Dating and Relationship Advice – Men: Taking Off The Mask

When beginning any new career, hobby, or general pursuit, it’s easy to day dream about the time when all our hard work has paid off and we are basking in the glory of  fame, money, or women’s panties. It’s those daydreams that drive us to push harder, take chances, and try things outside of our comfort zone.  Therefore, for many aspiring  Casanovas, we look forward to the time where we can walk up to any woman, whether in a bar or on the street, whisper a few sweet words in her ear and she grabs us by the hand and into the back of a darkly lit booth.

As great or horrible as that might seem to you, it’s really not a one size fits all dream. It might be hard to believe, but not every guy out there wants to sleep with everything with a vagina.  Some guys just want help asking out their secret crush, best friend, or help finding a date in general and they turn to the phicklephilly community in order to help them achieve their goal, and there is nothing wrong with that. On almost a daily basis, it’s not uncommon for me to educate both men and women, that the majority of guys aren’t looking to sleep with hundreds of women, they just want help finding that one special woman to settle down and start a family with.

Now there are many different books, routines, and experts out there who claim they know the secrets to picking up women, and we’re no different.  However, at the end of the day, you will find that the routines and methods that work best, are the ones that worked for you. Just like there are thousands of diets and exercise plans out there, some work and some are crap, but ultimately, you are going to go with the plan that helps you both reach your goal, as well as, fit your lifestyle. So I cannot stress enough how important it is, from early on in your training, to pick the methods, routines, and approaches that fit your personality. I say this not because I don’t think certain methods will work, any method will work as long as you’re calm, confident, and try it enough times. I tell you this because at some point, you may want to settle down or establish a long-term relationship with a woman and if the man that she wakes up with the next morning or goes on that next date with is a complete 180 from the man she met at the bar telling stories and performing tricks, then it will be a very tough transition as you try to make a long term relationship work.

The concept of a Mask comes these die-hard Pick Up Artists you read about. As you read more and more of their conquests, you’ll start to see a pattern develop.  PUA sees girl, PUA approaches girl.  PUA runs routine X, Y, and Z.  PUA gets number, kiss, or sex, rinse and repeat. These guys are great at what they do, and aspiring PUAs worship them for it.  But the sad reality is that these guys are as only as deep as their bag of tricks.  Once they’ve run through their routines, there’s nothing left.  They’ve gotten so great at the game that their routines and approaches define them as a person. Without them, there is only a shell of a man because they have become a cliche’ of themselves.  They spent so much time working on and practicing how to be someone else, they forgot how to be themselves, and women will eventually see through all this.  Even if they wanted a long-term relationship, most women won’t go for it as they tire after the guy has run the same line on her from the 20th time.

It’s no secret that the main reason a routine or approach works is because you were confident when you were presenting it.  In one word, that’s the secret to being successful with women, confidence. We give you these routines to follow, because it gives you a script that you can practice, rehearse, and repeat so that it becomes second nature to you. So that every time you follow this script, you are more confident, because A. you believe that it will work, and B. it comes from a higher authority with their stamp of approval.  Have you ever given a speech?  Did you prepare ahead of time or did you just make it up on the spot and wing it. If you just made it up, I bet it was hard to give, might have flubbed over some words. But if you prepared and rehearsed, it was easier to deliver, your speech was strong and your body language was confident. The same concept applies to approaches and routines.

So I encourage you to take off the mask and incorporate your personality into the routines you run and don’t try to incorporate elements that don’t fit who you are. If you aren’t good with wordplay, don’t attempt so much banter.  If you don’t like being the center of attention, don’t try and perform a stupid magic trick that involves a large group of people to pull off.  But do incorporate parts of your personality, tell personal stories, talk about your hobbies, don’t show fake action shots of the activities you’re expected to be doing. Instead, modify the routine to fit parts of you into it.  Sure it requires some thought and there is more work on your part, as well as it doesn’t carry the same stamp of approval because you went off the script a little. But I guarantee that you will find success because you are no longer the same guy who struggled around women a few months ago, you are confident and women are drawn to that confidence, and because of this, they will be interested in the things that you might have thought kept you from getting a girl before. The worst thing that can happen is they say no and you move back to the things that worked, but you just might find yourself making a real connection this time around. That is of course if you’re looking to make one. If all you want is as many numbers and one night stands as you can get, see girl, approach girl, run routine X, Y, and Z.

 

Was this helpful? I’d love to hear your feedback in regard to this post!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day at 8am & 12pm EST.

Instagram: @phicklephilly Facebook: phicklephilly

Advertisements

Author: phicklephilly

Copyright © 2016 by Phicklephilly All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. All stories and characters are based on real people and events. The names and images have been changed to protect their privacy. Comment Rules: Remember what Fonzie was like? Cool. That’s how we’re gonna be — cool. Critical is fine, but if you’re rude, we’ll delete your stuff. Please do not put your URL in the comment text and please use your PERSONAL name or initials and not your business name, as the latter comes off like spam. Have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation!”

3 thoughts on “Dating and Relationship Advice – Men: Taking Off The Mask”

  1. Yeah it was helpful.

    I enjoyed reading this.

    We all need to realize the with whatever we do, we have to learn to be ourselves through and through. If someone sees you once and isn’t interested, it saves one of emotional ache of not being the person the other partner thought they were.

    Best to let people know what they are getting. No bull shit.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Canned scripts can only get you so far. I never aspired to some PUA or Mystery Method. Picking up women in night clubs and bars is not my thing; I found Speed Seduction techniques to be effective. Don’t you find that once you start to do seduction activity it seems that women pick up on your energy and you become a magnet……

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s