Cherie – Chapter 34 – It’s All About The Journey – Part 2

“Cherie has come along and pulled me from a cold black river named Annabelle.”

I’ve never given up. I never will. I’ve been driven by my heart and passion my entire life, but those powers forever remain if your heart is open. I’ve always believed this. “Be true to thyself” my dad always said. I know he read that somewhere, but it’s a solid piece of advice.

I now know real love is achievable at this point in my life. It’s not the prettiest girl you can close, or the youngest girl, or anything like that. You can find it in a stranger and connect with her in a way that’s beyond the traditional structures you’ve been taught. Love is all around you.

Just keep going.

Learn from your mistakes. Be a better and more patient man. Mind your manners and always be giving and romantic. That never gets old.

She’s out there for you and I hope everyone reading this finds their him or her.

I’d love to hold onto this lady forever.

My Mother once said, ‘you never know, life is a dice roll’. She was probably talking about her marriage with my dad but that is a blog post for later.

But for now I will bask in the sunlight of this lovely relationship. She really seems perfect for me, but you never know. This is a dating blog. I started this journey dating women and striking out. Babe Ruth struck out all the time. But we know that story. Michael Jordan practiced non stop and did free throws and struggled for years.

But he kept at it.

Don’t give up. Keep your heart open. Too many people close their eyes and heart and become bitter.  Stay positive. Keep loving the little things in life your health and your family and all of the good things in your life.

An open heart is a new day. Every day is a new opportunity to meet someone. Don’t obsess about it.

If you meet someone be cautious but real.

“We always want that which retreats from us.” – The Tao of Steve

You can do it.

I could go down in flames in the next year and this could be over. I’ll have lost again for the fourth time in a row!

But you have to evolve and put yourself out there because you never know. Swipe right, be cautious and have fun. Don’t push to hard. You’ll know when you meet a good one.

The universe will unfold as it should for us all.

Don’t be bitter on your past relationships and don’t carry that crap around with you. Clear your mind. If you don’t it’s just you drinking the poison hoping the other person dies.

And that is a waste of time.

The cage you’re in right now is of your own making. Drop the bars and walk the fuck out and go meet somebody. It can be done. I’m living proof of that.

There are so many people out there that would LOVE to meet you. You’re not great, you’re just human. We are a social species, so go out there and make it happen.

Cherie has come along and pulled me from the cold black river named Annabelle.

(See: Annabelle – Guy walks into a bar – 2013 to 2014)

Falling in real love is like being in a raging sea and washing up on a warm sunny beach with a drink in your hand and a lovely girl next to you. She always assures you she loves you more than you love her. No one ever reveals that. Most don’t know where they stand in a relationship, but she does. She’s happy in her role. you can’t believe your fortune or the reveal. You have the power to squander or embrace.

You go in for the sweet hug.

I’d love to go on more about this but I have to go bang my girlfriend back to the Stone Age.

I’m so glad I installed air bags in the headboard of my bed.

 

Love you all for still following and not turning the hose on us.

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12 pm EST.

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Dating and Relationship Advice: 10 Sexy-Smart Things Men Do That Totally Turns Women On

I was having a drink with my friend Rebecca last Sunday, and we were talking about life, relationships, and dating. (See: Rebecca: Dark Wings of Destiny) She was really interested in the dating advice part of the blog, as many of you are, and I gave her an assignment.

What do women want?

Here’s what she came up with. So take it away Rebecca!

Men, take note:  These things are WAY hotter than being fit.

For me, the sexiest thing a man can have is a good head on his shoulders. You don’t need to woo me with rock-hard biceps or a strong core … you just need to be able to talk to me, baby.

In other words: Intelligence wins over any looks you can throw at me. I get totally weak in the knees over a man who is able to keep a great conversation with me, keep me interested, help me learn. I find a smart man to be the sexiest of all.

 

Here are ten sexy-smart things that men do that totally make us swoon, Every. Single. Time.

1.  Have a deep, passionate interest in something.

I don’t care whether this interest is even something that I share. I don’t give a hoot about cars but one of my male friends is crazy about them, and he stares at cars in the street like many men do with hot women. And I totally love it. I love that he has a deep passion and interest for something and that he rattles off car facts not to impress anyone, but because he’s genuinely interested. And it’s super sexy!

