California Dreamin’ – 1982 to 1984 – Chapter 9 – El Paso & Las Cruces

We pulled into El Paso, Texas at dusk. It’s right on the Mexican border. The Rio Grande river is right there. The part of town we were in looked and felt like we weren’t in America anymore. It looked like Mexico. The food was Mexican, and all of the songs on the jukebox were in Spanish.

El Paso (/ɛl ˈpæs/ el PASS-oh; from Spanish, “the pass”) is a city in and the seat of El Paso County, Texas, United States. It is situated in the far western corner of the U.S. state of Texas.

El Paso stands on the Rio Grande river across the Mexico–United States border from Ciudad Juárez, the largest city in the Mexican state of Chihuahua. The two cities, along with Las Cruces in the neighboring U.S. state of New Mexico, form a combined international metropolitan area sometimes referred to as the Paso del Norte or El Paso–Juárez–Las Cruces. The region of over 2.7 million people constitutes the largest bilingual and binational work force in the Western Hemisphere.[6][7]

The city is the headquarters of Western Refining, a Fortune 500 company, and three publicly traded companies,[8] as well as home to the Medical Center of the Americas,[9] the only medical research and care provider complex in West Texas and southern New Mexico,[10] and the University of Texas at El Paso, the city’s primary university. The city hosts the annual Sun Bowl college football post-season game, the second oldest bowl game in the country.[11]

El Paso has a strong federal and military presence. William Beaumont Army Medical CenterBiggs Army Airfield, and Fort Bliss call the city home. Fort Bliss is one of the largest military complexes of the United States Army and the largest training area in the United States.[12] Also headquartered in El Paso are the DEA domestic field division 7El Paso Intelligence CenterJoint Task Force NorthU.S. Border Patrol El Paso Sector, and U.S. Border Patrol Special Operations Group (SOG).

In 2010, El Paso received an All-America City Award. El Paso has been ranked the safest large city in the U.S. for four consecutive years[13] and has ranked in the top three since 1997.[14] As of July 1, 2016, the population estimate for the city from the U.S. Census was 683,080.[3] Its U.S. metropolitan area covers all of El Paso and Hudspeth counties in Texas, and has a population of 841,971.[3] The El Paso metropolitan area forms part of the larger El Paso–Las Cruces CSA, with a population of 1,056,178.[3]

It was alien and cool for both of us but we always appreciated cities that looked different than the rest of America.

We had a beer in this border town but pushed on to Las Cruces New Mexico which was so close just on the eastern edge of New Mexico. We stay there without incident.

As I write this memoir I think about what Frank and I did on the trip. When we were in Georgia his Uncle took us to the greatest strip joint on Earth and I saw things I;d never seen before.

Funny thing is, looking back on this journey, Frank and I saw some vice in New Orleans but nothing major. You would think that two boys, 19 and 21 would have terrorized the countryside as we made our way across the country. We did nothing of the kind.

We drove the van all day on the way to our destination and loved the sites we saw along the way. But never did we stop and find the vice and dark fun in any of the towns we visited. We simply crashed, drank beer and watched TV in the hotel rooms we stayed in. We could have strayed and gotten into it with the locals, but maybe with him being an immigrant and me and my anxiety we just wanted to get where we were going.

It was an unspoken goal. Frank wanted to go on an adventure with someone he trusted and eventually his friends would follow. We’d have a band in LA and see what happened. He ultimately wanted to become a barrister in London. I wanted to be a rock star meta god and that was it. So here we were.

We’ll see what happens. He’s a helluva bass player so we’ll make it happen somehow. I’ve been uprooted from my life by my father’s design but I am out from under him.

Who takes their son out of high school before senior year? Oh I don’t know… a selfish self-centered cunt? (Frank’s words not mine, but mine with out a voice.) Once Janice was in Franklin and Marshall my dad was like fuck the rest of the kids in this family I’m moving them to the shore. I’ve exhausted all of my mistresses and some of them are pregnant. We here at the Provident National Bank are buried in bad loans and I need to go. I’ve painted myself into a corner and the love of my life Eileen is gone.

I will cling to Helen and the kids and dump my father’s inheritance into a gigantic over improved shore house a block from the beach in Wildwood NJ.

I think these thoughts as the 1969 Volkswagen mini bus carries my buddy and I from Belfast Northern Ireland across the desert on highway 10 into New Mexico.

