it’s pursued with intention, dating your best friend can be pure magic. “Having a romantic partner who is your best friend is like winning the love lottery,” Spira says. “Enjoy and savor every moment.” It’s so exciting to take your relationship to the next level, even if it’s not always easy. Remember why you got along so well in the first place, and use that as a foundation to help your romantic life blossom into something even greater.

 

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Cherie – Chapter 52 – Happy Birthday

Life has it’s ups and downs. I know Cherie has been struggling with paying for school. But for the most part, I think everything will work out. I know she felt bad about asking me for money but I think that’s behind us now.

I mean, how bad is my life? I like to work. I like being busy and get bored when I’m idle. I enjoy my alone time. But I have an active social life.

All of my past relationships follow a similar path. A traditional path and they all failed in the same way. There was a pattern I was following and it always led to the same failure. So this time I’m doing something different and it’s working perfectly for my mind and lifestyle.

Cherie meets all of the criteria to be in a successful relationship with me. I think I’ve finally found the Rosetta Stone to a happy life with a woman for me.

  1. She’s on the right side of 30. We all know by now I love youth and beauty. I don’t care what anybody thinks about that. If you had the chance to drive an old Subaru or a new Maserati, which would be the obvious choice?
  2. She lives 40 miles away. There’ll be no swinging by, or stopping in. I live in the city and have no reason to own an automobile anymore. So I can’t really get out there to see her. I mean, I could, but where do I stay? She lives with her parents and she has a 6 year old son. Her sister lives there too, and I know there’s a couple of other little ones living there. She can’t bring me into that mix. At least not yet, and I’m fine with that.
  3. I only see her once or twice a month. That’s plenty for me. She’s so busy with work and school and son, there’s very little time to get down here to see me. I don’t need tons of girlfriend time. It’s too emotionally draining for me. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. I really appreciate our limited time together. I’m not one of these men that needs a woman in his life all of the time. It’s just annoying.
  4. She’s a certified nymphomaniac. What guy doesn’t want this? A hot, young, fit babe that is deadly in the sack. She’s so orgasmic that you always feel like a virile beast when you’re making love to her. I’m not getting any younger and am a former hypersexual myself, so at my age I’m truly blessed to have a young lady who is always horny for me.
  5. She doesn’t want any more children. Okay, this is huge. This has been the deal breaker in my last THREE relationships. Cherie has been a parent for six years. You grow up fast when you have a baby or a small child counting on you for everything and not much assistance. I don’t want any more children, and this could end up being the ideal arrangement for me at last. All of these chicks I’ve been with have been in the same age range and they are still trying to figure out who they are. It’s sad that there’s this ridiculous extended adolescence in this country. But it’s almost always the same model. They go out and party, go out to dinner, go on trips and buy a bunch of designer shit in their twenties all while burning through a string of dudes. Then they finally attach themselves to some sap and marry him. His income helps neutralize and pay down her revolving debt. They get a house, a dog and then kids start happening. In 10 years they’ve either become roommates or divorced and he pays thousands of dollars in child support to her. Hopefully he doesn’t repeat the mistake again. Or… they live happily ever after!

Cherie is the perfect blend of the ingredients that make the perfect romantic cocktail to compliment my lifestyle. I just hope we can maintain this level. After college she’ll have to go to medical school, so for now… there’s no end in sight!

Anyway, I was sitting in Cavanaugh’s last Monday and thankfully realized that Cherie’s birthday was on Friday.

It has been a year since we had her birthday lunch at Misconduct Tavern. Back then I gave her a $20 gift card to Starbucks and some Godiva chocolates. I had only been dating her a month and didn’t want to set the bar too high. I remember her saying all she wanted for her birthday was to have sex with me. A week later we were holed up at the Club Quarters for 24 hours just banging away for the very first time. Man, that was an incredible day. We fucked like rabbits!

So I went to ProFlowers and ordered a dozen long stem roses in a pretty vase and a little box of chocolates for my love. They were delivered to her home and I’m positive she wasn’t expecting them.  So she squealed with delight.

Now I’m the one who owes her some birthday sex!

She’s 28 years old now! Let’s keep this relationship going, Cherie!

 

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