2.  Read — of your own accord!

If a man has a veracious appetite for books, it’s an immediate turn-on. It means that he wants to get lost in a good story, or learn something. He wants to feed his brain. And that kind of investment is better than any time in the gym.

3.  Use a rich (but not pretentious) vocabulary.

If a man uses the perfect word in the perfect context, I’m immediately weak in the knees. But it has to be genuine: if you’re throwing around big, pretentious words just to make people think you’re smart, we can tell — and the effect is the opposite (and it’s not sexy).

4.  Have an opinion on worldly issues.

I don’t mean that you must have a defined stance on every single war and foreign relations issue in the entire world, but knowing what’s going on beyond your city reflects a concern for and genuine interest about lives outside of your own.

5.  Know what your dreams are … and chase after them.

I once dated a guy who wanted to act. And he was incredibly talented! But he never made any real steps towards realizing it and he ended up in some humdrum job he totally hates. Have dreams, no matter how big, and go after them — that determination gets us going more than you can imagine.

6.  Talk to me for hours about any topic under the sun.

Meeting a hot guy is great but when he only knows about lifting or football and can’t keep up a conversation about pretty much anything else, I’m going to get bored real quick. Being able to talk about anything — and also, in the same vein, not being afraid to say, “I don’t know — tell me what you know about that” — is intensely attractive.

7.  Have not only book-smart intelligence, but emotional intelligence.

Intelligence is great, but you need to be able to get in touch with your emotions. You need to know that as a human, you will feel emotions that you don’t understand, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re correct — and you need to be willing to explore those emotions. A man with emotional intelligence is a man who is emotionally available.

8.  Have your shit together.

Life is confusing and tricky, but if you have the basics together: you do your taxes, you’ve got a car that functions, it shows self-reliance and maturity.

9.  Have personal taste.

Whether this is in music, wine, or something else entirely, having personal taste shows you don’t just blindly follow what other people follow. A developed palette shows interest, passion, and autonomy.

10.  Teach me something new every day — even without even meaning to.

I’m a reader and a writer. I’m hungry for more knowledge, constantly. I want you to be able to open my eyes even further, to teach me something new, just because that’s who you are.

 

If you’ve got these things under your belt, you’ve got her, hook, line, and sinker.

 

Thanks Rebecca!

 

Was this helpful? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this subject!

 

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Cherie – Chapter 33 – It’s All About The Journey – Part 1

“Despite the appearance of Ambria, I’m able to compartmentalize my relationships.”

The blog really is action packed this week! So strap in. It’s going to get crazy good! Thanks for reading!!!

It’s been over 3 weeks since I’ve seen Cherie. When I last saw her she rolled into town on the train around 11:30 in the morning. Normally she can get into the city at dusk on a Saturday, but that day her parents took her son and some of the cousins to something for the afternoon, so she was able to slip away for the afternoon to see me.

She’s been super busy with finals at Temple and her job at CHOP. (Children’s Hospital) It’s been a hectic time for her. She gets her Bachelor’s of Science in neuroscience and her Bachelor of Arts in Psychology soon.

Unlike all the Temple girls that come into the salon to tan, when they finish finals this week, they’ll all be off for the summer, or get a summer job. Cherie will be taking courses all summer because she wants to graduate early and get it over with.

So I asked her if after next year when she’s finished school if she’ll have more free time. Cherie said after she graduates next year, she’ll have to start medical school for like 4 years and then more medical school with a residency at the hospital.

I think this is how my life is going to be for a while. But here’s the thing… If you’ve been reading this blog for a while you’ll know my last few relationships didn’t work out. But I love having a girlfriend that adores me that isn’t around all the time.  She’s not needy, she’s not clingy, she’s also just not present most of the time.

And I love that! I mean… a little more time with her would be nice, but this is like the perfect relationship for me. A young, hot girl who knows what she wants and is going after it. She’s working hard all the while raising her son, and doesn’t want anymore kids!