I am away from my father. I love him but why? He has taught me everything I know. He taught me how to read, ride a bike, science, life, sex, people, women, everything. Why am I struggling?  Because he was so HARD on me.

Why did he have to say those things to me? Those words. Why was he so insecure? Why did he hit me? I can’t leave you dad or hit you back. I can’t fight a bully because you’re the best at that.

You were bullied as a boy. Why would you bully, hurt and scare me? What’s wrong with you?

You’re so nice. You’re a good father to my sisters but mom has a different story.  She’s your ultimate victim. Why dad? She’s been a victim her whole life. You describe her as this Japanese servant, That is some disrespectful shit Horace.

She suffered at the end of your tongue night after night. I heard you hurting with your words while she was raising your 4 kids while your tongue pleasures your mistress Eileen.

Fuck you.

A man’s word is everything. If you don’t have your word you’re nothing. You fucking liar.

My sweet sisters don’t know you. You told me everything you are when you were old. You told me the truth because you lied about so many things.

You’ve never had an original thought in your life. You love your wife because that poor woman put up with your crazy shit, you love your books because that’s where you stole all of the information you had in your head to get what you want, and you love your kids.

I believe that. You did love us dad. I know you did. As fucked up as you were. I know you loved us all so much. But I’m finally out from under your rule for good.

The 69 VW minibus rolls forward on highway 10. further than she’s ever been from the beaches of North Wildwood.

This family vehicle that was acquired in 1970 could never have imagined she would be making runs back and forth to Frankford high in Philly, and then becoming my vessel in Wildwood for fun and frivolity, But now here she is in New Mexico carrying the misfit son of the family to California to be a musician.

Frank hands me a Harp and I swig that sweet cold baby back. We’re going to California to be rock stars.

Las Cruces was nice and quiet and we’re nearly finished with our journey across America.

Las Cruces, also known as “The City of the Crosses”, is the seat of Doña Ana County, New Mexico, United States. As of the 2010 census the population was 97,618,[2] and in 2015 the estimated population was 101,643,[4] making it the second largest city in the state, after Albuquerque. Las Cruces is the largest city in both Doña Ana County and southern New Mexico.[5] The Las Cruces metropolitan area had an estimated population of 213,676 in 2014.[6] It is the principal city of a metropolitan statistical area which encompasses all of Doña Ana County and is part of the larger El Paso–Las Cruces combined statistical area.

Las Cruces is the economic and geographic center of the Mesilla Valley, the agricultural region on the floodplain of the Rio Grande which extends from Hatchto the west side of El Paso, Texas. Las Cruces is the home of New Mexico State University (NMSU), New Mexico’s only land-grant university. The city’s major employer is the federal government on nearby White Sands Test Facility and White Sands Missile Range. The Organ Mountains, 10 miles (16 km) to the east, are dominant in the city’s landscape, along with the Doña Ana MountainsRobledo Mountains, and Picacho Peak. Las Cruces lies 225 miles (362 km) south of Albuquerque, 48 miles (77 km) northwest of El Paso, Texas and 46 miles (74 km) north of the Mexican border at Santa Teresa.

Spaceport America, which lies 55 miles (89 km) to the north and with corporate offices in Las Cruces, has seen the completion of several successful manned, suborbital flights. The city is also the headquarters for Virgin Galactic, the world’s first company to offer sub-orbital spaceflights.[7]

Next stop… Arizona!

 

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Sun Stories: Kita – Chapter 2 – Art Imitates Life

Kita  –  Madiera High School

Sometimes writing this blog is a grind. Most of the time it is an absolute pleasure and has become a form of therapy.  When you live in your relationships you can’t really see what’s happening. When you think about it you still don’t have it, because your lost in your feelings and thoughts. When you tell your friends about it there’s something in that, but when you write about it you get it all out. There’s a clarity and finality that comes from that. When you take a pen to paper or hand to keyboard, you finally get it all out. You’ve documented what’s happening today and what’s happened to you in the past. By writing about the experience, you finally tell the story and resolve it. You get it all out. You can fire off all of your feelings and let it go. It’s amazing and feels so good. This has been a cathartic exercise for me and I’m so happy I finally dug in and told all of these stories.

Rather than carry them around with me in my head, it’s a glorious dopamine rush and an opportunity to spend these rounds here on WordPress.  It’s like you’ve been carrying heavy groceries of good and bad products from your life and you finally get the opportunity to set them down and take a rest. You pick up the good food and take it home with you and leave the rotten fruit at the curb. It’s been a beautiful journey and I appreciate all of you reading this right now who have chosen to join me on this journey.

I normally only write about people I know. But I wrote about little Kita having just met her at the salon. I guess I was just so taken by her. I felt a connection even though she’s only 21. Don’t worry dear reader I’m not after her. I just love her in the classic phicklephilly way. It’ll pass once she stops tanning here or goes home.

But something miraculous happened.

Kita came in to tan last Sunday. Of course I was delighted to see her sweet face. She looked lovely. White blouse, Little black shorts that showcased her lovely shapely legs and sandals. Cute as a button. My heart was aflutter. She says she’s not doing a spray tan today, and only wants UV. No problem. We discuss the different beds and she decides to give the Alpha another chance. I ask her if she ever uses a bronzer lotion. She says not normally but will try one. I give her Tahitian Bronze which is the best lotion in the house.

We chit-chat a bit more and then I send her into room 1.

When she comes out instead of leaving she starts chatting with me. It’s Sunday. She should be out doing what she does when she’s not going to school. Thankfully it’s dead this time of year and she and I sit in the waiting area.

I love this! (I get to see those lovely legs!)

She’s originally from Washington DC. She’s an adopted child and so is her sister, They’re not related and it happened when they were age 3. They are both Chinese. Her father and mother are both career Navy. Dad’s an Admiral that has sat with the former President Obama and has the pictures to prove it. This guy’s sounds like he’s the man.

Kita and her sister Jill attended The Madeira School, Washington, District Of Columbia. Kita loves to talk about herself and tell me her little stories about her life. I’m just happy to smile and listen because she’s so darn cute.

Madeira students and sisters Kita ’15 and Jill ’16 competed in the Savageman Triathlon, a fundraiser to fight melanoma with the motto “A savage race to fight a savage cancer.” The competition took place on September 14 and 15 at Deep Creek Lake, MD, and consisted of a 0.9 mile swim, 22.9 mile bike ride, and 6.2 mile run. In the photo she is standing with her older sister Jill and her dad who appears to be a Vice Admiral in the Navy. (Funny, she competed in a triatholon to fight melanoma but loves to go tanning!)

She also was on the Women’s Lacrosse team at Madeira High. She was also proficient at track and field. She ran the 100 meter in 13.84. That’s impressive.

Kita later did an internship at the Animal Welfare League of Arlington.

Kita spent her Co-Curriculum at the Animal Welfare League of Arlington doing research for events, clicker training dogs, and sitting in on animal adoption interviews. During her time there, Katy’s interest in the business component of the shelter grew and she was eager to learn more about the hiring process and personnel management. In learning how an animal control shelter runs, Kita said she had the opportunity to learn more about public service and employee work ethic.

Back then she was in high school and was a teenager with dark brown hair. Not the blonde, lean young woman she is today that stirs my loins.

She has more to tell me and wants to share about her current relationship. She’s been with JR since she was 17 and I’m sure he punched her V card.

There is nostalgic love there but there are problems. The relationship is ripping at the seams because they are growing apart and she needs advice. I will be that elder to help her on her journey is she’s willing.

I think she is and she’s spent over an hour here sitting with me and has moved from top five to number one in my book. I can’t wait to hear more about the romantic life of this lovely waif.

She bids me farewell to go workout. She works out everyday. Her body is proof. I am euphoric that this lovely lady has chosen to spend time with an old bull like me. Kita says she likes talking to people and learning new things. Kita is a ripe canvas that I think I can help navigate the dark waters of romance and relationships.

She left and I am still high from her beauty. I want to learn more about her and where she is in her life. She asks what shifts I work and says she will come in when I’m working. I love helping people so I am compelled to try to offer Kita my assistance I can in regard to matters of the heart.

She comes from a good family, but if there is any wisdom I can offer I will to help guide her forward. I know my intentions are always true but she is so beautiful I am drawn to her. It’ll go nowhere and she’ll go forward but if I can help her I will. I have my own love life to manage.

You have no idea, but I love you Kita, just like I loved Maria. (Maria – 2016 to Present – Amor En Vano)

I want to learn more about you!

Your legs are lovely!

Phicklephilly!

 

 

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Another Life – Chapter 12

Uncle Ray was really considerate. He and his girlfriend Karen offered me a place to stay. I truly appreciated their generosity. Their apartment wasn’t big enough for three, but they put me up while I looked for a place.