It’s like the perfect girlfriend has been created for me. I like my alone time. I like my social life with all of my friends. I don’t give a shit about being showy on social media. I don’t even care about Facebook or Instagram anymore. I only post stuff on the phicklephilly Instagram and it automatically throws it to the Facebook page for phicklephilly. (Also, Twitter, Tumbler and Linkedin) Cherie doesn’t do Instagram, but has a facebook page she never goes on. I no longer care what the world is eating and drinking or doing with their kids on social media anymore. There aren’t even any photos of Cherie and me together. Because when we’re together it’s all about us. We’re sharing a meal together, or going to the movies or doing whatever, we don’t have the need to document it, and share it with the world. We’re awesome together and that belongs to us, and only us. If we shared us it would probably be too much for the world to handle.

Do I miss her? Sure I do, I miss her a lot. She’s beautiful and funny and sexy as hell. I miss worshipping at the “Temple of Cherie” with my mighty Scepter of Virility. (Lol!) She’s a great, chill girl who is so agreeable and easy-going.

I’m sure she misses me too. We normally don’t let a day go by without at least one text being exchanged. I normally don’t like a girl who needs to contact me everyday. It’s annoying. But with Cherie I’m always happy to hear from baby. If she’s missing me I just hope she isn’t hurting about it. I’m pretty sure she accepts that this is her life and this is just how it is now.

 

I like having my free time alone and look forward to our time together. When she arrived on Saturday I was at Suburban Station waiting for her like always. I’m always so happy to see her. She always takes my lead, and I’m not a big PDA (public display of affection) person, but lately when I see her I’m so glad she is before me, I hug and kiss her. (Not make out, but a hug and a peck on the cheek)

We’ve basically got from noon until 5:10, then I need to have her back on a train back to her life in Pottstown, PA.

She always tells me that when she’s with me it’s like a mini vacation from her hectic, hard-working life. We had once spoke that how nice it would be to just spend an afternoon in bed together. Just a block of time to relax and do nothing.

And everything.

When your time is this limited with a loved one, you will seize the absolute core of what satisfies you both equally.

I’m happy just sit across from baby at a diner and eat breakfast or hang at our favorite pizza or wings place. (Again, she doesn’t want anything from me, ever)

But if we are so driven together by our love that if our time is so limited to only hours, we will celebrate in an explosion of sexual desire.

As I write this she’s studying for finals that will end Monday, but she’ll go to summer school to propel herself forward in this life. I spoke with a heart doctor I know who comes to the salon and she said it is a long road ahead for Cherie.

But this afternoon is ours. A brief repose from our hectic lives. We come together. We disappear for a few hours. Wishes fulfilled. School gone. No children, studies, or following doctors around, no bills or responsibilities. No salon, people, friends, clients, alcohol or cigarettes. No trying to figure out which lawyer is best to set up the partnership agreement for my new business.

Nothing.

Just two people who have come together and love each other for different reasons, but are in firm agreeance that we accept the terms of that lifestyle because it runs like a swiss watch.

Four hours with my beloved. We grind each other to powder in a searing session that feels Olympian to this old lion. But he loves her dearly. She loves him more. All is given. Physical vessels are taken to the furthest they can withstand with great joy and rapture.

Tune in tomorrow for the conclusion!

 

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Run so fast, fly so high!! — Sensuality, Sex & Something else

Well…not really run so fast..actually not even running at all because I don’t run but I did get to fly…really high….No no, not talking about drugs or shit like that, I mean FLYING…I really did fly!! Ha ha!! I flew a plane and it was absolutely freaking amazing!! So this blog is a little out of […]

via Run so fast, fly so high!! — Sensuality, Sex & Something else

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish Monday through Friday at 8am & 12pm EST.

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Dating and Relationship Advice: Why You Should Give Up Online Dating In 2018

Online dating has turned people into numbers and it can suck the fun out of the process of dating if you let it.

Online dating has become everyone’s go-to when it comes to meeting romantic prospects. We program our entire lives via apps—from health and wellness to money management, so it’d make sense that our dating lives are also manipulated by the results generated by apps. For me, I found that a bit too contrived and problematic.

You want to meet them right away because things feel easy and there’s magic behind the comfort of your phone screen. Then once you’re sitting across from each other, you find out that there’s no magic at all.

For one, the bulk of dating apps don’t take into consideration where others are in their lives. When you put together your profile, you’re stating your intentions and your desires. “I’m looking for…” And based on what people aimlessly check off on their profile, you’re matched up. Except most people leave profiles open-ended to cast a wide net. Depending on the app or site you’re using, you’re going to have to do a lot of sifting through before you find any good candidates. In most cases, the best candidates are going to be selected based on criteria that make sense on paper. However, physically or intellectually, the matches wouldn’t be people you’d pick in real life.

Online dating isn’t always that extreme although it operates under a level of immediacy that can feel overwhelming. You want to meet them right away because things feel easy and there’s magic behind the comfort of your phone screen. Then once you’re sitting across from each other, you find out that there’s no magic at all. It’s a letdown. On the other side, you can be pleasantly surprised by someone that didn’t wow you exchanging messages. After a few dates, though, things fizzle out. You’re back to square one without as much as an explanation other than assuming that they’re just busy.

If a healthy relationship is near the top of your list for 2018, I’d suggest looking into your social circles.

The biggest reason why I think people should give up the vicious cycle of dating online is because there are better, more reliable ways to meet people. Depending on apps and social media can get exhausting. For the most part, you’re living in your head so much. There’s very little open communication because we’ve gotten used to moving on to the next thing. There are tons of options at our disposal. The risk of any type of accountability or investment is low. Online dating has turned people into numbers and it can suck the fun out of the process of dating if you let it.

If a healthy relationship is near the top of your list for 2018, I’d suggest looking into your social circles. Look at the places where you spend the bulk of your time. This year, I met a few great women through friends of mine and at church. My friends were invested in trying to fix me up (sometimes a little too invested) and knew enough about me that they picked good women for me. The people you trust likely are on your side and want to see your happy ending as much as you want to have it.

I’d also advise that you sit down and be honest with yourself about what is it that you want. Oftentimes we say we want a serious relationship when what we really want is companionship. Those two aren’t the same things. You can have one and not the other and that’s OK. But it’s important to not conflate them and to find someone who’s on the same page.

Dating is supposed to be enjoyable. Online dating apps have their place. That shouldn’t be your sole source for romantic quests though. If you’ve had more failures with it, I challenge you to get back to the basics of meeting people the way our parents and grandparents did it. Be bold and actually say hello to real, live people once in awhile.

 

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Tales of Rock – The 10 Wildest Led Zeppelin Legends, Fact-Checked

The Old Hermit in the ‘Led Zeppelin IV’ Gatefold Is a Character From ‘The Lord of the Rings’

THE BACKSTORY: It’s no secret that Led Zeppelin loved The Lord of the Rings. They even sing about “Mordor” and “Gollum” in 1969’s “Ramble On.” So when a mysterious cloaked figure with a lantern who seemed to be straight out of Middle-Earth appeared on the inside cover of their fourth album, many fans assumed it was a figure from J.R.R. Tolkien’s books.

THE TRUTH: “The hermit” was merely inspired by a figure from a Tarot card. Page played the role of the Hermit during a fantasy sequence in Zeppelin’s 1976 movie, The Song Remains the Same.

Led Zeppelin

Hulton Archive/Getty Images

 

The Title of ‘D’yer Mak’er’ Is Based on an Old Cockney Joke About Jamaica

THE BACKSTORY: Many fans think the title of this Houses of the Holy tune is pronounced
“Dire Maker”; in fact, you’re supposed to say it more like the name of the Caribbean country.

THE TRUTH: Plant has confirmed that the title “D’yer Mak’er” does, in fact, come from a rusty bit of Cockney humor, which usually goes something like this:
Cockney Man 1: My wife is going on holiday.
Cockney Man 2: D’yer make ‘er? [“Jamaica,” but pronounced quickly so that it sounds just like “Did you make her?”]
Cockney Man 1: No, she’s going on her own accord. 
The sly allusion to Jamaica made sense for the song: “D’yer Mak’er” is Zeppelin’s reggae move.

Led Zeppelin

Atlantic Records

The Title of Zeppelin’s Fourth Album Is ‘Zoso’

THE BACKSTORY: Their first three albums had simple, sensible titles: Led ZeppelinIIIII.
When it came time for number four, in November 1971, they stripped things down even further, refusing to print a single word anywhere on the record sleeve, not even their own names, apparently in hopes of causing confusion among the hated rock press. “After all we had accomplished, the press was still calling us a hype,” Page said. “So that is why the fourth album was untitled.” Naturally, this created some confusion – and it infuriated Atlantic Records. The band did include four symbols on the cover, one that represented each group member. Page’s symbol seemed to spell out “Zoso.”