Real estate prices were nothing like they are now – but neither were wages. The problem was simple: I couldn’t afford a one-bedroom anywhere near the garage. But I didn’t want to give up the best job I’d ever had.

I was really surprised when my cousin’s girlfriend called me.

– “Hey dickweed.” she said.

– “Laurie?”

– “The one and only.” she said. “Listen, I heard through the grapevine that you’re looking for new digs.”

– “Wow.” I said. “Word travels fast.”

– “So it’s true?” said Laurie. “Hey – Ron and I are at the Lion.” That was a pub, not too far from the garage where I worked. “Can you meet us there? Like, now?”

I rode my bike, wondering if Laurie really did have a solution to my problem. She and Ron were already there. I’d always liked the Lion. It was typical English pub: dark wood, a great selection of beers on tap, dartboards, and a collection of eccentric regulars.

– “Good timing.” said Ron. We were about to go have a look.”

– “A look? At what?”

– “At the apartment we’re thinking of renting.” said Laurie. “Ronnie and me, plus Rose – but it’s a four-bedroom. Split the rent four ways instead of three, and it’s a bargain.”

– “You’re kidding me.” I said. I had met Laurie’s friend: Rose was a big girl, but nice. If this was possible, it could solve my immediate problem.

I didn’t even order a pint. Ronnie and Laurie drained theirs, and we walked around the corner – two blocks away.

It was a massive old house – the ground floor was now a lawyer’s office. The second floor was for rent. There was a door on the side, which led to a set of stairs, completely separate from the first-floor office.

The landlord was waiting, and took us in. The house was old, but it did have some character. The stairs led into a good-sized kitchen, with a sloping ceiling. There were two bedrooms at the back of the house, with a small bathroom between them.

The main bathroom was on the other side of the kitchen, opposite another bedroom. The last bedroom was a bit bigger, and there was a living room, with a small balcony, overlooking the street.

I had never looked at a place with a mind to renting it before, but Laurie was no fool. She quizzed the landlord about utilities, noise during the day, parking, and a whole bunch of other stuff.

The landlord informed us that no pets were allowed.

– “He’s not a pet.” said Ronnie. “He’s my cousin.”

I was more concerned about how clean it was, and the water pressure in the shower (excellent). On top of that, I was trying to picture how four people could live together, without driving each other nuts.

Ronnie asked the most important question. “How much?”

The price was ridiculous – for one person. Split four ways, it was incredibly cheap. We excused ourselves, and went to talk it over.

– “Whaddya think, Joe?” said Laurie. “Could you handle living with us? And Rose?”

– “Could you guys live with me?”

I was already sold. It was two blocks from the Lion, and exactly six blocks, in the opposite direction, from Uncle Ray’s garage. I had to get out of my house – and here was a heaven-sent solution.

“Thank you, Laurie. Thanks, Ron. This looks great. Count me in.”

 

https://lapetitemort17.wordpress.com/?p=393

 

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Chloe – Awkward Coffee Date

So I met a girl on OK Cupid a while back, let’s call her Chloe. Nice lady. Not the most attractive woman in the world, but enough for a date. I message her a bit online, we trade Facebooks and have some pretty intriguing conversations about psychedelics and the human psyche. Our thoughts and our dreams and other cool stuff. I think, wow she’s a deep thinker like me, I bet we are really gonna click!

I ask her out to get some coffee that week so I can bail just in case it gets bad, but fully expect it to go well based on our conversations. Oh my naive heart.

I arrive at the coffee place where we agreed to meet and I take a look in the window. Don’t see her in there. I look around a bit, no doubt coming off as a lost idiot until I notice a girl leaning against the building next door.  There was an overhang so it was darkened (this is like 6pm at night because I work full-time 9-5 mind you) and she steps forward and I recognize it as her.

Red flag number 1. But I shrug it off. Okay it was just a little weird. Nothing too bad. We get in line and I try to strike up casual conversation. She responds kindly, but with as little effort as possible it seems and in very awkward utterances.

We sit down with our drinks and I redouble my efforts, touching on things that sparked conversation before, but it’s almost like she’s a different person as she seems completely apathetic to the entire situation regardless of what I said.

I ask her if there’s something wrong, and she apologizes saying that she smoked a little weed before coming over and was more high than she was expecting to be.