THE TRUTH: Page insists the symbols aren’t even letters, although that hasn’t stopped people from referring to the album as Zoso (or Zeppelin IV). Technically the album is untitled.

Randy Olson/National Geographic/Getty Images

Led Zeppelin Once Defiled a Groupie With a Mud Shark

THE BACKSTORY: The most notorious of all Zeppelin legends began when the band played the Seattle Pop Festival on July 27th, 1969, then retired to the Edgewater Inn. The building sits atop Seattle’s Puget Sound; guests can actually fish directly from their windows. The 1985 Led Zeppelin biography Hammer of the Gods – which got much of its information from Zep road manager Richard Cole – describes a graphic scene in one of the rooms. “A pretty young groupie with red hair was disrobed and tied to the bed,” wrote author Stephen Davis. “Led Zeppelin then proceeded to stuff pieces of shark into her vagina and rectum.”

THE TRUTH: This one’s fishy. A different version of the mud-shark incident has Cole as the fish-wielding culprit; the band Vanilla Fudge have also claimed responsibility for the incident. Their drummer, Carmine Appice, says the girl in question was a groupie who’d tagged along with him, and his keyboardist Mark Stein filmed the entire encounter. Zeppelin were supposedly in the hotel at the time, though only John Bonham was around for the incident. Somewhere out there is a sixtysomething woman who might be able to confirm the whole thing, but it’s hard to imagine her coming forward.

Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images

Jimmy Page Dated a 14-year-old Girl While He Was in Led Zeppelin

THE BACKSTORY: Lori Maddox was a part of the Los Angeles groupie scene beginning in the early 1970s. According to Maddox, Page became infatuated with her and had a roadie bring Maddox up to his suite at the L.A. Hyatt House. “[He was] wearing this hat over his eyes and holding a cane,” she remembered. “He looked just like a gangster. It was magnificent.” The pair went on to have a torrid affair over the next few years. (Cutie!)

THE TRUTH: Maddox was, amazingly, just 14 when she met Page, though Page did what he could to keep the relationship hidden. Even in the swingin’ Seventies this kind of thing could put you in jail. But with no TMZ or Us Weekly, Page got away with it. He eventually dumped Maddox for the of-legal-age Bebe Buell.

 

jimmy page

Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images

Jimmy Page Worshipped the Devil

THE BACKSTORY: Page’s obsession with Aleister Crowley led to whispers that he and Satan were tight; yet another rumor claimed that the members of Led Zeppelin had made a Faustian bargain in exchange for stardom.

THE TRUTH: There’s no evidence Page was a Satanist, though he believed in Crowley’s philosophy of personal liberation. (He even had Crowley’s dictum “Do what thou wilt” inscribed in the run-off groove of the original vinyl releases of Led Zeppelin III.) Page did little to deflect the rumors throughout Zeppelin’s history, perhaps sensing they were good for business. “I don’t really want to go on about my personal beliefs or my involvement in magic,” he told Rolling Stone. “I’m not interested in turning
anybody on to anybody that I’m turned on to. If people want to find things, they find them themselves.”

 

John Bonham

Jorgen Angel/Redferns

John Bonham Drank 40 Shots of Vodka the Night He Died

THE BACKSTORY: Bonham was found dead on the morning of September 25th, 1980, at Page’s house in Windsor Berkshire, after a day of drinking and rehearsing.

THE TRUTH: According to the coroner’s report, the drummer had the equivalent of 40 vodka shots in his system. Bonham had been drinking quadruple vodkas earlier in the day and was so inebriated he failed to wake up when his body began ejecting the alcohol.

 

kieth moon

Chris Morphet/Redferns

Keith Moon of the Who Gave Led Zeppelin Their Name

THE BACKSTORY: In May 1966, Moon and Who bassist John Entwistle recorded the instrumental “Beck’s Bolero” with Page, John Paul Jones and Jeff Beck. The track came out well, and they tossed around the idea of forming a new band. Moon allegedly said the band would go over like a lead balloon. Page remembered the joke two years later when he created Zep.