As I continue to try to salvage any conversation at all, I come to realize that she is completely fucking blitzed out of her mind.

Like sink into a couch and not speak for 3 hours blitzed. On a first date. Needless to say, I was very eager to get out of there, and luckily the coffee shop closed at 7.

We said our goodbyes and parted ways. When I got home I had a message from her talking about how she would be starting to sell shrooms soon after getting a connect from her ex-bf in a very not so passive attempt to push on me. Haven’t talked to her since. Fuck. That. Noise.

 

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Cherie – Chapter 47 – Pay It Forward – Part 2

After our first amazing sex session, she usually dozes off. I am just the opposite. I feel energized and a bit euphoric. I tell her I’m going to go downstairs and try doing the laundry again. It’s probably 10pm by now.

I grab the bag and head down. The dryer is empty but there is a finished load of wet towels in the washer. Damn it! Did one of my neighbors throw in a load of towels and fall asleep? I could be a dick and just pull out the wet towels and place them on top of the dryer and just play through with my laundry. I do just that, but have an idea.

I put my stuff in the washer, add detergent, and load the $1.75 in quarters into the vending mechanism and hit the start button.

I go back upstairs and get some more quarters, a piece of paper and a pen. I try to collect as many quarters as possible on a regular basis because my daughter is always stealing them and doing her laundry on a weekly basis. I don’t mind!

I go back downstairs. I load the pile of wet towels into the dryer. I have just enough quarters to do their load and then do mine. After that I’m out of quarters. I pay for their dryer time and push start. I go back upstairs and sit quietly at my desk and do some writing while my girlfriend peacefully sleeps.

Forty minutes later I go back downstairs. My was is done and I check on my neighbor’s towels. They’re dry!

I fold all of their towels and stack them neatly on top of the washer. I then compose the following note:

Hello Neighbor,

I really needed to do my laundry tonight. I couldn’t wait any longer, so I paid it forward and did yours too! – (My initials)

I tossed my laundry into the dryer and paid for it with my last seven quarters.

I went back upstairs and felt really good about myself. I just thought of a great way to really do something nice for someone for under two dollars! Try to think of way you could do something that thoughtful for someone for under two dollars! I can’t think of anything. If you can, let me know in the comments section.

An hour later I go back downstairs and my laundry is finished! I bag it up and head upstairs. My neighbor’s towels are still stacked on the dryer along with my note. Mission accomplished!

I drop the bag on the floor of my bedroom and slink beneath the sheets beside my love, and fall asleep after my busy day.

The next morning we wake up pretty early. Actually Cherie woke up before I did and instead of my alarm, she awakened me with her mouth. What a glorious way to start a Sunday!

We don’t have to get up yet, so we decide to get it on. I love morning sex, because you’ve had some rest and can really get going.

“Do you want me to wear a condom?”

“Do you want to have sex with me?”

“Yes.”

Cherie: (Gives me the look)

Me: (Immediately suits up)

It’s wonderful and hot has always. Cherie is an orgasmic machine. I like this new condom rule. I feel completely safe and so does she. It actually turns me on more that I’m going to blast away inside her like I’m supposed to without any pesky new humans showing up in nine months that I have to raise.

 

We shower and head out to breakfast. Her Saab is parked down at 19th and Bainbridge so I decide to take her to Honey’s Sit n’ Eat down at 21st and South st. It’s a little rustic breakfast and lunch spot that serves really good home style meals. They accept cash only. Usually this place is slammed on the weekends but it’s early and we get seats at the counter. Which is good because we’re near the back and it’s much quieter.

Staff was on point, food was delicious and there were no issues. The place is a little pricey but Cherie never asks for anything and I’m delighted to take her our to a really hearty breakfast.

Here’s the coolest, most amazing part of the meal. (Other than my beautiful baby) When I walked in music was quietly playing in the background. I like when they play the music at a low volume. I don’t like a noisy restaurant and don’t want to have to shout during my meal. Highway Star was playing by Deep Purple. I like that, but every song after that is from Black Sabbath’s second album Paranoid. Then they started playing songs from their third LP, Master of Reality. I’ve never been in a restaurant or a bar in my life, (and I’ve been in plenty!) that played that much classic metal by a single artist non stop. It was glorious. Because it was played at low volume it was if it was all for me as a bonus. I didn’t know I could be more happy than after a night and morning with Cherie, but that did it.

Cherie said she was sufficiently stuffed. (poor thing, 3rd time in 24 hrs!)  I only had a breakfast sadwich so I was

Cherie: “I’m stuffed.”

Me: “Aww poor thing. Feeling stuffed three times in 12 hours!”

Cherie: (Gives me a wry smile)

I happily pay the bill, and out we go. We get to her Saab and she drives me to the salon.

“When you get home text me so I know you’re safe, dear. Thank you so much for coming down to see me. It was wonderful! I love you, Cherie.”

“I love you more.”

 

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Murder Mystery Weekend – Chapter 13

“Wonderful!” said Teresa. “Let’s get started.”

We all made space, and ceded the centre stage to her.

“We are playing fast and loose with history here. Imagine a time when women could be pirates, and just as bloodthirsty and ferocious as the men – if not more.” That got a hoot of agreement from the ladies, and when Sheila chimed in with a deep-voiced ‘Aaargh!’, everyone laughed.

“You can all use your real names as an alias.” continued Teresa. “Everyone here has a secret identity. One of your tasks is to find out everyone else’s secrets, without giving away all of your own. Everyone here is in disguise. That might explain why you will not recognize former shipmates, or even old friends. Later on, there will be a murder, and you will try to discover the identity of the killer among you. Finally, there is that rumour about a treasure …”

“Last rule. Everyone must return their character instruction sheets to me. I will keep them safe, and you can return at any time to consult your own instructions. You may also, if you wish, write down any piece of information on those sheets – but you can’t keep the originals.”

“The reason for that is very simple: you could easily prove to someone that you’re telling the truth, just by showing them your secret instructions. This way, you will have to convince them, without any paper to back you up. No one, except me, of course, will ever know if you are truly trustworthy …”

I saw heads nodding around the room. There were gamers among us, who certainly appreciated Teresa’s little ploy.

“Then … we are ready to begin.”

– “Wait.” said Ben. “Who’s been murdered?”

– “No one.” said Teresa. “Yet …”

She gave us one hour to circulate, and to talk to other players, while dinner was being prepared. Leo and I got barbecue duty. We were going to cook up shish kebabs, cubes of beef or chicken on skewers, with green and red peppers, onions, zucchini and so on. By some sort of unspoken agreement, neither of us mentioned our characters, or the mystery roles. There were too many people hovering around.

– “I’ve got this.” said Leo. “Go talk to people. Or get me another beer. Or both.”

I took the hint, and moved away. Ben was standing by myself, so I approached him. He was the person I least wanted to talk, so I decided to get it over with early.

– “Great costume.” I told him.

– “Thanks. You look alright, too.”

– “What do you think, so far?” I asked him.

– “Are you kidding? Did you see Barb? Or Claire? Shit, all of them look incredible.”

– “I hear you. Lena, too. She makes me wish I was six foot four.”

– “In your dreams.” he laughed. I was barely 5’10”.

Then he transferred his beer to his left hand, and raised his right hand to scratch his ear. Ben looked right at me, and touched three fingers to his ear lobe. It was the recognition signal for Redbeard’s crew. For a moment, I considered replying in kind. Instead, I played dumb.

Ben narrowed his eyes and looked at me suspiciously. I’m not sure if I passed his scrutiny, but he gave it up and changed the subject.

I moved off, and settled next to Eric, who was cradling a rum punch while he looked out over the lake. I guess the beard was itching him, or maybe interfering with his drinking: he had pulled it down so that it circled his neck.

– “You look like an Amish pirate.” I said.

– “An improvement, then? Never mind. I gladly accept your compliment.” he answered.

– “Is that you speaking, or your character?” I asked.

– “Why can’t it be both?”

Just for the hell of it, I used the recognition signal that Ben had tried out on me. Eric didn’t even flinch.

– “You’re not a pirate, are you?” I asked.

– “Depends.” he said. “Are you the Falcon?”

Interesting. That was one name I had to fear. “No. I have to watch out for him, too. Or her.”

– “So you’re the one called the Scar?” Eric asked me.

– “Nope. Not me either.”

– “Cool nicknames, though.” he said. “I’m glad you invited me. This could be a lot of fun. So then you’re here to rescue Redbeard?”

I shook my head. “No. Far as I’m concerned, he can stay right where he is.”

– “Really?” said Eric. “And you’re not the Falcon?”

– “Said I wasn’t.”

 

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Cherie – Chapter 46 – Pay It Forward – Part 1

After having my first Saturday off in a while and spending some time chatting with Summer and her boyfriend over at the salon, it was time to prepare.