THE TRUTH: Accounts differ; for decades Entwistle claimed it was he, not Moon, who made the “lead balloon” crack. But history seems to favor Moon’s version.

 

Jimmy Page

Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images

Jimmy Page Once Owned Aleister Crowley’s Former Home

THE BACKSTORY: Crowley was a British philosopher and occultist who dabbled in black magic in the early 20th century. Page was obsessed with him, amassing a huge collection of memorabilia.

THE TRUTH: Page did, in fact, purchase Crowley’s former home in Loch Ness, Scotland, in 1971 and later claimed it was haunted – but not necessarily because of Crowley. “There were two or three owners before Crowley moved into it,” Page told Rolling Stone in 1975. “It was also a church that was burned to the ground with the congregation in it. Strange things have happened in that house that had nothing to do with Crowley. The bad vibes were already there. A man was beheaded there, and sometimes you can hear his head rolling down.”

 

Led Zeppelin

Atlantic Records

If You Play ‘Stairway to Heaven’ in Reverse, You Hear Satanic Messages

THE BACKSTORY: Televangelist Paul Crouch brought this allegation into the mainstream in 1982, claiming that, when played backward, the “bustle in your hedgerow” segment of Zep’s signature tune says this: “Here’s to my sweet Satan/The one whose little path would make me sad, whose power is Satan/He will give those with him 666/There was a little toolshed where he made us suffer, sad Satan.”

THE TRUTH: That part of “Stairway” does sound similar to Crouch’s interpretation when played backward, but it’s just a bizarre coincidence. “Who on Earth would have ever thought of doing that?” Robert Plant said of the backward-Satanism charges. “You’ve got to have a lot of time on your hands to even consider that people would do that.”

 

 

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Dating and Relationship Advice: There Are 4 Good Reasons to Leave a Relationship — And 1 Really Bad One

Breaking up is the worst.

And not just because it makes you sad and regretful once you do it, but because deciding whether to part ways in the first place takes so much mental and emotional energy.

So here’s a framework that can help make the decision a little easier. It’s based on advice from Linda Carroll, a marriage therapist (and Courtney Love’s mom).

Carroll appeared on an episode of the “Art of Charm” podcast to talk all things love and relationships and shared four reasons to leave a relationship immediately:

 

1. Your partner is abusive

It doesn’t matter whether the abuse is physical, verbal, sexual, emotional, or financial, Carroll said. You need to leave.

Carroll added that even couples with major issues could figure out how to make the relationship work — but in the meantime, you should “get away and move away and protect yourself.”

2. Your partner has a character disorder that manifests in lying and jealousy

Carroll specified that this was a red flag only if “it’s constant — it’s not just a bad moment.”

Again, she said that if your partner is really committed to overcoming these issues, it’s possible to make the relationship work. But in the meantime, you should get some space.

3. You’ve done all you can do and it’s just not working

“It doesn’t mean that somebody’s bad,” Carroll said. “Maybe you got together because you were needy or you didn’t choose well.” Or maybe, she added, what worked for you at age 22 doesn’t work for you at age 40.

The point is that relationships take effort — but there’s only so much effort you can put in. At a certain point, it might be time to cut your losses.

4. You just know, ‘deep in your gut’

When you “just know” you need to call it quits, Carroll said, it’s not a “panicky” feeling.

It’s not that intense feeling of “I can’t stand this person!” that you get when they’re chewing too loudly. It’s also not that dramatic feeling of “I’d rather be single!” that arises when they tell the same story for the billionth time.

“You know, for your own reasons, that you really are done,” Carroll said. “It probably less to do with the other person than with you.”

couple fighting annoyed complainHere is one very bad reason to leave a relationship: Your partner is an ordinary person.

If you don’t feel madly in love every day, or if the things that made you fall in love are now annoying you, that’s not a definite sign that you should break up.

In fact, other relationship experts seem to agree that sometimes being miserable, bored, frustrated, and/or angry is part of the deal when you get married. (The same logic probably applies to long-term relationships, too.)

As one marriage educator put it, “There will be times when one or both” people in a relationship “want out and can barely stand the sight of each other.”

Bottom line — and we know this is annoying — no one can make the breakup decision for you.

 

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