The afternoon was humid. I wanted to have some food in my stomach so I stopped in at Lazaro’s Pizza down at 18th and South. It’s just a few blocks from my house. They have huge thin crusted NY style slices. One slice and a can of soda is enough for me. Lately I’ve noticed in the last few months, I’ve needed less and less food to sustain myself. Not losing weight or anything, just going with smaller portions. I normally am happy with half of whatever is the usual serving is in most restaurants. As American’s we eat entirely too much food.

I have a theory about this. I’m at a point where I have never been happier and more at peace. Ex-wife long gone from my life. Currently not chained to a shitty rat race job that I hate. Daughter Lorelei is doing well. Good girlfriend, and I’m just living a happy simple life.

I have found lately that people who obsess over food and over eat, are just stuffing their feelings. The food gives them that little tiny dopamine drop that makes them feel good, because the rest of their life is pretty much a stressful, empty mess.

I don’t know, but if you can live a simple uncluttered life, you’ll feel better and won’t need as much. A little bit will satisfy you. You don’t have to kill your demons. Just keep them on a short leash.

Writing this story has taught me so much. If you want to have a good life, you’ve just got to go there and live it. Get out of your own way and just go do what you want to do. The only thing holding back is you.

I’m starting to see a pattern with some of the people in my life. The reckless spending. The paralysis. The obsessive behaviors. Somewhere in among all of that is a deep-rooted unhappiness and dissatisfaction with life in general. There are people who should have moved forward with their lives years ago and they are still mired in the life they do not want.

But you know what?

They are right where they’re supposed to be because they never did anything to change and evolve.

I finish my slice and head across the street to Walgreens. Years ago that was an empty lot and the area was a little sketchy at night. but no more. This area (Graduate Hospital) has improved so much in the last few years it looks like a whole different neighborhood.

I pick up some much-needed things for the house and some assorted surprise juices that I’ll hide in the fridge for Lorelei. (She loves juice!) I head back to the house and clean up the place a bit. The usual stuff: change the sheets, mop the floor, fabreze everything. Then hit the bathroom hard with some bleach and cleanser. I’ve got some time so I grab a handful of quarters and all my dirty laundry and head to the basement to do a load. Who could possibly be doing laundry at 5pm on a Saturday?

Of course there is a load going in both the washer and dryer. This puts a wrench in the works. I go back upstairs and drop the bag. I grab some clean sheets from the closet and make the bed. I would have preferred the royal blue ones for baby but these tan ones will have to do. I know Cherie doesn’t care but I haven’t seen her in a couple of weeks. I know it’s a pain to get down here with everything going on her life and the sheer logistics of the mission. I just want things to be nice for her when she gets here. She says my house is the only place where she can truly relax even if it’s a short time.

I’m pissed I can’t get my laundry done, but I get the place looking presentable in the meantime. The air is on, my room is nice and cool and smells great. I light some candles, and put on some chill tunes on Pandora.

Cherie arrives and we relax and exchange stories. She looks beautiful. Black top with a short skirt and matching flats. Sometimes she’s so spent when she gets here she just needs to lie down on the bed and chit-chat. Other times she wants things to move forward a little faster.  I like talking with her instead of attacking her. I genuinely miss her and am happy to see her and catch up as a couple. I figure we have all night.

That time comes and the fun begins. She’s pleased with the initial results that I am able to draw forth from her like a bee to a flower. She pushes me away because she has reached critical mass in regard to her flower. I roll onto my back and she says, “Where do you want me?” She’s ready for the big moment.

“I think I’d like you to hop up here, cowgirl.”

“Okay.”

But then she stopped. “Can you wear a condom?”

I didn’t react. I simply grabbed one from the night table, tore open the package and suited up. Cherie mounted me and we were off to outer space.

She later told me her last two periods have been late, and that has really stressed her out. I didn’t even question it when she made request, because sexually I will always obey what the woman wants. She faces all of the risk. Cherie does not want any more children and of course neither do I. Normally I have great control and always pull out. But I will say this, I know how we men feel about condoms. You can’t feel anything, etc. I get it. But the great thing about wearing a condom is you can finish properly like sex was intended.

I’ve tried quite a few different brands, but at the moment I recommend, Trojan Supre. Really good. Thin and you definitely feel it.

(To be continued tomorrow…)

 

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